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Barney Stinson Articles

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Fan fiction by dreamer369 posted over a year ago
fan of it?
3 fans
The Chick Code

ARTICLE 1: Chicks before dicks. The bond between two women is stronger than the bond between a man and a woman because, on average, women are more willing and able to commit than men. Unfortunate for our love lives, but true.

ARTICLE 2: A Chick is always entitled to do something wild, as long as the rest of her Side-Chicks* are all doing it. For example: partaking in "WOOO!"-ing.

ARTICLE 3: A Chick never divulges the existence of the Chick Code to a man. It is a sacred document not to be shared with guys for any reason...no, not even that reason. (Note: if you a man reading this, first, let me apologize: it was never my intention for this book to contain so many big words. Second, I urge you to look at this document for what it is – a piece of fiction meant to entertain a broad audience through the prism of stereotypical gender differences. I mean, sometimes it really is like we're from different planets! Clearly, no real person would actually believe or adhere to the vulgar rules contained within.** Oh, and have you been working out?)
Opinion by bdavis98 posted over a year ago
fan of it?
3 fans
As we all know from the first episode of this LEGENDARY show that robin is “AUNT” robin that she’s NOT the mother and we all understood why ted told his kids about his romantic relationship with robin because of her he got a tattoo, which lead him to his (first fiancé) which lead to being a professor in college which lead to him to meeting their kid’s mother.

As much as we all love the other aspects in the show (barney legendary life, robin being candid, lily being bad-ass, Marshall being supernatural believer, ted being the geek) the whole point of this show is who is the mother and how ted met her and how amazing their love story is, but this whole robin & ted every season thing ruining I mean if I was ted’s kids and keep listing to my dad going on and on about this woman he loved before he met my mother and how every once and while he realizes that he’s still in love with her over the years, I wouldn’t like that person all that much I might even hate her the fact is that she’s still “aunt” and still hangs with them and stuff makes it extremely weird and awkward and not logical at all. I mean how this mother can even be around robin knowing...
Article by dacastinson posted over a year ago
fan of it?
4 fans
I know what you’re thinking,
What’s Barney been drinking?
That girl was smoking hot!

Yes I coulda nailed her,
But no it’s not a failure,
‘Cuz there’s one thing she is not.

To score a ten would be just fine,
But I’d rather be dressed to the nines,
It’s a truth you can’t refute!
Nothing suits me like a suit!

Picture a world
where all the boys and girls
Are impeccably well dressed.
That delivery guy
in the jacket and tie,
That puppy in the double-breast.

That ’80s dude in mutton chops,
That baby with a lollipop,
That lady cop who’s kinda cute...
Nothing suits ‘em like a suit!

Wingman I can wear,
They’re oh so debonair,
The perfect way to snare
a girl with daddy issues.

In navy blue or black,
Check out this perfect rack.
I want to give them a squeeze!

Article by dacastinson posted over a year ago
fan of it?
6 fans
Barney: Stop pining over Marshall and Lily! Have some self respect. Now put this fiver in your mouth so that stripper with the lazy eye can vacuum it up with...
Ted: Barney! I'm allowed to miss them alright? They're my two best friends.
Barney: I'm your two best friends!

Barney: Ted, when they serve alcohol at a strip club, you're not allowed to show your vagina.

Barney: Yes! Tonight is gonna be Legen... wait are we sure it's a good idea to go to a strip club? Shut Up Lily I'm in charge now... Dary!

Barney: So you're pregnant? Huh, looks like nobody told your boobs.

Barney: I want American Scotch from Scotland!

Barney: Hashtag burn, hashtag your tie is still dumb, hash tag refill!

Fan fiction by HouseOfficeFan7 posted over a year ago
fan of it?
4 fans
Author's Note: I feel like this isn't very good... But there'll probably be more and hopefully it will get better. Anyway... The basic premise is that Dr. Horrible is the fifth doppleganger. Let me know what you think. Also, this will be posted on multiple spots. It will also appear in the HIMYM spot and the NPH spot.

Ted, Robin, Marshall and Lily were sitting watching a football game in Ted’s apartment. It was an uneventful Saturday afternoon when suddenly Barney rushed into the apartment.

“GUYS!” He cried, slamming the door behind him.

“No, Barney…” Ted groaned. “Whatever crazy thing you want to do… just no.”

“There’s no crazy thing!” Barney said. “I was on the internet last night--”

Lily grimaced. “Barney… you on the internet? Do we want to hear the way this story ends?” She asked.

Barney scowled at her. “Lily! I don’t watch porn on the internet!” He said, outraged. Ted and
Marshall snorted.