I love you <3
Last chapter:
“No buts Julian. This is it. This is the movie of your career, the movie that will make my firm the most popular in Hollywood. So it’s either the girl, or the end of your career,” Paul said firmly as he walked towards him, “You have one week to make your decision. These are your plane tickets. I hope to see you or your resignation letter in my office in LA next Monday.”
--
The next evening, Brooke was getting ready for a date with Julian. She was exceptionally excited about this date because Julian asked her to dress up saying that he had a surprise for her, and Brooke Davis loved surprises.
“Can you take off that sickeningly bright smile of your face? It makes me want to puke,” Sam said rolling her eyes as she walked in her foster mother’s room and plopped messily of her neatly made bed.
“Sam I just made that,” Brooke groaned, turning to glare at the smirking teenager.
“See, now that’s the expression I like,” Sam said approvingly pointing at her scowling face.
“Very funny Sam,” Brooke said sarcastically, “You’re just jealous.”
“Jealous? Of what? You looking like an idiot? I don’t think so,” Sam said stubbornly.
“You amuse me Sam, you really do. One minute you’re all supportive of Julian and me, and the next you have a problem with me smiling because I am happy with Julian. You have to make up your mind,” Brooke said teasingly.
“Oh no, I don’t have any problem with you and Julian. I just have a problem with your chirpy face every morning. I don’t think I have ever seen anyone smile so much,” Sam shot back grinning.
“I know I look like a teenager with a crush, but I can’t help it. Julian makes me really happy, Sam. I haven’t felt like this in, well ever since I graduated high school,” Brooke said seriously.
“So when are you going to tell him those three life changing words,” Sam asked curiously.
“I’m pregnant is just two words. Well technically it’s three but—”
“I mean when are you going to tell him that you’re in love with him?” Sam asked rolling her eyes, “But I guess the other one would be a good question too.”
“I don’t know,” Brooke said hesitantly, “I am just going to wait for the right time, I guess.”
“When’s the right time going to be? When you give birth to his kid?” Sam asked sarcastically.
“Sam—”
“What I am serious! You’re probably the world’s biggest procrastinator especially when it comes to feelings and stuff,” Sam said bored, “Look how long it took you to actually agree to date Julian.”
“That was different okay,” Brooke said dismissively.
“Well duh. Last time it was about sex. This time it’s about you being pregnant with little Julian. Very different,” Sam said enjoying pushing Brooke’s buttons.
“Sam must you be so blunt?” Brooke asked shaking her head.
“Hey, I just want to find out if you’re actually going to come out clean to him or if I am going to have to spoon feed him the information. And that might get ugly,” Sam said innocently.
“Samantha Walker, don’t you dare. You’re not going to tell him anything. Promise me that you won’t a breath a word to him about this pregnancy or my feels,” Brooke said panicked.
“Only if you promise me that you will actually make an effort to tell him at least one of your big news tonight,” Sam proposed.
“Fine, fine, I’ll try, I promise,” Brooke relented, “But if it turns out to be a disaster then I’m blaming you.”
“Everything’s going to fine Brooke,” Sam assured, and Brooke couldn’t help but believe her.
--
10 minutes later while Brooke was putting on her earrings, the doorbell rang indicating Julian’s arrival.
“Sam could you get that,” Brooke shouted.
“Already there,” Sam shouted back as Brooke heard her unlocking the door.
“Hey Samson,” she heard Julian’s voice greet her foster daughter, and just his voice was enough to put a smile on her face. God, she was in too deep for this guy.
“Hey Julian, wassup?” Sam asked as she stepped back to let him in.
“The usual,” Julian answered, closing the door behind him, “Where’s Brooke?”
“She’s getting ready,” Sam answered, “She should be here in a couple of minutes.”
“Ok, cool,” Julian said nervously, raking his hands through his hair.
“Are you okay, Julian?” Sam asked concerned.
“Yeah, I am fine. Why?” Julian asked trying to put a smile on his face.
“Nothing, you just seem distracted,” Sam noted.
“Oh it’s nothing. Just a little nervous,” Julian lied, trying to laugh it off. Sam obviously didn’t buy it, because seriously Julian has never been nervous before a date, but thankfully she didn’t ask anymore questions.
“Hey,” Brooke greeted cheerfully as she appeared at the top of the stairs.
“Hey,” Julian replied, turning his gaze towards the stairs, and the second his eyes met Brooke’s, a real smile appeared on his face. This was the affect Brooke Davis had on him. One look, and he was grinning like an idiot. And the fact that her face lit up every time she saw him, it made him feel like the most accomplished man in this world. God, he was in too deep. But he knew that tonight was the last time her face would light up because of him. He knew that tonight was the last time she would laugh with him, kiss him, last time she would talk to him. After tonight, he would be nothing short of a monster to her. Another addition to the lost list of men that had already broken her heart. His heart broke into a million pieces at that thought, but he knew there was no other choice. He had to end it with her, no matter how much it killed him to do it.
He was brought out of his reverie when he felt Brooke’s small hand caressing his face as she called his name trying to get his attention.
“Huh? What?” Julian asked stupidly.
“Where have you been? I’ve called your name 3 times. I know I look pretty, but I didn’t know I looked good enough to drive you speechless,” Brooke said teasingly, pulling her hand away from his face.
“I am sorry. I was just thinking,” Julian said apologetically as he leaned down and placed a soft kiss on her lips.
“It’s okay,” Brooke said a little breathlessly as they pulled up for air.
“So you ready to go?” Julian asked placing his hand on the small of her back.
“Yeah, let’s go,” Brooke agreed, then turning around she called out, “Sam keep all the door locked, and—”
“Call you if there’s any sort of emergency and absolutely no parties. Yeah I know. You say that before every date, it has kinda sunk in by now,” Sam finished rolling her eyes as she poked her head out of her bedroom, smiling mischievously at her foster mother.
“Well you can’t blame me for being cautious can you?” Brooke asked pouting as Julian laughed.
“I guess not. But have a good time you guys,” Sam said smiling.
“We will,” Brooke said confidently as she and Julian made their way out of the door.
As Sam heard the door close shut behind the couple, she released a sigh. She knew there was something off with Julian tonight. She had never seen him act so oddly, and he was never nervous. Wondering what was wrong with him, Sam made her way to the couch, praying with all her might that Julian’s odd behavior was only temporary, because if it was anything other than that, well she didn’t even want to think about the possibility.
--
“Wow Julian, I can’t believe you got us reservations to one of the most elite restaurant in Tree Hill,” Brooke said impressed as she walked into Tree Hill Steak House, “Don’t you need to make reservations 5 months in advance to get in here or something?”
“Normal people do,” Julian acknowledged as he led her to the reception area.
“Table for 2 under the name Baker,” Julian said to the manager.
“Right this way, sir,” the manager said once he had consulted his reservation list.
“So are you saying that we’re not normal people,” Brooke whispered resuming their previous conversation.
“No, we’re just special,” Julian said smirking as they approached their table.
“Please take a seat,” the manager said courteously, “A waiter will be with you shortly.”
“Julian you’re not giving me straight answers, and I don’t appreciate that,” Brooke said pouting once she had taken her seat.
“Fine, fine. I know one of the managers here. That’s why I was able to get a reservation at such a short period,” Julian admitted.
“Ahh so the truth finally comes out,” Brooke said grinning, “But I’ve got to say, this is amazing. And they even seated us in a private seating area.”
“Actually I asked them to seat us in a private area,” Julian said smiling mischievously.
“Julian, you didn’t need to do that,” Brooke gasped out, “Private seating is so expensive.”
“I wanted this night to be special, Brooke,” Julian said sincerely.
“Just being with you is special enough Julian. You didn’t need to do all this,” Brooke whispered her face glowing in the soft candle light.
“You look beautiful,” Julian said softly as he grasped her hand in the middle of the table.
“You look pretty dashing yourself Mr. Baker,” Brooke complimented, loving the feeling of his thumb stroking the soft skin of her hand.
Julian looked tempted to lean over to kiss her, but they were interrupted by the arrival of their waiter.
“Good evening,” the waiter greeted pleasantly, “Do you guys know what you will be ordering this evening?”
“I’ll have prime rib with mashed potatoes and gravy with a small helping of salad,” Julian ordered.
“And I’ll just have grilled chicken with salad,” Brooke said politely.
“Any appetizers or drinks?” the waiter questioned.
“Can we just have a serving of garlic bread sticks?” Julian asked as the waiter jotted down the order, “And I’ll take red wine with the dinner.”
“And you maam?” the waiter asked turning towards Brooke.
“I’ll just have lemonade thank you,” Brooke said, avoiding Julian’s questioning gaze.
“Will that be it?” the waiter asked.
“Yes, thank you,” Julian said nodding to the waiter.
“Was I hallucinating of did you just order lemonade?” Julian asked surprised once the waiter had left.
“What’s so shocking about me ordering lemonade?” Brooke asked defensively.
“Nothing, except for the fact that you’re the biggest wine drinker I know. And from all the first class wines available on the menu, you chose lemonade?” Julian asked quirking his eyebrows.
“Maybe I just didn’t feel like drinking wine today,” Brooke said dismissively, “That’s not a crime is it.”
“Fine, fine, no need to be so touchy,” Julian said raising his hand in defeat, “You drink whatever you want to, but if it’s about wanting to save my money, don’t worry about it. I have more than enough.”
“Trust me Julian, this has nothing to do with saving you money. I promise,” Brooke said in a tone bordering on finality and Julian knew the topic was over.
As Brooke looked at Julian, she knew this was the perfect time to tell him about the pregnancy, but she didn’t want to ruin the perfect atmosphere. She still didn’t know how he would react to the news, and she didn’t want to take any chances. At least that’s what she kept telling herself.
--
“That was absolutely amazing Julian,” Brooke said sighing contently on their way back.
“I am glad you liked it,” Julian said sincerely sending her a smile that sent her heart fluttering.
“You know what would make this night absolutely perfect?” Brooke asked contemplatively.
“No, but I have a feeling that you are going to tell me,” Julian teased.
“A walk at the beach,” Brooke said dreamily.
“Brooke it’s about 50 degrees outside, you’re wearing a dress and not to mention your 5 inch heels, and you want to go walk on the beach?” Julian asked incredulously.
“I am just saying, doesn’t mean we have to do it,” Brooke said shrugging.
“Okay,” Julian said training his eyes back on the road.
However 5 minutes later, he turned onto a road going the complete opposite direction to her house.
“Julian, I don’t know if you’ve forgotten, but my house is on the opposite side,” Brooke said uncertainly.
“I know,” Julian said shrugging nonchalantly.
“Then why are we going this way?” Brooke asked incredulously.
“Because we’ve had a sudden change of plans,” Julian said vaguely.
“Change of plan? Where are we going now?” Brooke asked curiously.
“To the docks,” Julian said simply, and from the corner of his eyes, he watched as Brooke’s face went from being curious to one radiating excitement.
“To the docks? But what about the cold weather and my 5 inch heels?” Brooke asked mockingly as her eyes glittered in happiness.
“Guess I’ll just have to take a risk,” Julian said smiling, “Anything to get you your perfect date.”
“Aww aren’t you a sweetheart,” Brooke said affectionately as she leaned over and gave him a quick peck on the cheek.
“Please don’t use the word sweetheart when you’re describing me. It’s bad for my image,” Julian said smirking.
“Well then should I call you mathlete? Is that better for your image?” Brooke asked teasingly.
“Touché,” Julian said grinning, knowing that Brooke had won that argument.
“Plus, I am your girlfriend. I can call you whatever I want and you can’t complain about it,” Brooke said smugly.
“I guess, but only because you’re so cute,” Julian replied grinning as he parked the car in the empty parking lot next to the docks.
“Shall we my lady?” Julian asked putting up a British accent as he opened the passenger side’s door to help Brooke out.
“We shall kind sir,” Brooke said placing her hand in his outstretched one, her eyes twinkling with mirth.
“You sure you’re going to be fine in the heels?” Julian asked caringly.
“I’ll be fine. And anyways, I have you to lean on don’t I?” Brooke asked seriously, her eyes finding his as he found it hard to look away from her intense gaze.
“I’m here,” Julian promised, his insides filling up with guilt and pain as he realized that this was probably his last happy hour with Brooke.
“Good,” Brooke said as she leaned up and softly placed her lips against his as he instinctively pulled her closer to his body.
“You’re amazing, you know that right?” Julian asked softly once they had come up for air.
“So I’ve heard. But it means the most when you say it,” Brooke said gently stroking his face, and Julian almost lost it right there. He knew he was leading her on, he knew that he was about to hurt her. He knew that he should have ended this when he first walked into her door. But he hadn’t listened to the rational side of his brain. And as a result, after tonight, it would be much harder for the both of them to let go.
“Hey what happened? You dozed off again,” Brooke said concerned as Julian came back to reality.
“I was just thinking how beautiful you look today. And how you deserve so much better than me,” Julian said honestly as they started walking along the shore.
“You’re good enough Julian. You’re more than good enough for me. And it’s about time you realize that,” Brooke said seriously as she laid her head on his shoulder, his arm supporting both of their weights.
“You know in the book, when Lucas described you as the girl who would change the world someday, I didn’t know what to make out of it. But now I understand what he meant by that. You have changed my world Brooke Davis,” Julian admitted softly looking down at his girlfriend’s smiling face on his shoulder.
“You changed my life too Julian Baker. Before you, I had given up hope of being happy again, and then you happened and my life took a whole new turn. You gave me something to look forward to Julian. You gave me my life back and that makes you the most important person in my life right now. Well first Sam and then you, but you know what I mean,” Brooke said smiling as Julian laughed.
“I think I am okay with taking second place to Sam. Had it been anyone other than her, I wouldn’t have been so accommodating, but Sam’s okay,” Julian said giving Brooke his infamous grin as he pulled her closer to him.
“Those words and that grin combined together just make me lo—like you even more,” Brooke said catching herself just in time.
Julian nearly felt his heart stop at her words. Even though the transition had been fast, he had caught her stumble, and as he looked at the woman next to him, he couldn’t help but think, was she about to say that she loved him?
“Are you cold?” Julian asked as she felt Brooke shudder against his chest.
“A little,” Brooke said sheepishly.
“Here take this,” Julian said immediately taking off his jacket as carefully draping it around her shoulder.
“What about you? Aren’t you going to be cold?” Brooke asked half heartedly, loving the warmth Julian’s jacket was providing her cold body.
“Nah, I’ll be fine. I’ve got you to warm me up don’t I?” Julian asked grinning as he once again draped his arms around Brooke’s waist pulling her as close to his body as possible.
But before he could take another step forward, Brooke suddenly turned him towards her, and Julian acting on instinct, leaned down and quickly placed his lips tenderly on hers. It didn’t take her long to respond, and very soon they were both fully making out in the middle of the beach completely lost into each other and their feelings.
“Wow that was amazing,” Brooke gasped out as Julian finally released her.
“Does that surprise you?” Julian asked his breathing slightly uneven.
“No, not really,” Brooke admitted as she brought his face down to meet hers for yet another breathtaking kiss.
--
After ½ an hour of an intense make out session, Brooke and Julian finally decided to return home.
As Brooke unlocked the front door, she couldn’t keep a grin from appearing on her face as she remembered the past 30 minutes.
“You want to come in?” Brooke asked as she stepped in her foyer.
“Yeah sure,” Julian said hesitantly. He knew that this was it. He was going to come clean to her right now. This was probably the last time he would see her smiling like that towards him. That thought was enough to break his heart into two.
“Brooke,” Julian called out as he grasped her wrist and turned her towards him.
“Yeah,” Brooke asked pressed tightly against his chest.
“I-I want—oh fuck this—” Julian growled out as he crashed his mouth against her surprised one. He knew he was acting like a coward, trying to prolong the moment for as long as he could. But he had to kiss her one last time, kiss her with so much intensity and power that it would forever be embedded in his memory, because he knew that he would never feel for another woman what he felt for Brooke.
“I love you,” Brooke breathed out once he had pulled away. Her eyes were closed and her lips swollen, and for a second Julian thought he was hallucinating.
“What?” Julian gasped out.
“I love you,” Brooke said louder as she opened her eyes to stare into his stunned ones, “I love you.”
“No, Brooke, you can’t,” Julian said panicked. This wasn’t happening. This couldn’t be happening. She couldn’t tell him that she loved him a minute before he was about to break up with her.
“Why can’t I, Julian?” Brooke asked confused, “I know that this might come as a shock to you, and I don’t expect you to say it back, but I do love you.”
“Don’t say that Brooke. Don’t say that,” Julian said harshly.
“Why are you acting like this Julian? What’s so horrible about me loving you?” Brooke asked hurt.
“It’s horrible because you’re going to be biting back your words in about one minute,” Julian said frantically.
“What?” Brooke asked even more confused now, “Why would I be biting back my words. It had taken me long enough to get the courage to tell you this, I don’t think I’ll be biting it back.”
“You will. Once you hear what I’ve got to say, you will be,” Julian said sadly, his eyes filled with so much pain and misery that Brooke felt her heart clench in her chest. Something was very wrong.
“Julian what are you talking about? The only situation I would be taking my words back would be if you—Oh my god, you’re breaking up with me!” Brooke gasped out as realization dawned on her face.
“Brooke I—”
“You’re breaking up with me? You’re breaking up with me?” Brooke asked stunned. How had they gone from ending their perfect date to him breaking up with her?
“I am leaving,” Julian admitted softly.
“What do you mean you’re leaving?” Brooke asked trying to make some sense of the situation.
“I am going back to LA,” Julian clarified.
“What? You can’t do that. What about Luke’s movie?” Brooke asked angrily.
“The movie’s been cancelled Brooke. The director quit, and there’s no way we’d make the deadline with a new one. So the movie’s off. And I’ve got an amazing offer to produce the film adaptation of Gossip Girl in Hollywood--”
“And you chose Gossip Girl,” Brooke finished for him, “When are you leaving?”
“6 days,” Julian said quietly.
“So tonight, it was all a hoax? You were leading me on the whole time?” Brooke asked incredulously.
“Brooke I would never—”
“But you did, Julian. You knew you were going to be leaving the whole time, and yet you didn’t say a word to me. I can’t believe you of all people would do that to me. And to think that I actually thought that you were the one for me,” Brooke said disgustedly as tears started falling from her eyes.
“Brooke, I am so sorry,” Julian said softly.
“And to think that I told you I loved you? How stupid am I? After everything that had happened to me, I can’t believe I actually believed that maybe for once everything would be okay. Well I guess your job’s done. You made Brooke Davis fall in love and ended up breaking her heart worse than any other man had done before. You should be proud of yourself, because seriously this is a new low for me,” Brooke choked out as tears blurred her vision.
“I didn’t mean to hurt you Brooke,” Julian said sadly knowing that he had done the one thing he had promised never to do. He had made Brooke Davis a broken woman again.
“You know what the sad part is Julian? The fact that my perfect date was nothing but a bunch of lies. I—”
“Tonight was not a lie Brooke. I meant everything I said to you. Tonight was not a lie,” Julian said desperately.
“But it seems like it. I can’t believe anything you’ve ever told me. I can’t believe I gave my heart to someone who didn’t even like me enough to be honest with me,” Brooke said bitterly.
“I know I should have told you in the beginning Brooke—”
“Then why didn’t you? Huh? Why didn’t you end it before taking me on that date that just made me fall deeper for you? Why Julian? Was this your idea of some sick joke?” Brooke asked hysterically.
“I never wanted to hurt you Brooke. Trust me that was the last thing I wanted,” Julian whispered, not knowing how to answer the rest of her questions when he still wasn’t sure why he hadn’t told her the truth in the very beginning.
“Just leave Julian,” Brooke said tearfully.
“Brooke—”
“Just leave dammit. Get out of my house and my life. I don’t want to see your face again,” Brooke shouted her mind numb by the shock and pain of everything that had happened in the past 10 minutes.
And Julian knew that this was it. Their relationship was now officially over. Lowering his head in defeat, he just nodded quietly and turning on his heels, he walked out of the door and out of Brooke’s life.
When Brooke heard the door shut behind him, she let go off the couch as her knees buckled beneath her and she fell to the floor tears falling like waterfalls from her eyes. Julian was gone, and as her hands found her flat abdomen, she realized bitterly that he wasn’t just gone for her life. He was gone from their life.
