Critical Analysis of Twilight Article: IS SM into brain-washing?

9

posted by kayleebabee

Is it just me or is SM into brainwashing? She has systamatically taken over the world with her books. Next she will be Americas first ever hem hem SPARKLY PRESIDENT (no offence Barrack you rock) and twi hardiness has been taken to a whole knew level people religions such as CULLENISM yes you guys heard me cul-llen-ism.
Here is the cullenism 10 'commandments'

1.thou shalt wear gold contact lenses-even to sleep!
2. thou shalt only drink cherryade or cranberry juice (bassically its gotta be red)
3. thou shalt not take the lords name in vain (robert pattinson) cept when you are screaming it at his public appearances and in the middle of the night when you are asleep.
4.thou shalt only eat with forks (as in.. well you all know what it symbolises.. hopefully) even soup good luck with that.
5.thou shalt be commited to a mental hospital
6. thou shalt be a spinster forever
7.thou shalt not go to bed without reading a chapter of one of our bibles
8.thou shalt be scary
9.thou shalt drink 8 galleons of water every day because of yuour drooling over robert pattinson
10.thou shalt kiss all of your twilight merchandise 300000000000000000001 times a day.

(5-10 are my own lolage)

I mean I used to be a twihard but not anymore as that is crosssing the line from sanity to insanity in a huge leap!
I mean soon there will be churches preaching the huge sack of dog vomit and they will sing hymns about how sexy and great the cullens are and they will have four bibles twilight,new moon, eclipse and Barfing dawn (sorry meant breaking dawn!)
You know the painted glass with pics of Jesus and god and all holy people that you get in churches well in the twi-church It will be the cullens and mebbe Jacob.
Iknow this sounds scary but it is true some twifans have lost what little dignity and brain cells they had left in their bodies by soing Cullenism!
but since this is turning into a book I'll leave it at that.
If you agree with me Please say why in comments and if you dont please say whay in comments
thank you

Phoebe_Gabriel, mispulka and 7 others like this

Mrs-Grint Hahaha! Yeah that could actually happen since there is a sort-of Star Wars cult religion. Where the followers actually where Jedi knight uniform things.. -CoughHOWSADCough- Oh my god. What if they do? Propably all Harry Potter fans will be rounded up to concentration camps... IT'S WORLD WAR THREE!!! Better start writing my diary now... if you don't know who Anne Frank is you WILL NOT get that....

kayleebabee Yes I do know who anne frank is lolage x and mebe twihards will run about in pure white makeup and glitter !!!! get ready to do battle lolage

Dearheart LOL, actually I agree. Barack Obama is definitely the "Twilight" of all the presidents, IMO. (But that's a WHOLE other tangent that I might make a soapbox about later and PLEASE DON'T BITE MY HEAD OFF FOR COMPARING OBAMA TO TWILIGHT!) *shields head* Ahem...ANYWAY, personally I don't think Stephenie Meyer [i]meant[/i] to brainwash people with Twilight, but brainwashing has happened, nonetheless. What's scary is that when I first started reading the book, even when I'd been warned about it, I could literally [i]feel[/i] myself being sucked into it for a few seconds (if that makes any sense, lol). It's like my brain got switched off or something...but when I shook my head and reread it, my common sense and inner writer starting screaming "This is SO bad in SO many ways!" I've heard it said by other people that it's like the pages are laced with crack (metaphorically speaking, lol). And they are RIGHT. *shudders* As for the "Cullenism"...I think it's probably more for fun than anything else, but if they're serious...that is pretty sad.

kayleebabee yes but you can stop shielding your head now dear heart lolage

Dearheart Haha, okay. *un-shields head* Oy, politics... =P

renrae "Where the followers actually where Jedi knight uniform things.. -CoughHOWSADCough-" Come on, it's freaking awesome. Insult the Jedis, you will not.

kayleebabee umm guys is anyone else scared of edward cullen fanatics? ...Cause i think theres one in my closet!!!! HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

spellpatronus Stephanie Meyer ruined the world.

4

Conan's Assistants

added by nuxi

Source: Tonight Show

15

The 100 Year Old Virgin

posted by MadamOcta13

Lately, I've heard and seen jokes and comments about Edward being "pathetic" or "gay" because he was a 100 year old virgin. I've written this article to state that I see no problem in him being a virgin. I feel that virginity is not something to poke fun at. It simply means that someone wants to save themselves for that special someone whom they are going to spend the rest of their life with. I myself am a virgin and plan to stay that way until I get married.

However, I am somewhat confused. If Edward has lived for 100 years and has yet to give himself to anyone, then why does he decide to have...

6

My favorite TwiHard video directed at antis

added by bendaimmortal

Seriously it's scary to think this Twihard may have been serious with these statements. This is a version with the Black Pawn Movement's riffs because the original video has been removed by the user. For some reason they ALWAYS are! ;D

video

opinion

school

lesson

twilight

lol

anti

lmao

twihard

twihater

7

Vegetarian Vamp: om nom nom nom

added by rachaelwsz

Source: ~necros900 @ deviantart

14

Capion Contest #3

added by renrae

Source: screencapheaven

39

Hello, I'm...

added by spikes_girl

Source: THEZEBRA @ SodaHead

12

A Rant About Twilight Fangirls

added by xxXsk8trXxx

I think that it's true

video

criticism

true

rant

twilight

10

Twilight Spoof Sims 2

added by spikes_girl

*chuckle* Not hilarious but some random parts are kinda funny :) Like 1:28.

video

twilight

spoof

parody

sims 2

bella

edward

rosalie

alice

funny

15

YouTuber WIN!

added by renrae

Source: YouTube

18

Pet Peeve: Name Mispellings

posted by renrae

This is a short little rant, people.

I don't know about you, but one of my biggest pet peeves is when people spell my name wrong.

On Fanpop, I've gotten ranrea, renre, renray, ranraa, and many others. In real life, I've gotten Reagan, Regon, Regen, Reagen.... and people are always misspelling my last name (I'm not displaying that here.)

One thing I've noticed on Fanpop (and many other fansites, as well) is that people often fail to spell Stephenie Meyer's name right. That's right: StephEnie, with an E right there. Not an 'a'. An 'e'.

Some people have completely butchered Meyer's name. Stephanie,...

15

Jacob Black : A Rant

posted by OCFan123

Okay, so I just wrote an article called "Bella Swan: A Rant", and it seems a lot people liked it, which mad me glad! But I've deicided to write an article about Jacob Black, one of the most loved, yet hated characters in the twilight saga
--

Now, what I don't get is why so many people (Especially Edward lovers) hate the guy so much. Okay, yes, he can be selfish, but he was so kind and sweet in New Moon to Bella. He helped her when no one else could, and started to make her smile and laugh again. I really loved him in New Moon(more than Edward, that's for sure.) And to say I was ticked off when...

25

Twilight sucks

added by HPgirlLerman

31

Why I Dont Like Stephanie Meyer As An Author

posted by OCFan123

For people who were expecting this article to be earlier, really sorry about that! But I've been getting ready for school(WAH!), so...you get the point.
--
So, this article(as you can obviously see from the title) is about Stephanie Meyer. Oh yes, I'm pretty sure you've heard of her. The author of the Twilight Saga and the Host, she's pretty much one of the most popular writers at this point. Why?
I really don't know.
The list of reasons

1)Her writing
Okay, even back when I was a mega fan of twilight(bows head in shame), I never liked the writing. Its just..not good. Hard to explain really. Now reading...