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Hello! This is our fourth collab article on here (we love doing these, despite some of the complaints we’ve gotten), and we thought it would be fun to do another one. This time, we’ll be ranking the most attractive Disney Princes (or love interests). This article is with me, former Fanpop user Sk8er__grl, and link

DISCLAIMER: This can get kind of hard to read sometimes and we're sorry, but we did spend time editing it to make it easier to read. Also, there's a lot of bad language, but hey, Fanpop changed their age limit to sixteen so I think we can all handle it. I hope you enjoy!

Links to previous articles, in case you care, or want to leave some wonderful hate comments! <3
link link link


#10, THE PRINCE

LanaQueen: WoW I diDn't See ThAT comIng
OliviaRoseCake: cutie pie
OliviaRoseCake: just hella unmanly
OliviaRoseCake: how unattractive
LanaQueen: Except I did cause he looks like a girl.
OliviaRoseCake: DON'T BE RUDE ELANA
OliviaRoseCake: he may be insecure
Mary: He's not very attractive.
LanaQueen: If I looked like The Prince I'd be insecure too.
OliviaRoseCake: he's kinda ehhhh
Mary: Kinda looks like the opposite of a butch woman. If that makes sense.
OliviaRoseCake: Hey I'd kill for his lipstick'
OliviaRoseCake: what shade is that
OliviaRoseCake: rose 420
Mary: A shade lighter than Snow White's, I believe.
OliviaRoseCake: they're the type of couple who bonds over make-up
OliviaRoseCake: he's just kinda plain is all
Mary: Also his main outfit is ugly and doesn't look like it fits him.
OliviaRoseCake: plottwist: it's his dad's outfit
Mary: Pretty much. Blame it on the animation I guess.
LanaQueen: Didn't they have like, trouble animating guys for Snow White? it shows.
OliviaRoseCake: yeah that's why the only other men are little people
OliviaRoseCake: and refuse to show princie's face there

#9, PRINCE CHARMING

OliviaRoseCake: FINALLY
OliviaRoseCake: oh dang
OliviaRoseCake: how disappointing
Mary: He's bland too but also not that ugly.
LanaQueen: Wow, great picture.
Mary: Kinda cute.
OliviaRoseCake: these two are always at the bottom of everyone's lists
OliviaRoseCake: we're so basic!
LanaQueen: Yeah cause they're uggo.
Mary: Okay but is anybody actually busting it to a picture of him? Doubt.
LanaQueen: Jk but they're not the hottest.
LanaQueen: He looks like a male barbie doll.
OliviaRoseCake: Ken
OliviaRoseCake: the word you're looking for is Ken
LanaQueen: Yeah that's it.
Mary: Is this what hot was in the 1950's? I'm curious.
OliviaRoseCake: HOW DID YOU NOT KNOW
LanaQueen: LEAVE ME ALONE.
OliviaRoseCake: I think it is
OliviaRoseCake: he does kinda look like those old Hollywood guys
Mary: DID YOU NOT KNOW WHO KEN WAS.
LanaQueen: 1950's wanted their men bland and white.
OliviaRoseCake: so he looks pretty perfect for back them
LanaQueen: STOP IT I FEEL ATTACKED.
OliviaRoseCake: THEN FEEL ATTACKED BITCH
Mary: I thought you said black and white.

#8, ADAM/THE BEAST

OliviaRoseCake: actually he reminds of this barbie Ken doll
OliviaRoseCake: HEY I WASN'T DONE
OliviaRoseCake: hoe
LanaQueen: Mary always interrupts us like that!
OliviaRoseCake: Nvm onto Adam then!
Mary: Fine add more commentary to Charming and I'll edit it later.
OliviaRoseCake: Fuck me right?
LanaQueen: Yes fuck you.
OliviaRoseCake: nah it's cool let's talk about Fabio
LanaQueen: Ugly. Next.
Mary: Okay so I never specified whether we would be talking about his human or Beast form so this might be off.
OliviaRoseCake: I'm surprised he's this low
Mary: But honestly... hotter as a beast.
OliviaRoseCake: he looks like Fabio and Jesus
Mary: I'm not. I don't find him attractive at all.
OliviaRoseCake: ok Mary
Mary: Jesus is cuter!
OliviaRoseCake: I didn't know you were a Furry
LanaQueen: Mary did I put Adam or The Prince at last? I can't remember if I thought girly and plastic or ugly was worse.
Mary: Prince.
OliviaRoseCake: girly or plastic
OliviaRoseCake: lmao
Mary: I'M NOT A FURRY BUT EVEN IF I WAS AS A CERTAIN USER ON FANPOP ONCE SAID I CAN DO WHAT I WANT TO.
LanaQueen: That sums up the bottom three.
OliviaRoseCake: wow there's a confession
Mary: Also it's Adam's face that's the problem.
OliviaRoseCake: I bet Darby would find him hot
LanaQueen: Yeah his face. It's bad.
OliviaRoseCake: idk seems like something she'd be into
Mary: And hair. Cute eyes I guess though.
OliviaRoseCake: hey his lips are sexy
LanaQueen: Something is so off about it.
OliviaRoseCake: His nose just fucks it up is all
Mary: He does have a nose that's way too big.
LanaQueen: I think it's his nose and eyes and facial structure and forehead.
Mary: #7?
LanaQueen: He makes a much prettier female in those gender bend edits.
Mary: Before we do that, gotta save messages!
OliviaRoseCake: ugh in those genderbends
OliviaRoseCake: he could get some
Mary: YES HE IS SO PRETTY GENDERBENT.
OliviaRoseCake: or I guess she* could get some, my ignorant ass
LanaQueen: Yeah his female version is hot af.

#7, SHANG/JOHN SMITH (TIE!)


Mary: Between Shang and John Smith.
OliviaRoseCake: ok
OliviaRoseCake: wit who
LanaQueen: I hate ties.
OliviaRoseCake: disgusting!
LanaQueen: Let's break the ties: Shang is hotter.
OliviaRoseCake: ties are the worst, I always choke on them
Mary: Don't worry this is the only tie.
LanaQueen: I mean come on, look at those pictures. Shang is hotter.
OliviaRoseCake: ok so Shang is a sexy piece of meat
LanaQueen: See Olivia gets it.
Mary: Shang isn't that hot.
OliviaRoseCake: exactly, Elana gets it
Mary: Sorry I dragged him down y'all.
OliviaRoseCake: omg almost jinx elana
LanaQueen: Mary you're a disgrace.
OliviaRoseCake: dammit Mary
Mary: John Smith the better daddy.
OliviaRoseCake: get yourself some taste, because I'm hungry for Chinese food :D
Mary: I CHOSE A BAD PICTURE OF HIM OKAY.
LanaQueen: I used to think John was hot but I came to my senses. He's not ugly but I hate his hair.
LanaQueen: And his Mel Gibson-ness.
OliviaRoseCake: was that going to far
Mary: I thought I hated his hair but it's kinda hot.
OliviaRoseCake: dammit Mel Gibson!
Mary: If it was I'll edit it out.
LanaQueen: No Chinese food is delicious and so is Shang.
OliviaRoseCake: yassss Elana
OliviaRoseCake: John is too pretty white boi 4 me
LanaQueen: He's Mel Gibson I don't need to say more.
Mary: You got pretty right.
OliviaRoseCake: though his jaw line is impressive
Mary: TAKE THE VOICE AWAY LIKE ARIEL!
OliviaRoseCake: I think Shang was done wrong
LanaQueen: ok. Hate the hair.
OliviaRoseCake: there's no comparison!
LanaQueen: Justice for Shang!
Mary: Sorry babes, onto #6.
OliviaRoseCake: Shang's PECS man
LanaQueen: Look at his body.
LanaQueen: Just look at it.
LanaQueen: It'll change your mind.
Mary: I'm sure John Smith has a hot bod too!
OliviaRoseCake: uh I would cross-dress to get me some of dat

#6, PHILLIP

OliviaRoseCake: hunty
OliviaRoseCake: he's gorgeous
LanaQueen: I guess he's attractive.
OliviaRoseCake: why is he down here among the peasants?
Mary: He's a pretty boy.
LanaQueen: Like, he's definitely not hard to look at.
OliviaRoseCake: he's a cute, he's wife material
LanaQueen: But he's not wowing me.
Mary: I mean, they really stepped up their men animation for this third classic era movie.
LanaQueen: Yeah for sure.
OliviaRoseCake: is it bad that he reminds me of Justin Bieber
Mary: Wife material would imply he's the wife.
LanaQueen: Yes cause you think Phillip is hot.
Mary: Yes it would be bad.
OliviaRoseCake: I mean '
OliviaRoseCake: why not
LanaQueen: And modern JB looks like a homeless man.
OliviaRoseCake: oh true
OliviaRoseCake: just google searched
Mary: Even JB in his peak wasn't that attractive, don't do Phillip dirty!
LanaQueen: Phillip: Wife material.
OliviaRoseCake: yikes he did bad after Selena, huh?
LanaQueen: Selena was always so much hotter.
OliviaRoseCake: Phillip is hot, fight me!
LanaQueen: That girl dodged a bullet!
OliviaRoseCake: ok next
Mary: Apparently he's trying to stay away from Selena because he's bad for her or something but we can talk about that later.
Mary: Okay, #5!
LanaQueen: He's attractive! Just not "fuck me" ya know.

#5, KRISTOFF

Mary
LanaQueen: Hahaha I'm actually shocked he's this high.
LanaQueen: And we said Adam has a big nose.
Mary: I think he's attractive is why.
OliviaRoseCake: another precious boi <3
LanaQueen: I think so too.
Mary: Maybe it's just Jonathan Groff's voice which I love.
OliviaRoseCake: it's his ruggedness
LanaQueen: I'll be a hypocrite for Kristoff. <3
OliviaRoseCake: Jonathan groff is a hottie
OliviaRoseCake: but so is Kristoff
Mary: Our Frozen man! Technically not even a Disney Prince but we're including him anyway.
OliviaRoseCake: so it works
LanaQueen: His face has flaws but it's also perfect.
OliviaRoseCake: I mean love-interest, prince, what's the difference
Mary: He kinda reminds me of the boys I would get crushes on in middle school.
Mary: But like, an adult version.
Mary: Obviously.
OliviaRoseCake: omg that's accurate Mary
OliviaRoseCake: he's like who I had a crush on in elementary but older
LanaQueen: Yeah that's accurate for me too.
OliviaRoseCake: and more
OliviaRoseCake: legal
LanaQueen: maybe my freshman crush is all because of Kristoff.
OliviaRoseCake: I have noticed that 3D boys are more attractive that the 2D boys in general
Mary: Yeah I've thought the same. Maybe because they look more human?
Mary: Anyways, onto #4!
OliviaRoseCake: scientists need to get on this
OliviaRoseCake: but yes yes, no. 4

#4, ALADDIN

OliviaRoseCake: WHAT
LanaQueen: Awww Aladdin should be higher!
OliviaRoseCake: I HAD HIM ALMOST LAST
OliviaRoseCake: this bitch?
LanaQueen: THE FUCK OLIVIA.
Mary: You ranked him third.
Mary: Wait that was me.
LanaQueen: How can you not think Aladdin is attractive.
Mary: You had him at eight! That's not that low.
OliviaRoseCake: what's up with your taste in MEN
OliviaRoseCake: he's a liar!
LanaQueen: Like yes, Aladdin's body is not Shang's.
OliviaRoseCake: but I guess look wise he's not hideous
LanaQueen: But that HaIr and SmiLE.
Mary: Aladdin is just really cute all around!
OliviaRoseCake: but he's like, the guy in the classroom that has a crush on you that you don't like back
OliviaRoseCake: he gives me those vibes
Mary: Key part: had a crush on.
Mary: Oh wait.
Mary: Misread that.
OliviaRoseCake: he eyes brows are so thick
LanaQueen: Aladdin lied cause he's an insecure little bean leave him alone!
Mary: No I wish he had a crush on me.
OliviaRoseCake: his eye are just brown!
OliviaRoseCake: his hair is a mess!
Mary: Even if he's a liar he's still cute, he can lie with me anytime.
LanaQueen: I had a crush on Aladdin growing up and ya'll did too admit it.
OliviaRoseCake: he's homeless for half of the movie!
Mary: STOP BEING RUDE TO HOMELESS PEOPLE.
LanaQueen: Don't judge him for being homeless!
OliviaRoseCake: I think this is the first ranking we really disagree on
LanaQueen: Only judge JB for that.
Mary: AND HE'S REALLY GOOD LOOKING FOR A HOMELESS PERSON! They don't even have access to basic sanitary products!
OliviaRoseCake: WELL AT LEAST DON'T LOOK HOMELESS
OliviaRoseCake: XD I guess you make a good point
LanaQueen: HE DOESN'T LOOK HOMELESS HE LOOKS LIKE MY FUTURE HUSBAND
OliviaRoseCake: still put on a shirt Aladdin, you'll poke someone's eye out
LanaQueen: Also his messy hair is hot.
Mary: ~MAYBE YOUR FUTURE HUSBAND IS HOMELESS~
OliviaRoseCake: actually know that I think about
Mary: You don't know where love will take you.
OliviaRoseCake: where ArE HiS NiPPLeS
LanaQueen: Poke someone's eyes out with what? He has no nipples.
LanaQueen: Lol exactly.
OliviaRoseCake: you knew about this?
OliviaRoseCake: and you didn't tell me?
LanaQueen: You don't deserve to know, Aladdin hater.
OliviaRoseCake: wow ok
OliviaRoseCake: hurt
LanaQueen: You should be.
Mary: Zac Efron or Harry Styles or Nick Jonas or whoever has a third nipple can loan him some.
OliviaRoseCake: XD
Mary: Okay, #3!
OliviaRoseCake: ok next prince, love-interest, person guy
LanaQueen: Wow they all have three nipples?
LanaQueen: Damn you learn something new every day.
LanaQueen: Zac Efron was another childhood crush of mine.

#3, FLYNN

LanaQueen: Hot.
OliviaRoseCake: hot
OliviaRoseCake: jinx ELana!
LanaQueen: Everyone thinks Flynn is hot.
OliviaRoseCake: he's such a hot man
OliviaRoseCake: the smolder, the dashing good looks
LanaQueen: Girls want to marry him. Guys want to be him.
OliviaRoseCake: ugh marry me
OliviaRoseCake: ha Mary, me
Mary: Guys want to be a criminal?
LanaQueen: The floppy hair, the person jawline.
Mary: Also I'm seeing a pattern here. These homeless people really are hot.
LanaQueen: Okay I mean they want to look like him!
OliviaRoseCake: the stubble, but not to much beard action going on
Mary: "ha Mary, me" What did I say?
LanaQueen: Nice maybe I will marry a homeless guy. If they look like the princes sign me up.
Mary: I don't know if I care for how he doesn't have a full beard.
OliviaRoseCake: XD why are bad boys so good-looking!
OliviaRoseCake: dang
Mary: Why are Disney Princes setting unrealistic expectations for homeless people? Discuss.
OliviaRoseCake: honestly
LanaQueen: That'll be my next school research paper.
OliviaRoseCake: Why Disney sets unrealistic expectations is not a new topic
OliviaRoseCake: F+
LanaQueen: Disney princes set an unrealistic exception for future husbands and homeless people and I feel personally attacked by it. In this essay I will-
Mary: For homeless people it is. A+ for innovation.
LanaQueen: expectation* I can't type today.
Mary: Alright, #2. Not a homeless person.

#2, NAVEEN

LanaQueen: WHAT
LanaQueen: HE'S NOT NUMBER ONE
LanaQueen: HOW
LanaQueen: HOW
LanaQueen: HOW
OliviaRoseCake: He's hot
LanaQueen: HE'S SO HOT
LanaQueen: NOOOOO
LanaQueen: THIS IS WRONG.
OliviaRoseCake: what'd you expect?
Mary: Sorry Elana you got babed out. Olivia had someone else as #1!
LanaQueen: THIS IS ALL WRONG.
OliviaRoseCake: ITS NOT WRONG
LanaQueen: I DEMAND A RECOUNT.
OliviaRoseCake: THIS HAS NEVER FELT MORE RIGHT
LanaQueen: HE IS NUMBER ONE MATERIAL
OliviaRoseCake: Naveen could just get all the pussy
Mary: I wonder if the ranking would be different if Darby was here.
OliviaRoseCake: If he tried
OliviaRoseCake: he just has it
LanaQueen: Perfect smile, perfect skin, perfect hair, perfect PERFECT.
Mary: I mean he is still really hot.
OliviaRoseCake: Tiana is a lucky woman
LanaQueen: Darby would agree with me!
LanaQueen: Tiana and Naveen's kids would be soooo attractive.
OliviaRoseCake: this shouldn't be surprising Elana we all said he and Tiana were like the hottest couple on our last article
OliviaRoseCake: or the article before last
Mary: Not in terms of personality. Even in a sexual context, he would probably forget to give her an orgasm!
LanaQueen: Yeah that's why it's surprising Naveen isn't number one.
OliviaRoseCake: Darby probs loves Naveen’s caramel ass just as much as we do
Mary: But yeah Tiana and Naveen's family would be hot.
LanaQueen: Damn Naveen is selfish in bed?
Mary: Caramel?
Mary: He totally would be!
LanaQueen: I hope not.
OliviaRoseCake: god damnit
LanaQueen: He'd be the first prince I'd sleep with.
OliviaRoseCake: ok, so we’re discussing disney characters and how they perform in bed now
LanaQueen: Flynn and Aladdin can join I guess.
LanaQueen: This site is 13+ okay.
Mary: It's a totally acceptable subject. You're lucky the pictures I'm using aren't the fake nudes.
OliviaRoseCake: I personally think Flynn would make a mess out of me
OliviaRoseCake: but to each his own
Mary: It's 16+ now! Which is the legal age of consent in 33 states.
OliviaRoseCake: wow you've researched this
OliviaRoseCake: I see you Mary
LanaQueen: The DP site did a whole countdown about prince packages this is okay.
Mary: Flynn needs a home first. I'm not doing anything in Rapunzel's tower.
LanaQueen: 16 damn. My state is 18.
OliviaRoseCake: maybe our next article should be best princely package
Mary: Mine is 16!
OliviaRoseCake: my state is 17
Mary: Watch it get deleted.
Mary: Okay off topic.
LanaQueen: Wait maybe mine is 17.
OliviaRoseCake: XD
Mary: NUMBER ONE!!!!
OliviaRoseCake: flagged for inappropriate behavior
LanaQueen: It is 17!
LanaQueen: I didn't know this.
OliviaRoseCake: Mary
OliviaRoseCake: contact the authorities

#1, ERIC

Mary: Elana is outraged.
LanaQueen: I'm only outraged because Naveen deserved this!
Mary: Trump's America.
LanaQueen: But I still put Eric pretty high. Number four I think.
OliviaRoseCake: I mean
Mary: Yeah you did.
OliviaRoseCake: why complain
LanaQueen: Trying to make America white again...
OliviaRoseCake: he is the complete package
Mary: Come on he's really cute.
OliviaRoseCake: and his package appear huge!
OliviaRoseCake: how is Ariel's fish vagina gonna handle that
Mary: I would let him destroy me.
LanaQueen: Wow does it really.
OliviaRoseCake: wow Mary strong feelings
Mary: Not sure whether we'll keep the sexual stuff for the final article or not.
OliviaRoseCake: his face is perfect
LanaQueen: I love his jawline.
OliviaRoseCake: blue eyes, strong jawline, dimples
Mary: His eyebrows are a bit thick but other than that, beautiful!
LanaQueen: And his eye color because duh blue eyes.
OliviaRoseCake: and he has the old Hollywood feel without being to Ken doll-ish
LanaQueen: I love thick eyebrows.
OliviaRoseCake: his nose is perfect
OliviaRoseCake: I bet he's ripped!
LanaQueen: He's actually just Prince Charming if not a Ken doll.
Mary: Ugh I wanna get in his kingdom.
OliviaRoseCake: he looks so dreamy
OliviaRoseCake: I want to be apart of that world
LanaQueen: I want to be part of his world.
LanaQueen: Dammit Liv.
Mary: He's kinda like Charming but add a super hot factor.
LanaQueen: I knew making the most obvious joke would backfire.
OliviaRoseCake: ya know I hate on Ariel a lot, but I'd leave my dad, change my body, and sell my voice for a piece of dat ass
LanaQueen: Okay but let's talk about the cons now:
LanaQueen: 1. Not Naveen.
LanaQueen: Fin.
Mary: Okay, I'm adding all of this to the article and we are done (sort of because this is only like half of the actual process).
Mary: I think I'll put all of our individual lists in the article this time for anybody curious.

Our individual lists, in case you care or want to see who has the best/worse taste!

Elana’s:
1. Naveen
2. Flynn
3. Aladdin
4. Eric
5. Shang
6. Kristoff
7. Phillip
8. John Smith
9. Prince Charming
10. Beast
11. The Prince

Olivia’s:
1. Eric
2. Naveen
3. Flynn
4. Phillip
5. Adam
6. Shang
7. Kristoff
8. Aladdin
9. John Smith
10. Charming
11. Prince

Mary’s:
1. Eric
2. Kristoff
3. Aladdin
4. Naveen
5. John Smith
6. Flynn
7. Philip
8. Charming
9. Prince
10. Beast
11. Shang