Write an Article

Disney Opinion Article

Disney Villains' lies

Opinion by Pyjamarama posted over a year ago
fan of it?
save
Fifteen.

Fifteen puppies!







How marvellous.







How marvellous,

how perfectly... ugh!







The devil take it.

They're mongrels... no spots!







No spots at all.

What a horrid little white rat.







They're not mongrels!







They'll get their spots.

Just wait and see.







That's right. They'll have

their spots in a few weeks.







Oh, well, in that case I'll

take them all. The whole litter.







Just name your price, dear.







I'm afraid

we can't give them up.







- Poor Perdita, she'd be heartbroken.

- Anita, don't be ridiculous.







You can't afford to keep them.

You can scarcely feed yourselves.







I'm sure

we'll get along.







Yes, I know. I know!







Roger's...

Roger's songs!







Enough of this nonsense. I'll pay you

twice what they're worth.







I'm being

more than generous.







Blast this pen.







Blast this wretched,

wretched pen!







When can the puppies

leave their mother?







Two weeks?

Three weeks?







Never.







- What?

- We're not selling the puppies.







Not a single one.

Do you understand?







Anita, is he serious?







I really

don't know Roger.







- Cruella, he...

- Surely he must be joking!







No, no, no.

I mean it.







You're not getting one.

Not one.







And that's... final.







Why, you horrid man!







You... you...







All right, keep the little

beasts for all I care.







Do as you like with them.

Drown them!







But I warn you, Anita,

I'm through with all of you!







I'll get even.

Just wait.







You'll be sorry,

you fools!







You... you idiots!



Ursula: Poor little princess - it's not you I'm after. I've a much bigger fish

to -

Triton: Ursula, stop!

Ursula: Why, King Triton! Ha ha ha - How ARE you?

Triton: Let her go.

Ursula: Not a chance, Triton! She's mine now. We made a deal.

Ariel: Daddy, I'm sorry! I - I - I didn't mean to. I didn't know -

(Triton attacks the contract with a fierce blast from his trident, to no

avail.)

Ursula: You see? The contract's legal, binding and completely unbreakable -

even for YOU. Of course, I always was a girl with an eye for a bargain.

The daughter of the great sea king is a very precious commodity. But - I

might be willing to make an exchange for someone even better. . . .

JASMINE: Jafar?
JAFAR: Oh, uh, princess.
IAGO: Awk! Jafar, I'm stuck!
JAFAR: How may I be of service to you? (He spreads out his
cape, hiding the door.)
JASMINE: The guards just took a boy from the market, on your
orders.
JAFAR: Your father's charged me with keeping peace in
Agrabah. The boy was a criminal.
JASMINE: What was the crime?
IAGO: I can't breathe, Jafar!
JAFAR: Why, kidnapping the princess, of course.
IAGO: If you could just--(JAFAR kicks him back inside the
door and it slams shut)--wow, that hurt!
JASMINE: He didn't kidnap me! I ran away!
JAFAR: (Walking away as if shocked) Oh, dear! Oh, why
frightfully upsetting. Had I but known.
JASMINE: What do you mean?
JAFAR: Sadly, the boy's sentence has already been carried
out.
JASMINE: What sentence?
JAFAR: (with a sinister tone) Death. (JASMINE gasps.)
By beheading.
JASMINE: No! (She collapses to the floor.)
JAFAR: I am exceedingly sorry, princess.
JASMINE: How could you? (She runs from the room crying.)

(IAGO finally makes it out through the door. He flies up and lands on
JAFAR's shoulder, coughing.)

IAGO: So, how did it go?
JAFAR: I think she took it rather well. (They both get a
sinister smile on their faces.)

Simba: Hey Uncle Scar! Guess what!
Scar: I despise guessing games.
Simba: I'm going to be king of Pride Rock.
Scar: {Sarcastically} Oh goody.
Simba: {Looking out over the edge of the rock} My dad just showed me the whole kingdom; {greedily} and I'm going to rule it all. Heh heh.
Scar: Yes. Well... forgive me for not leaping for joy. Bad back, you know.


{Scar flops down on his side.}

Simba: Hey, Uncle Scar? When I'm king, what'll that make you?
Scar: A monkey's uncle.
Simba: Heh heh. You're so weird.
Scar: You have NO idea. ...So, your father showed you the whole kingdom, did he?
Simba: Everything.
Scar: He didn't show you what's beyond that rise at the northern border...?
Simba: {Disappointed} Well, no... he said I can't go there.
Scar: And he's absolutely right. It's far too dangerous. Only the bravest lions go there.
Simba: Well, I'm brave! What's out th--
Scar: {Interrupting} No, I'm sorry, Simba, I just can't tell you.
Simba: Why not?
Scar: Simba, Simba, I'm only looking out for the well- being of my favorite nephew.


{Scar rubs and pats Simba's head}

Simba: {Snorts sarcastically} Yeah, right, I'm your only nephew.
Scar: All the more reason for me to be protective... An elephant graveyard is no place for a young prince... {faking surprise} Oops!
Simba: {Enthusiastic} An elephant what? Whoa.
Scar: {Faking dismay} Oh dear, I've said too much... Well, I suppose you'd have found sooner or later, you being SO clever and all... {pulling Simba near} Oh, just do me one favor - promise me you'll never visit that dreadful place.
Simba: {Thinks} No problem.
Scar: There's a good lad. You run along now and have fun. And remember... it's our little secret.

Staywhereyou are!

- Please, go right ahead.







Run me through.

You'll be doing me a favor.







All right. I give up.







What's your problem?







All I've everwanted was to get away

from this dreadful place...







and home to my dear,

sweet mother.







But blast it all!

Peter stole my treasure...







and my men would mutiny ifI so much

as tried to leave without it.







So here I am...







stuck in this absurd place.







My sources tell me...







you wish

to return home as well.







Huh. You got that right.







- I guess we're in the same boat.

- The same boat!







- That's it!

- Wh-What's it?







I'll giveyou

passage home on my ship...







and you can help me

recover my treasure.







Uh, don'tyou see?

The treasure's useless to Peter.







He's not sensible

likeyou and I.







He'sjust a boy

who'll never grow up.







Hmm. Tell me about it.







And, really,

what other choice doyou have?







It's not as though

you could fly home.







Hmm, well, I suppose.







Ifit is rightfullyyours.







And ifit's really

no use to Peter--







Splendid, splendid!







Wait! You must swear

not to harm Peter.







Me? Actually harm Peter Pan?

Perish the thought!







It's all a game, you see.







I shan't harm him.

You have myword.







''I, CaptainJames Hook,

do hereby swear...







not to harm a single hair

on Peter Pan's head.''







You see?

Ironclad, unbreakable.







Leave the light on, Mommy.

Your baby boy's coming home.







Now, when you've

located the treasure...







just give this a wee toot.







You're doing the right thing,

my dear.







I'm your onlyway home.




Share this article with others!

Around the Web

0 comments