Dr. Spencer Reid Best Reid quotes/comments

Solsikke posted on Aug 02, 2009 at 07:29AM
What is your favorite quote/comment that our genius Reid have sad?
Must be something, cause he says a lot of funny stuff!!

Dr. Spencer Reid 75 replies

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over a year ago Solsikke said…
Derek Morgan: And remember, play into the guy's fantasy, believe it yourself.
Dr. Spencer Reid: Actually, did you know that dentists and surgeons have been secretly recruited to implant these during otherwise normal medical procedures? This has been happening on and off since the late 1930s.
[Morgan looks at him]
Dr. Spencer Reid: Told me to believe.

Elle Greenaway: Um, Reid, you probably saved my life in there.
Dr. Spencer Reid: Probably? I totally saved your life.
[he smiles]
Dr. Spencer Reid: And I'm pretty certain it was caught on tape.

Dr. Spencer Reid: You should see what comes up when you type "death" into a search engine.
Derek Morgan: No wonder you can't find a date.

Derek Morgan: I hate not having a plan. We're looking for a needle in a haystack.
Dr. Spencer Reid: Actually, it's more like we're looking for a needle in a pile of needles.
Derek Morgan: What?
Dr. Spencer Reid: A needle would stand out in a haystack.

Dr. Spencer Reid: Do you think it's weird that I knew that ballad?
Elle Greenaway: Reid, I don't know how you know half the stuff you know, but I'm glad you do.
Dr. Spencer Reid: Do you think that's why I can't get a date?
Elle Greenaway: Have you ever asked anyone?
[Reid shifts his eyes]
Elle Greenaway: That's why you can't get a date.

[referring to Gideon]
Dr. Spencer Reid: Why does he call me Dr. Reid?
Aaron "Hotch" Hotchner: Because they just see you as a kid. He wants them to treat you with respect.

Derek Morgan: Reid, are you good with this? We've got a woman who's only got a few hours left to live, an incomplete profile and a Unit Chief on the verge of a nervous breakdown.
[Gideon comes in from behind him]
Jason Gideon: They don't call them nervous breakdowns anymore.
Dr. Spencer Reid: It's called a "Major Depressive Episode."
Derek Morgan: I know!

Jason Gideon: Try again. Fail again. Fail better.
Dr. Spencer Reid: Samuel Beckett.
Derek Morgan: Try not. Do or do not.
Dr. Spencer Reid: Yoda.

Aaron "Hotch" Hotchner: This is Special Agent Dr. Reid.
FBI Student: Oh, you look too young to have gone to medical school.
Dr. Spencer Reid: They are Ph.D.'s, three of them.
FBI Student: What, are you a genius or something?
Dr. Spencer Reid: I don't believe that intelligence can be accurately quantified, but I do have an IQ of 187, an eidetic memory, can read 20,000 words per minute.
Dr. Spencer Reid: Yes, I'm a genius.
over a year ago momo0231 said…
your 3rd is my favorite! of course i would definetly date Reid so Morgan is a tiny bit wrong ;)
over a year ago Solsikke said…
Totaly agree! :P
Morgan is soooo wrong!
over a year ago Buffyfan92 said…
big smile
Some of my favs that you don't have on your list;) :

"It has been said that time heals all wounds. I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue, and the pain lessens, but it is never gone."

Reid: I don't know everything. I mean, despite the fact that you think I do.
Morgan: I never said that. When have I ever said that?
Reid: Every day since I met you.
Elle: This morning at breakfast.
Hotchner: Yesterday when he beat you at cards.

Morgan: Yeah Reid, why are you still afraid of the dark?
Reid: Because of the inherent absence of light

Derek Morgan: So tell me, what does keep young Dr. Reid awake at night? Wait, let me guess. Memorizing some obscure textbook? No, no, no. Working on cold fusion? No, I got it, I got it, I got it. Watching Star Trek and laughing at all the physics mistakes?
Dr. Spencer Reid: Actually, there aren't that many scientific errors in Star Trek, especially considering how long ago it was made. There are certain improbabilities, but not that many outright errors.
Derek Morgan: Right.

Lila Archer: Really, Spencer, you should live a little.
Reid: Live a little? I've known you for forty-eight hours and I feel like I've aged ten years!

Reid: Are you hacking into the government HMO database? Is that legal?
Garcia: Of course not. We'll go to prison and you'll become someone's bitch.
Reid: Really?

Reid: I was a twelve year old prodigy in a high school. Hotch, you kick like a nine year-old girl.

Reid: "I'm about to get naked, so they can scrub me down. Is that something you really wanna see?"

Reid: "I never have any normal fans."

Mr. Davenport: Excuse me c-can you actually read that fast?
Reid: Our conscious mind can process 16 bits of information per second, our unconscious however can process 11 million.
Reid: Yes, I, I really can read this fast.

Hotchner: Physics magic?
Reid: Yes, sir.
Hotchner: Reid, we talked about this.
Reid: I'm sorry, sir.
Hotchner: You're really starting to get some distance on these things.

Reid: It’s just like when Morgan freaked out in the elevator.
Morgan: I freaked?
Reid: That’s beside the point.

Reid: Statistically, 94% of all serial arsonists are male, 75% are white and few, if any, are ever caught.
Prentiss: Few? You don’t have a percentage?
Reid: 16%. Those 16% set 30 plus fires before they’re ever apprehended. I’m trying to be more conversational.
Prentiss: Oh. It’s not working.

JJ: He's so gorgeous.
Haley Hotchner: Thank you.
Reid: If you find baldness and wrinkles attractive.

Reid: (discussing chopsticks) It’s absolutely incredible, 1.3 billion people stay nourished because of these things.

Reid: Don't listen to him Garcia, he's all talk.

Reid: You should have listened to me.
Morgan: It wouldn't have saved that much time, Reid, let it go.
Reid: The interchange between the 405 and the 101 freeways is consistently rated the worst interchange in the entire world.
Morgan: Why do you know that?
Reid: The government report.
Morgan: So what?
Reid: So you work for the government, you don't read the reports?
Morgan: On traffic patterns in a city 2,500 miles from where I live?
Reid: 2,295 miles.
Morgan: Don't make me smack you in front of all these people.

Okay that was a lot! But he says so many awesome things;D
over a year ago SRBFF said…
big smile
omg i LOVE this!!! its already been said th ough
Reid: (discussing chopsticks) It’s absolutely incredible, 1.3 billion people stay nourished because of these things.

then there is

Reid:(holding 2 chopsticks) Its like eating with 2 number 2 pencils

OMG i LOVE him!!! like a bff or brother......:)
over a year ago reidlover247 said…
I love everything he says!!! he is just so adorable!
over a year ago ncisfan001 said…
omg reid is amazing!! Another few favorites i didn't see up there are:

Reid: Colon?
JJ: Cullen. The last name of the vampire family in Twilight.
Reid: What's Twilight?

Reid: Knowledge of law enforcement does suggest a criminal record.
Morgan: Or that he watches television.

Garcia: Reid, seriously, people that go inside that
house never come out. Spoooky.
Reid: Garcia, could you at least pretend not to enjoy
that rumor so much since I have actually entered that

Hotch:"You told me you were clear to travel, you lied"
Prentiss:"Naughty boy"
Reid:"No I didn't, I am a doctor so technically it wasn't a lie"
Garcia:"What was it then?"
Reid:"Amm...second opinion"
Garcia:"You're my bitch now"

JJ: If anything should happen to us, it's up to you and Garcia to make sure that this boy gets into Yale.

Reid: Oh Yale, Yale. Do you want to go to Yale, Henry? That was your Godfather's safety school. Don't worry, I can get you into Caltech with one phone call.

Reid: Sorry I'm late.
Rossi: I hope she was worth it.
Morgan: I hope it was a she.
over a year ago lovedrreid said…
"Between the idea and the reality, between the motion and the act, falls the shadow." T.S. Elliot (Sex, Birth, Death) that was a sad episode!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
over a year ago lovedrreid said…
My motto is: "If you don't like Reid, I don't like you!"
over a year ago lovedrreid said…
Emily: What's the matter with you.
Reid: What do you mean what's the matter with me?
Emily: I've never seen you act this way.
Reid: Oh, really, in the months that you've known me, you've never seen me act this way? No offense, Emily, you don't really know what you're talking about, do you?

over a year ago lovedrreid said…
hope you like this picture i made for th quote from sex birth death by ts eliot
hope you like this picture i made for th quote from sex birth death by ts eliot
over a year ago Paramore-CSI said…
I'm about to get naked, so they can scrub me down. Is that something you really wanna see?"
buffy fan I love this one and If I was there I wouldve said hell yeah!
over a year ago reidstalker777 said…

Reid: A psycho with a whistle. That's not wierd...

Reid: Can you guys do me a favor
 Others: Yeah?
 Reid: Can at least one of you look like you're going to see me again?
 Hauchner: Bye, Reid. See you when you get back.
Reid: *adresses psycho's imaginary friend* Why don't you let him make his own decisions?
 Psycho: You can see him?
 Reid: Yeah, he's right there.

JJ: No matter what happens this time, we don't split up, clear?
Reid: Crystal clear.
over a year ago reidstalker777 said…
I love Reid!!!
over a year ago alicecullenrox1 said…
big smile
Jason Gideon: You havin' fun?
Dr. Spencer Reid: [dully] Yes. Definately. I'm definately having fun.
Jason Gideon: Make a wish?
Dr. Spencer Reid: Can I take this hat off?
Jason Gideon: I wouldn't.
Jennifer "JJ" Jareau: Hey, Spence. First piece for the birthday boy.
Dr. Spencer Reid: [to Gideon] Do you know she's the only person in the whole world who calls me 'Spence.'

Derek Morgan: I hate not having a plan. We're looking for a needle in a haystack.
Dr. Spencer Reid: Actually, it's more like we're looking for a needle in a pile of needles.
Derek Morgan: What?
Dr. Spencer Reid: A needle would stand out in a haystack.

Dr. Spencer Reid: Look at me. Without a gun I look like a teacher's assistant!

Dr. Spencer Reid: Melted wax?
Jennifer "JJ" Jareau: Candle wax?
Dr. Spencer Reid: Candles are used in rituals.
Jason Gideon: They're also used on birthday cakes.
Dr. Spencer Reid: Actually, they were originally used to protect the birthday celebrant from demons for the coming year. As a matter of fact, down to the fourth century, Christianity rejected the birthday celebration as a Pagan ritual.
Sheriff Bridges: What kind of a doctor are you?

[Dr Reid has found steganographic messages hidden in letters written by a convict in prison but can't read the messages without the key]
David Rossi: What do you need to crack it?
Dr. Spencer Reid: The ability to clone myself and a year's supply of Adderall.
David Rossi: I'll put on the coffee.
over a year ago allyxx said…
omg i love reid sooo much soooo cute and single... lol love yu people for makin this page i have never met another dr reid obsessed person b4 and im glad t no im not the only one XD sadly, only one of us can marry him lol haha do you know i have a notebook with every single quote and victim and murderer/rapist/arsonist name and the name of the people who said the quotes and who actually wrote them and the name number and series of the episode OBSESSION NEVER ENDS!! xd
over a year ago allyxx said…
ps people of criminal minds and reid and morgan lovers did yu know that there is actually a picture of derek morgan standing completely naked on a gay beach????? nooo why is it always the hot ones..
over a year ago allyxx said…
hey heres sum more funny quotes ...[to Elle]
Jason Gideon: You're all right?
Elle Greenaway: Yeah, I'm fine, Dad.
Jason Gideon: Elle?
Elle Greenaway: Yeah?
Jason Gideon: Don't ever call me "Dad" again.
[he walks away]
Elle Greenaway: How do you think he'd feel about Mom?
Dr. Spencer Reid: Let me know when you're going to do that so I can, uh, run.

Lila Archer: [Lila takes a sip of Reid's soda] You don't mind sharing with me, do you?
Dr. Spencer Reid: No.
[Lila takes off her robe. She is wearing a bikini underneath. Reid stares at her as she walks away]
Derek Morgan: You don't mind sharing with me, do you?
Dr. Spencer Reid: Shut up!

Dr. Spencer Reid: Think about who shares the exact DNA makeup of another person.
Derek Morgan: Read, you're not seriously floating around the idea of an evil twin, are you?
Dr. Spencer Reid: No, I'm not. I'm floating the idea of an *eviler* twin.

Penelope Garcia: [to Hotch via webcam with Reid] I got something that might help us with that...
Dr. Spencer Reid: Technically *we* have something that might help us with that.

Dr. Spencer Reid: [to Prentiss via webcam with Garcia] Anything less than 10,000 dollars keeps the IRS off your trail.
Penelope Garcia: [desperately] I know that too.


"Criminal Minds: Memoriam (#4.7)" (2008)
Dr. Spencer Reid: [walks into his hotel room with a box, surprised to see Rossi and Morgan there] What are you guys doing here?
Derek Morgan: Hey. What's it look like we're doing?
Dr. Spencer Reid: Uh, breaking into my room and watching Days of Our Lives.
David Rossi: The Young and the Restless.

Dr. Spencer Reid: I'm with the FBI.
Trailer Park Manager: FBI? You're not serious. You look like a pipe-cleaner with eyes. I could snap you like a twig.


"Criminal Minds: Faceless, Nameless (#5.1)" (2009)
Penelope Garcia: [to Reid on the phone] Okay, do you want biological information or full medical charts?
Dr. Spencer Reid: Can you *get* the full medical charts?
Penelope Garcia: You know for a smart boy you still ask a lot of *dumb* questions.


"Criminal Minds: The Big Wheel (#4.22)" (2009)
Emily Prentiss: [in the investigation room; looking at Reid] What's missing from the Michelle Watson murder is any sign of rage or overkill.
Dr. Spencer Reid: Yeah, instead on the tape we see signs of remorse. A complete and sudden emotional change. It's absolutely fascinating.
Penelope Garcia: [walking over to Prentiss, looking at Reid] I love you, Reid, but the stuff you find fascinating is sad.

sooo more of mi fav quotes!! leave a comment! xx
over a year ago riedgirl200 said…
big smile
i love everything he says he is a genius.
over a year ago ally064 said…
my favorite is

Lila Archer: [Lila takes a sip of Reid's soda] You don't mind sharing with me, do you?
Dr. Spencer Reid: No.
[Lila takes off her robe. She is wearing a bikini underneath. Reid stares at her as she walks away]
Derek Morgan: You don't mind sharing with me, do you?
Dr. Spencer Reid: Shut up!

over a year ago KittyBytes said…
Reid: "I'm about to get naked, so they can scrub me down. Is that something you really wanna see?"
Me: YES!

I like this one: My mother's a paranoid schizophrenic who would forget to eat if she wasn't properly medicated and supervised.
over a year ago NotGivingUp said…
I'm so glad someone made this page! i've found so mnay quotes that i love! reid is so adorable! i'm glad that other people feel the same way about him too! REID ROCKS!!!!
over a year ago NotGivingUp said…
wait. where is a place where you can watch free and full episodes of criminal minds? every website i've been too cuts off the episodes halfway :(
over a year ago spencerreid97 said…
Reid; What's that?
Prentiss: It's a star puzzle. It's impossible to put together. There's actually a romantic tale behind it. There was this prince who loved this princess and he wanted to show her how much he loved her. So he caught a falling star, but he was so excited he dropped it, and it broke into all those little peices. He frantically put the pieces back together to show him his undying love for her.
Reid: That makes no sense. You can't catch a falling star, it would burn up in the atmospere.
Prentiss: Well, it's a fable. It doesn't have to make sense.
Reid: But fables have morals, that didn't have a moral.
Prentiss: Ok, well it's just a little romantic tale. The point is that the puzzle is impossible....
Reid: (put the puzzle back together in a few seconds)
Prentiss: There's alot to hate about you Docter Reid.

Dr. Spencer Reid: Hey, Morgan? Has there ever been a girl that you wanted to be with for, you know, more than just one night?
Derek Morgan: Excuse me?
Dr. Spencer Reid: I've never seen you with the same girl twice.
Derek Morgan: What, are you calling me a dog?
Dr. Spencer Reid: No, no, not at all. I'm just trying to figure out if this feeling I have is ever gonna go away

Derek Morgan: Easy there tough guy. Have some coffee with your sugar.
Dr. Spencer Reid: I need something to wake me up.
Derek Morgan: Ooh, late night?
Dr. Spencer Reid: Very.
Derek Morgan: My man!
Dr. Spencer Reid: Not that kind of late night!

Derek Morgan: [trying to help Reid learn how to pick up women] What makes you feel confident?
Dr. Spencer Reid: Statistics.
Derek Morgan: No

Dr. Spencer Reid: [wakes up in hospital] Are you eating jello?
Derek Morgan: Hey kid.
[to the hallway]
Derek Morgan: Hey, Doc. He's awake.
Dr. Spencer Reid: [to Morgan] Is there any *more* jello?

Dr. Spencer Reid: Do you mind if we swing by a book store, I want to re-read Empty Planet before we meet with the author, I haven't read it since I was six.
Derek Morgan: Six? I was still riding my big wheeler at six!
Derek Morgan: Do you mind, it'll only take ten minutes.
Jason Gideon: Do buy it or to read it?
Dr. Spencer Reid: Uh both actually.

Dr. Spencer Reid: [Looking through glass at Professor Rothchild] I never have any normal fans.

over a year ago salsasoccer27 said…
i like it in the episode where him and hotch were talking to an old criminal and when the guy is getting ready to kill hotch hey speaks up from the corner and says "i know why you killed those people" then he starts talking about statistics and stuff, ending with, the criminal is kinda fascinated so he listens,reid ends with "so it wasn't really them who necer had a chance, it was you" then the police come and handcuff him. before the criminal asks, "is that true, i never really had a chance?" reid, keeping his head down and walking quickly out says "i dunno, maybe" it was soooo funny and he was ausome on the episode. it sounds weird when i type it, though.

also " i know what its like to be afraid of your own minds" awsome quote