When i woke up it was morning, or at least i thought it was. I rolled over to find mascara stains all over my white pillow. I suddenly remembered myself crying myself to sleep last night. I looked up to the side where Rory sleeps, he wasn't there. Where was he? He was probably talking to the Doctor. The Doctor, how could i face him since last night. In fact how can i face any of them since last night? I knew i had to face them some time. So i wen't for a shower, got dressed and i made my way down the coridor.
As i walked quietly down the coridoor, i heard Rory and the Doctor talking about something. They didn't know i was there. They were talking about me. I panicked, what if Rory knew what had happened last night and he never confronted me? He's done that before, he didn't confront me over that kiss me and the Doctor shared the night before my wedding. I leaned my back against the wall, hiding from them so i could know what they were saying, i listened quietly...
"Please just be quiet Rory i'm busy over here" the Doctor said
"But why was she crying though?" Rory asked looking at him.
"I don't know Rory" the Doctor whispered back.
"But it wasn't just for 10 minutes or anything like that, she cried herself to sleep. I-i don't think i've done anything have i?" Rory asked
The Doctor stopped fidgeting about with the control panel, he raised his head to look at Rory. Rory looked at him...
"Unless...you've done something to upset her" Rory suggested
Then suddenly Rory's face started to turn angry...
"Did you do anything to make her upset?" Rory asked
"Me? no! no! how could you think that?" the Doctor asked surprisingly...
I walked down the coridoor acting as if i didn't hear a word. They turned to me sharply, i pulled a confused face...
"Why are you both staring at me like that? i asked
"Nothing, nothing" Rory replied looking at me up and down...
Rory and I both looked at the Doctor , he looked at us both smiling. Smiling? why would he be smiling
"I think it's time we go on another little adventure" he said
I didn't want to go on an adventure, not after last night. How could i possibly explore new galaxies and planets with my husband who i cheated on only last night? I knew the Doctor wanted to see me happy, he loves it when i smile and i smile because he makes me smile. I love Rory I do, I feel terrible what i've done to him. I don't know who i love more, I can't choose? How can i possibly choose? I waited my whole life for this one man and when he leaves you for twelve years you need someone to open up to, to cry onto and someone who's there for you when he's not. That was Rory, i never meant to fall in love with Rory,we were best friends, me, Jeff, Kirsty and Rory. I knew he wanted to be more, the way he looked at me. I gave up and settled down with the fact that he wasn't coming back. I let myself fall in love with Rory. Then that one day it all changed.....
The day he came back, my raggedy doctor came back. That noise from that glorious time machine the ringing that was in my ears every night as i fell asleep. And when he found out who i was and how late he was for me, he looked into my eyes, those eyes that i looked into from when i was seven years old, the eyes that i look at now and see nothing but love and desire. The way he holds me, hugs me and kisses me. It makes me feel complete, the years i've been waiting, the stories i told about him and the drawings in my scrapbook it's sounds like something out of a fairytale...
Then reality hit....
"Where did you have in mind?" I asked
"Im thinking Zyronth"
"Hhhmmm i was thinking breakfast!" i hissed
The Doctor sighed as i walked through to the kitchen rumaging through the cupboards looking for some cereal to eat. Rory left the Doctor in the concole room and joined me in the kitchen...
"Alright what's going on?" Rory asked me
"What do you mean?" i asked as i found the cereal and started opening the box....
"Something or someone made you upset last night Amy" Rory said
I didn't want to look at him i was so busy trying to open the paket, he took the box off of me and opened it for me...
"Upset?" i asked pouring the cereal out into a bowl...
"Amy will you just look at me" Rory hissed
I sighed and put down the bowl, and looked up at Rory's face. He looked scared in a way, maybe he was scared of the fact that someone hurt me...
"What is it?" he asked
"Amy?"
"Rory it's nothing..." i said placing my hands on his cheeks and looking into his eyes "Honestly" i whispered
He stood still as i walked away slowly shuting my eyes tight wishing i didn't just lie to him. I joined the Doctor back in the console room. He was busy pulling the levers and fidgeting about with the screen....
"Did you have something to eat?" the Doctor asked me
"I lost my apetite" i whispered as i walked to my room.....
The Doctor looked at me as it turned my back to him too. Rory walked back through to the console room after i left.
"I just want to know whats wrong with her" Rory said to the Doctor
"Im sure it's nothing" the Doctor said
"I know but i just worry about her you know?" Rory sighed
The Doctor felt terrible,Rory was his friend and now he's going about kissing his wife in the middle of the night while he's asleep in bed dreaming about me.
Hours passed, the Doctor wondered around the rooms he found Rory asleep in the library's chair, he had a book in his lap. The Doctor closed the door back over. He planned to go back to his bedroom for a sleep. Then as he passed my bedroom he heard sobs from it. He couldn't leave me there crying, it hurt him when i cried. He slowly opened the door, he found me on my bed lying on my side, crying into a pillow causing more mascara stained all over it.
"Amy" he whispered
"Just go away!" i hissed
"I can't do this anymore" i whispered
"Am-"
"It's not even been a day and i feel horrible, how else am i supposed to cope every other day of my life?"
"Amy listen-"
"No you listen!" i hissed cuting him off jumping up onto my feet saying it inches from his face...
"Keep your voice down" the Doctor hissed
I then remembered Rory was asleep down the hall in the library, he came in to check on me earlier i pretended i was asleep just so he wouldn't speak to me...
"We kissed last night remember!"
"I love you and you love me"
"I know, i know" he whispered as he kissed me softly on the forehead as i cried.
Im sure he was crying a tad too, he wrapped his arms around me and whispered, "Pond what am i going to do with you?"
"But i love Rory too i just don't know what to do"
"This isn't how it's supposed to be, it's just not fair" i whispered as i crawled back onto my bed to lie down..."It's just not fair"
"We need to tell him"
"I know, I know" he said
"But what am i supposed to say? Im sorry Rory but i'm in love with someone else, i want a divorce although we just got married?" i sighed
"I don't know if i can" i said
That night as we talked and cried about how we were going to tell Rory about all of this...we didn't know Rory wasn't asleep at all, he was actually standing out in the hallway and he heard everything......
As i walked quietly down the coridoor, i heard Rory and the Doctor talking about something. They didn't know i was there. They were talking about me. I panicked, what if Rory knew what had happened last night and he never confronted me? He's done that before, he didn't confront me over that kiss me and the Doctor shared the night before my wedding. I leaned my back against the wall, hiding from them so i could know what they were saying, i listened quietly...
"Please just be quiet Rory i'm busy over here" the Doctor said
"But why was she crying though?" Rory asked looking at him.
"I don't know Rory" the Doctor whispered back.
"But it wasn't just for 10 minutes or anything like that, she cried herself to sleep. I-i don't think i've done anything have i?" Rory asked
The Doctor stopped fidgeting about with the control panel, he raised his head to look at Rory. Rory looked at him...
"Unless...you've done something to upset her" Rory suggested
Then suddenly Rory's face started to turn angry...
"Did you do anything to make her upset?" Rory asked
"Me? no! no! how could you think that?" the Doctor asked surprisingly...
I walked down the coridoor acting as if i didn't hear a word. They turned to me sharply, i pulled a confused face...
"Why are you both staring at me like that? i asked
"Nothing, nothing" Rory replied looking at me up and down...
Rory and I both looked at the Doctor , he looked at us both smiling. Smiling? why would he be smiling
"I think it's time we go on another little adventure" he said
I didn't want to go on an adventure, not after last night. How could i possibly explore new galaxies and planets with my husband who i cheated on only last night? I knew the Doctor wanted to see me happy, he loves it when i smile and i smile because he makes me smile. I love Rory I do, I feel terrible what i've done to him. I don't know who i love more, I can't choose? How can i possibly choose? I waited my whole life for this one man and when he leaves you for twelve years you need someone to open up to, to cry onto and someone who's there for you when he's not. That was Rory, i never meant to fall in love with Rory,we were best friends, me, Jeff, Kirsty and Rory. I knew he wanted to be more, the way he looked at me. I gave up and settled down with the fact that he wasn't coming back. I let myself fall in love with Rory. Then that one day it all changed.....
The day he came back, my raggedy doctor came back. That noise from that glorious time machine the ringing that was in my ears every night as i fell asleep. And when he found out who i was and how late he was for me, he looked into my eyes, those eyes that i looked into from when i was seven years old, the eyes that i look at now and see nothing but love and desire. The way he holds me, hugs me and kisses me. It makes me feel complete, the years i've been waiting, the stories i told about him and the drawings in my scrapbook it's sounds like something out of a fairytale...
Then reality hit....
"Where did you have in mind?" I asked
"Im thinking Zyronth"
"Hhhmmm i was thinking breakfast!" i hissed
The Doctor sighed as i walked through to the kitchen rumaging through the cupboards looking for some cereal to eat. Rory left the Doctor in the concole room and joined me in the kitchen...
"Alright what's going on?" Rory asked me
"What do you mean?" i asked as i found the cereal and started opening the box....
"Something or someone made you upset last night Amy" Rory said
I didn't want to look at him i was so busy trying to open the paket, he took the box off of me and opened it for me...
"Upset?" i asked pouring the cereal out into a bowl...
"Amy will you just look at me" Rory hissed
I sighed and put down the bowl, and looked up at Rory's face. He looked scared in a way, maybe he was scared of the fact that someone hurt me...
"What is it?" he asked
"Amy?"
"Rory it's nothing..." i said placing my hands on his cheeks and looking into his eyes "Honestly" i whispered
He stood still as i walked away slowly shuting my eyes tight wishing i didn't just lie to him. I joined the Doctor back in the console room. He was busy pulling the levers and fidgeting about with the screen....
"Did you have something to eat?" the Doctor asked me
"I lost my apetite" i whispered as i walked to my room.....
The Doctor looked at me as it turned my back to him too. Rory walked back through to the console room after i left.
"I just want to know whats wrong with her" Rory said to the Doctor
"Im sure it's nothing" the Doctor said
"I know but i just worry about her you know?" Rory sighed
The Doctor felt terrible,Rory was his friend and now he's going about kissing his wife in the middle of the night while he's asleep in bed dreaming about me.
Hours passed, the Doctor wondered around the rooms he found Rory asleep in the library's chair, he had a book in his lap. The Doctor closed the door back over. He planned to go back to his bedroom for a sleep. Then as he passed my bedroom he heard sobs from it. He couldn't leave me there crying, it hurt him when i cried. He slowly opened the door, he found me on my bed lying on my side, crying into a pillow causing more mascara stained all over it.
"Amy" he whispered
"Just go away!" i hissed
"I can't do this anymore" i whispered
"Am-"
"It's not even been a day and i feel horrible, how else am i supposed to cope every other day of my life?"
"Amy listen-"
"No you listen!" i hissed cuting him off jumping up onto my feet saying it inches from his face...
"Keep your voice down" the Doctor hissed
I then remembered Rory was asleep down the hall in the library, he came in to check on me earlier i pretended i was asleep just so he wouldn't speak to me...
"We kissed last night remember!"
"I love you and you love me"
"I know, i know" he whispered as he kissed me softly on the forehead as i cried.
Im sure he was crying a tad too, he wrapped his arms around me and whispered, "Pond what am i going to do with you?"
"But i love Rory too i just don't know what to do"
"This isn't how it's supposed to be, it's just not fair" i whispered as i crawled back onto my bed to lie down..."It's just not fair"
"We need to tell him"
"I know, I know" he said
"But what am i supposed to say? Im sorry Rory but i'm in love with someone else, i want a divorce although we just got married?" i sighed
"I don't know if i can" i said
That night as we talked and cried about how we were going to tell Rory about all of this...we didn't know Rory wasn't asleep at all, he was actually standing out in the hallway and he heard everything......