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Epic Rap Battles of History Articles

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Opinion by Johan_T posted over a year ago
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Help [John lenon
you're making my ears bleed
you need a muzzle

why are you pissed off all the time
didn't your mum give you a cuddle?

you're the type of guy who could die
of a heart attack just in the shower

you need to chill out for a minute
and smoke weed for an hour

every time I watch your show
all you do is scream at me
and your face looks like a sh*t I took
high on LSD

I'm John Lennon, I'm a legend
I can see through all your tricks

I wonder how much George Bush paid
you to suck his d*ck.
[Bill ' o reilly]
You F*cking long hair,
living in your yellow submarine
well you're about to get sunk
by the right wing political machine

stop your presses Lennon,
you call me MR. Bill O'Reilly

When it comes to squashing Limeys
I come recommended highly

you're weak, between you and me
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Opinion by Johan_T posted over a year ago
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I pity the fool who tries to step to Clubber Lang
Call me BA biceps cause I’ll crush your whole gang
Bring Tuesday, Friday and little trolly the train and watch me dip their @ss in gold
And wear em like my neck chain – SUCKA!
I’ll choke you with your own sweater sleeves
You couldn’t even beat me in the land of make believe. PUNK!
I will Mr. T bag you, in the closest cemetery
Nobody’s gonna miss you cause all your friends imaginary

["Mister Rogers"]
Hi there neighbor
I hope you don’t mind if I change my shoes
I’ll be rocking sneakers till this battle’s over so I don’t get blood from your ugly face on my penny loafers. I like you just the way you are, one in a million, but it looks like the barber gave your head a brazillian. I pity your neck, Mr. Gold chains. You’ve got too many, the only gold I keep is on the shelf in my Emmys. I teach the whole world full of children. I can tell you call yourself T cause you’re too dumb to spell.
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