I found this post on tumblr, can't remember the exact blog url so if anyone recognizes it I can add it in the credit/source at the end! Definitely one of my favorite articles on Harmony for sure!

When asked why I ship Harry/Hermione (Harmony), I realize ‘because they’re perfect for each other’ doesn’t cut it. So here, in semi-order, are the top 5 reasons I ship Harmony. I understand these will intermingle at points but I’m going to try to keep them as separate as possible.

1. Great foundation of friendship

I’m not going to deny Ron and Hermione have a friendship. They do. They’re great friends. What I am saying is Harry and Hermione have a better and deeper friendship. We see this time and again in the books when Hermione places herself in front of Harry to keep him safe or Harry risks precious seconds to make sure Hermione is safe.

Hermione was petrified because she was helping Harry solve the Basilisk riddle, she put herself in danger because of the werewolf, and she stayed with Harry during the prolonged camping trip when Ron, the supposed love of her life, left. Harry wanted to take Hermione, in addition to Ron, at the bottom of the lake because “she’s my friend too”, he allowed Hermione to comfort him and led him back to his friends when he thought Voldemort was taking over his mind, and he worried about her when he saw her crumple into a heap at the Ministry break in. These are several examples where Harry does more for Hermione or sticks his neck out farther for Hermione than he does Ron and the same thing goes for Hermione: she risks her life time and time again for Harry where she doesn’t reciprocate that for Ron.

Harry and Ron and Hermione and Ron have great friendships and they’ll be friends forever. There’s no doubt about that and I wouldn’t try to argue that point. The point I will argue is Harry and Hermione have a deeper friendship that makes them put the other first, ahead of themselves. This is shown when Hermione looks at Harry and realizes something is wrong and when Harry is there for Hermione and doesn’t say anything, only gives her the support she needs. They can read each other; read each other’s expressions and understand the other without words. That is the mark of a deep friendship. Ron and Hermione can’t do that and really, neither can Ron and Harry. Maybe to a certain extent they can, but there are clearly more than a handful of moments in the book Harry looks at Hermione or Hermione looks at Harry and they know what the other is thinking.

1.5) Similar backgrounds

This isn’t part of the first point but it can’t be considered its own point. Harry and Hermione come from similar backgrounds—they’re both from the muggle world. This doesn’t automatically make them ‘made for each other’ but it does allow them to have a friend that hasn’t grown up around magic. They’re going through this new experience together and that’s a special bond Ron and Ginny can’t understand. We see this multiple times; when Hermione mentions ‘bugs’, describing muggle SCUBA equipment, and the fairy tales in book 7 are several examples of when muggle things are mentioned and Harry understands while Ron doesn’t.

This doesn’t mean a wizard/witch and a muggle/a wizard/witch from the muggle world can’t get married—but their backgrounds are certainly different and so their upbringings were different. As long as they can discuss important things like adults, a wizard/witch could marry a muggle/a wizard/witch from the muggle world. It does, however, help if they have similar backgrounds because there are going to be times spouses fall back on their upbringing and it could result in arguments.

2) Don’t let arguments get in the way of friendship

Speaking of arguments, I’m not going to say Harry and Hermione didn’t have their fair share of arguments. They argued but they don’t let the arguments get in the way of their friendship. When Harry and Hermione argue they have it out, might be cool to each other for a few days but they shake hands and make up. When Ron and Hermione argue it’s a knock-down, drag-out fight that ends in Hermione stomping away in frustration or running away in tears and Ron being moody. They won’t talk for days and in the end when they finally do ‘make up’, the original argument isn’t resolved. It’s swept under the rug because the point is moot: it’s either resolved or Hermione’s proved correct.

Also, when Ron and Hermione have a falling out, Harry is forced to spend his time between his best friends separately while trying to mediate a compromise between them. Does this mean when Ron and Hermione are married and they fight, Ron storms off to Harry’s place for a few days, maybe weeks, while Harry plays mediator? I understand Ron does mature a bit in the end but in an argument we always fall back on our basic fight-or-flight instincts; for Ron and Hermione that always ends in an yelling match where Hermione storms away in a huff or runs off crying.

Ron and Hermione allow their arguments to cloud their friendship while Harry and Hermione don’t let arguments get in the way of their friendship. They are always first, and foremost, best friends. We don’t see this attitude between Ron and Hermione because their arguments tend to end in a screaming match.

3) See each other as they truly are

When Harry looks at Hermione, he doesn’t see the ‘brightest witch of her age’, he sees his best friend Hermione Granger. When Hermione looks at Harry, she doesn’t see the ‘boy who lived’, she sees her best friend Harry Potter. There’s no expectation to live up to a title or an IQ number; they can be themselves, whoever that happens to be.

Ron treats Hermione as an information machine and a walking encyclopedia. Ginny has hero worshipped Harry since day one. She reacts to him at Platform 9 ¾ in the first book and doesn’t stop. Even when Harry and Ginny are dating and break up in the 6th book, she says something about how she knew he would always save the day. So Ron treats Hermione like a resource and Ginny hero worships Harry—how does that allow Harry and Hermione to be themselves?

Hermione can’t be anything other than the ‘brightest witch of her age’ with Ron because he always expects her to know what to do. Ginny will always hero worship Harry as the ‘boy who lived’—that’s a status he has to live with everywhere he goes and with Ginny, he always has to be that title. I know we’re supposed to believe Ron and Ginny move past that stage but comments at the end of the 7th book, where we learn about the past 19 years of their life through little comments and jokes, still show Ron relies on Hermione’s intelligence and that he is immature and Ginny still hero worships Harry. Maybe not as much as they did in school, but there are still elements to their old behavior present.

4) On the same level

Harry and Hermione are saddled with certain responsibilities because of who they are—this is something Ron and Ginny will never be able to relate to. Harry has to save the world and he’s known this since Voldemort came back in book 1: he didn’t know to what extent but by books 4 and 5, he has pieced together that every year there has been something and he’s burdened with saving the day. Hermione is his best friend and extremely smart and quick on the uptake. This allows her to process things and come up with answers that help Harry in his fight making her just as important as he is. These qualities give them the ability to relate to each other better and on about the same level.

It’s a known fact girls mature quicker than boys so there will always be some level of immaturity with Harry or Ron, but notice how even when Harry doesn’t understand what Hermione says, he goes along with it. If Ron doesn’t understand, he passes it off as crazy and ‘just Hermione’ while Harry wants to understand what she’s thinking. He may not fully understand what she’s saying but he knows it’s important to her so it might be important to him and therefore he listens. Not all the time, but a lot more than Ron.

It’s not only the idea that Harry wants to understand, which makes him better suited towards Hermione, it’s that Ron doesn’t. In book 4, when Hermione explain what’s happening with Cho, Harry understands Cho is fighting some inner battles but Ron completely dismisses what Hermione says by replying one person ‘couldn’t feel all of that or their head would explode’. Harry is trying to understand what he doesn’t know and Hermione loves learning what she doesn’t know so they challenge each other into becoming a better person. Harry and Hermione can understand each other better and relate to each other better because they’re more on the same level than Harry is with Ginny and Hermione is with Ron.

4.5) Help each other grow

Again, this point can’t really stand on its own but it is worthy of mentioning. Someone once pointed out that Harry and Ginny work together because Ginny gets his humor and can be sarcastic with him. Sarcasm has been a defense mechanism for Harry and he needs someone to ‘get it’ to be with him. I admit sarcasm is a huge defense mechanism for Harry but once he’s safe he needs to be able to let his guard down and open himself up to new experiences. Ginny doesn’t help Harry grow as an individual, she doesn’t challenge him to be better because she hero worships him and already thinks the world of him.

We see Hermione teaching Harry and Harry teaching Hermione. We see them helping each other and encouraging each other to become a better person. Hermione tries with Ron, she really does, but he doesn’t ‘get it’ and doesn’t grow as a person. He grows as a character but it’s not because of Hermione’s influence, it’s circumstances outside of Hermione. Ginny, when she starts dating Harry, doesn’t make him a better person she thinks he’s fine the way he is; which ties back to the hero worship.

The idea of making him/her better does not mean Hermione is pushing Harry to become better because that’s something Harry has to do for himself and vice versa with Hermione. It’s the old adage of being able to lead a horse to water but not being able to make it drink. Hermione is leading Harry to the water but it’s Harry’s choice to drink. He makes himself better with her encouragement and in turn, Hermione becomes a better person because of Harry’s encouragement. Ron doesn’t help Hermione and Ginny doesn’t help Harry be a better person; which is a huge part of being in a relationship.

5) In real life, a ‘Hermione’ and ‘Ron’ relationship wouldn’t work

I alluded to this statement earlier when I mentioned what happens when Ron and Hermione are together and they fight—does Hermione storm away in a huff or run away crying? Does Ron crash on Harry’s couch while Harry mediates between the two of them? I understand there’s a fine line between love and hate and that sometimes a fiery relationship makes for a passionate relationship but other times, a fiery relationship ends up getting people burned.

Ron is selfish and immature throughout almost all 7 books—he grows a little, I mean he did come back in book 7, but in the epilogue he’s still clearly immature. He mentions disinheriting his child if they don’t make Gryffindor. I understand he was trying to lighten the mood but when your 11-year old child is going off to school and is scared, you don’t make jokes like that, and along with several other statements I’m led to the conclusion that he isn’t mature. This means Hermione’s had to put up with this behavior for the past 19 years they’ve been together and she must have the patience of a saint. Because they’re obviously happily married, she either puts up with his immaturity or is has enough patience to try a saint when it comes to her husband.

But let’s look at this realistically: no one would stay with someone if they were that immature. I did say Ron has matured but he is nowhere near the level of maturity he needs to be. This imbalance would cause a strain on their relationship and it would lead to Hermione seeking emotional support somewhere else. A spouse needs to be able to come along side their partner and support them in whatever way they need to be supported: mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually, and sexually. All five are critical to a relationship and if one falters, the relationship is doomed. So in a Ron and Hermione relationship, Ron, not being as mature as he should be, would not be able to handle at least the mental and emotional portion of their relationship. This means Hermione would have to seek that support somewhere else. Women are very emotionally driven so after a while, there’s no reason for Hermione to stay in a relationship with Ron.

Now let’s look at Harry and Ginny. On the outside they seem compatible with each other but let’s look deeper. Ginny hero worships Harry, this point is well founded and mentioned multiple times in the books. This means Harry will always have to ‘live up’ to a certain expectation Ginny has for him; even if it’s subconscious. And as mentioned before, Ginny doesn’t help Harry become a better person because to her, he’s already ‘good enough’. So Harry will continue living in his own head with no one to challenge him to be better and living up to a certain expectation set by Ginny. He’ll eventually become depressed because he has a tendency to blame himself whenever something goes wrong, which we’ve seen in the books multiple times. This is more conjecture than anything but hero worship consists of idolizing someone and I believe if Harry ever brought these concerns to Ginny she’d ignore him and brush them off. This would lead to a situation similar with Ron and Hermione, where Ginny isn’t mentally and emotionally supporting her husband.

So we have one relationship where the husband isn’t supporting his wife in the capacities she needs and another relationship where the wife isn’t supporting her husband the way he needs. I’m NOT saying Ron and Ginny are bad people. What I am saying is as future spouses, Ron is not right for Hermione and Ginny is not right for Harry.

J.K. Rowling once said she fancies herself as Hermione and has repeated that sentiment several times. She has also said she’s dated, and once married, her fair share of ‘Ron’s but none of those relationships worked out. She has called her current husband her ‘Harry’. I’m not going to get into the psychology of those statements but I will say it’s very telling of how relationships work, especially in the context of Harry, Hermione, Ron, and Ginny.

I want to say one thing after all this: I don’t doubt that Hermione loves Ron and Harry loves Ginny. In canon, they are married to each other and that signifies some level of admiration. The book is already written and Rowling hasn’t said anything about retracting what happens in the epilogue. Someone will probably look at this and say “That’s what made Harry and Hermione such great friends, not future spouses” and I don’t deny that they are great friends because of these things. I am saying these stepping stones are the perfect lead up to a romantic relationship and, in my case, the ‘isn’t it obvious?’ and ‘anvil-sized clues’ were obscured by the best unintentional love story ever written.

So here’s my conclusion: the canon couples of Ron/Hermione and Harry/Ginny wouldn’t work. They are damaging relationships to all parties involved despite Rowling’s want of a big, happy family in the end. Does this mean Harry/Hermione would have worked out? Who knows but I’d like to think so. If not, I would have liked to see them with people we’ve never met—people they made a life with outside of Hogwarts; to see them completely happy and still friends even after all that time.

They're best friends and they know each other better than anyone else. Harry knows the wrongs and rights of Hermione and same goes for Hermione about Harry, yet they accept each other without thinking it twice. They make each other a better person. Hermione believes in Harry more than anyone, she knows he’s a great wizard not for what others say but because she KNOWS. She’ve read about him and yet she’s not overwhelmed about Harry’s fame, she really wants to know him for the person he is. He was her first friend, her best friend. Harry knows Hermione is the brightest witch of her age and he’s proud to say it, even prouder since she’s muggleborn, same as his mom.

They know, accept and believe in each other. They can talk without words, looks, touches and holding hands say more than words, also, actions speak for themselves. Hermione is the voice inside Harry’s mind. She’s his conscience and Harry always listen to what Hermione has to say even when he disagrees, Same for Hermione, she’s with him although she knows he can be wrong. They don’t fight, they argue about situations and through the talking they reached a settlement. They get each other so well and they always there to support the other.

Harry was the first one to care about her, he risks his life to save Hermione’s. She’s the first person he thought about and they both are always the first and only ones to noticed when something is wrong with the other. None of the others had noticed a thing. They can make smile and comforting each other like no one else can.

Hermione has always stayed with him, she will never turn on him and leave him alone. She’s loyal and she’s even sacrified her own family to go with him until the end. She doesn’t want to think about not having him and Harry CAN’T and DO NOT WANT to imagine it, when he thought for a moment that she was gone, that he had lost her he couldn’t even breath. He can’t conceive a life without her.

We have looks, we have hugs and a lot of moments to prove that they were meant for each other. They’re soulmates, bonded for life. The kind of bond Harry and Hermione have, is the one I’d love to have someday, they have so much respect for each other and trust with their lifes. Nothing can change that.

And…

IT COULD HAVE GONE THAT WAY