'Last Resort' was an intense episode for a number of reasons. There was a lot going on. But as an avid Thirteen fan, I was particularly interested in what she went through in this episode.
Previously, we knew that Thirteen was afraid of her impending death, but we also saw that she was very determined to gain some control over the rest of her life, to the point where she seemed to be more interested in controlling her death rather than the remainder of her life. I had really sympathised with this position. Her disease will cause her to lose control of her body and her mind. Thus, it is understandable that she would wish to be in control of her life and to live her life in a way that ensures she experiences all of lifes greatest sensations.
In 'Last Resort', Thirteen volunteers to have the various treatments and tests conducted on her. I have a couple of theories as to why she did that. The first one, is the one that House suggests: martyrdom. In previous episodes, Thirteen as stated that she wants her life and her work to mean something to someone. She wants to leave an imprint of people and on the world. In 'Last Resort', she was given the opportunity to self-destruct and for it to mean something. Thus, she gets to have control over how she dies, and he death will mean something significant to the hostages she will help save and the patient who needs his diagnosis. Of course, when it comes time to face her death, she changes her mind (cue misanthrope86's cheers of joy!) and realises that she wants to be in control, but she does not want to die. Personally, it was really moving for me to see her be given the opportunity to end her life right then and there, but then not take it.
My second theory is linked to her sensation-seeking. The tests and treatments that she volunteered to be the guinea pig for were dangerous and painful. And so is her current party-hard lifestyle. I think she is numbing herself by over-stimulating, if you know what I mean. I think she wants to feel intense emotions and sensations in order to drown out her fear of her disease. So by volunteering for the pain, Thirteen was provided with an opportunity to experience living and dying at the same time, which is essentially what she will be doing for the last years of her life.
As you all know, I love Thirteen. So 'Last Resort' was a hard and intense episode for me to watch. It was so, so great to see that she chose to live when she could have easily ended her pain.
Now I look foreward to the coming episodes to see the effects that experience has had on her.
Previously, we knew that Thirteen was afraid of her impending death, but we also saw that she was very determined to gain some control over the rest of her life, to the point where she seemed to be more interested in controlling her death rather than the remainder of her life. I had really sympathised with this position. Her disease will cause her to lose control of her body and her mind. Thus, it is understandable that she would wish to be in control of her life and to live her life in a way that ensures she experiences all of lifes greatest sensations.
In 'Last Resort', Thirteen volunteers to have the various treatments and tests conducted on her. I have a couple of theories as to why she did that. The first one, is the one that House suggests: martyrdom. In previous episodes, Thirteen as stated that she wants her life and her work to mean something to someone. She wants to leave an imprint of people and on the world. In 'Last Resort', she was given the opportunity to self-destruct and for it to mean something. Thus, she gets to have control over how she dies, and he death will mean something significant to the hostages she will help save and the patient who needs his diagnosis. Of course, when it comes time to face her death, she changes her mind (cue misanthrope86's cheers of joy!) and realises that she wants to be in control, but she does not want to die. Personally, it was really moving for me to see her be given the opportunity to end her life right then and there, but then not take it.
My second theory is linked to her sensation-seeking. The tests and treatments that she volunteered to be the guinea pig for were dangerous and painful. And so is her current party-hard lifestyle. I think she is numbing herself by over-stimulating, if you know what I mean. I think she wants to feel intense emotions and sensations in order to drown out her fear of her disease. So by volunteering for the pain, Thirteen was provided with an opportunity to experience living and dying at the same time, which is essentially what she will be doing for the last years of her life.
As you all know, I love Thirteen. So 'Last Resort' was a hard and intense episode for me to watch. It was so, so great to see that she chose to live when she could have easily ended her pain.
Now I look foreward to the coming episodes to see the effects that experience has had on her.