I thought I'd give it a go at a "Human" Penguins fan-fiction. This is a trial run.
Let me know what you think.
In the heart of Manhattan, near Central Park, is a strange apartment complex. The Apartment Menagerie is made of brick, a century old, and placed between two shiny sky-scrapers. The windows all have black bars, the twenty-three stories are all crooked, and the newest addition of a Madagascar Baobab tree sits atop the twenty-third floor.
But it also had an indoor swimming pool in need of a lifegaurd, which was what brought Marlene DeOdder to it's arched gate-way. She walked up to the help-desk and hesitated before ringing the bell. It was several minutes before anyone came.
An older woman in a worn yellow uniform finally came in and slumped into the seat.
" Hello. I'm Alice. I'm the secretary. And head Janitor. And the co-landlady. Can I help you?" She asked as she began typing on the old model computer.
Marlene smiled widely and extended one gloved hand.
" Hi, I'm Marlene DeOdder and...well" She said as she put her hand down." I saw the want ad for a life-gaurd, and I happed to be certified! I'm also here for room and board...all of my info is here. " She pulled several crinkled papers out of her fabric purse and handed them to Alice. Alice slowly took them with a sigh and began to slowly thumb through them. Marlene put her hands in her hoodie's pockets and waited.
" Seems legit. You got the job. It comes with discounted room and board too. " She said. " Glad you came too. Iv'e been getting complaints from some...other tenants."
Alice's tone concerned Marlene. " Oth-Other tenants?"
Alice shrugged and continued typing. " Weird bunch. Dress in uniform, brothers or something. Ex-FBI I think....there. You're all set up. Here's your key. Your room is O1-3 on level 23, top floor."
Marlene took the key and thanked Alice, who responded with a grunt and continued typing.
She grabbed her suitcases and went towards the elevator...which was marked out of order.
" Well...nothing like some exercise then..." she murmured with a forced smile as she began the long trek up the stairs with her burdens.
" I hate stairs! " She said once she reached level 17. She dropped her suitcases and sat against the wall, breathing heavily. Suddenly she heard a fast thumping that wasn't her heart.
" Come on you sissies, it's only our fifteenth time up and down this sucker!" A loud voice echoed up the stairs.
" Aye-Aye Skipper!" Three voices sounded off in unison. The Thumping grew louder, until she saw a very well-built man in a tank, camouflage pants, run up the top of the stairs, his two dog-tags jangling as he ran. He stopped as soon as he saw Marlene and her over-packed suitcases. Before she had a chance to speak Skipper called down the stairs.
" Men, we have a Code 75 on Level 17. Commence Operation D.I.D!"
Immediately three similarily dressed men jumped the railway, snatched up the suitcases, and stood at attention.
" Burdens secured Skipper!" The smallest one said as he adjusted his load.
" Excellent. Kowalski, check the physical condition of the civilian D.I.D....and run a background check while you are at it. Tell me who this damsel is. "
Marlene was already standing. " Um, Thanks but I don't think that..."
" Stand still, please, Madam." The tallest man said as he pulled out a smart-phone, which emitted a scan-light.
" Processing" He said. " processing... still Processing. Gah, curse this wi-fi connection!"
He placed a hand on his hip and tapped his foot impatiently. Marlene noticed that despite having run extensively he was hardly out of breath, his hair was nearly perfect, and he hardly looked sweaty. How often did these guys work out?!
After a few moments she cleared her throat.
" Um...You know I really appreciate the help but the background check isn't necessary, I'm Mar-..."
Skipper whipped around and came to eye-level with her, and uncomfortably close.
" Oh really? Just ask Mannfredi and Johnson. Oh, you can't. They didn't run the background check on their D.I.D's. Rico tell the lady what happened."
The huge, leering figure grinned grimly and began to wildly jump around the floor and give out unholy screams and terrible noises from his mouth, ending with a disturbingly realistic death-rattle.
" Oh. Um. Okay. I wasn't planning on sleeping tonight anyway." Marlene managed to say in her shock.
Rico shrugged and muttered something that sounded like "tough crowd". Then he merely stared off into the distance, stroking the long scar on the right side of his face.
" A-hah! Skipper this is Marlene DeOdder. She hails originally from California and moved here for a change of scenery and the fact that she was unfairly cut from her last line of work. She works as a free-lance graphic designer and studio artist but has has several laborious jobs requiring both intelligence and skill, and is now employed here as the life-gaurd. No affiliations with any known enemies of the state or the PNGN Agency. Her room number is O1-3 on level twenty-three."
" Well, in that case, welcome to the Menagerie Apartments! Private, Kowalski, Rico, escort the D.I.D's baggage up to her room, I'll escort the D. I. D."
Private, Kowalski, and Rico saluted, grabbed the luggage and raced up the stairs.
" Last one up is a silly-billy ding-dong!" Private said as he began trotting up the stairs.
Rico gracefully tripped Private up a step and then blew a terrific raspberry at him.
" Hey, w-wait up!" He said as he bounded up and ran after them.
" Those knuckleheads." Skipper said with a chuckle. Marlene gave a little laugh. Sure, they seemed eccentric but she could see herself being friends with these guys.
" All right, time to escort you, Damsel in Distress." He said as he easily picked her up and slung her across his shoulder. " Just stay calm and I'll have you home in no time with a low risk of injury!"
" Whoa, wait. what?" She protested. " Put me down...wait a minute...I'm the Damsel in Distress!? ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING?"
He paid her no attention as he bounded up the stairs. She sighed and shook her head.
" I wonder if it was ever a good idea to leave California at all. "