Here are some of my favourite quotes from TV series House MD, most of them by the evil yet adorable genius Gregory House. Feel free to add your favourites in comments.

Hi. It's like hello only shorter.

Humanity is overrated.

Never is just 'reven' spelled backwards.

We are selfish, base animals crawling across the earth, but 'cause we've got brains, if we try really hard, we can usually aspire to something that is less than pure evil.

Doing things changes things. Not doing things leaves things exactly as they were.

People can do good things but their instincts are not good.

There's a reason that everybody lies: it works. It's what allows society to function.

Dying people lie, too. Wish they'd worked less, they'd been nicer, they'd opened orphanages for kittens. If you really want to do something, you do it, you don't save it for sound byte.

Lies are like children: hard work, but they're worth it because the future depends on them.

People who have a problem with boxes are people who don't fit in them.

I've found that when you want to know the truth about someone that someone is probably the last person you should ask.

Nothing matters, we're all just cockroaches, wildebeests dying in the riverbank, nothing we do has any lasting meaning.

You're on a plane! We're all on planes. Life is dangerous and complicated, and... it's a long way down.

You know how they say, "you can't live without love"? Well, oxygen is even more important.

Successes only last until someone screws them up. Failures are forever.

It's a basic truth of the human condition that everybody lies. The only variable is about what.

We're all pathetic. It's what makes everything interesting.

People don't get what they deserve. They just get what they get, and there's nothing any of us can do about it.

Cameron:[To House]Love is an emotion certain people experience, similar to happiness. No, maybe I should give a more relatable example.

Perseverance does not equal worthiness.

No, there is not a thin line between love and hate. There is, in fact, a Great Wall of China with armed sentries posted every twenty feet between love and hate.

Why is one simpler than two? It's lower, it's lonelier, but is it simpler?

I am both amused and annoyed that you think I should be less stubborn than you are.

(to Cuddy) You see the world as it is, and you see the world as it could be. What you don't see is what everybody else sees: the giant, gaping chasm in between.

(about Cameron)I love children. So filled with hope.

Wilson: People like talking about people. Makes us feel superior. Makes us feel in control. And sometimes, for some people, knowing some things makes them care.

You want to make things right? Too bad. Nothing's ever right.

Ideas are not pop cans; recycling them sucks.

Ah, my birthday. Normally I'd put on a festive hat and celebrate the fact that the Earth has circled the Sun one more time; I really didn't think it was going to make it this year, but darn it if it wasn't the little planet that could all over again.

I don't ask why patients lie. I just assume they all do.

(Chase to Foreman) You don't let other people's problems affect you. You don't let your own problems affect you, and it's the screw-ups that make us interesting. You're never out of control, which is good... and boring. Never losing control means you're never putting yourself out there, never pushing your limits.

Saving lives is just collateral damage.

Every person with an STD has something in common: They got it while they had SWS; "sex while stupid."

White lies are lies we tell to make other people feel better.Rationalizations are lies we tell to make ourselves feel better.

I assume "minimal at best" is your stiff upper lip British way of saying "no chance in hell."

People don't change. For example, I'm going to keep repeating "People don't change."

Who said the world was supposed to work?

There's an evolutionary imperative why we give a crap about our family and friends. And there's an evolutionary imperative why we don't give a crap about anybody else. If we loved all people indiscriminately, we couldn't function.

Ignorance is bliss.

I'm sure this goes against everything you've been taught, but right and wrong do exist. Just because you don't know what the right answer is, maybe there's even no way you could know what the right answer is, doesn't make your answer right or even okay.

[Knocking] I know you're in there! I can hear you caring!