Welcome to the block. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.
Audience: *Cheering, clapping, and whistling*
Master Sword & Tom Foolery: *Standing in front of a house*
Tom: Hi everybody. We're just gonna cut through the crossover parody today.
Audience: WHAT?!
Tom: Relax, I'm just joking.
Audience: Oh, *Laughing*
Master Sword: What is today's crossover parody Tom?
Tom: Storm Of The Century. It combines the fanfic, The Storm with the MLP episode, Swarm Of The Century. Let us begin.
Storm Of The Century
Starring everyone as theirselves
Fluttershy: *Sees a snowflake on the ground* What is this doing here? It's summer. I better take this, and show it to Twilight.
But Twilight was too busy being an asshole.
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: Alright man, we gotta get things set up for our next episode of My Little Pornstar.
Audience: *Clapping*
Fluttershy: *Arrives* Twilight, I found something-
Twilight: Man, get lost.
Audience: Oh!
Fluttershy: But Twilight-
Twilight: Get outta my face nigga!
Audience: Boo!! Twilight sucks.
Fluttershy: It's very important.
Twilight: *Takes snowflake from Fluttershy* I'll look at it later, alright? Now get the hell outta here!
Fluttershy: *Runs away*
Twilight: Stupid coward. Wouldn't be surprised if she got hurt by a butterfly.
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: *Looks at the snowflake, then performs a spell*
It starts to snow in Ponyville, and everyone is worried.
Fillies: *Happy as they run outside with sleds*
Audience: *Laughing*
I said worried.
Audience: *Laughing*
Truck Driver: *Loses control, and makes the truck fall on it's side, and blows up*
Ponies: *Running away*
Master Sword: What is the meaning of all this?
Tom: I have no idea. Usually, it's Pinkie Pie's job to have no idea what happens, because she's too busy breaking the 4th wall.
Audience: *Laughing*
Buildings then started to explode.
Tom: Okay, none of this is making sense. Why are things blowing up for no reason?
Master Sword: Don't ask me!
Twilight: I'll tell you why nigga!!
Audience: *Cheering*
Tom: Seriously, why does the audience cheer every time Twilight says nigga?
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: I'm not sure. Let's focus on how to stop her.
Tom: Leave it to me. *Grabs a rock, and throws it at Twilight*
Twilight: *Gets hit in the head, and falls down unconscious*
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: She's the one that caused all of this chaos?
Discord: That's my job! She screwed things up!
Audience: *Laughing*
The End
On the next part of this episode
The I.R.S gets insulted.
Theme Song: link
Master Sword: Come on Tom, let's go meet the others.
Tom: Right behind you.
Double Scoop: *Standing on street corner*
Aina: *Runs out of her house*
Sunny: Hey, wait for me. *Flying in the middle of the street*
Saten Twist: *Polishing his chain saw, but stops to go meet the others*
Pleiades: *Arrives at corner*
Mortomis: *Standing next to Double Scoop*
Tom: More ponies!!
Snow Wonder: *Arrives in a brand new Corvette*
Cosmic Rainbow: *Flies from the clouds*
Heartsong: *Climbs out of a manhole*
Annie: *Arrives on a bicycle*
Blaze: *Flies out of a house window, and lands next to Tom*
Sophie Shimmer: *Gets off of a slow moving bus*
Astrel Sky: *Appears out of nowhere with magic*
Sean: *Lands behind Astrel Sky with a parachute*
All: We live together on the block!
Audience: *Clapping*
Announcer: Okay, stop the song! We need to keep this thing rolling.
Audience: *Laughing*
Episode 20: Don't Talk To Me
Announcer: You are not allowed to talk to SeanTheHedgehog if you do not post a comment on this episode.
Announcer: Tell us where this was filmed!!
Announcer: No. First of all, this is an article. It's not filmed-
Audience: *Laughing*
Announcer: Jesus Christ, fine. On The Block was filmed in front of a live audience.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom was at his house with Master Sword when he got a call on his phone.
Master Sword: *Eating an apple*
Tom: *Answers the phone* Hello?
IRS Pony: This is the IRS. We're taking $100,000 out of your bank account.
Tom: What for?
IRS Pony: For not paying your taxes.
Tom: I just payed them yesterday, and I don't even have $100,000!
Audience: *Laughing*
IRS Pony: You're in a lot of trouble then.
Tom: No, you're in a lot of trouble. Your organization is run by a bunch of retards!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: The only thing you give a shit about is money! Everyday, you make more then one pony live on the f**king streets for what you do!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: I bet every stallion that works in the IRS is gay, and every mare is a lesbian that farts every now, and then!
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Tom: And in conclusion, you're a bigger threat to the world than ISIS! Good bye!! *Hangs up*
Audience: *Cheering, clapping, and whistling*
Master Sword: *Finishes his apple* So, who was that?
Tom: You don't wanna know.
Coming up next, it's Princess Celestia.
Princess Celestia
Starring Celestia, Luna, Twilight, and Derpy as theirselves
Blaze as Jonathan (For this skit, he's bald.)
Cosmic Rainbow as Chrysler (For this skit, he has a mustache.)
Mortomis as Bryan
Saten Twist as Timothy
Double Scoop as Skeletor
Master Sword as Harry
Sophie Shimmer as Alexis
Astrel Sky as Jenny
Celestia was sitting at her desk when Derpy arrived.
Derpy: *Shouts very loud* FUS RO DAH!!
Audience: *Cheering*
Celestia: *Gets blown away from Derpy's shout, and goes through another building*
Debris covered a quarter of Celestia's office after the shouting made her fly away.
Celestia: *Uses her magic to reappear in her office*
Derpy: I'm sorry, did I say that outloud?
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: Get the hell out of my office!
Later, Luna was trying to act like Twilight.
Luna: Some mo' anticz Princess?
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: Yeah man. I had Derpy initiate the first one to soften Celestia.
Luna: Remember mah teachin's mah nigga. If she ain't cryin', you doin' somethin' wrong.
Twilight: I understand. Now please stop trying to act like me, you're pissing off everyone in the audience.
Audience: *Laughing*
Luna: Fine. What do you have planned for Celestia?
Twilight: A transdimensional displacement array. It's not finished yet, but I'm close to completing it. In the meantime, I got something else planned for her.
Later
Derpy: *Goes to Celestia's office* Twilight sent me to check in on you. How is everything going?
Celestia: Twilight wanted to check in on me? I never knew she gave a s*howling wolf*t abo...
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: What the *Gorilla noise* was that? Oh *Broken plate* shes censoring me! This *Guitar*.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: Don't tell me I have to walk around doing this all *Train whistle* day! No way! Tell Twilight to undo this immediately!
During dinner.
Royal Guard: *Arrives with a letter*
Celestia: My daily report. I hope it's the magazine I ordered from Equestria Daily. It'll help keep my mind off she who must not be named.
Chrysler: Are you talking about Voldemort princess?
Jonathan: No, thats he who must not be named. She who must not be named is Twilight Sparkle.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: I TOLD YOU NEVER TO MENTION HER F**KING NAME AGAIN!!
Harry: Is she still censoring you Princess?
Celestia: No, that was the regular censor. *Looks at her letter* Luna has become richer.
Ponies: *Looking at Celestia*
Celestia: She bought a cocaine factory, and is using the money she makes from that factory to buy antics from the black market. She is associating herself with Twilight as we speak.
Audience: Oooh!
Celestia: Luna. *Becomes angry* SHE HAS BETRAYED ME ONCE AGAIN!!!
The next day
Twilight: I searched other dimensions, but only found some coal. It was useless for me, so I gave it to Derpy.
Harry: What do you think she'll do with it?
Twilight: Knowing her, she'll probably think the pieces of coal are muffins, and eat them.
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: Which is exactly what I want her to do.
Celestia: *In her office*
Derpy: *Enters the office*
Celestia: *Mumbling to herself* if i have to see this idiot one more time...
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy: Go ahead, and ask me how my day went. I promise not to shout.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: How did-
Derpy then turned into Thomas The Tank Engine, and started going around Celestia's castle at a high rate of speed with this song playing: link
Set the speed to 2 once you get the song started
Audience: *Cheering, and clapping*
Timothy: *Watching Derpy* Not again.
Audience: *Laughing*
Harry: So that's where Twilight got the coal from. She went into the dimension of Thomas The Tank Engine.
Celestia: *Still in her office* When will Twilight end these escapades? First, she censors me, and now this. I've had enough! I have a burning desire to rant about this to more ponies!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Later, things went back to normal.
Twilight: Celestia is finally breaking down. One more antic oughta do the trick.
Harry: What are you planning this time? The damage is done.
Meanwhile, Celestia was ranting to several ponies in another part of the castle.
Celestia: FOR YEARS I HAD TO PUT UP WITH THESE CONSTANT ANTICS AND RANDOM SHENANIGANS!!! AND WITH EVERY SINGLE ONE, THEY BECOME INCREASINGLY ANNOYING AND UNREALISTIC!! It's as if there's no limit to the madness!! I should just buy my own antic economy, like Gilda!
Audience: *Quietly laughing*
She sits down on her chair with a nail on the seat. It hurts, and she goes flying up in the air while screaming, crashing through several ceilings.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Celestia: *Falls into her chair*
Timothy: Princess Celestia, welcome back. We have missed you very much.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: A nail in my chair. Which one of you did this?! A nail in my chair! You'll be punished severely!
Later, Twilight met up with Princess Luna at the harbor. They were the only ones there.
Twilight: Man, today was bad ass.
Luna: For sure. I hope you had that bitch bawling. If you need anymore supplies for your antics, make sure you come see me. I always find good things on the black market.
Twilight: We'll see when I get desperate.
Audience: Accept Luna's help!
Twilight: *Looks at the audience* Man, shut up. This ain't none of yo' goddamn business.
Up next, it's Golfing.
Golfing
Starring Tom Foolery as Otis
Master Sword as Chip
Snow Wonder as Elena
Heartsong as Casey
Cosmic Rainbow as Olson
Mortomis as Caddy
Blaze as Mitchell
The golf course was jam packed. Every hole on the course had at least one pony playing on it.
Otis: *On the 15th hole with Chip* So we're both tied by 40. Let's see who takes the lead. *Puts his ball on the tee*
Chip: Wouldn't be surprised if it was me.
Audience: *Light laughter*
Otis: It won't be you.
Chip: How do you know?
Otis: On the last hole, you broke your 7 iron in half for hitting your ball into the sand.
Audience: *Laughing*
Otis: *Hits his golf ball off of the tea with a 3 wood*
Chip: You know this is a par 3, right? Your ball is just gonna go into the woods.
Otis: Oh no it won't.
The ball ricocheted off of a tree, and onto the green, rolling into the hole for a hole in one.
Audience: *Clapping*
Chip: That was impressive. However, I can do better then that.
Otis: What, are you gonna get your ball onto the 16th hole from here?
Audience: *Laughing*
Chip: If I do, you owe me $88. *Puts his ball on the tee*
Otis: You'll be giving me $88 if you don't get it on the 16th hole.
Chip: *Hits the ball*
It went too far to the right, and hit a tree, going all of the way to the 1st hole.
Olson: *Going to the first hole with Mitchell* We made it just before tee time.
Mitchell: *Talks in a British accent* I say, it's tea time already?
Audience: *Laughing*
Olson: *Puts his ball on the tee, but gets hit in the head by Chip's ball. He then becomes unconscious, and falls down*
Otis: *Looking at Chip* So, where's the $88? You'll need it to pay for Olson's medical bill.
Audience: *Laughing*
Up next will be The Ass Ass Inn
Ass Ass Inn
Starring Rainbow Dash as Marisa Sayers
Double Scoop as Lloyd
Saten Twist as Mercury
Pleiades as Joanna
Master Sword as George
Mortomis as Ranger
Cosmic Rainbow as Donovan
Blaze as Richard
It was closing time at the Ass Ass Inn's strip club.
Marisa: *Closing up the strip club. She walks outside to get to her car, but a piano falls out of nowhere making this sound: link * That nearly hit me! What kind of bastard is in charge of getting the piano into Mercury's room?
Construction Ponies: *Looking down at Marisa* Sorry ma'am, we were too busy looking at our phones.
Marisa: And I thought driving while looking at your phone was bad.
Audience: *Laughing*
The next morning, the same thing happened to her as she walked into the strip club.
Marisa: *Looking at the construction workers above her* What the hell is the meaning of this?!!
Construction Ponies: *Watching youtube videos on their phones* uuuuh.. we can explain.
Audience: *Laughing*
Inside the strip club.
Marisa: *Sitting with Mercury at a table* Mercury, those ponies trying to deliver your piano nearly hit me with it twice. Convince them to be more careful, or else they'll be the ones having pianos falling toward them.
Mercury: I see what you mean, and I'll get it done. How much will you pay me?
Marisa: One grand, and five private dances for free.
Mercury: You're my kind of mare. I'll do it, but first, the dances.
Marisa: Do it now, or I'll take my business elsewhere.
Audience: *Light laughter*
Mercury: You really know how to piss someone off, you know that?
Audience: *Laughing*
Mercury: Fine, I'll get the job done.
Inside Mercury's room.
Construction Ponies: *Trying to get the piano into Saten Twist's room, but fail, and watch it fall down*
Audience: *Laughing*
Mercury: *Arrives* Fellas, I know you're trying your hardest to get me my piano, but stop being so reckless.
Construction Ponies: We're trying Mr. Twist, but it's hard.
Saten Twist: How is it hard to get a piano in here? Let me do it! *Moves the piano into his room all by himself*
Audience: *Laughing*
Saten Twist: See?
Construction Ponies: *Shocked* Oh my goodness, how did he do that?
Audience: *Laughing*
Saten Twist: For your idiocracy, I won't pay you anything.
Construction Ponies: Aw man. *Walking away, and fall off of their platform*
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Okay everypony, you know what time it is.
Audience: Blooper time!!!!
---
Twilight: Alright man, we gotta get things set up for our next episode of My Little Pornstar.
Audience: *Clapping*
Fluttershy: *Arrives* Twilight, I found something-
Twilight: Man, get lost.
Audience: Oh!
Fluttershy: But Twilight-
Twilight: Get outta my face nigga!
Audience: Boo!! Twilight sucks.
Fluttershy: It's very important.
Twilight: *Takes apple from Fluttershy* I'll look at it later, alright? Now get the hell outta here!
Fluttershy: *Runs away*
Twilight: *Looks at the apple* This ain't right!
---
Tom: *Answers the phone* Hello?
IRS Pony: Hello. You have won free tickets to a luxury cruise around the Atlantic ocean.
Tom: *Laughs* Cut.
Take 2
Tom: *Answers the phone* Hello?
IRS Pony: This is the IRS. We're taking $100,000 out of your bank account.
Tom: What for?
IRS Pony: For paying your taxes.
Tom: Wait a minute. You're stealing my money, because I payed my taxes? What is the matter with you idiots?! Your organization is run by a bunch of retards!
---
Derpy: *Shouts very loud*
Celestia: Cut....
Take 2
Derpy: *Shouts very loud* FUS RO DAH!!
Audience: *Cheering*
Celestia: *Gets blown away from Derpy's shout, and flies onto the moon*
Everyone laughed at this.
---
Twilight: I searched other dimensions, but only found some coal. It was useless for me, so I gave it to Derpy.
Harry: What do you think she'll do with it?
Twilight: Knowing her, she'll probably think the pieces of coal are muffins, and eat them.
Derpy: *Returns with the coal* I changed my mind. I don't want this.
Everyone laughed at Derpy
---
Derpy: *Enters the office*
Celestia: *Mumbling to herself* if i have to see this idiot one more time...
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy: Go ahead, and ask me how my day went. I promise not to shout.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: How did-
Derpy then turned into Thomas The Tank Engine, and started going around Celestia's castle at a high rate of speed with this song playing: link
Set the speed to 2 once you get the song started
Audience: *Cheering, and clapping*
Timothy: *Watching Derpy* Not again.
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy: *Crashes into a wall, and falls onto a train track. She goes to Ponyville at over 100 miles an hour*
---
Mitchell: *Talks in a British accent* I say, it's tae- *Laughs* This'll take a while to get right.
Take 2
Mitchell: *Talks in a British accent* I say, it's tea time al- *sneezes* Damn, I was doing so good.
Take 3
Mitchell: *Talks in a British accent* I say, it's tea time already?
Director: Cut, and print.
Mitchell: I actually got it right? *Acts like Napoleon Dynamite* Yes.
Audience: *Laughing*
---
Marisa: *Sitting with Mercury at a table* Mercury, those ponies trying to deliver your piano nearly hit me with it twice. Convince them to be more careful, or else they'll be the ones having pianos falling toward them.
Mercury: I see what you mean, and I'll get it done. How much will you pay me?
Marisa: One grand, and ten blowjobs for free.
Mercury: *Gets too excited, and passes out*
Marisa: *Laughs* Too much.
Director: How about just the one grand?
Marisa: Not enough.
Director: Don't turn into Photo Finish, please!
Audience: *Laughing*
The End
STH/AM6663 Entertainment. Copyright 2015
Audience: *Cheering, clapping, and whistling*
Master Sword & Tom Foolery: *Standing in front of a house*
Tom: Hi everybody. We're just gonna cut through the crossover parody today.
Audience: WHAT?!
Tom: Relax, I'm just joking.
Audience: Oh, *Laughing*
Master Sword: What is today's crossover parody Tom?
Tom: Storm Of The Century. It combines the fanfic, The Storm with the MLP episode, Swarm Of The Century. Let us begin.
Storm Of The Century
Starring everyone as theirselves
Fluttershy: *Sees a snowflake on the ground* What is this doing here? It's summer. I better take this, and show it to Twilight.
But Twilight was too busy being an asshole.
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: Alright man, we gotta get things set up for our next episode of My Little Pornstar.
Audience: *Clapping*
Fluttershy: *Arrives* Twilight, I found something-
Twilight: Man, get lost.
Audience: Oh!
Fluttershy: But Twilight-
Twilight: Get outta my face nigga!
Audience: Boo!! Twilight sucks.
Fluttershy: It's very important.
Twilight: *Takes snowflake from Fluttershy* I'll look at it later, alright? Now get the hell outta here!
Fluttershy: *Runs away*
Twilight: Stupid coward. Wouldn't be surprised if she got hurt by a butterfly.
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: *Looks at the snowflake, then performs a spell*
It starts to snow in Ponyville, and everyone is worried.
Fillies: *Happy as they run outside with sleds*
Audience: *Laughing*
I said worried.
Audience: *Laughing*
Truck Driver: *Loses control, and makes the truck fall on it's side, and blows up*
Ponies: *Running away*
Master Sword: What is the meaning of all this?
Tom: I have no idea. Usually, it's Pinkie Pie's job to have no idea what happens, because she's too busy breaking the 4th wall.
Audience: *Laughing*
Buildings then started to explode.
Tom: Okay, none of this is making sense. Why are things blowing up for no reason?
Master Sword: Don't ask me!
Twilight: I'll tell you why nigga!!
Audience: *Cheering*
Tom: Seriously, why does the audience cheer every time Twilight says nigga?
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: I'm not sure. Let's focus on how to stop her.
Tom: Leave it to me. *Grabs a rock, and throws it at Twilight*
Twilight: *Gets hit in the head, and falls down unconscious*
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: She's the one that caused all of this chaos?
Discord: That's my job! She screwed things up!
Audience: *Laughing*
The End
On the next part of this episode
The I.R.S gets insulted.
Theme Song: link
Master Sword: Come on Tom, let's go meet the others.
Tom: Right behind you.
Double Scoop: *Standing on street corner*
Aina: *Runs out of her house*
Sunny: Hey, wait for me. *Flying in the middle of the street*
Saten Twist: *Polishing his chain saw, but stops to go meet the others*
Pleiades: *Arrives at corner*
Mortomis: *Standing next to Double Scoop*
Tom: More ponies!!
Snow Wonder: *Arrives in a brand new Corvette*
Cosmic Rainbow: *Flies from the clouds*
Heartsong: *Climbs out of a manhole*
Annie: *Arrives on a bicycle*
Blaze: *Flies out of a house window, and lands next to Tom*
Sophie Shimmer: *Gets off of a slow moving bus*
Astrel Sky: *Appears out of nowhere with magic*
Sean: *Lands behind Astrel Sky with a parachute*
All: We live together on the block!
Audience: *Clapping*
Announcer: Okay, stop the song! We need to keep this thing rolling.
Audience: *Laughing*
Episode 20: Don't Talk To Me
Announcer: You are not allowed to talk to SeanTheHedgehog if you do not post a comment on this episode.
Announcer: Tell us where this was filmed!!
Announcer: No. First of all, this is an article. It's not filmed-
Audience: *Laughing*
Announcer: Jesus Christ, fine. On The Block was filmed in front of a live audience.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom was at his house with Master Sword when he got a call on his phone.
Master Sword: *Eating an apple*
Tom: *Answers the phone* Hello?
IRS Pony: This is the IRS. We're taking $100,000 out of your bank account.
Tom: What for?
IRS Pony: For not paying your taxes.
Tom: I just payed them yesterday, and I don't even have $100,000!
Audience: *Laughing*
IRS Pony: You're in a lot of trouble then.
Tom: No, you're in a lot of trouble. Your organization is run by a bunch of retards!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: The only thing you give a shit about is money! Everyday, you make more then one pony live on the f**king streets for what you do!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: I bet every stallion that works in the IRS is gay, and every mare is a lesbian that farts every now, and then!
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Tom: And in conclusion, you're a bigger threat to the world than ISIS! Good bye!! *Hangs up*
Audience: *Cheering, clapping, and whistling*
Master Sword: *Finishes his apple* So, who was that?
Tom: You don't wanna know.
Coming up next, it's Princess Celestia.
Princess Celestia
Starring Celestia, Luna, Twilight, and Derpy as theirselves
Blaze as Jonathan (For this skit, he's bald.)
Cosmic Rainbow as Chrysler (For this skit, he has a mustache.)
Mortomis as Bryan
Saten Twist as Timothy
Double Scoop as Skeletor
Master Sword as Harry
Sophie Shimmer as Alexis
Astrel Sky as Jenny
Celestia was sitting at her desk when Derpy arrived.
Derpy: *Shouts very loud* FUS RO DAH!!
Audience: *Cheering*
Celestia: *Gets blown away from Derpy's shout, and goes through another building*
Debris covered a quarter of Celestia's office after the shouting made her fly away.
Celestia: *Uses her magic to reappear in her office*
Derpy: I'm sorry, did I say that outloud?
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: Get the hell out of my office!
Later, Luna was trying to act like Twilight.
Luna: Some mo' anticz Princess?
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: Yeah man. I had Derpy initiate the first one to soften Celestia.
Luna: Remember mah teachin's mah nigga. If she ain't cryin', you doin' somethin' wrong.
Twilight: I understand. Now please stop trying to act like me, you're pissing off everyone in the audience.
Audience: *Laughing*
Luna: Fine. What do you have planned for Celestia?
Twilight: A transdimensional displacement array. It's not finished yet, but I'm close to completing it. In the meantime, I got something else planned for her.
Later
Derpy: *Goes to Celestia's office* Twilight sent me to check in on you. How is everything going?
Celestia: Twilight wanted to check in on me? I never knew she gave a s*howling wolf*t abo...
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: What the *Gorilla noise* was that? Oh *Broken plate* shes censoring me! This *Guitar*.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: Don't tell me I have to walk around doing this all *Train whistle* day! No way! Tell Twilight to undo this immediately!
During dinner.
Royal Guard: *Arrives with a letter*
Celestia: My daily report. I hope it's the magazine I ordered from Equestria Daily. It'll help keep my mind off she who must not be named.
Chrysler: Are you talking about Voldemort princess?
Jonathan: No, thats he who must not be named. She who must not be named is Twilight Sparkle.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: I TOLD YOU NEVER TO MENTION HER F**KING NAME AGAIN!!
Harry: Is she still censoring you Princess?
Celestia: No, that was the regular censor. *Looks at her letter* Luna has become richer.
Ponies: *Looking at Celestia*
Celestia: She bought a cocaine factory, and is using the money she makes from that factory to buy antics from the black market. She is associating herself with Twilight as we speak.
Audience: Oooh!
Celestia: Luna. *Becomes angry* SHE HAS BETRAYED ME ONCE AGAIN!!!
The next day
Twilight: I searched other dimensions, but only found some coal. It was useless for me, so I gave it to Derpy.
Harry: What do you think she'll do with it?
Twilight: Knowing her, she'll probably think the pieces of coal are muffins, and eat them.
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: Which is exactly what I want her to do.
Celestia: *In her office*
Derpy: *Enters the office*
Celestia: *Mumbling to herself* if i have to see this idiot one more time...
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy: Go ahead, and ask me how my day went. I promise not to shout.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: How did-
Derpy then turned into Thomas The Tank Engine, and started going around Celestia's castle at a high rate of speed with this song playing: link
Set the speed to 2 once you get the song started
Audience: *Cheering, and clapping*
Timothy: *Watching Derpy* Not again.
Audience: *Laughing*
Harry: So that's where Twilight got the coal from. She went into the dimension of Thomas The Tank Engine.
Celestia: *Still in her office* When will Twilight end these escapades? First, she censors me, and now this. I've had enough! I have a burning desire to rant about this to more ponies!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Later, things went back to normal.
Twilight: Celestia is finally breaking down. One more antic oughta do the trick.
Harry: What are you planning this time? The damage is done.
Meanwhile, Celestia was ranting to several ponies in another part of the castle.
Celestia: FOR YEARS I HAD TO PUT UP WITH THESE CONSTANT ANTICS AND RANDOM SHENANIGANS!!! AND WITH EVERY SINGLE ONE, THEY BECOME INCREASINGLY ANNOYING AND UNREALISTIC!! It's as if there's no limit to the madness!! I should just buy my own antic economy, like Gilda!
Audience: *Quietly laughing*
She sits down on her chair with a nail on the seat. It hurts, and she goes flying up in the air while screaming, crashing through several ceilings.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Celestia: *Falls into her chair*
Timothy: Princess Celestia, welcome back. We have missed you very much.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: A nail in my chair. Which one of you did this?! A nail in my chair! You'll be punished severely!
Later, Twilight met up with Princess Luna at the harbor. They were the only ones there.
Twilight: Man, today was bad ass.
Luna: For sure. I hope you had that bitch bawling. If you need anymore supplies for your antics, make sure you come see me. I always find good things on the black market.
Twilight: We'll see when I get desperate.
Audience: Accept Luna's help!
Twilight: *Looks at the audience* Man, shut up. This ain't none of yo' goddamn business.
Up next, it's Golfing.
Golfing
Starring Tom Foolery as Otis
Master Sword as Chip
Snow Wonder as Elena
Heartsong as Casey
Cosmic Rainbow as Olson
Mortomis as Caddy
Blaze as Mitchell
The golf course was jam packed. Every hole on the course had at least one pony playing on it.
Otis: *On the 15th hole with Chip* So we're both tied by 40. Let's see who takes the lead. *Puts his ball on the tee*
Chip: Wouldn't be surprised if it was me.
Audience: *Light laughter*
Otis: It won't be you.
Chip: How do you know?
Otis: On the last hole, you broke your 7 iron in half for hitting your ball into the sand.
Audience: *Laughing*
Otis: *Hits his golf ball off of the tea with a 3 wood*
Chip: You know this is a par 3, right? Your ball is just gonna go into the woods.
Otis: Oh no it won't.
The ball ricocheted off of a tree, and onto the green, rolling into the hole for a hole in one.
Audience: *Clapping*
Chip: That was impressive. However, I can do better then that.
Otis: What, are you gonna get your ball onto the 16th hole from here?
Audience: *Laughing*
Chip: If I do, you owe me $88. *Puts his ball on the tee*
Otis: You'll be giving me $88 if you don't get it on the 16th hole.
Chip: *Hits the ball*
It went too far to the right, and hit a tree, going all of the way to the 1st hole.
Olson: *Going to the first hole with Mitchell* We made it just before tee time.
Mitchell: *Talks in a British accent* I say, it's tea time already?
Audience: *Laughing*
Olson: *Puts his ball on the tee, but gets hit in the head by Chip's ball. He then becomes unconscious, and falls down*
Otis: *Looking at Chip* So, where's the $88? You'll need it to pay for Olson's medical bill.
Audience: *Laughing*
Up next will be The Ass Ass Inn
Ass Ass Inn
Starring Rainbow Dash as Marisa Sayers
Double Scoop as Lloyd
Saten Twist as Mercury
Pleiades as Joanna
Master Sword as George
Mortomis as Ranger
Cosmic Rainbow as Donovan
Blaze as Richard
It was closing time at the Ass Ass Inn's strip club.
Marisa: *Closing up the strip club. She walks outside to get to her car, but a piano falls out of nowhere making this sound: link * That nearly hit me! What kind of bastard is in charge of getting the piano into Mercury's room?
Construction Ponies: *Looking down at Marisa* Sorry ma'am, we were too busy looking at our phones.
Marisa: And I thought driving while looking at your phone was bad.
Audience: *Laughing*
The next morning, the same thing happened to her as she walked into the strip club.
Marisa: *Looking at the construction workers above her* What the hell is the meaning of this?!!
Construction Ponies: *Watching youtube videos on their phones* uuuuh.. we can explain.
Audience: *Laughing*
Inside the strip club.
Marisa: *Sitting with Mercury at a table* Mercury, those ponies trying to deliver your piano nearly hit me with it twice. Convince them to be more careful, or else they'll be the ones having pianos falling toward them.
Mercury: I see what you mean, and I'll get it done. How much will you pay me?
Marisa: One grand, and five private dances for free.
Mercury: You're my kind of mare. I'll do it, but first, the dances.
Marisa: Do it now, or I'll take my business elsewhere.
Audience: *Light laughter*
Mercury: You really know how to piss someone off, you know that?
Audience: *Laughing*
Mercury: Fine, I'll get the job done.
Inside Mercury's room.
Construction Ponies: *Trying to get the piano into Saten Twist's room, but fail, and watch it fall down*
Audience: *Laughing*
Mercury: *Arrives* Fellas, I know you're trying your hardest to get me my piano, but stop being so reckless.
Construction Ponies: We're trying Mr. Twist, but it's hard.
Saten Twist: How is it hard to get a piano in here? Let me do it! *Moves the piano into his room all by himself*
Audience: *Laughing*
Saten Twist: See?
Construction Ponies: *Shocked* Oh my goodness, how did he do that?
Audience: *Laughing*
Saten Twist: For your idiocracy, I won't pay you anything.
Construction Ponies: Aw man. *Walking away, and fall off of their platform*
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Okay everypony, you know what time it is.
Audience: Blooper time!!!!
---
Twilight: Alright man, we gotta get things set up for our next episode of My Little Pornstar.
Audience: *Clapping*
Fluttershy: *Arrives* Twilight, I found something-
Twilight: Man, get lost.
Audience: Oh!
Fluttershy: But Twilight-
Twilight: Get outta my face nigga!
Audience: Boo!! Twilight sucks.
Fluttershy: It's very important.
Twilight: *Takes apple from Fluttershy* I'll look at it later, alright? Now get the hell outta here!
Fluttershy: *Runs away*
Twilight: *Looks at the apple* This ain't right!
---
Tom: *Answers the phone* Hello?
IRS Pony: Hello. You have won free tickets to a luxury cruise around the Atlantic ocean.
Tom: *Laughs* Cut.
Take 2
Tom: *Answers the phone* Hello?
IRS Pony: This is the IRS. We're taking $100,000 out of your bank account.
Tom: What for?
IRS Pony: For paying your taxes.
Tom: Wait a minute. You're stealing my money, because I payed my taxes? What is the matter with you idiots?! Your organization is run by a bunch of retards!
---
Derpy: *Shouts very loud*
Celestia: Cut....
Take 2
Derpy: *Shouts very loud* FUS RO DAH!!
Audience: *Cheering*
Celestia: *Gets blown away from Derpy's shout, and flies onto the moon*
Everyone laughed at this.
---
Twilight: I searched other dimensions, but only found some coal. It was useless for me, so I gave it to Derpy.
Harry: What do you think she'll do with it?
Twilight: Knowing her, she'll probably think the pieces of coal are muffins, and eat them.
Derpy: *Returns with the coal* I changed my mind. I don't want this.
Everyone laughed at Derpy
---
Derpy: *Enters the office*
Celestia: *Mumbling to herself* if i have to see this idiot one more time...
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy: Go ahead, and ask me how my day went. I promise not to shout.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: How did-
Derpy then turned into Thomas The Tank Engine, and started going around Celestia's castle at a high rate of speed with this song playing: link
Set the speed to 2 once you get the song started
Audience: *Cheering, and clapping*
Timothy: *Watching Derpy* Not again.
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy: *Crashes into a wall, and falls onto a train track. She goes to Ponyville at over 100 miles an hour*
---
Mitchell: *Talks in a British accent* I say, it's tae- *Laughs* This'll take a while to get right.
Take 2
Mitchell: *Talks in a British accent* I say, it's tea time al- *sneezes* Damn, I was doing so good.
Take 3
Mitchell: *Talks in a British accent* I say, it's tea time already?
Director: Cut, and print.
Mitchell: I actually got it right? *Acts like Napoleon Dynamite* Yes.
Audience: *Laughing*
---
Marisa: *Sitting with Mercury at a table* Mercury, those ponies trying to deliver your piano nearly hit me with it twice. Convince them to be more careful, or else they'll be the ones having pianos falling toward them.
Mercury: I see what you mean, and I'll get it done. How much will you pay me?
Marisa: One grand, and ten blowjobs for free.
Mercury: *Gets too excited, and passes out*
Marisa: *Laughs* Too much.
Director: How about just the one grand?
Marisa: Not enough.
Director: Don't turn into Photo Finish, please!
Audience: *Laughing*
The End
STH/AM6663 Entertainment. Copyright 2015
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see.
