posted by Shelly_McShelly
1. "Remove the plastic wrapper." -- The first instruction on a bag of microwave popcorn; to see the instructions, one first has to remove the plastic wrapper and unfold the pouch.
2. "Take one capsule by mouth three times daily until gone." -- On a box of pills.
3. "Open packet. Eat contents." -- Instructions on a packet of airline peanuts.
4. "Remove wrapper, open mouth, insert muffin, eat." -- Instructions on the packaging for a muffin at a 7-11.
5. "Use like regular soap." -- On a bar of Dial soap.
6. "Instructions: usage known." -- Instructions on a can of black pepper.
7. "Serving suggestion: Defrost." -- On a Swann frozen dinner.
8. "Simply pour the biscuits into a bowl and allow the cat to eat when it wants." -- On a bag of cat biscuits.
9. "In order to get out of car, open door, get out, lock doors, and then close doors." -- In a car manual.
10. "Please include the proper portion of your bill." -- On the envelope for an auto insurance bill.
11. "The appliance is switched on by setting the on/off switch to the 'on' position." -- Instructions for an espresso kettle.
12. "For heat-retaining corrugated cardboard technology to function properly, close lid." -- On a Domino's sandwich box.