posted by Shelly_McShelly
1) Have an uncontrollable lusting for someone else every five minutes.
2) Pretend to be from different ethnic backgrounds every hour.
3) Improvise Italian operas.
4) Gossip about someone to their face.
5) Answer every question with a question.
6) Repeat yourself constantly.
7) Act like a member of the opposite sex.
Cool Repeat yourself constantly.
9) Act like Mr. Flanders from The Simpsons.
10) Repeat yourself constantly.
11) Change what you repeat every now and then.
12) Use homonyms in your e-male that the spell cheque would knot sea as miss steaks.
13) Change what you repeat every now and then.
14) Talk to someone while looking at somebody else.
15) Employ in your casual banter extensive vocabulary that will befuddle thy contemporaries.
16) Change what you repeat every now and then.
17) One word: Caffeine.
1Cool Another word or two: Caffeine and Sugar.
20) Using non-existent words like George Bush would.
21) Change what you repeat again.
22) Speak in rapid Spanish.
23) Pretend not to know about the rule of personal space.
24) When doing number 23, pretend to have a heavy nose cold causing you to breathe heavily through your mouth. Sneeze occasionally.
25) Change what you repeat again.
26) You are better than everybody else. Let them know so.
27) Rudely correct everybody's grammar.
2Cool Don't proper grammar use while you are correcting them.
29) Pretend to be drunk.
30) Groom yourself while standing backwards (towards everybody) in an elevator.
31) Change what you repeat again.
32) Pretend your name is Cletus-Atkins-Wheatherby-Percival-Smith, and don't answer to anything else.
33) Call everybody you know Bob or Georgia. Bob for girls, Georgia for boys.
34) Fine people for stupid things, like being too popular, or having to many teeth.
35) Change what you repeat again.
36) For those who wish to annoy, riddles is that in which you should speak.
37) Lick your lips constantly, acting as if doing so is pleasurable.
3Cool Pretend to be high.
39) Become severely narcoleptic in the middle of a conversazzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
40) Change what you repeat again.
41) You ARE the lord of the dance. Never forget that.
42) Speak in Gaelic.
43) Blink rapidly and constantly.
44) Scratch yourself constantly. I am not saying where.
46) Start repeating what you say as soon as you say it.
47) Start repeating what you say as soon as you say it.
4Cool Become "The Masked Wedgie Giver."
49) Spend all day at a fast food restaurant, seeing how long it will take until your free refills cost money.
50) If paged, wait until midnight to answer the call.
51) Construct an elaborate display of ropes in your backyard and tell your neighbors that you're a ''spider person.''
52) When attending a movie you've already seen, yell out: ''Don't let him in! He's the killer!''
53) When buying a goldfish at a pet store, ask the salesperson how often you should walk it.
54) When in a crowded elevator, say loudly: ''I hope I fixed it this time.''
55) Beep when a large person backs up.
56) Look around suspiciously in public and tell onlookers about the ''little men.''
57) Insist on making inanimate objects ''dance''
5Cool Occasionally talk into your hand in public.
59) Carry a duffel bag onto an elevator, wait until it's full, then ask if anyone knows how to disarm a bomb in less than 19 seconds.
60) When stopped at a traffic light during rush hour, claw desperately at the roof of the car.
61) Insist that someone accompany you to the public rest room because of Henry, the toilet monster.
62) Insist that life is ''one big musical,'' then try to prove your theory by randomly breaking out into song in public.
63) Have this list printed on a T-shirt and write above it "Check list for Today." Don't let anybody forget that you have it on.