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Spongebob Squarepants List Article

Spongebob Quotes!

List by spongesrule posted over a year ago
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QuotesMeow.

-Gary
Y'all better apologize, or I'll be on you like ugly on an ape.

-Sandy
Hey Squidward. Hey Squidward. Hey Squidward. Hey Squidward.

-SpongeBob SquarePants
Oh, tartar sauce.

-SpongeBob SquarePants
Pants ripped off. Someone call the police, there's a pants thief on the loose.
-SpongeBob SquarePants
Don't you DARE take the name of Texas in vain.

-Sandy
Psst, Squidward, I'm working in the kitchen... at night! Hey Squidward, guess what? I'm chopping lettuce... at night! Look at me, I'm swabbing the bathroom... at night! OW I burned my hand!... at night!

-SpongeBob SquarePants
Isn't this great Squidward? Just you & me together for hours and hours and hours! And then the sun'll come up, and it'll be tomorrow, and we'll still be working! It'll be just like a sleepover! Only we'll be sweaty and covered with grease!

-SpongeBob SquarePants
You're a man now, SpongeBob, and it's time you started acting like one.

-Patrick
I order the food, you cook the food. We do that for 40 years, and then we die. That seems like a good deal to me, what do you say?

-Squidward
I'll tell you a little story called "The Ugly Barnacle": Once there was a very ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everybody died. The End.

-Patrick
Do you smell it? That smell. A kind of smelly smell. The smelly smell that smells... smelly.

-Mr. Krabs
You've never heard of the Hash Slinging Slasher??


-Squidward
I'm ready!!

-Spongebob
yellow!!!-pink!!!!
-spongebob and patrick
why my good sir, this is a krabby patty, smothered in jellyfish jelly
-spongebob
lets have another!!!
-patrick
they blow up so fast *sob sob*
-spongebob
it's big, slimy, and pink!!!
Its an alaskan bull worm!!!
-spongebob
What are the consequences of what I have just done?
-mrs. puff
Yeah,shake it,woo shake that bubble butt.
-Spongebob
Now you must equire a taste for free formed jazz
-Patrick Star
Patrick;Lets get naked Spongebob;No lets save that for when we`re selling real estate
-Spongebob & Patrick
I guess hibernation is the opposite of beauty sleep!
-patrick
Im dirty dan-no im dirty dan-im dirty dan-im dirty daaan....*continues*
-pat and spongebob
Spongebob, you can be dirty dan, I just wanna be patrick
-Patrick
who you callin pinhead?!
-Patrick
Arr harr harr harr harr !
-Mr. Krabs
Money, Money, Money!
-Mr. Krabs
Squisward: Who would want to celebrate a holiday where a fat man breaks into your house and leaves gifts?
Patrick: Like a genie!
-Squidward & Patrick
Oh, Spongebob! Why!?!
-Mrs. Puff
You'll never beat me, Im HYDRODYMAMICALY DESIGHNED!!!
-Spongebob
Spongebob: Quick, Patrick, without thinking: if you could have anything right now, what would it be?
Patrick: Um... more time for thinking.
-Spongebob & Patrick
Have you forgotten what we have been looking for knee-deep in yesterday's top 40 songs?
-Spongebob
Can you feel it Mr. Crabs?
-Little kids to Mister Crabs
Spongebob: Remember Patrick, flatter the customer, make him feel good.
[Man opens his door.]
Patrick: I love you.
-Spongebob & Patrick
Plankton: 1% evil, 99% hot gas.
-Karen (Plankton's computer wife)
He was number 1
-Sponge Bob
The belt is gone but I still feel its tickle.
-Man-Ray
Oh, I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah You're a Goofy Goober, yeah We're all Goofy Goobers, yeah Goofy, goofy, Goober, goober, yeah!

-Spongebob and Patrick
See, no one says "cool" anymore. That's such an old person thing. Now we say "coral", as in "That nose job is so coral."
-Pearl
I can't see my forehead!
-Patrick
BARNICLE MAN!!!
-Barnicle Boy
Spongebob does'nt have hair. Or does he?
-Sandy
It's a vast swirling wonderland of sparkling white pleasure. Let it fill your sences with cascading fluffy pillows of excitent, and comfort, as you've never felt before.
-Patrick
Put those eyeballs back in your head son.
-Bikini Bottom Police
But its, free day.
-Mr. Krabs
Did you hear about the goldfish that went bankrupted? Now he's a bronzefish.
-Spongebob Squarepants
EVIL!!!
-Mirmaid Man
Spongebob, I'm glad you learned your lesson. Your worship is unhealthy. Come on, Jeffrey.
-Patrick
Don't play dumb Manray. You know that's tickle belt Mirmaid Man used on you, in episode number 17.
-Spongebob Squarepants
PATRICK SQUAREPANTS!!!
-Patrick
I have checks, with little poodles on them.
-Manray
May I take your order?
-Spongebob
The only thing im good at, is being evil!
-Manray
Am I in the Jelly Spotters now?
-Spongebob Squarepants
We can teach you how to be good. Then we can let you go.
-Spongebob
Good people don't rip other people's arms off.
-Spongebob Squarepants
Don't stand to close to a squirrel, Billy. You'll catch it's stupid.
-Billy's Mom
Hello, Sandy. Me, Patrick. Do you understand?
-Patrick
MY LEGS!!!
-Fred
Who wants to lick my cheecks?
-Spongeob Squarepants
Patrick: Are you Squidward?
Fire Hydrant: ...........
Patrick: That's ok, take ur time
-Patrick & Fire Hydrant
Spongebob; "Patrick, ur genius is showing." (Patrick looks down) "Where?!?
-Spongebob and Patrick
I had 4 biscuits and then I ate one. Then I only had 3!
-Fish kid
Doughnuts!
-Patrick
Imaginaaaaaaaaaaation. (makes a rainbow.)
-Spongebob
Is mayonaise an instrament?
-Patrick
STUPID INFLATABLE PANTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
-Patrick
Guess what today is?" "Annoy Squidward Day?" "No, silly! That's on the fifteenth!"
-SpongeBob and Squidward
Good morning and all who inhabit it!
-Spongebob
there it is(meaning the krusty krab)the finest eating establishment ever established for eating
--spongebob
patrick-you mean she puts one airs spongebob-i guess
--patrick
Did you win. Ahhhhhhhhhh! Hi Spongebob

-Patrick
Those guys are dorks." "Yeah. But they're *my* dorks!
-Fish Kid and The Flying Dutchman
Do you know what I'd really like for my birthday?" "A booster seat?" "A booster seat? HOT DOG! ...I mean...no.
-Plankton and Spongebob
Remember, ravioli ravioli, give me the formuloni.
-Robot Krabs (Plankton)
Dumb people are always blissfully unaware of how dumb they really are...(drools)
-Patrick
My name's not RICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-Patrick
Are you NOW or have you ever been a sponge?
-Guard
Fred: Let's go to the Shell Shack. They have a talking dog! Tom: Great! Say, what's a dog?
-Fred and Tom
DOESN'T ANYBODY KNOW HOW TO TIE A KNOT?!!
-Spongebob
Don't worry Mr. Krabs it's not tainted meat, it's painted meat!
-Spongebob
Seaweed: 50% sea, 50% weed.
-Karen
People talk loud when they want to sound smart, right?" "CORRECT!!!
-Squidward and Plankton
beep-beep-beepbeepbeep...Respond: Why don't you ask me later!
-Robot Spongebob
Steppin' on the beach. Doo doo doo doo. Steppin' on the beach...Doo doo doo doo...
-Spongebob
I WENT TO COLLEGE!
-Plankton
Wait a second! I know what you're trying to do, Squidward. I'M NOT LETTING YOU EAT THAT PIZZA
-Spongebob
All right! Which one of you flatfoots stole my lollypop?" *spongebob, the cops, and patrick laugh* "I mean it!

-Patrick
Peas-in-a-can pie.
-Spongebob
I aint' cryin'...I'm LAUGHIN'!
-Sandy
YOU FORGOT THE PICKLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-Bubblebass
Can we say that PLANTS from Texas are dumb???!!!
-Patrick
I aint' cryin'! My helmet just sprung a leak!
-Sandy
Can we say that SHOES from Texas are dumb???!!!
-Patrick
Toasted Almonds? That's unexpected!

-Frycook Games Announcer
SOAP...SOAP...WHAT IS SOAP?

-Spongebob
Yeah, uhh...I'm with the pet hospital down the street and I understand you have a dying animal on the premises..."
-Doctor
Either you (a) put the dime in me pants, (b) put the dime in me pants, or (c) put the dime in me pants!
-Mr. Krabbs
Do you think she knows the muffin man song?

-Patrick
The sky had a baby from my cereal box!
-Spongebob
What's a Texas?
-SpongeBob SquarePants
I'm a dirty boy.
-Spongebob
He washed my flipper!
-Pearl
Dreams DO come true!
-Spongebob
Gary: Meow. Sbsp: Gary. Where's your holiday spirit? Gary: Bark!
-Gary Spongebob
(Singing) I'm Squidward! I'm Squidward! I'm Squidward! Squidward! Squidward!
-Patrick
People Order Our Pattys!
-what POOP stands for
There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with fright in the middle of the night, to find that his dream had come true!
-Gary
Meow-no!
-Gary
Squidward: "Spongebob I have a confusion to make[takes off hat]"
SpongeBob: "your bald?!"
Squidward: "NO I'M NOT BALD, I'M ALIVE!!! NOW GET RID OF THIS TOMBSTONE AND TELL YOUR FRIENDS TO GO HOME!"
-SpongeBob and Squidward
Oh dear, my poor old heart!
-Mrs. Krabs
Water balls! Water balls!
-Spongebob and Patrick
You ate my candy bar! Now I'm gonna starve! *zoom in on huge stomach*
-Patrick
Knoch knoch.
Who's there?
*snicker*I am!
-SpongeBob & Squidward
Krabs is a *bleep*
-Spongebob
Oh, but don't genuises live in a lamp?
-Patrick
Spongebob (thinking): "At least I'm safe inside my mind!" Patrick (thinking): "At least I'm safe inside my mind!"
-Spongebob and Patrick
Sandy: Did somebody say BOOM?!
-Sandy
What has four wings and flies? A garbage truck!
-Sandy
Pearl: You bought me a boat? Mr. Krabs: I did? I mean, I did??
-Pearl Mr. Krabs
(after seeing SpongeBob naked) Nice outfit, SpongeBob.
-Squidward
What does Claustrophobic mean?' 'It means you're afraid of Santa Claus.
-Patrick SpongeBob
Patrick: (eyes get big) Hey, Spongebob look! Your house is gone!
-Patrick
Squidward, if you had some hair you would be the handsomest creature in the sea!
-Squidward
Squidward (to magic conch): Can I have something to eat? No. Can I have something to eat? No. Can I have something to eat? No. Can't you say anything else but no? Try asking again. Caaan I have something to eat? No-oh.
-Squidward
Patrick, if I had one dollar for every brain you don't have, I'd have one dollar.
-Squidward
Some day, with a little luck, and a tiny pinch of magic, all your dreams will come true!
-Spongebob
Sandy's a girl?
-Patrick
No, Gary. I like wearing my underwear like this!
-Spongebob
the roof leaks, the floor creaks, there's a wild man eating clam in the backyard
-spongebob pretending to be squidward
I'm a winner, see my prize. You're a loser who sits and cries!
-Squidward
Patrick:Games? Can I play? Spongebob: Sorry, Patrick. You have to be a frycook.
-Spongebob and Patrick
No Gary, I don't get colds I get the suds.
-Spongebob
Spongebob:I call this, the 'Campfire song Song'. Let's sit around the camfire and sing our campfire song. Our c-a-m-p-f-i-r-e s-o-n-g song. And if you don't think you can sing faster then you're wrong. Cause it'll help if you just sing
-Spongebob and Patrick
Nobody calls me tubby!
-Patrick
The inner contents of my mind are an enigma. (In Patrick's thought bubble, a milk carton tips over).
-Patrick
I did'nt want to say this in front of Patrick, but that hat makes you look like a girl.

Am I a pretty girl?
-Mr. Krabs and Spongebob
Smitty Werbenjagermanjensen (???)

He Was #1!
-Spongebob
(singing) .....money better than honey......
-Mr. Krabs
times up spongebob
-gary clock
can we say that shoes from texas are dumb?
-patrick
squidward!....good!
-spongebob(during cmpfire song song)
(about his yellow undies) They were white when I bought 'em.
-Patrick
I like the new Mr. Krabbs; he yells at you more.
-Squidward
a five letter word for happienes...money
-Mr Krabs
Something about Root Beer Right?!
-patrick
All they do is blow, blow , blow their stupid whistles, rub, rub, rub that white stuff on their noses, and show off their GROSS, MISHAPEN, BODIES!!!!!! (Bawoom!)
-Patrick
Dude, put that away! Like, there are children here!
-Some Guy
I'm going to the snack bar.
-Patrick
Wow. A snail made out of bread.
-Patrick
[people hide in patricks house and patrick comes and see's them]
patrick:who are you people?!

-patrick
Am I a pretty girl?
-Spongebob
(Inflates) "Inflatable pants, what's your idea?"
-Patrick
Good Neighbors are we! La la la la la la!
-Patrick/Spongebob
YES I WAS! YOU GUYS ARE THE WORST NEIGHBORS EVER! YOU DONT EVEN DESERVE TO WHERE THOSE FESSES!

NO YOUR NOT! YOU GUYS ARE THE WORSE NEIGHBORS -big breath- AND STOP CALLING ME PRESIDENT!
-Sqidward
Marty. I'm scared!
-Janet
Meep!
-Anchovies
That's not disturbing. THIS is disturbing. (Patrick's back morphs into a face.) Hi, there. Spongebob! My name is Patback!
-Patrick
(looking at bubble elephant) "hahahahahahaha-its a giraffe!
-patrick
Batten down the hatches, Mr. Squidward! We're taking on water,Mr.Squidward! I want my mommy, Mr.Squidward!
-Mr. Krabbs
why did you stop playing wolfgang asmenus Tentacles?!
-Squidward's King From Sleepy Time
(Patrick and Spongebob think of ways to make people buy their candy bars)Patrick: I know! Let's get naked!
Spongebob:No. Let's save that for when we're selling real estate.
-Patrick and Spongebob
Wow! Squidward! You're choking!
-Patrick
Patrick: I love you.
The random stranger slams his door shut. Spongebob knocks.
Random Stranger:Please, g-go away!
-Patrick to a random stranger
Hurry, hurry son
-Spongebob's dad
Mr Krabs:" I'm not Cheap"
Squidward: "you just tried to rip a guy's arm of for a penny"
Patrick: well you have it set to M for Mini *turns it to W* where it should be W for Wumbo!
Spongebob: uh Patrick I don't think Wumbo is a real word
Patrick: yeah you know wumbo,he/she wumbo, wumbo,wumboing,wumbos,wumbology! the study of wumbo! its first grade spongebob!!
Just look at him.Square.The shape of evil!-Plankton describing Spongebob
Spongebob & Patrick: Jellyfishing, jellyfishing!
Plankton: Curse you Krabs!
Strangle:(crying) Look kid I am not your bodyguard. I am a Strangler see.
Spongebob: Oww! I burn my hand ! At night.
Spongebob: Ahhhh the Strangler!
SpongeBob SquarePants: "Hey Squidward want me to cast out right here so you can watch me?"
Squidward: "No! How about you cast out over there so I can ignore you."
Mr. Krabs: Spongeboy, me bob.
Sandy: *To Patrick* "Don't you have to be stupid somewhere else?"
Patrick: "Not until four."
Spongebob: Remember, Patrick...Flatter the customer.
*customer opens the door*
Patrick: I love you.
Karen: Plankton- One percent evil, ninety-nine percent hot gas.
Look Patrick,We Struck Magic! - Spongebob
spongebob:EDUCATIONAL TELEVISON OH NOT AHHHHHHH!!!
Crusty Krab Training Instructor: "P.O.O.P. People Order Our Patties"
Spongebob: Attention customers! Today's special is a (Dolphin Noise) krabby patty served in a greasy (Dolphin Noise) sauce grilled to (Dolphin Noise) perfection! And don't forget to ask to (Dolphin Noise) the (Dolphin Noise) fry! It'll be our (Dolphin Noise) pleasure!
Mr. Krabs: I feel completely recharged!
Spongebob:"Patrick, your genius is showing."
Patrick:"Where!!!"
Now back to KRUD with all of your personal "You won't get away with stealing my car!" hits.-SpongeBob as a car radio
Spongebob: Bye Mr. Krabs Bye Sqiudward, Bye Sqiudward
Patrick: You said bye Squidward twice
Spongebob: I like Squidward
Blue jellyfish: Bzzz bzz bzzzzzzz.
SpongeBob as Hall Monitor: Patrick are you ready to give up your life of crime?!"
Patrick: "I want to be good!"
its a giraffe - patrick
Spongebob: "Hey Squidward. Guess what today is.
Squidward: "Annoy Squidward day?"
Spongebob: "No, silly. That's on the 15th."
Police to Sponge Bob and Patrick: If ya can't pay the time then don't do the crime!...Alright now get out!
Sponge Bob: "but we stole a ballon."
Police: "Yeah on free baloon day."
Nosferatu!!!
-Spongebob, Squidward, new guy applying for a job
I call this little number...striped sweater. *starts to sing* The best time to wear a Striped Sweater, is all the time!
-Spongebob
pinky out!
patrick
Spongeob(to guy that sat on him): "Excuse me sir. You're sitting on my body, which is also my face."
Mr. Krabs: "Course you'll need some time to approximate me personality."
Spongebob: "Oh that'll be a snap,Squidward and I have been doing it behind your back for years! Di-yaya!"

"Wait don't tell me, don't tell me Spongebob! Don't tell me!!!!....Ok, tell me" -Patrick
"Chocolate, did you say Chocolate!?"

"Yes sir! With or without nuts?"

"Chocolate, chocolate!? CHOCOLATE!!!!"

-Patrick and weird random fish
Yep, I'm insane.

-Squidward
ITS AN ALASKIN BULL WORM!!!
-spongebob
Spongebob, stop! Your kindness is bringing everybody back!
Spongebob, stop! Your kindness is bringing everybody back!
-Plankton
Spongbob: We can loosen our ties.
Patrick: Yeah! And we can fly!
Spongebob: YEAH!! *jumps off of a cliff* (in a muffled voice far away) Okay, we still can't do that...
SpongeBob: Patrick, how long have we been standng here?
Patrick:(looks at a drawing of a watch on his wrist) Aww! I gotta draw a new battery for this!
Patrick: Is Sandy the one I call "Mom"?
SpongeBob: No Patrick, that's your mother.
Spongebob: "Squidward, the crowd is insatiable!"
Sandy Cheeks: "So's Patrick's bellybutton, but I ain't afraid of that, neither!"
Patrick Star: "Patrick Star, you are one smart shopper!"
spongebob: Hey patrick, what am I?
patrick: uhhhh stupid?
spongebob: No I'm Texas
patrick:...what's the difference
Patrick: Don't geniuses live in lamps?
Squidward: Will you please stop leaving your undergarments on my front lawn?
Mermaid Man: Now, who wants to save the world?
SpongeBob: I do!
Patrick: I do!
Sandy Cheeks: I do!
Squidward: I don't.
Mr. Krabs: Oh, yes you do, no world means no money, so either save the world, or you're fired!
[Squidward sighs]
SpongeBob SquarePants: I guess Grampa SquarePants was right: Never run for a bus...
[Imitates Grampa SquarePants]
SpongeBob SquarePants: ... especially one that's going up at a 90 degree angle.
[Looking for Squidward in a crowd of squids]
SpongeBob SquarePants: Are you Squidward?
Squid #1: No.
SpongeBob SquarePants: Are you Squidward?
Squid #2: No.
Patrick: [to a fire hydrant] Are you Squidward?
[silence]
Patrick: It's okay. Take your time.
SpongeBob SquarePants: [waiting for the bus] Getting hungry. Glove candy dispenser! Good thing I went to Glove World.
[takes candy from dispenser, then spits it out]
SpongeBob SquarePants: Eww! Glove-flavored.

Fish: Meep
Squidward: Years ago, at this very restaurant, the hatch-slinging slasher used to be a frycook, just like you. Only clumsier! And then, one night, when he was cutting the patties, it happened...
SpongeBob: He forgot the secret sauce?
Squidward: No.
SpongeBob: He didn't wash his hands?
Squidward: No!
SpongeBob: Irregular portions?
Squidward: NO! He cut off his own hand! By mistake!
SpongeBob: You mean like this?
[At every 'this', SpongeBob removes his arm and a new one grows back]
SpongeBob: Or like this? Or this? Or this? But what about this? Or this? Or this? Or this?
Squidward: Except he wasn't a sponge!
SpongeBob: So?
Squidward: So it didn't grow back!
SpongeBob: OH NO!
Squidward: And he replaced his hand... with a rusty spatula. And then... he got hit by a bus! And, as funeral, they fired him! So now... every... What day is it?
SpongeBob: Tuesday.
Squidward: Tuesday night! His ghost returns to the Krusty Krab to wreak his horrible vengeance!

[SpongeBob has a jellyfish on a leash]
SpongeBob SquarePants: Hey, Squidward. Meet my new pet.
Squidward: That's no pet. That's a wild animal.
SpongeBob SquarePants: No he isn't. He can do tricks.
[Throwing a stick]
SpongeBob SquarePants: Fetch!
[Jellyfish fetches stick]
SpongeBob SquarePants: [holding up three fingers] How many fingers am I holding up?
[Jellyfish buzzes three times]
SpongeBob SquarePants: Play dead!
[Jellyfish is buried under a tombstone, then comes out]
Squidward: I wouldn't let that thing in my house even if it was potty-trained.
[Jellyfish is sitting on a toilet, reading the newspaper and humming]
Squidward: I didn't need to see that.
Computer: Plankton: 1% Evil, 99% Hot Gas.
Squilliam: "Where's your band?"
Squidward: "Um, they all died in a marching accident."
Patrick: "Hey, Spongebob, when can we stop hopping?"
Spongebob: "Thirty more seconds Patrick."
Squidward: "I didn't realize it was happy, hopping moron day."
SB: but what about airline food.
Plankton: wha?
SB: ya know, airline food. my gosh! what is up with that stuff, thank you, good night!
- spongebob and plankton
Squidward: Please, come again... on my day off!
*Patrick holding shruunken Squidward*
Squidward: I wonder if a fall from this height would kill me.
Go home. - Spongebob
SpongeBob and Patrick: "Welcome to our club, welcome to our club, welcome Squidward, welcome Squidward, welcome Squidward!"
SpongeBob-Cheer up, Squidward! It could be worse!
Patrick-Yeah! You could be bald and have a big nose!
Patrick, reading his name tag upside down: "Kcirtap Si Eman Ym 077eh? I don't get it."
Mr. Krabs: "No, you dumb bunny, it says, 'Hello, My name is Patrick'."
Patrick: "Nice to meet you, Patrick."
Mr. Krabs: (laughs) "Good one, Patrick."
Patrick: (laughs) "Yeah."
SpongeBob: "What is going on here? The laughter isn't scheduled till 9:03. If you want to throw a party, do it at your house, Patrick!"
Patrick: "Was he talking to me or you?"



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2 comments

user photo
laugh
LOL Funnah!!!
posted over a year ago.
 
user photo
meh
WTF
posted over a year ago.