Another request from a fellow SE shipper :) This time I will be talking about what really differentiates those two scenes from each other and which one really has its spell over us.

With Stefan and Elena— they did make love in this scene but I won’t be talking about that specific part just to stay on par with Damon and Elena’s scene since they did not go that far in their scene. Just want to keep it fair.

So let’s get down to it. There are really two factors that greatly show the contrast between the two scenes. That’s atmosphere, and the emotional dynamic. With Damon and Elena’s scene there was something that felt a little shady, or cheap. Now I don’t mean to say that to hate on the writers, or the characters but it didn’t have a lot of class. Something tells me it wasn’t really supposed to. The kiss took place outside of a hotel, and in the back ground there were flourecent lights flickering. Damon had his shirt undone, and they ended up against a wall and just giving themselves over to the pure, physical excitement. That was your atmosphere. Something about it just screamed that it was dirty, or wrong. It was about an itch she...

Kevin Williamson: This is a story about Stefan and Elena’s love story. I think it’s fun to watch the twists and turns that we take. Because you know what? She doesn’t know.

Julie Plec: I can only say that it’s a show predicated on a girl coming back to life and her development of love for one brother who then, because of who she is, changes the life of the other brother and that’s our show.

Kevin Williamson: Is she single right now? Elena is always, no matter how single she is, she’s still standing there with Stefan.

Kevin Williamson: The thing that works so well about this show is that’s a serialized mythology genre love story. It’s about these two lost souls, these two dead souls, one human and one a vampire, who are together, their love for each other brings them back to life. I mean that’s epic.

Julie Plec: We always said in the pilot it’s a girl who feels dead inside and a boy who is dead inside and how they bring each other back to life.

The argument that Damon is better for Elena because he’ll do anything to keep her alive, even sacrificing her loved ones etc, is quite sad. Elena isn’t an animal that’s going to be extinct. She’s a human being. She can’t have a bodyguard follow her around 24/7, she can’t live her life being told what to do and what decisions to make. She might as well go to prison, because that’s exactly how Damon treats her. Like an object/prisoner, like HIS toy. At the end of the day Elena is a grown woman, who’s had more happen to her than a middle aged adult. She is capable of making her own choices and living her life the way she wants. And If Damon doesn’t understand or respect that, then he cannot possibly love Elena. He can’t tell her where to go, what not to do, who to see. She may as well not be living, because that isn’t living. That’s why Stefan will always be best for Elena. He doesn’t treat her like an object/baby and control her. He allows her to live her life the way she wants, even if he doesn’t agree, because it’s HER life. He encourages her to live and do normal things, despite the chaos going on around them.