Disclaimer: I do not own the characters, just the idea.

A/N: Please, please, please… review! I need some feedback! I want to know that you guys like this story and want more. Please review!



Chapter 5


Oh my god! What was that dream about? Why was he staring at me like that and why did he lunge at me like he did? What did it mean? I mean it was just a dream but it felt so real. It was so vivid; I could feel his breath on my face, and his hands on my shoulders.

I looked around and noticed that I was once again in Alice’s room. I have no idea how I got up here. I can only assume that Edward brought me up. I looked over to the clock on the nightstand and it was just after 5:00 in the morning. Not too early to be up I guess, but I didn’t know if anyone else was up. I tiptoed to the door, opened it up and listened for voices.

“I have to be to the hospital for six this morning so I need to leave soon,” I heard Carlisle said. “But they all understand that if Bella needs me, I will leave.”

“She is doing very well considering everything she’s had to go through,” Rosalie said.

“Yeah, she is. I would never have guessed it,” Emmett said.

Were they having a family meeting about me? Do they always wake up so early?

“I’m sure that Alice or Edward can keep her busy and keep her mind busy too,” Esme said. She truly felt that I was going to be fine, even I could hear that.

So where was Alice, Edward, and Jasper? I hadn’t heard them say anything. Where would they have gone to so early or were they just sleeping still? I was sleeping in Alice’s room, so where was she sleeping? In Jasper’s room?

Just then I hear Carlisle walk out of the kitchen where they were all talking and walk into the living rook to the front door. I softly moved away from Alice’s door so he wouldn’t see me and wouldn’t know that I had overheard them. I heard the front door open and close softly.

Now I wasn’t so sure that I wanted to get up and join the rest of the Cullen’s. I didn’t really feel like having someone babysit me. I didn’t want to have them watching to see when I was going to crack up and start to fall apart. Losing my parents was very hard and I knew that it was going to be a long time until I was going to be able to really feel normal again, but when I was around everyone here I was going to be strong. Or at least act like I was. Hopefully I can pull that off.

With my time awake and deciding not to go downstairs, I figured now was as good as time as any to sit and just be me. Just be Bella, if I knew who Bella was anymore. I don’t know how long I was sitting here alone but I was starting to not feel so bad. I don’t know that any thoughts came into my head or not, but I know that I felt better. Stronger. It felt like I could start moving forward with some things. I knew then that I needed to go back home. I needed to face what my life used to be like.

Okay, I thought to myself; now that you have that figured out, get yourself dressed and start piecing your life back together! A small, pitiful laugh escaped as I thought of me yelling at myself. I got up with a smile still on my face and got dressed. I knew then that I wasn’t going to sleep my pain away; I was going to face it head on. I got dressed in a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt that I found in my bag that Alice packed for me. I also found my favorite pair of tennis shoes. I brushed out my hair and threw it up in a ponytail.

With a confident air to me, I opened the door and went out. I walked down the stairs to see where everyone was so I could get a ride to my house. I found Rosalie.

”Hi Rosalie. Would you be able to do a big favor for me?”

She looked up for the book that she was reading. “Sure, I can do that. What did you need?”

“I just need a lift to my house. I think it is time for me to get some things done there.”

She blinked at me like she didn’t fully understand what I had said. But then she said, “Yes, I can bring you. Do you want Esme or Alice to go with you though?”

“Um… I don’t think I need anyone’s help. But thank you.” I was going to go through some of the most needed stuff right away. I needed to get rid of old food, sort through the mail, return the hundreds of calls that I was sure was on the machine at home, and I didn’t need help with that.

“Okay, I will just let them know where I am heading and I can take you.” She got up and walked out to the back door that leads to the back yard, where Esme must be. A short time later she walked back in with a smile on her face. “Alright, ready?”

“Yes. I am,” I said. I let out a breath that I didn’t know I was holding. I was ready for this. I had steeled myself up for it and I was ready.

We walked out the front door and out to the big garage. I had expected Rosalie to go to the Volvo that I’ve only even seen the Cullen’s driving, but I was wrong. She headed straight to a bright red convertible. Wow! What a car. That has to be Carlisle’s.
“We are taking this?” I asked her astonished.

“Yes. It’s my car. Isn’t it great? I love it, but dad doesn’t want me to show off so much so I always have to ride with Edward in his car. But I think this one suits me better. Don’t you think?”

“I do. This is totally your kind of car.” I laughed. It was a true laugh and one that I haven’t had in days. It felt good. “Thank you for helping me Rosalie. It is really kind of your family to help me out like this. I don’t know what I would have done if I didn’t have all of you.”

“No problem, love. That’s what we’re here for. To help you,” she laughed. Why had I never noticed that she was so spirited before? She always seemed so distant to me. I guess a lot can happen when you open your eyes and see what is right in front of you.

We got into the car and she pulled out of the garage. “Put your seatbelt on.” I got it on just as she floored the car. I was thrown back in my seat and she was going so fast that I don’t know how she didn’t hit a tree. The way she wound around the driveway to get to the road was insane. Finally we hit the road and I thought she would be safer, but nope. She kept right on going as fast as she was before, maybe even faster. No wonder she had that smile on her face before. She knew that she was getting to drive her car and drive it fast.

We got to my house in record time and I had to pry my fingers from the door that I was hanging onto. I was white knuckled the whole way and it only took 10 minutes instead of 30 minutes that it usually took me. Rosalie looked to me once and laughed at the look on my face. She said that it was perfectly safe, but I couldn’t feel that way. As she pulled into the driveway and shut off the car, I was ready to be on ground that was not moving.

I looked up at the house that was once a safe haven to me; a place where I could get away from everything in life. Now I didn’t see that place; I don’t know if it exists anymore. Rosalie walked to the front door with me. I put my hand on the doorknob to see that it was unlocked. Why should it be locked anyway? There was nothing left here. I went inside and just stood there looking around the living room, reliving a thousand different memories that I know cherished.

All of those birthdays, the birthday parties, the Christmases, Easters, New years, and so many more that I saw flash in my memory. I saw all of my school pictures hung on the wall and I watched myself grow up and how much I’ve changed. I saw my mom and dad’s wedding picture and the bright and happy smiles on their faces. The look of hope was also apparent, as they knew that they were going to have a happy life together. So many things were flooding me that I had to sit down.

Rosalie came up to me, “Are you okay Bella?”

“Yes,” I said in a whisper. “I am fine. A lot of memories just flooded back and it was hard to have to stand up in front of them.”

“Are you sure that you don’t want anyone here with you? I could call Esme, it wouldn’t be any trouble,” she said with her cell phone already in hand.

“No. I will be fine. I promise. And tell Esme that I will call her when I am done. You have all been so great. I am sure that I have a hundred calls to make anyway.”

“Alright. Well call if you need anyone here and we will be here in a flash.”

I laughed at that. “I am sure. You drive like a maniac, Rosalie, as anyone ever told you that?”

She smiled at that. “Nope, you’re the first one. But I will let you be so you can get your things done. Give us a call when you are finished and we will come and get you, okay?”

“I will. Thank you Rosalie.” With that she smile a little and left.

I went to the kitchen and looked at the answering machine and indeed there were a lot of calls on there. I listened to a few of them who were my parents friends saying how sorry they were and then I heard one that I wasn’t really expecting to hear. It was Jacob. I hadn’t spoken to him in years. Not that we had a fight or anything; we just grew apart. His father and my father were good friends and always went fishing together. He asked that I call him back when I had the chance.

I dialed his number right away. It rang a few times and then I heard, “Hello?”

It was Jacob! “Hi Jacob, it’s Bella. I just got your message. I was surprised to hear from you. It’s been a long time.”

“Bella,” he almost sighed my name. “It’s damn good to hear your voice. How are ya holding up?”

“I’m getting there. I am just now getting to things at the house that needed to be taken care of. My first thing is to return phone calls that need to be returned.”

“Would you like some company? I can come over if you’d like.”

Did I want Jacob to come over? It took me two seconds to decide. “Yeah, come on over. The door is unlocked, just let yourself in.”

“Okay. I will be right over. I’ll just write a note to dad telling him where I went.”

“Okay, see you in a bit, Jake. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome. See you in a bit Bells.”

After we hung up, I listened to a few more of my parents’ friends saying that they were sorry and a few of my friends from school say that they were sorry. School. I hadn’t thought about school. I’m sure that the Cullen’s have all of that figured out for me like they figured out everything else. I will have to ask about that.

I dialed Angela’s number. Her mom answered and said that she was sorry for my loss but Angela was not there. I asked her to call me at the Cullen’s when she had time. She said that she would. The next person I called with Mike. Mike’s mom answered and she said that she would get him for me.

“Hello? Bella, is this really you?”

“Yeah, it’s me Mike.”

“Oh my god. How are you doing?”

“I’m getting through it. Thanks for calling. I just tried Angela too and she was out, but I just wanted to get in touch with you. I am doing well. I think I will be staying with Alice Cullen’s family for awhile though.”

“Oh, right. Do you know when you are going to be coming back to school? I know everyone will be happy to see you back.”

“I’m not sure yet. Things are a little all over the place for me right now.”

“Oh yeah. Sure. Well if you need anything, let me know, okay?”

“Okay, I will.” I said. I heard the door open. I peered around the corner to look into the living room. Jake was here. “I have to go Mike. Will you let everyone know that I will call them when I get a chance?”

“Of course. Take it easy Bella.”

“Bye.” I said. Whew. A few calls done.

Jacob walked into the kitchen and before he said anything he grabbed me into a huge bear hug. “Uh, Jake, I can’t breathe.”

He let go. “Oh sorry. I am just so happy to see you.”

“Thanks Jake. I am fine, but if you hug me like that again, I may have some broken ribs. When did you get so big?”

“Well you haven’t seen me in awhile. And I think it’s in the water over in La Push, because there are a bunch of us that are big.” He said with a smile.

“It’s good to see you. Want to help with something?”

“Sure, what do you want me to do?”

“Well… you could empty out the fridge. It needs to be done and I am sure that it isn’t going to be pleasant,” I said.

He didn’t complain at all as he emptied out the refrigerator. I sat at the table and sorted through all of the mail. There were a ton of sympathy cards in there, but also bills. Oh man, what was I going to do about those. I was so lost with all of this. I was going to need Carlisle and Esme’s help with this. When I threw out all of the junk mail and kept all of the bills and cards, I called Esme and told her that I needed help with the bills.

“Oh, don’t worry about that sweetheart. We will get all of that figured out for you. Are you close to needing to come back home?”

Home. Wasn’t I home? Is that not going to be my home anymore? What was going to happen with my house? Oh I didn’t want to think about that yet.

“Um… sort of. I have a friend here helping me out a little. I want to get some more of my things together. So maybe in about a half an hour?”

“Alright, I will have Alice and Edward come and help you get your things,” she said.

“Thanks Esme. I’ll see you soon.”

We hung up and I looked back to Jake. When did he get so tall? He had to be almost 7 feet tall!

”So… Alice and Edward are going to be coming soon to help me get my things to bring to their house.”

“Oh. I see. I had better leave soon,” Jacob said.

“Oh no, you don’t have to leave yet. Unless you want to of course.”

“Sure, sure. Why not? It might be interesting.” What he meant by that I didn’t know. But he followed me up to my room and watched me pack some more of my things. Sooner than I thought I heard Edward and Alice in the kitchen and coming up the steps.

“Hey guys. Jake and I are up here, in my room.”

I heard them coming up the stairs and were soon in my room. All of a sudden the air sizzled with tension. All I saw was a blur of colors in my room and a few seconds later there was only Edward and Alice standing in my room and they looked furious. For what reason I couldn’t understand. And where was Jacob?

“What is going on in here Bella?” Edward asked. He looked ready to explode. I looked to Alice who also looked like she was about ready to start her own shouting match. What was going on? What caused them to look at me so fierce?