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A day with the cullens chpt. 4

Fan fiction by twilightchick posted over a year ago
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DAY 3
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Alice: *giggles*
edward: ali, whats so funny?
alice: oh its nothing *busts out laughing*
bella: *asks cautiously* what is it alice?
alice: my vision. i can see that you and edward are going to have a problem and it just played out for me
bella: oh-no..
alice: oh yes, edward will tell you what he just saw
edward: bella, love we better get out of here..
bella: whats going on?.... Alice Cullen you better tell me whats going on before i get the box!
alice: oh so scary *rolls her eyes* mike is coming!
bella: AHHH GET ME OUTTA HERE!!
jasper: *door rings* i'll get it! *smiling as he walks to the door*
bella: NO WAIT TIL I GET OUT! *tries to get out the back door*
*jasper answers the door*
mike: BELLA, BABY WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
bella; away from you
*mike steps in*
edward *jumps in front of him and growls*
mike: bella, babay why are you here at the cullens, you need to be home with me.
bella: excuse me! im married and thank the lord it aint to you
mike: oh baby dont be like that
edward: she can be how ever she wants to be and stop with this baby crap, she aint your baby!
mike: YES SHE IS! YOU WANNA FIGHT FOR HER CULLEN!
edward:WHY FIGHT WHEN I ALREADY HAVE HER!
mike: you dont have her! bella, baby, tell him that you belong to me, now hun who are you married to? *smiles cause he thinks she gonna say his name*
bella:FIRST OF ALL, IM NOT YOUR BABY,HUN, OR WHATEVER PET NAME YOU GOT. SECOND, IM MARRIED TO EDWARD ABD IM FOREVER HIS. GOT IT DOG?!
edward: did you understand that newton!
mike: *laughs* she got an imagination doesnt she! com on baby, lets get you home. you need a few hours in my room, with some champainge, and some sexy pjs *reaches for her*
UGH! DONT TOUCH ME! *slaps mike*
mike: oo i like them fiesty
edward: *graps mike by the shirt* TOUCH HER AGAIN AND I WILL NEUTER YOU!
mike: well i geuss im going to die tonight because me and bella have a appointment to intend to *winks at bella*
bella: *glares* kill him.
edward: GLADLY!
carlise: no edward dont!
mike: *while edward is talking to carlisle, he runs and tackles bella and tries to kiss her* come one baby, one little kiss..
bella: * holding his face away from hers*
EDWARD HELP ME!
edward: HOLD ON LOVE IM COMING! * charges with on of those star wars light up sword and yells like tarzan* (srry i know he wouldnt do that but work with us here..)
bella: oh lord.
mike: oh like thats going to do anything* leans down and tries kissing her again8
bella: ugh, im tired of this. GET OFF ME! *knocks him out* GET OUT MY FACE! GET OUT MY HOUSE< GET OUT MY LIFE BEFORE I BITCH SLAP YOU TO MEXICO!
*yells and fumes*
edward: THERE YOU GO LOVE!
mike: i thought you loved me? * cries* thats fine i'll give you some space then i'll come back next week
bella: *asks cautiously* when next week?
mike: or could i come back tomorrow love?
bella: oh yea sure.. NOW GET OUT! *kicks mike outside and slams the door* edward, you're taking me somewhere far away tomorrow, i dont care where just away from here!
edward: hang on * runs outside* NOW IF YOU EVER COME BACK HERE I WILL HURT YOU ABD YOUR FAMILY!
mike: * runs screaming like a girl* MOMMY!
edward: *chuckles and comes in and sits by bella*
bella: oh finally he's gone! im stressed. wanna go "color"? (a/n: its the same thing as checkers)
edward: heck yes love! *grabs bella and runs to the cottage*
alice: well thre they go.. *gives jasper a look*
jasper: *looks back*
alice: you wanna do something?
jasper: *runs and grabs alice and runs up the stairs*
alice: baby. thats not what i meant
jasper: aww man! * walks back down the stairs and sets her down* what did you mean?
emmett: *walks in* hey everyone
alice: i wanna go SHOPPING!hey emmett.
emmett: OMGH! I WANNA GO TOO! I FOUND THE CUTEST SHOES THAT WOULD LOOK GREAT ON ME AND YOU< BECAUSE OF OUR BODY SHAPES GURL!. THE GUYS WOULD KILL TO GET US!
rosalie: ummmm....awkward
emmett: THE ONLY THING THATS AWKWARD IN THIS ROOM IS YOUR CUP SIZE! HUN GIVE IT UP, YOU CANT WEAR THOSE BRAS, BECAUSE YOU ARE JUST SAGGING!
rosalie: UH EXCUSE ME, YOU AINT THE ONE TO TALK CAUSE WITH YOUR SAGGY MAN BOOBS, YOU NEED A SIZE 44D!
emmett: EQUEZZE ME? I FIT INTO A SIZE 49B, SO UGH MISS 99C!
rosalie: *looks shocked*
emmett: *shakes his head* JASPER STOP MESSING WITH MY EMOTIONS< IT AINT MY FAULT YOU CANT GET SOME!! rose baby im sorry!
rosalie: WHATEVER DONT BLAME THAT ON JASPER! FOR YOUR PUNISHMENT IM GETTING THE BOX! SO GRAP YOUR DUCKY!
emmett: rose i love you please! jasper tell her!
jasper* staring into alice's eyes*
emmett: smacks the back of jasper's head* TELL HER YOU EMO PERSON! (a/n: we nothing against emo people)
alice: he isnt emo and how could he do that to your emotions whens he's busy looking at me and every thought he has had right now is about me!
emmett: what now you can read minds?!
alice: *still looking at jasper* no edward told me
jasper: its true!
emmett: EDWARD IS AT THE COTTAGE GETTING HIS GROOVE ON, WHY WOULD HE CARE WHAT YALL ARE DOING?! GOSH I SWEAR YOU GUYS ARE NUTS!
alice: * snaps her head up* WHAT?! DUDE IM NOT NUT ! AND HE'S NOT GETTING HIS GROOVE ON!
emmett: uh-huh!
alice: prove it!
emmett: go look!
alice: i rather not..
emmett: yes you would! * pushes her to the cottage*
alice: NO EMMETT!
emmett: bella looks so sexy when shes naked
rosalie: THATS IT EMMETT GET IN THE DARN BOX.... AFTER YOU PROVE THAT TO ALICE!
alice: NO PLEASE DONT!
emmett: * pushes her through their bedroom*
alice: *covers her eyes* no emmett!
bella: AHHH ALICE WHAT ARE YOU DOING!
alice: *still has her hands over her eyes* im sorry bella emmett pushed me in here..
rosalie: edward cover up!
edward: no this is my house, i can run around naked if i wanted to! if you dont like it then you can leave!
rosalie* sits on the end of the bed*
edward: rosalie get off my bed! alice leave your interrupting things1
alice: im sorry its not like i wanted to be dragged here! * runs outside*
bella: IF YOU DONT LIVE HERE GET OUT!
*rose leaves*
emmett: * starring at bella* ummm bella....your sheet ....fell...wow you have a great bod..
edward: GET OUT!
emmett: NO YOU JUST GET IT OVER WITH AND PUT SOME CLOTHES ON!
bella: AHHH1 I'VE JUST BEEN VIOLATED!! GET OUT!!
emmett: * chuckles and pulls the sheet off of bella and edward* WHOO HOO!
bella and edward: AHH CARLISLE! ESME! EMMETT IS INTERRUPTING OUR COLORING SESSION AND VIOLATING ME(BELLA)
edward: YEA OUR COLORING PAGE GOT INTERRUPTED AND DRWN ON BY THE UGLIEST PEN EVER (emmett)
bella: eddy poo i dont want him to see me naked..
emmett: too lake. and bella you're fine! no wonder eddt here always want to tap that!
bella: well thanks but GET OUT!
emmett: how many times a week? *winks*
rosalie: oh emmett. the box is ready for you! emmett: im busy right now!
edward: why are you worried about it? go play with rosalie or something
emmett: i want to know if you're good or not
rosalie: EMMETT! GET YOU AND YOUR SAGGY MAN BOOBS HERE NOW!
emmett: NO! AND THEY'RE NOT SAGGY, THY ARE PERFECTLY PERKY!
rosalie: ewww...
bella: hes better than you.*mumbles* for a one-hundred and eight year old virgin
edward: hey im not that anymore!
emmett: how many times?!
edward: if i tell you will you get out?
emmett: sure
edward: everyday...now get out!
emmett: NICE!
bella: emmett,get out before i call jessica and lauren on you *grins evilly*
emmett: IM OUT!
edward: thank you! *to bella*
now where were we?... i think i know * smiles*
* 2 hours later*
bella: we need to check on nessie
edward: cant it wait?
bella: maybe later honey
edward: you're right, but i dont want us to be done, but its a wise decision* hurries and gets dressed* love why dont you get dressed
bella: ok *stands in the closet* um i dont know what to wear..
edward: her let me help * sniffs out blue jeans and a t-shirt* i want my girl to be comfortable* hands her the clothes*
bella: aww thanks honey* kisses him passionly*
nessie: * walks by the room* EWWW I'VE BEEN SCARRED!AHH! *runs off*
edward: umm love.. i think we just scarred our little girl...i think its time for the talk
bella: the talk?! he's just a baby!
edward: she's 10.
bella: fine* walks out the room* nessie your dad wants to talk to you
* nessie walks into the room cautiously and 10 minutes later*
bella: * walks back in the room* how'd it go?
nessie: * her face is blank*
edward: i think it went well.. i just hope she understands it..
*emmett walks in eating a banana*
nessie: AHHH!
bella: calm down baby! * calms her* you used the banana example didnt you edward?
edward: maybe..
*rosalie walks in eating a corndog*
nessie: AHHHHHH!
* jasper walks in eating a doughnut*
nessie: OH MY GOSH AHHHHHHHH!*runs out the room*
bella: you used the food example?! that a bad way to explain that kind of stuff! oh my poor baby, she's scarred for life now.
nessie: *from her room* YEAH I AM!
bella:...... why are you all eating human food anyway?..
emmett, jasper, and rosalie: we felt like it
bella: okay...
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heres chapter 4 and day 3. hope you enjoyed it! =)

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11 comments

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big smile
OMG!
That was FUN-NY!
Keep going!
posted over a year ago.
 
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smile
THAT WAS FUNNY WITH MIKE COMING AND THE END WITH EDWARD GIVING NESSIE THE TALK. WHENS THE NEXT ONE COMING OUT????????
posted over a year ago.
 
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laugh
OMG! I have to ask again, is it possible to die of laughing! Please write another one! I LOVE EDWARD CULLEN!!!!!!
posted over a year ago.
 
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smile
ok i'll try to write another one but i really dont know when
posted over a year ago.
 
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big smile
Whiskey37 said:
LOL!!!! awsome!!!!
posted over a year ago.
 
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The light-up swords from Star Wars are called light sabers...
Uhh. those aren't actual bra sizes
posted over a year ago.
 
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laugh
haha yeah i actually just learned that 3 weeks ago lol and we know
posted over a year ago.
 
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laugh
LOL! I LOVE IT! I just laughed my head off for a straight 22 miniutes! I am like gsping for air right now!! LOL too funny!!!!
posted over a year ago.
 
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big smile
LOL LOL LOL LOL I CAN'T STOP LAUGHING :P
posted over a year ago.
 
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COULD THIS GET ANY FUNNIER
posted over a year ago.
 
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laugh
OMG that is funny write more. I love it when edward gives nessie the talk. and when emment and them eat the food
posted over a year ago.