On January 1st, 1987, the world was graced with the first edition of the Japanese manga, Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure: Phantom Blood. 30 years later, in 2017, Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure is still going strong. In fact, it’s even stronger today than it has ever been, and I am happy for that. So, to celebrate the 30th anniversary of Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure, I am going to make the month of January an event known only as Jojo-nuary, where I will be making many lists associated with Jojo. And to start this event off, I am going to introduce you all to the ranking of Stands from the fifth edition of Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure, Vento Aureo or Golden Wind. Now, while Vento Aureo wasn’t appreciated very well in the west for poor translation and Giorno’s character, I still loved it, mainly because of it’s lack of bad Stands. This part definitely had more good Stands than bad Stands, and I am okay with that. So, with that, let’s start the ranking of all of the Vento Aureo Stands.

Rank 17: Rolling Stone (Used by Scolippi)

When this Stand was introduced, right near the end of Vento Aureo, I didn’t really feel like it was necessary. And yeah… I was right. This Stand has no fighting strength, no interesting moves, nothing. All Rolling Stone has is that, whenever a person is destined to die, it will allow the person to die a painless death. However, if they continue to refuse the Rolling Stone, than it will leave, suggesting that the person wishes to die painfully. The only reason this Stand was created was because (Major spoiler) It was coming after Bucciarati and was made to predict his fate near the end of the manga. By this point, we were already aware of what would happen to Bucciarati, so by this point, Rolling Stone was just there to show how strong the group wanted to survive. That is about it, really. I felt that Rolling Stone was just real pointless and was not really a necessary thing to have at the end. Maybe there was more to it, but I honestly couldn’t care to see.

Rank 16: Talking Head (Used by Tiziano)

Now we go from one pointless Stand to a less pointless but still pretty bad Stand. Talking Heads is a Stand that has no means of fighting at all. Instead, it has an ability that makes it kind of unique but pretty pointless. Talking Head is able to latch onto a person’s tongue and, once on, the person it is attached to cannot tell the truth. So, say that you are in danger, and someone asks if you are okay. Instead of telling them that you are danger, Talking Head will make you say that you are okay and that you are in no danger at all. You will be aware of what you said, but will have no way of saying this. You can’t write it out either, as Talking Head will make you write the lie down as well. I can at least admire Talking Head for it’s ability and how it uses them, so it gets points for that. Unfortunately, Talking Head does nothing much after that, and doesn’t do anything else after that. Not to mention, he is defeated in such a simple way. Enemy Stand users are always defeated because the character outsmart them. Here, Narancia just shoots at Tiziano and finds his breathing. That’s about it, sadly. Talking Head. Lots of potential, but potential is all it was.

Rank 15: Mr. President (Used by Coco Jumbo)

Now, I can at least say that Mr. President was useful for giving the group a place to hide, and use Mr. President to their advantage. Plus, it’s used by a turtle, so that just makes it better. But sadly, Mr. President just lacks in so much that makes a good Stand. So, Mr. President has only one simple ability. Mr. President has a key that, when inserted into the special place on the shell of Coco Jumbo, it will create a room inside the turtle shell and allow the person to enter. Inside the room is plenty of furniture, a fully functioning television, and a refrigerator, complete with drinks. The only thing that this room lacks is a bathroom. The room is able to keep the group safe from the many assassins that hunt them throughout the manga, and it definitely has it’s uses. Sadly, that is about it. Mr. President is really just a way to keep the group from dying. It doesn’t get truly interesting until Jean Pierre Polnareff comes onto the scene. I won’t spoil what, but let’s say that when you do see it, you’ll understand those Polnareff turtle jokes. Anyway, Mr. President. Good for the group, and nothing much else.

Rank 14: Clash (Used by Squalo)

Now this is where the Stands get interesting. Clash is a very small Stand, and can create it’s size depending on what liquid it is in. Since Clash is a shark, it is only limited to liquids, but that just makes it all the more dangerous. No matter what the liquid may be, whether it be a pool of water, a puddle, or even a glass of wine. Whenever it is in these bodies of liquid, it will shrink it’s entire body down to fit in it. However, this doesn’t change how strong it is, as, no matter what the liquid may be, it can grab hold of it’s target like that of a real shark, and drag them through the liquid, as shown when it dragged Giorno through multiple puddles. Clash is a Stand that not a lot of people talk about and I don’t know why. It certainly has a lot of good ideas behind it, but just wasn’t shown that much. That, plus it was shown along with Talking Head. I understand that both of these Stands were limited in their abilities, but that didn’t stop Clash from being an interesting Stand… I can’t say the same for Talking Head though.

Rank 13: Little Feet (Used by Formaggio)

Little Feet is a very interesting Stand. It does have an ability that I am not exactly the most interesting in, but I felt that it was used very well. Now, I am not the biggest fan of the ability to shrink in size, but, like I said, I really did enjoy how Little Feet did it. Anyway, in case you couldn’t guess, Little Feet has the ability to shrink. Not just the user, but it’s target too. When Little Feet slices anyone with it’s sharp index finger, they will begin to gradually shrink in size, even to the point of being microscopic. Once they are of this size, the user of Little Feet is able to use their small size to do what he pleases, whether it be to torture them or just kill them right there. Little Feet is also able to shrink the user in size, and can control it unlike that of its targets. Now, I do have to say that, since Little Feet was the first Stand to be used by the first of the assassins to be introduced, it had a lot to live up to, by introducing just how ruthless the assassin group was, and I think that it did it’s job. Sure, as I’ve said before, I don’t like the idea of people shrinking, but I also said that Little Feet did it in such an interesting way, that it kept me reading the whole way through. So, good work on their part.

Rank 12: Beach Boy (Used by Pesci)

I never thought that you could make something like a fishing rod interesting, but, unsurprisingly, Araki found a way. Beach Boy is just a simple fishing rod used by the cowardly Pesci. This was the moment that showed how interesting the villains were. They weren’t just another obstacle in the characters way. They had emotions too. But, enough about that. Let’s get back to why Beach Boy is great for a fishing rod. So, Beach Boy does what a normal fishing rod does. It catches it’s target and pulls them forward. However, it does even more. Beach Boy can sense when a target is nearby and, in a sense, swim towards them to hook them and allowing the user to reel them in like a fish. And it isn’t just limited to going around solid objects. Beach Boy is able to move through solid objects like walls and even human flesh and can go for miles, as long as the string of the rod is there. It also cannot take any damage. Once a person is hooked onto Beach Boy, if they try to attack it, all the damage will be directed toward them and hurt them, as if they aren’t in any more pain. Honestly, this is a pretty surprising Stand. I suspected Beach Boy to be a really dull Stand, but it was used just too well. And when a fishing rod is a great Stand, than that just shows what Stands in Vento Aureo you are in for.

Rank 11: Notorious B.I.G. (Used by Carne)

Every time I hear about this Stand, everyone talks about how terrible it would be to have this Stand. And yeah, I understand. But the Stand itself is actually pretty interesting. So, Notorious B.I.G. is a Stand that is immortal. It cannot die, no matter what you do. Now, that may sound pretty cool and make you wonder how people would hate to have a Stand like this. Well, in order for the Stand to even be activated, there’s one thing the user must do. The user has to die for it to work… Yep. When the user has a grudge against the target, such as being killed, then it will allow Notorious B.I.G. to come out and kill the targets. This is when it shows how powerful it really is. As I said, Notorious B.I.G. cannot be killed. It is immune to all attacks, since the user is to be dead, they cannot be killed again to kill the Stand. This is hacks if I’ve ever seen it. Notorious B.I.G. is also able to control the parts of people like that of Talking Head, only it can allow them to do more than just lie. Notorious B.I.G. has one disadvantage at least. It can only spot people through how quickly they move. They faster they are, the easier Notorious B.I.G can find them, and will rush toward them to kill them. Notorious B.I.G. was so OP, they just dumped him in the ocean to get rid of him because of how powerful he is. Yeah, I would never want this Stand, but it is definitely not a Stand to take lightly.

Rank 10: Soft Machine (Used by Zucchero)

Soft Machine was the one of the two Stands that users were attacking other members of Passione and were the one of the two to actually survive an attack from the protagonists. Not that they didn’t get beaten badly, but still. Soft Machine has the ability to deflate a human like a tire by stabbing them with the sword that it carries. Once the person is completely deflated, Soft Machine is able to drag them through any sort of hole, crevice, or anything, making it easier to hold onto their targets as hostages. Soft Machine can also stab people, but no one cares about that part. Now, if Soft Machine behaved like any other enemy Stand user like in any other part, Soft Machine would have just been another simple to defeat Stand, but how it was used is what I like about it. It never showed itself, always stayed hidden, and allowed others to come to it, letting their curiosity get the better of them, so that Soft Machine could catch them. It shows just how patient the user is. I really like how it was so secretive until the reveal of it near the end of the battle, and I think that is what made Soft Machine more interesting for me.

Rank 9: Oasis (Used by Secco)

When Vento Aureo came about, there was a new type of Stand that was introduced. The type of Stand that the user wears. There were two Stands in Vento Aureo that were worn by their users, and this would continue on in later Jojo parts, such as the Stand, 20th Century Boy in Steel Ball Run. One of these two worn Stands was Oasis, and it was a very interesting Stand. When the user is near any sort of solid surface, Oasis can be activated in order to turn the solid surface into that of mud. Once in the mud, Oasis can allow the user to swim through it easily, while making it hard for the target trapped within the mud to even escape. However, just like Notorious B.I.G., the user cannot see while in the mud, but instead of speed, it relies on hearing it’s targets to attack them. Though the surface is all mud-like, it still acts as a solid to others. Say that someone were to shoot it. Instead of the bullet going through, it would deflect the bullet because it is just rock. Another intriguing thing is that Oasis can turn the surface from mud to solid easily, allowing it to badly harm it’s targets, such as turning mud into jagged rocks to impale its enemies. Oasis was a very interesting Stand, but I think that the other worn Stand did better, which we’ll get to soon enough

Rank 8: Kraft Work (Used by Sale)

This is the other Stand that went against another members of Passione and managed to live… Some how. The user was shot in the head, so I am wondering how it survived. Anyway, Kraft Work is a pretty confusing Stand to understand, but when you do figure out what it does, it turns out to be a very threatening Stand. Kraft Work has the ability to control kinetic energy. I have no idea what any of this means since I sucked in science class, but thankfully, it’s very easy to explain. So, anyway, this means that Kraft Work can stop the movement of anything at any time and can create more movement to them at their current state with great force. For instance, in the fight with Mista, when he fired a bullet into the user’s head, Kraft Work was able to stop the bullet from going through, so that it would not kill the user. When the user had one of the bullets in his hand, he was able to simply tap the bullet, and send it at Mista with the same force as being shot out with a gun to kill the target. It really manages to be a very interesting Stand, and be a very cool one for all those who understand this science stuff that I don’t. Seriously, I just came to watch sharply dressed guys beat the crap out of each other with ghosts.

Rank 7: White Album (Used by Ghiaccio)

I said we’d get to the second worn Stand in Vento Aureo, and here he is. This one is even more so, as it really feels like the user does more than just have a Stand. It feels like the user has abilities of it’s own, which I think makes White Album all the more interesting. White Album is able to control the weather, turning the entire area that it surrounds. However, it can get even colder due to White Album’s ability, known as White Album Gently Weeps, which turns the area’s temperature to below freezing, and can create sheets of ice that are strong enough to deflect even bullets. This only adds to the armor that it has, as it is already impenetrable on it’s own, with the only way for the user inside to be harmed is by attacking through the opening on the back of White Album’s neck. However, due to it being warm inside White Album and air turning into a gas, it can easily be blocked (Sheesh, what is it with this science stuff). Also, thanks to the skates on the bottom of it’s feet, White Album can skate across the ground at a speed of 80km/h. That’s more than Highway Star, who could go at a speed of 60km/h. White Album was a Stand that was full of surprises, and they were all pretty good ones.

Rank 6: Baby Face (Used by Melone)

Okay, so most of the Stands may have had some creepy moments, but they were pretty tame for the most part. Baby Face is a Stand that changes that in seconds. Okay, so Baby Face starts out as a simple computer that can gain information on people and store them into itself. Sounds pretty tame to start with, don’t you think. Well, I agree. Then you get to the Homunculus part of Baby Face. Or rather, how the Homunculus is created. Baby Face can create a second part of the Stand, which is a small Homunculus that starts as a baby and grows with new information given to it so that it can continue it’s mission, but how it’s created is the creepy part. In order for Baby Face to be created, it has to gain the DNA of a woman and get her pregnant for the Homunculus to be born. Oh, that is just all kinds of screwed up. Anyway, after this point, Baby Face is able to use it’s Homunculus abilities to reform anything by turning them into cubes. For example, when Baby Face was tasked with kidnapping Trish, he used his abilitiy to turn her into cubes, and to hide her from the group, he turned her into a table. Baby Face can use this on himself as well, and can hide from enemies by turning himself into any inanimate object, and can even take away pieces of each person just to kill them. So, Baby Face. A very unique and interesting Stand…. But god, is creating that thing messed up.

Rank 5: Green Day (Used by Cioccolata)

Being one of the most sadistic villains in Vento Aureo, maybe in the entirety of Jojo, it only makes sense that the user would have a Stand as sadistic as Green Day. Green Day has the ability to create mold. That may not be much until you actually witness the effects of this mold. The mold is able to tear apart the bodies of people, and have them fall apart like some sort of mutation. It also doesn’t help that Green Day has a range that can cover the entire city of Rome. This is mostly affected by the altitude of a person, as the mold is at a low altitude. The lower a person is, the more effective Green Day’s mold is. If a person were to be lying on the floor, they would be infected and dead within seconds, while someone at a higher level will take longer. That is why Green Day worked alongside Oasis, as Oasis’s ability to turn solid ground into mud would allow Green Day to have a better chance at killing its targets. Green Day was a very deadly Stand given to a very sadistic user. So sadistic, he made sure to record each second people were suffering from the effects of Green Day’s ability. It’s no surprise that the user of Green Day got the longest beating in the Jojo manga to date.

Rank 4: Man in the Mirror (Used by Illuso)

Remember when Kakyoin said to Polnareff that there was no such thing as a mirror world or a world inside the mirror. Well, as it turns out, Kakyoin was full of it, because Man in the Mirror proves that there is in fact a world inside the mirror. Anyway, Man in the Mirror was a pretty cool Stand. Man in the Mirror has the ability to bring its user and anyone it wants into the mirror world, a world that is just a mirrored version of our world, completely devoid of other people. When Man in the Mirror is about to drag someone else in, only they will be able to see it, and no one else can. Breaking the mirror does not stop the target from being dragged in. In fact, it just makes things worse for them. If the target that is being dragged in by Man in the Mirror happens to be a Stand user, than the user of Man in the Mirror can choose if it wants to bring their Stand in or not (Which, honestly, why would they want to do that?). So, in other words, if a Stand user is dragged in, only they are dragged in. Not their Stand. So, they cannot defend themselves from Man in the Mirror once they are inside the mirror world. This is a good thing for Man in the Mirror, since it is rather weak, and it and it’s user can leave at any time, and leave a target trapped inside with no way of getting out. So, in other words, Man in the Mirror is a nerfed Hanged Man, to say the least. But it’s still just as good as Hanged Man.

Rank 3: Black Sabbath (Used by Polpo)

Black Sabbath was the very first enemy Stand introduced… And it was definitely a great way to introduce it. I mean, seriously, I could talk about how great it is just by Black Sabbath’s design alone. But, let’s just stick to its abilities. Black Sabbath creates something known as The Trial. Before Black Sabbath appears, one must fail The Trial. As part of initiation for Passione, the user orders a joining member to watch over a lighter for twenty four hours without letting the lighter go out. If they succeed, they get to join Passione. If they fail… Well, that’s where Black Sabbath comes in. If the fire on the lighter goes out, Black Sabbath appears before them, and drags out a person’s soul, or Stand if they are a Stand user. Once it has it in it’s hands, Black Sabbath will have one of the Arrows come from it’s mouth. These Arrows are a huge gamble. If you get pierced with them, you have a chance of getting a Stand, but you risk dying as well… So it’s kind of a big gamble. Anyway, besides that, Black Sabbath can move through shadows. When in shadows, such as a person's shadow, it will try to attack them through them, even using the shadows birds flying over them to catch them. This is also a disadvantage to Black Sabbath, as it cannot move in sunlight, as it will disappear when doing so. Black Sabbath had a lot to live up to as the first enemy Stand of Vento Aureo, and I think it managed to live up to it very well.

Rank 2: Grateful Dead (Used by Proscuitto)

Baby Face may have been the most disturbing Stand of Vento Aureo, but Grateful Dead was the first disturbing Stand of Vento Aureo. The thing about Grateful Dead is that it has no way of fighting, no way to protect itself, no sure way of where it’s going, nothing. It is just a Stand that activates its ability and let’s it happen. However, it does it so well that I just love everything about this Stand. Grateful Dead is a reverse Sethan. Instead of aging people backwards and making them younger, Grateful Dead accelerates the aging process and makes people older. Not just physically, but mentally as well, as if they don’t know what’s going on. No matter who it is, whether it’s a friend or an enemy, Grateful Dead will cause everyone except its user to age. That’s not to say that it’s user can’t age. If it wants to disguise itself, than Grateful Dead will allow them to age. Grateful Dead’s ability of aging rate depends on a person’s body temperature. The hotter it is, the quicker they age, so it is advised for a user to stay cool with something like ice to keep them from aging. Grateful Dead had a very unique way of aging it’s targets, instead of what Sethan did, Grateful Dead affected anyone and everyone, and managed to be one of the most overpowered and most disturbing Stands of Vento Aureo, and that is what makes it so great.

Rank 1: Metallica (Used by Risotto Nero)

Metallic ais a Stand that is bizarre, crazy, reading of it makes my skin crawl, and, of course, is one of the best Stands of Vento Aureo. Metallica doesn’t really have a great appearance. It’s just a bunch of little metallic creatures that swarm around in some iron. Nothing much. But I assure you, that’s just the beginning of how creepy these little guys are. Thanks to the ability to manipulate any sort of iron, they are able to blend their user into any environment, so he can remain hidden from his enemy. But, that isn’t what makes Metallica a threatening Stand. Being a very lethal Stand, it is capable for Risotto to never even come face to face with his target before he violently kills them, and Metallica is a Stand that is probably one of the most violent in Jojo. As I said before, Metallica can manipulate iron of any kind of iron, weather it be in items, in the ground… or in human blood. That’s right, Metallica can manipulate the iron inside of a person’s blood. This created probably the bloodiest fight in Jojo, with the fight between Nero and Doppio. Metallica proved itself as a dangerous Stand by filling Doppio’s face with nails, creating a pair of scissors in his throat, and losing so much iron in his body, that Doppio was close to death, as he had lost far too much iron and was suffering from anemia. But Metallica isn’t all destructive. It can use it’s ability to help its user, as when Nero had his entire foot cut off, instead of just leaving it there, he had Metallica turn his blood into staples and had his foot put back in place for it to heal. Metallica is just full of surprises, huh. Metallica may not have been around for long, but it’s multitude of abilities and its violent nature proves itself as the Stand of the leader of the assassin group and my favorite enemy Stand of Vento Aureo. I hope you enjoyed this list, and don’t worry, Jojo-nuary is just getting started