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Writing Question

I wrote this in fiev minutes, is it good?

We were asked t email our teacher and best few get snickers, so I sent this, it had the actual names but I changed them fr privacy reasons:
Mrs Hoffer and Jacob Black
One boring afternoon, Mrs Hoffer was marking some assessments handed in by those rebels of a class, 10H. She was getting fairly tired, grumpy and just wanted more coffee, she was just wondering if the only other teacher in this block (Mr Smith) would get her some more when the smell of it drifted in. Looking up at the door, she had to hide a squeal of excitement, for standing in the doorway was Jacob Black, and even better, he was topless. He walked over to her desk and placed on it, the coffee; she stopped marking the assessments, and just chatted with Jacob. She was having some fun when the assessments glared up at her; she started multi-tasking talking and working. When they were marked she yawned, Jacob told her to rest her head and kissed her on the forehead.
She woke with a start to the sound of knocking. It was Mr Smith bringing her a coffee, when he placed it on her desk he asked, “Are you alright?” Mrs Hoffer replied saying she was just talking to Jacob Black. He raised an eyebrow, confused she looked around; disappointed she sighed it was just a dream. Leaving he gave her a look that clearly said he thought she was cra-zay; sighing again she took a sip of the coffee and marked the assessments.
The next day before she handed out the assessments she told about what had happened the previous night. Quinn piped up at the end and said, “That look Mr Smith gave you, he gives me that all the time.”

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I would edit the mistakes if I could.
Potter-rulez posted over a year ago
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*five
sideshowbobbart posted over a year ago
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I did say i would if i would COULD but i can't
Potter-rulez posted over a year ago
 Potter-rulez posted over a year ago
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Writing Answers

hgfan5602 said:
A couple of punctuation errors, but that is not a big deal. You should go more in depth and description with your writing, otherwise, this is very nice!!!
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posted over a year ago 
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Thanks my teacher thought so too
Potter-rulez posted over a year ago
sideshowbobbart said:
For a five minute text, yes I would say it is very good. I would like to see some you took more time to do though.
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posted over a year ago 
Sutelc22 said:
i like your story.
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posted over a year ago 
Alexa11789 said:
It's alright...
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posted over a year ago 
ZekiYuro said:
Actually this writing has nothing special,but because you wrote it just for 5 minutes,so I can say 1 word about this:Fantastic!!!!!!!!!!!Keep on writing!!!!!!!!:))
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posted over a year ago 
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