{Tara pov on this one. The last I posted was about Devin. IF you remember}



I wasn't always this way. I didn't always think about killing myself when things went wrong. Not until I got the worst shock of my life. The image is so clear in my mind after all these years that I can still taste the smoke in my nostrils and see the fire behind my eyes. I've lied about my past, about who my family was. But if things got out, I was scared to loose more than I had. But now I have nothing else to loose.
So let me take you to the night my life became expendable and the minute I realized how utterly lost I have always been. This is not a pity story. This isn't a desperate attempt to be heard. This is my story and I can only say that I wish it weren't true.

The moon was full, just like in those stories. It was an amber moon, the kind you see in summer. It was darker inside than out. But back then I wasn't scared of the dark. There was a strange instrument playing. I took little notice considering where I lived. But the music was something special. It gave me the strange feeling of dreaming. And in a way, I guess I was. I could see things but it was all blurred as if I were moving to fast for the world. Pictures lured into my head crossed my vision. And then I was watching as the most gorgeous looking guy I ever saw came towards me. I should have been scared witless. I didn't know him and he looked...otherworldly. Then he spoke to me softly, saying something about how his “princess returned to him at last”. If I was in my right mind I would have argued. But I couldn't. I was too hypnotized by the sound of the music and the look in his eyes. Then, strange as it sounds, I fell asleep. At least I thought I was asleep.
I awoke to the sound of panic and chaos. Smoke assailed my senses and then I could see again. What was around me made my heart stop beating. Fire was everywhere. Bodies lay at my feet and blood dripped from my hands. I heard sirens outside as well as screams and shouts. Someone was walking around and I dropped to the floor. I didn't care about the fire blazing around me or the house falling down even as people looked for survivors. I stayed on the ground next to my family and wished I could join them in eternal peace.
My instinct must have placed a shield around me for next I knew, I was alone in the night as the freezing cold became a sheer contrast to the blazing heat of hours before. The moon was still alive but just barely. I was satisfied to lay where I was. But someone pulled me to my feet. I stared into his face as the memory of the night overwhelmed me. I didn't even know I was being held till I looked down. His touch burned me and yet I couldn't move myself away. His words were meant to soothe and soothe they did. It didn't matter that I was the cause of my family's destruction. Someone stirred a feeling deep within me. It would be sometime before I knew the reason behind Kuran's sweet words and his gentle touches. And it would be my own destruction.