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He had just snorted a line of Horlicks, (he was an idiot)
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On the 21st of June 2007, my best friend killed himself. He shot himself in the head after suffering from depression for what he said was 'as long as i can remember'. I'd known the guy from when i was three and i miss him like the devil. He was called Joe Spencer Garrard. But for the last few years he dropped the spencer bit, (his bastard dads name). I grew up with the guy and was with him on the last day. Hence i feel almightly responcible, and i know people have told me there is nothing i could have done but i do. As we grew up together we used to play out in the woods alot, Joe was an out door person, he liked to mess around, we both did. But since he died i feel like my childhood is over and i must grow up. =[ So faithful fanpop friends, my guts are on display to you lovely lot.
i am lost and every day a part of me wants to not be alive anymore, I have tryed talking to people on Suicide fourums, people who have all expirienced things like this but it just feels like they are regurgitating the same stuff from person to person, im seeing a shrink (docter) about my depression but i wont go on Meds.
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