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Greetings, new follower:
If you are reading this letter then you have doubtless been accepted into the select band of professional wizards known as the Death Eaters. If by some unprecedented chance you are reading this and you have not been accepted into the Death Eaters then I suggest you put down this letter and leave now, or the consequences for you will be as terrible as my lifelong study into the Dark Arts can make them.
Please find enclosed a short introductory guide to Death Eating, which you must memorize and then eat, to prevent security leaks. (Due to an unfortunate fatality last week, it is now permitted to cut the guide into small pieces before swallowing).
The next meeting is scheduled for midnight, 11th June, when I trust we will have the pleasure of watching your initiation ceremony. Please remember to bring a clean handsaw and enough twine. It's so distressing when people don't prepare for these events properly.
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I mean I understand if someone hates a crazy,neurotic Twilight fan,but to think about Christmas as something as a good chance to insult and quote "piss off" Twi fan,I find it nothing but ridiculous.
Look at this:
"Hate Twilight? Want to piss off a Twilight fan this xmas? Stop by
www.planetneonbunny.com and buy one (or more) of our Twilight mocking
t-shirts, £10 each plus reasonable worldwide shipping.Make their xmas lousy!"
Seriously,isn't Xmas suppose to be about love and sharing with your loved ones?Well obviously not anymore.This is what I see as obsessed Twilight hater,if you hate something and you're so devoted just to make someone else miserable at this loving part of the year,you should seriously ask yourself about your own sanity.As I pointed out so freaking many times,I love normal Twi haters,I have great respect for them,'cause I find them more like just people who don't like/hate something,but they will say it in normal manners,rather than hurt someone who loves that same thing.I know this kinda goes even beyond Twilight fans/haters,but it's true.
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