"Hi I'm Johnny Knoxville and welcome to my spot!"
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You are a wise man, Mr Knoxville.

Opinion by misanthrope86 posted 1 year ago
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 by 6 fans
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Over the years, Johnny Knoxville has uttered some weird and wonderful things. Here is a collection of bizarre quotes from the hilariously wise man.


"I never puke ever, and I really almost puked then."


Scott Potasnik: "You guys are gonna hate me an hour from now."
Johnny Knoxville: "We hate you already."


[after taking a fall] "My head stopped my body from getting really hurt on that."


"If your asshole can't see the camera, the camera can't see your asshole."


"I have a full grown, semi-nude man bound with duct tape in my truck and I was trying to get out to the desert to bury him. How do I get to 5 South?"


"Rectal bleeding... another first for Jackass."


"I don't want to die, but I don't mind taking a few slams for the kids."


[arguing with a parrot] "Don't tell me to fuck off, say "Jackass"."


"I feel like my eyes have gonorrhea."


"Hi, I'm Johnny Knoxville and I'm about to get hit by a car real soon!"


"You're the crappiest human bowling ball I ever saw in my whole life!"


"Being a complete juvenile delinquent helped me grow up a little."


"So, we've driven an hour north from Miami to Boca Raton, believe it or not, to film Steve-O jump into nine days worth of elephant poo."


"I just love that spirit that makes people do things that they probably shouldn't."


[to a cow] "Hi sweetie, I'm gonna inseminate you artificially... maybe for real if you play your cards right."


"There's no such thing as a pretty good gator wrestler."


"It's a real primal thing, watching someone get hurt. It's funny and accessible."


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LOL, now I'm gonna have to go watch Jackass. See what you've done?!? =P
posted 1 year ago.
 
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