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Why did the chicken cross the road?

Opinion by i_luv_angst posted 1 year ago
4.7
 by 57 fans
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I found this one on the internet:

Why did the chicken cross the road?

BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for change! The chicken wanted change!

JOHN MCCAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he was a maverick chicken, and he wanted to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

SARAH PALIN: The chicken had to cross the road because he was not able to find a bridge. Alaskans do not build bridges to nowhere. If he wanted a bridge, he'd have to build it himself.

JOE BIDEN: The chicken crossed the road because he was heading back to Scranton .

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either for us or against us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

COLIN POWELL: Now, to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad.So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a cert ain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2008. This new platform is much more stable and will never reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?


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26 comments
user photo
LOL! Great! They should have added Ellen DeGeneriss, or Brittany Spears in there...
posted 1 year ago.
 
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lol, very funny! :D They had something very similar to that in MAD Magazine, and they added Ellen DeGeneres there, ShadowFlame.
posted 1 year ago.
last edited 1 year ago
 
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lmao! thats hilarious!!!
posted 1 year ago.
 
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Hahaha!
posted 1 year ago.
 
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There also Martin Luther King Jr. : "I have a dream of a world where chickens can cross the road without a need to justify their actions."
posted 1 year ago.
 
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SG1-090 said:
LOL =] i love it! This is well getting saved!
posted 1 year ago.
 
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_lina_ said:
The Ernest Hemmingway one made me laugh out loud :)
posted 1 year ago.
 
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LOL Le-Magnifique that is exactly like my motto. "I have a dream that one day chickens will be able to cross the road without their motives being questioned"

They were all absolutely hilarious!! Loved Dr Phil and Oprah!!
posted 1 year ago.
 
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JulieL44 said:
Haha! Really funny. I love it
posted 1 year ago.
 
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jthomps said:
Thats brilliant. An Irish comedian, Mario Rosenstock, who does impressions of famous people on the radio, did a sketch like this with Irish people discussing Why the chicken crossed the road. I have put it on YouTube and can be found at this address:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h06HfLHooyR­s

I know its all Irish people but let me know what you think by commenting on YouTube.
posted 1 year ago.
 
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haha. LOL at Sharpton!
posted 1 year ago.
 
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whooshaa said:
*lol* brilliant
posted 1 year ago.
 
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hilarious!!!
posted 1 year ago.
 
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meeee said:
C on a b! jthomps this made me think of Gift and the you post a link....
posted 1 year ago.
 
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HepKat10 said:
That was Awesome!!! Very Funny!! hahaha
posted 1 year ago.
 
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That's just too good!
posted 1 year ago.
 
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lol that's hilarious!
posted 1 year ago.
 
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YEAH DICK CHENEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
posted 1 year ago.
 
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emisa123 said:
Me: What chicken?
Gage: The little chicken crossed the road and then got hit by a car, and guess who was in the car? Mrs. Chicken!
My 3 year old sister: The chicken crossed the road so it wouldn't get eaten a kiiiled.

*theese are actual answers from actual people
posted 1 year ago.
 
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omg cool i LOVE this
posted 1 year ago.
 
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adavila said:
chuck norris is the real reason why the chicken cross the road
posted 1 year ago.
last edited 1 year ago
 
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laugh
awesome!!!!
posted 11 months ago.
 
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laugh
ha ha veay funny
posted 10 months ago.
 
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laugh
well may she wanted to get to the other side. has anyone thout of that or are they all stupid????
posted 7 months ago.
 
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laugh
omfg LUV IT!!!!
posted 6 months ago.
 
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heart
HAHA!!! i love this!!
posted 4 months ago.
 
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