NAME: Aloysius Creevey

ABOUT ME: I can guess the nationality of any homemade porn without turning the sound up. Seriously. It's a pretty simple formula.

England: Bad teeth. Usually a little grotty.
America: A bit angry. Always follows the basic porn checklist.
French: The women all look amazing and the men all look like dicks.
Germany: Lots of ass stuff.

The best home made I have ever seen are some Victorian photos of naked ladies. It cost me my entire back catalogue of Asian Fanny Fun in a trade but it was worth it.

The wicked thing about the photos is that they're of ladies. Not like any old ladies...