Bellatrix Lestrange Article: 24 Ways to Piss Off Bellatrix Lestrange (Guaranteed to get you a Crucio!)

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24 Ways to Piss Off Bellatrix Lestrange (Guaranteed to get you a Crucio!)

posted by PaulInDaHood

Hey Guys. Here is A list I came up with (Luna--Lovegood helped) of fun ways to annoy Bellatrix. Guaranteed to get you crucio-ed! Please comment and let me know what you think. Thank you to Luna--Lovegood for helping me write this, you are quite creative for a non-deatheater, Luna!

1. Impersonate the dark Lord and convince her that he’s really into peace with Muggles.

2. Whenever she cackles evilly, roll your eyes in an obvious way and grumble, “That’s getting sooooo old, Bella”

3. Next time she uses the Cruciatus Curse on someone, groan and say she has no imagination when it comes to torturing people

4. Suggest that the Dark Lord thinks that Snape is a more loyal Death Eater than she is

5. Offer to take her shopping so that she doesn’t have to wear her old Halloween costume anymore

6. Tell her how loudly and in great detail how much she reminds you of Tonks

7. Surreptitiously tell her that the Dark Lord has been “Seeing Someone”, than add in a whisper, “He’s got good taste!”

8. Impersonate Voldemort and tell her that she’s being kicked out of the Death Eaters because she’s not evil enough.

9. Imperius Wormtail to constantly follow her around, declaring undying love for her

10. Tell her that you think she’d look good in pastels, particularly pink.

11. Ask her just WHAT use was she to the Dark Lord when she was stuck in Azkaban?

12. Anonymously send her a Barbie Doll as a Christmas gift

13. Tell her that whoever sold her the wig she’s wearing definitely pulled a fast one on her

14. Write “I Wish Voldy Loved Me” on the back of her dress.

15. Lock her up in a Sephora store

16. Ask her just what did ripping up her dresses achieve?

17. Ask her why Voldemort doesn’t love her back

18. Constantly criticize Voldemort in front of her

19. Impersonate Voldemort and tell her she’s not allowed to use crucio anymore

20.Frame her Azkaban Mug Shot and put copies of it up everywhere.

21. Put up posters that say stuff like “I love Muggles”, and “My best friend is a Mudblood” in her bedroom.

22. Make her listen to Justin Bieber (Actually that’d piss anyone off)

23. Anonymously send her self-help books, with titles like, "Crucio for Dummies", and "How to control your Insanity"

24. Tell her that she looks EXACTLY like a very well-known Muggle named Helena Bonham Carter

To the Bellatrixes: Maybe you could help rate this, and tell me exactly what you'd do to anyone who did any of these things to you? Strictly for research purposes? Thank you!!

Mothergothel90, fishypup and 12 others like this

deppsgurl OMG THATS AWSOME LOVETT!!!!LOL

harrypotterbest LOVE number 24!

PotterForever haha WIN!

harrypotterbest Ohhh, and you can pretend to think she's Andromeda, so you run up to here and say, 'Hi Andromeda!'

zanhar1 2, 3, 5, 8, 91 11, 13, 16, 20, 23, and mostly 24 are the best. another good one... break her wand and send her to the world of muggles :)

BellaLovett hahahahahaha...*laughs&laughs* GREAT JOB.. No.24 IS AMAZING

BellaLovett @harrypotterbest & zanhar1 i like urs too

zanhar1 thanks

BellatrixCissy 24 would piss her off lol calling her a muggle if iwere whoever said that would be DEAD in seconds

emilyroxx 22 and 24, roflmao! xDD 25. Say: "Voldemort never loved you anyway."

SnapesGirl HAHAHA! No9 and No 14(write 'i wish Voldy loved me' on the back of her dress) is so funny!! XD

HouseofNightRox 9,10 and 12 are the best

willandemma4eva HAHAH that is great!!

Perfidia wonderful! I really like it!

cedonia6 lol at 24!

LittleLestrange Omg funny

Tsuneyoki There's this one too: 25 - Write "Mudbloods are good kissers!" on the back of her dress 26 - Tell her that she secretly loves Harry 27 - Put boards on her bedroom like "Bellatrix and Harry: Love Forever"

GaiaBVGSR Haha If anyone does one of that things to her, I would Crucio that person

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My Lord & The Nonsense of Love

posted by NelenaBlack666

(Here's the first one.
I know. She's supposed to die before him, but let pretend she comes back to life or something and finds out that he is dead (and after a long time to admit it to herself...))

(1)
My Lord...
Come home again.
You have not battled in vain.
Don't leave me alone.
Without you, I cannot hold on,
My Lord...

But if it is the way you want it to be,
If there is nothing to make you stay,
Then, it seems that I have nothing more to say.
Though, I'd want you to come back to me.
Too much, I miss you already,
My Lord...

I knew not you could be even colder than you were.
Without you, I have no will......

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Rita Skeeter Interviews Bellatrix Lestrange

posted by KateKicksAss

Me, Myself, and I

By Rita Skeeter

Exclusive interview with notorious Death Eater Bellatrix Lestrange

Here I am, sitting in the private dungeon of the notorious Bellatrix Lestrange, most feared follower of the Dark Lord, and having a completely normal interview. Read on to see if there’s more to Bellatrix than just madness and a nasty reputation!

RS: Hello!

BL: *growls*

RS: Do you mind if I use a quick-quotes quill?

BL: What’s that?

*fingers wand handle threateningly*

RS: Oh, nothing, erm, moving on…Can I call you Bella?

BL: No.

RS: How would you describe your relationship with the man known as...

1

Death Eaters!

posted by Lord-Voldemort

As you well know, our goal was to murder Harry Potter and dispose of the Order of the Pheonix. With the approach of the final 2 movies, I fear that the majority of HP fans will believe us defeated and vanquished, HOWEVER, this movie is a fake. Rowling did not write a story, she wrote a history of Wizarding War and marketed it as a work of fiction. Rowling is a very clever woman and therefore she altered the end so that the "good guys" won the war, when in reality, I won the war. Harry Potter is dead. Please read the Alternate Ending posted by Dawnstalker to find out the truth about the end...