Clay: Johnny ain't gonna be cool if your messing with her again.
Trevor: Oh really, let's ask him. (lifts foot) Hey cowboy? You mind that I fucked your old lady? Oh, what's that, you DON'T mind.. Wha- because your a dead man!? And the only scented part of you left is this little piece of brain! And the grizzle on the end of my boot! WELL THANK YOU VERY MUCH COWBOYYY!
Trevor: Oh I LIKE IT, denial! That's the first part of the grieving process brothers. Now let's all hold hands.
Clay: THIS BETTER BE BULLSHIT! (they all ride off)
Trevor: Oh, where you guys going!? LET'S GO LADIES!
Trevor Philips: [intentionally running into somebody] Oh, by the way, that's entirely your fault.
Wade Herbert: There's two Michael Townleys living in LS. One is 83 and the other is in kindergarten. I asked the teacher to put him on the phone just to be safe. She threatened to call the cops. I ain't no molester, Trevor.
Trevor Philips: Shut up before 'I' molest you, alright.
Wade: Wow, that's a real mind fuck.
Trevor: Grr... I'll show you a fuckin mind fuck!
Michael De Santa: I know. I still hate myself. But at least I know the words for it now.
Trevor Philips: Yeah, but I hate you and I know the words for it. Does that mean I don't have to go to therapy?
"[stomping Johnny Klebitz to death] Fucking shit, cunt, cunt, cunt, cunt! Who the fuck are you speaking to? Who? Who? I'm talking to you huh? You fuck! Next time don't get in my fucking face! I just saw a fucking ghost and I gotta hear your crap? Get up! GET UP! Fuck you then".
"Now go. I need to meditate. Orr, masterbate.. Or both"
"Nothing.. Well, It didn't sound like nothing. Didn't look like nothing. I don't THINK that it was nothing!"
"Why, oh why, do you exist?"
"When ever you get a doubt in your mind. I want you to remember I'm watching though the scoop of a high powered rifle"
"I don't even SOUND that Canadian!"
Trevor Philips: I asked for a fair day's pay for a fair day's work. Well, he kinda got a little angry. So, I admit, I kinda got a little angry too.
Michael De Santa: Did you kill him?
Trevor Philips: What kinda fucking animal do you take me for? No, I didn't kill him!
[Michael sighs with relief]
Trevor Philips: But I DID kidnap his wife.
"They damaged my stuff. They smash up my home. Damage my soul. Look at this... This, this, this, this statue here of Impotent Rage. This fucking meant more to me than Johnny K meant to anyone! And they smashed it! Those pathetic, midlife crisis, hog-riding, shaven-headed, fruity leather-chap-wearing fucking assholes!"
"You called her a bitch!.. Don't you got a mother!?"
"RONN!!... Give my coffee or I'll cut your arm off!"
Janet: Hey, you're banned!
Trevor Philips: Is anyone NOT banned?
"(steals dogs collar)I know, this is weird for all of us... Now get back to your owner before she uses this as an excuse to go back to rehab!"
"I spend a LOT of time with fuckin people I don't like! It's one of my fuckin hobbies!"
"RUN YOU LITTLE FUCK!!"