WE WERE WARNED. For months Rob told us there was a spirit-shattering tale of Pokemon-y wrongness out there, and we laughed at him. He said it was the worst fan fiction he’d seen, and we waved him off. We taunted him, begged him to fucking show it. We were so innocent then. How could we know? How could we possibly prepare ourselves for the depths this story would go to?
The Pokemon story went to lengths as bad as Lara Croft and Squick, but it did it in the lovingly cutesy world of Pokemon. This, frankly, was bad enough to put it at the top of the list. The things that happened… Christ, I shudder to think about it. But would you like to know what we feel makes this story the undisputed champion of the FFF lot? Why we believe that even if we went back to every Fan Fiction Friday that has ever appeared on this site that it would still top the list? It’s simple, really. You might even have overlooked it if you read the damn thing. Here it is:
The main character’s name is David.
The author’s name is David.
So that ALSO tells us something.
Than again, I do the same with a lot of my own stories..
#2: LILLY'S OPPOSITE SIDE:
Lilly, sweet, innocent Lilly becomes a steriotypical slut, and deranged killer.
Kate becomes a slut as well, but betrays everyone she's ever known witch is even "better".
Garth is a steriotypical gang leader, who kidnaps/rapes Lilly just cause he COULD.
And... Well. you get the idea..
#3: (I don't know the title)
Taemin and Jonghyun rape a prostitute, kill her and then carry her heart in a jar and have sex while eating the heart.
#4: CUPCAKES:
Obviously I am actually a fan of this story.
But it's still creepy as FUCK!
Dashie is given a drugged cupcake and brought into a creepy basement.
Where Pinkie slowly rips her open, all while readers feel Dash's "can't move" feelings, and too me, it's the REAL fear.
Not Pinkie herself.
All she's doing is naming lame puns and smiling WAY to much..
#5: HUMPHREY LOSES IT:
Okay.
So I don't know why I would read something created by the same person who wrote stuff like Lilly's Opposite Side and Tattered and Torn.
But, I guess, it's good having me tell people about it, so others don't read it (though you probably will anyway).
But anyway.
There are three parts to this story.
And it's something I can't stand.
"lost episodes".
What the fuck is up, with "lost episodes".
I mean. Take Discords Lost episode and Flim and Flam lost episode.
What are they trying to do.
Make us believe it really happened.
Sure.
I'll believe lost episodes after believing "Slenderman".
I mean, if nobody saw him. Why is there a picture of him?
He's like The Ring. See it, you die.
Only slenderman is stupider.
Anyway.
Nothing about Humphrey Loses It makes any sense whatsoever.
I mean. I'd believe him killing Lilly and her turtle, but setting her corpse on fire?
What. Are wolfs magicians now.
Are they gonna pull a rabbit out of their fuckin tail!?
It's stupid.
And what he dose to Kate is neither 'clean', or nesseary.
Death by sex.
How is that even possible?
Well. Probably lots of ways.
But whatever. Not here to fight about stuff like that..
#6: JUST A JOKE:
Want smosh to be ruined.
Read an erotic fanfic between Ian and Anthnoy.
#7: A DELETED SPONGEBOB STORY:
Spongebob and Patrick have graphic sex with Sandy.
And half way though, Patrick randomly decides to take off his helmet and die for for literary NO reason at all..
#8: EXPERIMENTS OF TWILIGHT SPARKLE:
Well, this story isn't so much scary, as it is, WEIRD.
Our friend Twilight decides to preform horrible experiments on her friends...for reason that aren't quite clear. she ties them down In her basement were she indulges them in physical and physiological tortures..I don't mind them until she starts..sexually abusing them...why must writers put this in the stories..would the gore be scary enough. well I can't say much its just each of there tortures are described in detail..really its all over the place it lacks motive and understanding.. but really its on level with cupcakes ( another fic for another time) because twilight does show that she snapped and is going crazy. but really that's all..
#9: SWEET APPLE MASSACRE:
Again, it's not so much scary, as it is WEIRD.
Big Mac has snapped unknown reasons and kidnaps the Crusaders for being too "loud".
He is the big brother of one of the filly's. he says that they annoy him and that he wants to end it...so he proceeds to torture and rape them..he makes them do gross and freaky things...it was really all messed...I mean hes the big brother of one of them..and hes a quiet character on the show. and the story is nothing but this out of character torture from him...it really make no sense..now I don't mind torture being done...but it should have some reason for it..or one you can acknowledge but this has none of that.....really I can't say much about it but don't look it up..don't look it up!!!
#10: GOTTA LOVE BERRIES:
The story starts off innocent enough.
It's about those lovely veggie wolves, starting at the scene where Shaky recommended them in order to get Humphrey to forget about Kate, but Humphrey showed zero interest in the two girls.,
Anyway..
Appearently after their non speaking, tiny role, they go into the forest to get more Barries, and I think berrie juice sprays on Janice.,
And of coarse.
Sense this is the bizarre world of fanfiction, this soon leads to two STRAIGHT girls having sex with each other (girls are so fuckin lucky,. The only way guys can make 'expirements' hot, is in hell bellow).
Anyway.
Obviously I wouldn't exactly recommend this story to most people.,
I mean.
If I wanted to see girl on girl porn, I would go to a porn site (not that I do).
