Nate: Aren't you curious what it says?
Chuck: I think I can guess. You're a disappointment of a son; I'd die of embarrassment if I hadn't already; why do you wear so much purple?
Blair: Dear Son, I know I've always been hard on you—
Blair: —but my goal was always to prepare you for this day. To help you go from being a boy to a man.
Chuck: An Italian au pere took care of that.
Blair: Chuck, please. Sadly, there is nothing like the passing of a father to aid in this rite of passage for his son. Ultimately I do feel that I did my job and you are prepared for this next chapter of your life. Therefore I am bequeathing to you the majority share of Bass Industries.
Chuck: Surely that's a mistake.
Jack: Chuck, your father wouldn't have wanted this.
Chuck: Dear old Dad? Unfortunately all I know is what he didn't want. Which is me.
Bart: ... A weekend curfew of 1 am.
Chuck: Is that Eastern or Pacific?
Chuck: My father is someone who goes after what he wants, and Lily van der Woodsen was no exception. In typical Bass man fashion his pursuit was direct, and at times not exactly subtle. One thing I learned about my father?s courtship of Lily is the importance of perseverance. That in the face of true love you don?t just give up, even if the object of your affection is begging you too. And one thing I learned from Lily is the importance of forgiveness. She gave my father the gift of a second chance and in kind I watched him become someone actually worthy of that gift. And one day I hope I?ll be lucky enough to find someone who will do the same for me. To the happy couple
Chuck: If I had a nickel for every time I heard that.
Bart: That's enough Chuck.
Gossip Girl: Looks like the pot calling the kettle black has young Bass boiling over. And if we know Chuck, he's not one to let things lie. Someone pour that man a drink.