My farewell to Conan (a la 1948 stage drama):
[Curtain opens. Squeaky, front door of ranch house opens]
Me [in kitchen, preparing sophisticated drinks]:
Conan? Is that you? Conan? Come on in, old pal! I've been waitin' for ya'! I made us pork chop and beans, ya' son of a gun. Come here.
[quiet *thump* sound on the ground near the front door]
Annie's been waitin' 17 years for you to come into our home, and here you are! Put down your coat n' hat, ya' hootin' tomcat; kick off your shoes and settle in. Annie got the guest room ready; you can stay there as long as you need to get on your feet....
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