Critical Analysis of Twilight Club
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Credit to _lina_ and cinders, because they did it first. More credit to link because that's where this is from. _lina_ used the same one.

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Number 1: Someone tells you or he admits that he has hit women in the past. He has talked about his killing sprees, he has killed another woman (Yes, she is a vampire. Who cares?) in front of her. Check!

Number 2: He refers to all women he has dated in the past with derogatory terms. He may also refer to his mother using such terms as well. Not sure about checking this one or not. He says she is the first one he dated, but then he talks of Tanya, the denali vampire, in a way that implies he doesn't like her at all. Half check.


Number 3: He tells you of abuse he has witnessed or has been a part of toward women. When asked if he has ever sought counseling, he says, "No, I never felt I needed it." He may feel guilty about it and promise that he won't do it to you. He constantly talks about killing her, but later on he starts saying he could never do it to her. This is something he also does in the opposite way, saying he knows he could kill her. Eh, check!

Finds fault with all your family and friends once you have confided in him about them or he has met them. Later, he will use what he knows against you in an argument. There is a part in the Twilight series, I'm pretty sure it was Eclipse, that Bella talks to edward about not wanting to talk to charlie about going to Florida. Edward then goes ahead and tells charlie about it. Half check. if you want to comment and tell me why it shouldn't be here, or should be a full check, please do.

Number 4:Shows up unannounced at your job, home, or places you visit (may lead to stalking). May offer to take you to any of these places on a daily basis so that you may grow dependent on him. Hmmmmm.... Seriously. He breaks into her room at night and watches her sleep. He also drives her everywhere, even when she blatantly refuses. Major check!

Number 5: Calls you often wanting to know your plans and in some cases you may have already told him, but he may be checking to see if your story has changed. He expects you to call him wherever you go and will become angry if you don't. Moments in breaking Dawn come to mind. Ditto with Eclipse. The second part (He expects you to...) is probably more fitting then the first, but it still works. Check!

Number 6: He doesn't like who he is and makes regular references about himself as being "stupid," "ugly," "dumb," and asks you, "Why do you want to be with me?" He will also resort to name calling whether he is arguing with you or "just being funny." _lina_ nailed this on the head. If you exchange "stupid", "ugly", and "dumb" for "murderer", "monster," and "killer", it works perfectly. The "Why do you want to be with me?" explains itself.

Number 7: He attempts to control money you have earned and abuses possessions that you have acquired. He often asks for financial assistance, takes over your car and tells you how you should conduct your household. He may encourage you to live with him so that he can further control you. A bit skeptical about this one. He doesn't ask for financial assistance or how to conduct her householf. However, he does buy her a new car and expects her to use it. Plus: the new car is missile proof. MISSILES. Also, Edward sets up Bella and Alice for sleepovers many times for when he leaves to go eat a mountain lion. Half check.

Number 8: He threatens to commit suicide when you try to break up with him. Self explanatory. He literally attempted suicide. Check!

Number 9: He threatens to kill you over anything from wanting to end the relationship to talking to other men. Well, he does get very, very mad at her when she talks to other guys, in particular, Jacob. Another half check.

Number 10: When he is angry with you he keeps you in a room with no access to a phone. He may lock you in the room. Pretty much, he makes Alice kidnap her. He also took the engine out of her car once. check.

Number 11: When you want to visit with a friend, go out to the movies or some other past time, he oftentimes vehemently objects or he uses tactics to make you feel guilty so that you will stay home. I already mentioned that he took part of the engine out of her car. This was to keep her from seeing Jacob, he best friend. Check.

Number 12: He will try to convince you that he is sorry for what he has done and will never do it again, only to do it again, and again. Pretty darn much. Check.



I hope now you see the light and that, yes, Edward is abusive. If you want to say why one of these should have been a Check!, a half-check, or nothing at all please say why in the comments. If you have more reasons Edward is abusive, that is also a good place to put it.
posted by Aquilia
O Tempora o Mores
Oh the times, oh the customs


This article is an appeal to all Twilight fans out there, I invite you all to think over your good and bad actions here on fanpop and contemplate them.

I have seen and compared examples of the appearances of the fandoms Harry Potter and respectively Twilight when criticism appear in each other’s sites on fanpop and I am astounded by the comparatively aggressive tone the Twilight fans carried when they respond to the said criticism.

Compare the responses of: link

And: link ;

Notes are to be made that both internet addresses were found by searching...
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Jacob: Let me call Bella.*dials Bella's number*
Operator: I am sorry. This person is talking to (Bella's voice)Edward Cullen. Please leave a message after the tone.
*tone never comes up*
Jacob: OH C'MON!

The next day.

Jacob: I want Bella NAO!*calls Bella*
(Answering machine): The Swans are out right now, please leave a message after the beep.
[beep never stops]
Jacob: OH C'MON!

The day after that:

Bella: *makes a new answering machine*
Jacob: *calls*
[Machine]: Hi, its Bella. If its Jacob, stop leaving messages saying "OH C'MON!" and if your not a Cullen or my dad, don't call me. At ALL!
*beep*
Jacob: NOOOOOO!
*beep*
Jacob: ?
*beep beep beep beep*
{This phone will self destruct in 3, 2, 1}
Jacob: OH C'MON!

[Check the TS spot to see who made it, its me. So don't kill me about 'You stole this!'].
posted by RobynPotter
{i did not write this myself, but i found it ridiculously funny and thought it needed to be posted here}

Book 1. Twilight:
Edward: Hey.
Bella: OMG, I'm so silly. And horny.
Edward: Yes. I'm dangerous. I sparkle.
Bella: OMG you're a vampire!
Edward: Yes. Let's go play baseball.
James: I like your girl, Edward. Gotta eat her.
Edward: Roar.
James: Omnomnom Bella.
Bella: OMG I'm screaming in agony! Yes, I will be a vampire!
Edward: I'm gonna kill you, James! I'm gonna suck Bella as well.
Jacob: Oh, hi there!
Book 2. New Moon:
Edward: Oops, gotta go.
Bella: OMG don't leave me! OMG I'm so depressed and dying in...
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There are 5 things you need to know-

This article is basically:
1. My story on how I got sucked into the Twilight Universe.
2. My life story on how Twilight has changed me. A lot.
3. A rant on why I like and hate about the series.
4. A confession on why I can't seem to get over with hating and loving it.
5. An opinion about how my life could have been without Twilight.

WARNING: Overall, this article is about... why I think Twilight isn't that 'bad' after all. It's going to be lengthy. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This had me wondering for a while and to...
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I dislike the books, but after seeing image after image labeled "Twilight sucks", as well as comment after comment with the words, I'm beginning to see why we can be accused of being "haters."

"Sucks" is not a swear word. To say something sucks is not going to send you to hell. But it is derogatory, and immature, and does not lead to any real discussion. Well, unless some mature Twilighter comes along and say, "I see that you think Twlight sucks. Why?" That might spark discussion. But the twilighter has the upperground in that debate, considering the anti has already shown her immaturity by...
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posted by nessienjake
Created:~Alice~


Q: What to Edward and a Christmas tree have in common?
A: Their balls are for decoration.



Bella: You're pale white and ice cold...I know what you are.
Edward: Say it. Say it!
Bella: Vanilla Ice Cream!



Edward: Bella...
Bella: Yes?
Edward: I just want to know how much you mean to me.
Bella: Aaw...
Edward: You know, what with me being an ancient VIRGIN vampire and everything...
Bella: Yeah?
Edward: Well, people were starting to think I was, y'know-
Bella: Gay?
Edward: ...
Edward: Old fashioned.
Bella: ...
Bella: Oh.



Q: How do you kill a brain?
A: Put it in the same room with Ms Meyer and her books and wait for two minutes.




Q: What did bella say when the shops ran low off the glitter?
A: yeeew!!! Edward you suck!!!!
Whether you hate Twilight so much it fills you with a burning rage so powerful it's full extent can only be expressed through the medium of interpretive dance, or love it so much you plan to sail out to international waters to avoid those pesky laws that prevent you from marrying a book, or perhaps even exist in the non crazy middleground between the two, overexposure can be a pain. Especially when it gets to the level where suddenly everything becomes linked to Twilight. You hear the name 'Edward', you think 'Cullen', the word 'sparkles' you think 'vampire', the words 'howler monkey' you think...
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Yes, it's true, everyone! Twilight has changed our world in several ways!!

No longer are streets near movie theaters and bookstores safe! I haven't seen even one free from screaming fangirls (and yes, screaming fanboys) when the new movies come out and even after it's all been done for about a month or so. Yeah, there are still girls running around in "I <3 guys that sparkle" t-shirts carring on about how great the twilight movie was at the movie theater in my town.

The world now has fewer trees than ever before, just because there where over millions of pieces of paper used for the twilight...
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As the title suggests out of boredom I made a family out of the kittehs here who I talk to most, giving kittehs roles within the family from how I view them.

God:
The God of the family is Bastet, She is mighty and furry, and I give Her daily offerings of cream, catnip and balls of yarn. All hail Her Glorious Fluffiness.

MomCat:
Everyone knows who MomCat is(if you don't its DearHeart), she's loving and kind and nurturing. She keeps us in line and makes sure RenCat(renrae) hasn't had too many blue Smarties.

GodCats (AuntieCats and GodMotherCats didn't sound right):
These two I view as funny and kind...
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posted by kayleebabee
this is a study i have conducted to ask what is the big deal weith twilight and edward cullen I asked my littlesister tasha what she thought of the global phenomenon that has all the worlds women gripped in an edward cullen orgasm.

Me: why do you think Edward Cullen is *shudders violently* hot?
Tasha: (I have made her answers sound like she has n intellectual brain cell through hours of trranslating twilight gibberish) I think it is mostly because he is unnatainable and perfect.
(what she actually said was: squeeeeeeee edward cullen i want him but cant have him because that bitch bella is his...
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posted by monLOVEbrucas
Bella Sawn.... Hmmm.


If my bestfreind has loved me, kissed me, tried to ruin my relationship with my boyfriend, i wouldn't be all cool with him loving my child.... including because she's young and his old.
Bella didn't react properly.
I wanted her to get really mad, i wanted Jacob to be banned from seeing Nessie, not have 10 minutes go by, and his aloud to hold her again.

They say you dont choose love, love choose's you.
I believe in that but Reneseme, didn't get a choice? Somehow this imprinting thing assumes the person the wolfs are going to fall inlove with are going to love them back?

In twilight saga this is the thing i do not understand or get no matter how much i try...
and I just felt the need to let that out LOL even though i have so much more i would like to let out.
Ever since its recent creation I have not been able to stop visiting this spot (Not that it's a problem...haha). I decided to sit down and ponder and from my pondering came this list.

1. Everybody rates EVERYTHING.
I mean EVERYTHING. Nothing goes unrated and everyone always rates fairly.

2. The Forums are always buzzing.
I absolutely love visiting the forums. Someone is always there looking to chat and the comments are sure to put a smile on my face.

3. I can have intelligent and enjoyable conversations
I don't feel like I talk to someone and all they have to say is, "OMG you love (insert...
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posted by xxXsk8trXxx
This article may be offencive to a lot of Twihards. Viewer disgrettion is advised




Edward: Bella,I'm dangerous, stay away.
Bella: But Edward, I love you!
Edward: Me too, but I'm dangerous, so you have to stay away from me
Bella: But Edward, you're the love of my life! We have to be together!
Edward: Fear me and my sparkiling skin! *takes off shirt*
Bella: Wait a second, you sparkle?
Edward: Isn't it frightening?
Bella: No. Sorry to break it to ya Edward, but it's gay
Edward: I kissed Emmet one time...
Bella: How old are you?
Edward: 100
Bella: Eeew! Aren't there laws about 100 year olds and 17 year olds...
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Some of these are intended to be jokey, some are intended to be serious, none are intended to offend :)

1. It helps focus 'recreational hate' into one convenient area. What I consider to be recreational hate is hate that has no real purpose, like an annoying unintentional hobby. Like it's useful hate to hate injustice or animal cruelty, it's recreational hate to hate Paris Hilton or the fact that Sienna Miller is considered a style icon despite the fact that I've never seen her in an outfit that didn't look like she was talked into wearing it by a stylist who secretly hates her guts. Thing...
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posted by AliceHaleCullen
I have noticed, that on the Twilight Series spot if a certain person adds decent content when a certain person is online, it gets rated very low. As much as I am a fan of Twilight, it makes me wonder what it's all about anymore.

It shows how ridiculous the fanbase for it really is when people get bullied and bashed for having an opinion, or adding good content at the wrong time because they don't like the person who has added it.

I'm sure i'm not the first person to mention this, but it has recently caught my attention alot. Spam uploaders who add thousandsof pictures ask everyone to rate there...
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added by Jasper_LUVER
Source: Google
It's called "Daughter of Darkness" by V.C. Andrews.

This book was just aweful. It's about a 17 year old vampire girl named Lorelie Patio (Mary Sue alert!) whos only purpose in life is to be her Daddy's sex slave. This book is filled with shallow evaluations of beauty, anti feminism, poor morals, and disgusting turn of events.

Lorelie has three sisters who are manipulated and emotionally abused by their father. The worst thing about it is that it's never seen as a bad thing. It's disguised as fatherly love. None of the characters recognize the manipulation or abuse. You have to read between the...
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This is under 'opinion' so please don't send any hate, it's just a though I had.

I have read various explainations both on this site and others about things antis point out as plot holes. (Ex: Renessme, Imprinting, Vampire Transformation, ect.) And I think that it's great that some people do think it through and don't just take it because it is what was written. What I don't understand is why you should have too.

In my mind, when an author creates a story with a new or different breed of creature they should explain it atleast to some degree.

I'm not saying she needs to explain every little thing,...
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posted by XxGigglesxX
1. Twilight is the product of an immature writer. It reads like something out of my notebook from freshman year.
2. The only difference between Twilight and fanfiction.net is marginally better grammar.
3. And even that isn’t so great sometimes. English major fail.
4. I’ve read fanfiction that is lightyears better than Twitripe.
5. The prose is purple amethyst! Deep, luscious, dazzling amethyst that scintillates and glitters incandescently in the sun!
6. Not to mention, it’s also insanely repetitive.
7. THESAURUS ABUSE! Fancy words are not necessarily better words.
8. The storyline is trite and...
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Why this hater doesn't like Twilight.....
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stephenie meyer