We watched them meet…
DEAN: I don't know you at all but I want you to know that I watch you.
RORY: You watch me?
DEAN: Yeah. I stare at you like a stalker while you read about whales. Aren't I sweet?
RORY: Yeah! Hey, why don't I get you a job at Doose's as a bagboy so that all the future guys in my life can make fun of you?
DEAN: Sure! Hey, guess what? I'm annoyingly tall!
We watched them meet each other's families…
DEAN: I know a lot about Willy Wonka! He's my favorite chocolateer!
LORELAI: Er… why don't you join us for our heart attack inducing pig-out?
DEAN: Sure! I'll meet you at your house once I'm done working my strangely long shift.
LORELAI: I'll tell you where I live.
DEAN: That's okay. I already know. I like to stalk Rory, remember?
RORY: Want some cookies?
RORY: No, no! I'm not a drug peddler! I promise!
RORY: Bye! [runs down the street despite the fact that we are told repeatedly that Gilmore Girls do not run]
We watched them fall in love…
RORY: Can you afford all this food?
DEAN: Yeah, I never stop working, remember? Unless, of course, I'm playing tonsil hockey with you.
RORY: Okay. Want to eat any of the food you're buying for me?
DEAN: Nah, I'll just watch you eat.
RORY: That's not creepy… [Rory takes one bite]
DEAN: Okay, you're done! Let's go to the car junk shop. [pulls her by the hand]
RORY: Okay! That doesn't sound dangerous at all!
DEAN: I'm annoying tall!
We watched them break up…
DEAN: I built this car for you.
RORY: Aw! This is definitely structurally sound, especially if it was made by a seventeen year old guy who's either working or kissing me!
DEAN: I love you.
DEAN: I can't believe you're not answering even though I didn't even give you thirty seconds to collect your thoughts and realize that your first boyfriend—that you've been going out for only three months—told you that he loved you.
DEAN: I love you. I love how we only fight over trivial problems and how every time we have different opinions, I make excuses and ignore you until you apologize!
DEAN: Fine! We're over!
RORY: [to Dean's retreating figure] You're annoyingly tall!
We watched them struggle without each other…
RORY: I can't ever buy groceries again.
LANE: Fortunately for you, Taylor banned you after you stole his corn starch.
RORY: That was Dean's fault. He led me to believe I would get free pop and then proceeded to kiss me, causing the first real fight I've had with my abnormally close mother. But, I still miss him?
RORY: He's just so tall! And he makes me feel so safe… [a goofy grin appears on Rory's face]
LANE: Yeah, well so can a straight jacket.
LANE: Hi Science Partner!
DEAN: Your mother just sent me to hell.
LANE: She does that.
DEAN: Should we proceed to totally ignoring our science project and talking about Rory?
DEAN: Does she miss me? Huh? Huh?
LANE: I thought there was an unspoken rule that we weren't going to talk about Rory.
DEAN: I didn't hear any rule…
LANE: That's what an unspoken rule mea—never mind.
We watched them make up…
DEAN: [waiting in front of Chilton because he has nowhere else to be] Oh my god! Rory's talking to another guy! I can't believe how often she totally disregards my feelings!
RORY: [falls over herself to get to the Jolly Green Giant] Dean!
DEAN: Why's he carrying your books?
DEAN: I'm leaving overdramatically!
RORY: No Dean! That hot guy over there who's carrying my books and has a secret crush on me is just a friend! Actually, I hate him!
DEAN: Yeah, right. I don't trust me even though I expect you to trust me blindly and unconditionally!
RORY: Please Dean!
DEAN: I thought you were harassing my sister to try and talk to me. I guess I was wrong. [turns to leave]
RORY: I love you, you idiot!
DEAN: I'm not an idiot! [proceeds to turn around and showcase the most public P.O. I have ever seen on Gilmore Girls]
RORY: How does your neck never hurt?
We watched the jealousy…
DEAN: I hate Jess!
RORY: He's just my friend, Dean!
DEAN: I hate Jess!
RORY: There's nothing going on between us. We just have lots in common, great chemistry, and he's completely adorable!
DEAN: I hate Jess!
RORY: [gazes dreamily into the distance] He does these really cute magic tricks. All you can do is bag grocery items.
DEAN: I hate Jess!
RORY: I hate Jess, too!
We watched them break up… again.
DEAN: I can't believe you're looking at Jess!
RORY: I can't help it if my eyes graze over him from time to time! You're spinning me around so much that I need something to focus on, and your face is too high up.
DEAN: I hate that the two of you are friends!
RORY: Well, you're friends with Lindsay! You know, once she bought me a Mark Twain head magnet. Yup.
DEAN: That's it! I'm going to cruelly and rashly dump you in front of a whole bunch of people and impressively storm out, leaving you along and sobbing in the middle of the dance floor.
We watched them become friends with benefits…
DEAN: Hi. I have two jobs because I love Lindsay.
RORY: What an ungrateful bi—
DEAN: Hey, I changed my mind. Our marriage isn't working out and I'm in love with you!
RORY: Really? Well, I'm lonely and depressed. Let's ruin one of the most important days of my mom's life by sleeping together.
DEAN: Okay! Let's do it on your old, childhood bed because sleeping with a married man isn't awkward enough.
RORY: Okay! By the way, why aren't you and Lindsay working out?
DEAN: Because I treat her like crap since I'm so hung up on you and I refuse to move on and find someone else.
RORY: Cool! I'll mistake that for love and use that excuse for the summer-long estrangement with my mother.
We watched them get together for the THIRD time…
RORY: So, what's going to happen between you and Lindsay?
DEAN: Lindsay? Who's Lindsay?
RORY: Your wife, remember…?
DEAN: Oh, right! Just wait here, okay? I'm going to go divorce my wife and then we can go do it in a car.
DEAN: This relationship is totally awkward and stale but I still love you!
RORY: Yeah… I wonder when Amy Sherman-Palladino is gonna let me ditch you.
We watched them break up AGAIN…
RORY: Oops… I left my boyfriend waiting outside for half an hour. [hurries out]
DEAN: [sees Rory with her friends] This isn't going to work out.
RORY: [exasperated look] Big surprise.
DEAN: I don't fit in here. Look at those big city folk with their fancy suits. I don't even own a suit!
RORY: We can get past that! I'll buy you a suit!
DEAN: No! You have too many friends and I'm the equivalence to an insecure fifteen year old boy! We can't see each other anymore and I'm going to twist and contort the reason until I've convinced everyone, including myself, that it was all your fault.
RORY: Well… bye!
LOGAN: [appears out of nowhere] You just got dumped?
LOGAN: Well, let's get you drunk! Nothing solves problems better than alcohol!
RORY: Okay! Hey, how about later you change me into something I'm not and steal a yacht with me?
LOGAN: Sure, let me just say goodbye to some bridesmaids.
RORY: And I'll go to Philly and shamelessly use Jess!
LOGAN: Meet you in London!
We watched the after affects…
DEAN: Hi Luke.
LUKE: …Er, hi.
DEAN: I'm drunk.
DEAN: I'm drunk and I'm in love with Rory.
LUKE: Thanks for sharing.
DEAN: I'm drunk, I'm in love with Rory, and I spend my evenings playing arcade games away from my wife.
LUKE: Aw, geez.
A little while later outside the Twickam House/Museum…
LUKE: What's up, man?
DEAN: Lorelai's so gonna ditch you.
LUKE: Excuse me?
DEAN: You're screwed, Luke! The Gilmore Girls are sent here by the Devil to play with our hearts and then dump us even though we did nothing wrong!
LUKE: Can I get you some water? Or some Demerol?
DEAN: We're exactly alike! Except for the fact that you're a successful diner owner who's about to get married and live happily ever after with the love of your life, and I'm a bitter, tall divorcee that can't do the simple action of letting go of a girlfriend that I was with when I was sixteen.
LUKE: [at a loss for words] …You're totally insane.
DEAN: [gets frustrated with Luke's lack of caring] I'm annoyingly tall!
LORELAI: Hey... what every happened to Dean Forrester?
RORY: Who cares?