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Finn and Quinn
Public Service Announcement
Glee has lost its touch. It used to be something witty, fun, interesting and full of talent. “Sexy” was confusing, lacking in enthusiasm, overclouded with too many plot lines, and actually had me unmotivated to watch.
First, addressing the music. You know how it is when you listen to music on the radio and there is others in the car? The music is there but it doesn't really influence the drive. It's turned down so you can hear your company. It ends with the DJ talking and cutting off the last few notes.
Glee's music in “Sexy” was to that standard. Gwyneth Paltrow does not have the energy in her singing that Broadway singers like Lea Michele have or the passion and intensity of Amber Riley.
The choice in music was fine, Glee has gotten me to listen to songs I never even heard of, if they had been covered to be something special or sung for a reason. Instead of watching the songs and really getting into them I used 'song-time' to get a drink or read. I was not hanging onto every note or dance move. Then when the Warblers preformed and people were break dancing in kitchen soap all I could say is, 'what's going on?'
Purpose was something painful to search for. Purpose in regards to the music and plot. Informing High School students about sex was the least thought out theme Glee has ever produced, and that theme was supported by a character who appeared once on the show as a fun guest star. There was also a theme about feeling sexy and how that was the key for Warblers' winning regionals, resulting in a random rehearsal number.
The point of no return, in my mind, was only a few minutes in when Will said they were putting aside regionals to focus on sex education. The main driving force for Glee is supposed to be music and banding together to preform and win (so they could earn respect from their fellow classmates.)
The lack of purpose only intensified when the episode ended and Pandora's box was opened letting out a hundred plots to plague our minds without clearly wrapping up any.
I am going to chart the story...
-Celibacy club met
-Brittany refuses to make out with Santana because she's pregnant (Which was probably a real plot line but the writers sobered up just in time to cut it)
-Artie finds out, says his life is over...
THEN we all have a 'laugh' as we find out Brittany believes in Santa- oh, I mean the Stork.
-Emma and Will eat lunch and discuss (while Emma continues to drop hints she is still a virgin with the subtly of a train wreck)
-Holly shows up and sends flirtatious signals at Will (once again, Emma does a great job masking her jealously)
-Holly informs everyone she believes in sex like a religion and knows it backward and forward; explaining how clueless students are regarding sex (If they were as naïve as they played out there would be no teen sexual activity)
-Cut away to an odd aerobic workout program being lead by Holly
-Will is turned on and says Glee needs to change its focus this week from singing to sex education
-Holly sings... for a long time
-Rachel and Quinn look on with anger- then join in (why? Just because Holly's unenthusiastic singing is inviting and contagious)
-Emma says she's disappointed in Will
-Will invites her to sing in support of the -Celibacy Club and she stares at him in confusion -('What? Us sing? The Celibacy Club? Our only two members are from Glee club... you can't possibly imply that.')
-Somewhere in here we cut to Kurt and Blaine who talk to Sue (Don't look for her name again, she never comes back)
-They decide the Warblers need sex appeal and how do you do that? Well, by singing to a bunch of random school girls- complete with uniforms- oh and sticking Kurt in the front because girls are really turned on when a clearly, feminine, gay teenage boy sings to them... Ah, what a dream...
-Kurt tries to make flirtatious expressions but fails miserably so Blaine informs Kurt
-Cut back to Glee club- Puck and Lauren are going to make a sex tape because Lauren wants to be famous
-They watch pornography in the school library
-Holly sees this and says sex tapes don't work, and they will be tried for child pornography if they do make one (This plot line almost ends but never is really confirmed with anything other than an 'oh')
-Holly and Will dance a tango and sing 'Kiss' (which begins with Will making a really awkward/strange sound)
-Will says he 'wants her' but Holly turns him down
-Back to Kurt trying to make sexy faces in the mirror but is bad at it
-Blaine tries to tell him about gay sex but Kurt says he likes the romantic aspect better
-Blaine has a long conversation with Burt about how his father forced him to work on cars and how Burt needs to learn about gay sex to teach Kurt (which we solve later with pamphlets)
-Brittany and Santana sit around talking about making out then Brittany introduces 'feelings' and -Santana gets angry so they seek help from Holly
-Holly says they should sing about it with a long, unexciting song preformed from stools (Holly sings lead because when people have problems her addressing the issues for them is quite effective)
-Emma and Carl (why he's there is beyond me) and some others preform 'Afternoon Delight' (which was funny but lacking because of its already humorous use in 'Anchorman')
-Emma finds out 'Afternoon Delight' is not a dessert and Carl looks to Holly for sex counseling
-Burt prepares Kurt to read pamphlets with a parental speech
-Holly pokes fun at doctor shows and prods at Emma and Carl's relationship
-We find out Carl isn't good for Emma like he used to be
-Carl says they only cuddle and he can't touch her without her giggling and pulling away (even though cuddling involves close physical contact for an extensive period of time)
-Emma lets slip she loves Will (a plotline that's been in the backseat for a while and almost got out of the car. However it is not a major part of the rest of the episode.)
-Santana approaches Brittany at the lockers and admits she is really a lesbian
-Santana cries about how she desperately wants to be with the lighthearted comic relief of Glee
-Brittany shoots her down because she loves Artie
-Lauren confronts Puck in the hall and calls him a nerd but ends up kissing him
-Cut to practically the whole Glee club who have joined the Celibacy club
-Quinn has a hickey so we quick cut away to another plotline-
-Quinn fooling around with Finn (and I'm not quite sure why that is so scandalous, they are both single)
-Back to Will and Holly who says she needs to learn about romance
-Will brags about how good he is at it (...because... he:
a) divorced his high school sweetheart
b) did so to get to with another woman
c) got turned down by her
d) slept/fooled around in meaningless physical exploits
e) kissed coach Beast)
-Download songs (but honestly, who will?)
I will admit my order may be off and I might have forgotten a few things but I have only seen 'Sexy' once and do not plan on a second time. This plot was full of holes, deep holes, and jumped around so much it was hard to get into anything. The relationships were all over the spectrum. Characters were being thrown at viewers from everywhere, as if the writers were throwing in cameos as the names came back to them.
Finn and Quinn
The best example of this is Finn's appearance at the end. There was barely five minutes left and he was thrown in with less lines than Josh Groban in 'Acafellas.' Also there was a whole new plotline introduced by Quinn regarding being prom king and queen where Finn responds with hope that their relationship posses more depth than just that. It looks like it will be carried into the next episode but it should not have to be carried. This plotline should have been the beginning of the next episode, instead of a footnote.
Another example is Sue, who fed information to Kurt then left the coffee shop as if remembering she had an appearance on another TV show. She mentions that Kurt has made a dangerous enemy but it goes unaddressed for the rest of the episode. Usually when Sue threatens, something serious is going to happen. Her character is not the type to blindly throw around threats not followed up. Maybe Sue is just smart and escaped the plot when no one was looking.
I wonder heavily why Santana has come out as a lesbian. If it is a way for Glee to become all inclusive it is an ineffective push. Teenage lesbians will have a hard time connecting with Santana.
Santana is popular, attractive and the epitome of male girl-on-girl sexual fantasy. And, concerning her choice in partner, Brittany is of equal popularity and attractiveness. By making Santana a lesbian the writers have done nothing but created the flames for a large male fantasy bonfire.
Why Brittany? Brittany is empty headed enough to believe in Santa and does nothing to the show but overuse screen time with ditsy one-liners. For her to be on the opposite side of a conversation Santana was putting her whole heart into made things look really unbalanced. Heather Elizabeth Morris retained her blank, oblivious stare she wears all the time while Naya Rivera went through hundreds of emotions.
Public Service Announcement
Drinking responsibly, Sex education, Anti bullying...
Are these 'in-your-face' public service announcements going to be the new theme for Glee. Are the writers going to watch 90s PSAs on RetroJunk and make episodes based on those cheesy, twenty second, cartoon segments? If so they already have raps and songs so Glee will have plenty of tunes to select and cover. I am excited to see the episode based on Motorcycle safety, conserving energy, forest fire prevention, and Scruff McGruff guest starring.
The one positive comment I have to make is the 14TV warning before the episode. For a long time Glee has dealt with concepts for an older audience and jokes that are inappropriate for young viewers. Thanks to this warning I made a clear decision that the children in the house would not be walking in and out.
Please, if you want to respond, do so. I would appreciate that if you disagree with my article to explain why. To simply comment along the lines of, 'You're wrong, Glee is awesome! And if you don't like it don't watch it!' will not leave a lasting effect on me. If you really want me to consider your opinion, Give me something to consider.
Thanks for reading