Here another chapter, hope you enjoy it even if the characters are a little OOC ; )
Nolan and Wilson stand a little amazed, then Wilson says : Well, I think it’s working, at least they talk to each other. Thank you, Doctor Nolan.
-You’re welcome Doctor Wilson, so I see you next week, bye.
Cuddy and House arrive in her office, she goes straight to her desk and searches the phone number of the hospital’s lawyer, then she gives it House.
-Here’s the phone number. I hope our lawyer will be able to help you with this stupid wedding and that you won’t get into troubles, she says and smiles sadly.
-Thank you, replies House and looks at her straight in the eyes. I’m really sorry, Cuddy.
-I know, she says, and I’m so sorry for all this … mess up, she adds and she feels some tears rolling down her cheek.
-Are you ok? House asks. He feels how sad she is, but he doesn’t dare to comfort her, he’s scared to screw it up one more time.
-Yes, I’m fine, you can go to work now. And she sits at her desk and begins to work on her computer, without looking at him.
-Ok, I go, House says. He looks at her, hoping she raises her head, but she doesn’t and he goes out her office.
When he comes to his office, Chase is waiting for him.
-Please, not now, Chase, I need to be alone, House says a little brutally.
-I want to have a week holiday and I need your agreement, says Chase firmly.
-Ok, you can take it, now go away, leave me alone.
-You … are ok? asks Chase, surprised that House doesn’t ask him why he wants holidays.
-Yeah, go away and enjoy your holidays!
Chase goes out, he tries to figure out why House acts like this. Of course, he’s feeling bad after the break up, but there must be something else, he seems very weird.
-And? asks Taub.
-Wha… t ? replies Chase, he didn’t see Taub.
-Did House give you your week?
-Yes, he did, so I’ll see you in two weeks, answers Chase with a big smile.
-Really? He gave you a week holidays, just like this? Foreman asks, surprised.
-Yup! So if you don’t mind, I go right now! Bye guys!
-That’s really amazing. I wonder what’s going on with House, Foreman adds.
-And what do you think to take a week off too? Taub asks.
Foreman looks at him with a little smile : Why not? Let’s try!
When they arrive at the door of House’s office, they see House who takes some pills, but it doesn’t look like Vicodin. They look at each other, worried.
-I think you need some holidays, says Foreman by opening the door…
-What? You want holidays too? Ok, fine, then good bye. See you next week, House replies, irritated.
-Yes, but I think you have to rest too after all these events, Foreman says. You seem tired and on the edge.
-If I need some advice, I have Wilson, so go out now!
Taub and Foreman look at each other and leave House alone.
-I think I’m going to tell Wilson there’s something wrong with House, Foreman says.
-Ok, I’m going. See you later.
-Hm, Taub… Are you going to see Rachel?
-Hm, … yeah, probably. She sent me a message, she has a big surprise for me, apparently.
-Ok, I think I’m going to Paris, I have some friends there. So if you want to invite her in my apartment…
-Oh, ok, thanks.
-Doctor Wilson, says Foreman and enters Wilson’s office. May I talk to you?
-Yes. What about ? answers Wilson and waits for an explanation. Foreman seems worried.
-About House. I think he’s gonna do a big mistake.
-And why are you thinking that?
-Because he agreed to give us a week holidays without asking anything. And he took some pills, but not Vicodin.
-Maybe Ibuprofen, you know his leg hurts him a lot since a few weeks.
-I hope so. I just wanted to warn you, so you can talk to him and avoid him some new problems.
-Ok, thank you. Oh … and enjoy your holidays!
Wilson thinks about what Foreman just told him. He has to go and talk to House.
-House? House? Where can he be? Wilson can’t find his friend in his office. Maybe with Cuddy? Well if he’s with her, I’d better not disturb them. I’ll call him tonight.
But House isn’t with Cuddy. He’s sitting in a bar, and has already drunk three whiskies. He’s thinking. What can I do to prove her she can rely on me? But can she really rely on me? I wasn’t there when she needed me the most. And he’s waiting for Arlene. She arranged to meet him here, she said she wanted to talk to him.
-Here you are, good point for you, you’re not late! But obviously, you’re drunk! She adds after a quick look at House.
-So, what do you want? replies House, annoyed.
-Do you remember what I’ve told you? Arlene asks and looks at House straight in the eyes.
-Yes, I remember, but SHE dumped me, not I. So you’d better talk to her, he says sadly.
-I’ll talk to her later. I just want to ask you one thing, House.
-I listen to you, go on with your question and leave me alone!
-Look at me House! Do you love her? She asks and scrutinizes him.
House is a little disconcerted. Why do you feel concerned? It’s between Cuddy and I.
-House, do you love her? Arlene repeats.
After a while, House answers: Yes, I love her, I love her more than anything else, but it’s obviously not enough for her…
-Thank you, I leave you now, Arlene says and goes.
One hour later, House is still sitting in the bar, but he has just drunk one whisky since Arlene left him. He tries to figure out why she came, why she asked him that. But he can’t find a good answer. He’s lost in his thought, when he feels someone next to him. He recognizes her smell. He turns to her, she’s looking at him, her eyes are filled with sadness.
-What do you want, he asks and sighs.
-My mom came to me, she told me she had talked to you, and …
-And ? says House and tries to listen to her, but it’s hard because of the alcohol and because she always takes his breath when he looks at her.
-And she yelled at me because I broke up with you. I had the impression I was still a little girl, and a little girl who made a huge mistake, she says and smiles a little.
-And what do YOU think? Do you regret to dump me? he asks and looks at her in the eyes.
-I … of course I regret House! I love you, but … leaving with you … dealing with my feelings … with Rachel… I … it’s hard, House! she says and lowers the eyes.
House looks at her, he knows she’s right. I understand, he says. You probably took the best decision for you and for Rachel, he adds and stands up. I’m going home, now. See you tomorrow, Cuddy.
Cuddy follows him with the eyes, she craves for this man, but … why is life so difficult? she thinks.
The following days, they avoid each other, they feel sad, frustrated and angry. And the day of the session with Nolan comes.
-Where’s Doctor Cuddy, Nolan asks.
-I don’t know, maybe she forgot we have a session today, Wilson says.
-No, she didn’t forget it, I think the explanation is more simple : she doesn’t want to come anymore, she doesn’t want to see me anymore, House says, sadly.
-Why do you say that, House? Nolan asks. Did something happen last week?
-Her mom came…
-Arlene ? Wilson exclaims.
-Of course, who else? Replies House sarcastically.
-And you think that’s the reason why Cuddy doesn’t come today? Nolan asks.
-And why ?
-Because they probably had an argument and Arlene is not the good and loving mother you find in fairy tale! She must have told her horrible things and Cuddy feels certainly too bad to want to see me again! shouts House, in an angry voice. She probably thinks she’s better without me! And she’s right! I don’t deserve her, I just make her sad, I broke her heart and was never really there for her! I’m too selfish and too screwed up to be happy and to make someone happy. I go, I don’t want to talk anymore, I lost her for ever now, I’ll never be happy again. And House leaves Wilson’s office.
-I’m sorry, Doctor Nolan, I was optimistic for today after last session, Wilson says.
-Don’t worry, Doctor Wilson. I’m sure we’ll see them next week. They need to face their fears, their anger and try to become aware of what they really need.
The week goes by, House and Cuddy keep on avoiding each other. House’s team is coming back from holidays and treats a new patient. House seems to be back to “normal” : he’s the jerk he used to be, he’s cynical, doesn’t’ trust his patient nor the family of the patient, he hides his pain behind sarcasms and irony.
Today is the next session with Nolan. This time, Wilson wants his friends to be there and to talk, he goes first to House’s office.
-House, I need you in my office, he says.
-No, I don’t come, I don’t want to waste more time with this therapy. It just makes me feeling worse.
-House, please, if you come, I’ll do your clinic duty for one week.
House looks at his friend and wonders why Wilson wants him and Cuddy to make up.
-Two weeks and I come, House replies.
-Ok, so go to my office, I’m coming soon.
Then Wilson goes to Cuddy’s office.
-Cuddy, it’s time for the session with Doctor Nolan, and this time you won’t avoid it.
-Wilson, I don’t think that’s a good thing to go to this “therapy”, all I need is some quiet place without House, she says a little annoyed.
-No, no, no, you have no excuse this time. If you don’t come voluntarily, I’ll carry you there, Wilson replies seriously.
Cuddy looks at him, surprised by his behavior. You’re kidding, Wilson. You won’t do that, she says and smiles.
-You wanna bet ? he replies with a smirk.
Cuddy doesn’t know if he’s able to do it, but she likes challenge.
-Ok, what do we bet? she asks, her eyes shining.
-Hm … I don’t know… a dinner ?
-Ok, so now it’s up to you, she says and waits for him to do or say something.
Wilson hesitates, he didn’t think she’d bet with him, he thought she’d be too afraid to risk it and that she would come with him. But now… Wilson nears Cuddy, takes her in his arms and goes to his office with Cuddy in his arms. Everybody looks at them, amazed. Cuddy is totally surprised and blushes a little. As he enters his office with Cuddy in his arms, House and Nolan stop talking to look at this weird couple.
-What does it mean, Wilson! House says, he feels jealous.
-Oh, that’s a bet between Cuddy and I, replies Wilson uncomfortable and blushes a little. Here you are, lady Cuddy, he says and puts Cuddy on the couch.
-Thank you, Wilson, she says embarrassed. She can’t stand House’s glance, she notices the spark of jealousy in his eyes and she feels uneasy.
-Well, as everyone is here, we can start our session, Nolan says.
-So, Doctor Cuddy, House told us last week that your mom came to you. Do you want to talk about it? Nolan asks.
-Hm, I’m not sure it’s interesting, she replies and lowers the eyes.
-Remember, I saw her before she went to you, House says.
-Yeah, you told me, but … why did you see her? her mom didn’t tell her why she saw House first.
-She wanted to know if I love you, House replies and looks at her straight in the eyes. Didn’t she tell you ?
-And what did you answer? Wilson wants to know, because House didn’t tell him why Arlene met him.
-I answer that I love Cuddy, what do you want me to answer? House says, irritated. Even if it doesn’t matter anymore, he adds sadly.
-Why do you think it’s not interesting, Cuddy, Nolan asks.
-Because … she just yelled at me like usual.
-And was she right? Had she a good reason to yell at you?
-No, … yes…
-What did she tell you, Nolan asks.
-She … she told me that like usual I failed in my relationship with someone, and that this time I really screwed it up because House really loves me and cares for me and Rachel. And …
-And ? Nolan asks.
-And that I’m gonna be alone all my life because I’m too complicated and I don’t know what I want nor what I need, Cuddy answers and almost bursts in tears. She stands up and nears the window to hide her tears. She doesn’t want to show her weakness. But the three men can rate that she’s crying silently because of the sobs that shake her shoulders.
-House, what do you think of Cuddy’s mother, Nolan wants to know.
-How do you mean it?
-Let me explain better : Do you think that Arlene was right to talk to you and then to Cuddy, and when I say talk, well you understand, Nolan replies.
-I … I don’t know, I didn’t understand why she wanted to meet me, I knew she was going to Cuddy and that she probably would yell at her, but … the reason why she acted like that remains a mystery for me. You’d better ask her, you know, House says with a little smile as he imagines the scene between Arlene and Nolan.
-That’s what I’m gonna do right now, Nolan says and goes to open the door.
-What ? House, Cuddy and Wilson exclaims all together.
-Ms Cuddy, if you want to come in, please.
And Arlene comes effectively in. She smiles to Nolan, and then looks at House and finally at Cuddy who tries to dry her eyes.
-Cuddy, why are you crying? Arlene asks a little brutally. It’s your fault if you’re alone and if House behaves like a foolish teen.
-Please, Ms Cuddy, don’t be too angry at your daughter, Nolan says. He didn’t expect that Arlene would be so aggressive with Cuddy. She needs help and understanding, she doesn’t need to feel more guilty than she already is.
-She never can have a long lasting relationship! She’s too stubborn and obsessed by her job, and by … him, she says and points her finger at House.
-So you mean that if Cuddy had never been involved in a long lasting relationship it’s because of her job and of House, Nolan asks, interested.
-Yeah, of course. Her job is all her life, I thought you had understood it. Are you sure that you’re a good therapist?
-Mom! Shut up! Doctor Nolan tries to help me and House to … “go back to normal”, Cuddy says irritated and with a quick look at House.
-And why is Wilson here? Arlene wants to know. Is he here to watch over you? You need someone to hold your hand? she says ironically and gives Cuddy a disdaining glance.
-No, no, I … begins Wilson.
-Ms Cuddy, if I ask you to come today it’s because I thought you can help Cuddy and House, not to plunge them more in misery, Nolan says.
-Well, I want to help them, but I’m so angry at them, they really screwed up, it’s obvious they love each other, but they can’t simply be happy with each other because they are both stubborn and stupid, they don’t want to show their weakness, their fears and their pains to the other, they’re moron! Arlene replies in an angry voice. How can you expect to have a relationship if you hide your feelings to each other? she asks to Cuddy and House who are looking at her, amazed.
-I thought you didn’t like me, House says, so why do you want that Cuddy and I go back together?
-I don’t like you, but I like my daughter. I don’t want her to be alone, to be sad and heartbroken, I want to see her with a man on her sides, even if that man is you. You know how long and how much she cried over you? It was awful.
-Mom, stop it, please, it’s not House’s fault, it’s MY fault, Cuddy says sadly and bits her lips.
-Why do you say it’s your fault and not House’s fault, Doctor Cuddy?
-Because … I know him, I know he’s a drug addict, I know he’s screwed up. I thought I could handle all this, but I was wrong, I can’t, she replies in a low voice and gives House a tender look, filled with love and regret. I’m sorry, House, I should have known it couldn’t work, but …
-Stop it, Cuddy, House says and gives her an intense gaze. You’re not the only responsible for all this mess up, I … I should have done better, I … I went back to Vicodin because I couldn’t deal with your death.
-But she’s not dead! Arlene says.
-No, she is not, fortunately. But …, and House stares at Cuddy, he can’t stop to look at her, he loves her so much! But I really thought you would die, Cuddy, and the pain was too strong, the fear to lose you terrified me, I … I had no choice but to take Vicodin, just to be able to be there, with you, to be able to hold your hand without to burden you more with my own pain, I just wanted to be there just for you, just to support you and not to add you my pain. I …, House nears Cuddy, puts his hand on her cheek and caresses it gently, I love you Cuddy, and all I want is you, all I want is to be with you, to love you, to make you happy…
-I know, House, but why didn’t you just tell me that after my surgery, when we knew I was ok?
-I … I don’t know, Cuddy, I think I was scared to lose you because of the Vicodin, … and I was right, House answers, but … I swear, it was the first time since we were together. I need you to detox, only you can give me the strength to get rid out of Vicodin, with you, with your love, I know I’ll succeed, Cuddy. But without you, it’s impossible…
-House, I … I want to believe you, to believe all you say, but … I’m not sure I can deal with all this again, I’m not sure I’ll be able to help you because I … I need help myself, I’m completely lost, I … the only thing I’m sure is that I love you with all my heart and all my soul, she replies and takes his hand, she looks at him straight in the eyes.
-Hm, I think we’d better leave them alone, don’t you think so? Wilson whispers and glances towards the door. Nolan and Arlene look at House and Cuddy, and agree with Wilson. And they leave House and Cuddy alone.
Neither House, nor Cuddy have noticed that Arlene, Wilson and Nolan have left the room, they’re in their own world, just the two of them, nothing more exists than them.
-Cuddy, give me another chance, House says and puts his hands around her waist, he embraces her tight.
-House, I … want to be with you, I want you to be there, next to me, every day and every night, I don’t want to spend another night or another day alone, without you. Forgive me, she says and some tears roll on her cheeks.
-Shh, House says and kisses her gently, softly, and then passionately. When he breaks their kiss to catch his breath back, he looks at her, smiles and says: I’ll never let you alone one day nor one night more, I promise to always be there for you, Cuddy, you’re the only one in my heart, I can’t live without you, I love you… and she kisses him, she puts her body against his as if she wanna make one with him, she moves around his body with tenderness, her body fired with the desire.
-House, come with me now, I’ll give you the day off, I just want to feel your hands on my body, I want you to caress and to kiss all parts of me, I want you to make love with me… and she kisses him passionately. House feels the heat of her body and a huge desire for her invades all his body.
-Cuddy, we have to go right now or at least we have to lock the door and to hope that nobody will hear us, he says and kisses her deeply.
-Lock the door, I can’t wait, I missed you, your body, your hands on me too much, I longed for you too long…
House tries to near the door to lock it but he doesn’t want to let go of her, which complicates a little this simple action. Intertwined, they reach the door, lock it and remove quickly their clothes before they roll on the ground mixing their bodies in a sensual dance.