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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Welcome to another story about a spy named Con Mane. We begin at a Mexican nuclear base.

Con: *runs onto dam*
pilot: *flies past Con*
Con: *ties himself to guardrail*

Con jumped, as the rope slowly let him down toward part of the base. A few minutes later he was inside.

Mexican pony777: *watches T.V.*
Mexican pony484: *goes to bathroon*
Mexican pony556: *leaves bathroom*
Mexican pony484: *reads newspaper*
Con: Beg your pardon. Forgot to knock *K.O's mexican*

From there Con walked into an unlit room when he ran into another pony named John.

John: ¡Señor! ¿Estás solo?
Con: Yes, I'm alone.
John: You're late 0007.
Con: Sorry 0006 I got stuck in the bathroom.
John: Ready to save the day again?
Con: With you, I'm always ready.

The two ponies then walked toward some explosive containers.

John: Set the bomb to go off in 6 minutes. And Con?
Con: Yeah?
John: For Canterlot.
Con: For Canterlot. *sets bomb*
Mexican col: Tenemos intrusos!
John: That can't be good.
Mexicans: *break open door*
Con: *plants bomb* John we've got a breach. ..... John?
Mexican col: Defuse the bomb, and we let your friend live.
John: They're lying Con. Blow them up!
Mexican col: We mexicans are always honest.
John: Blow 'em to hell for Canterlot!
Mexican col: *shoots John*
Con: *sets bomb for 3 minutes*
Mexican col: Surrender now Señor.
Con: *grabs trolley with containers*
Mexicans: *shoot guns*
Mexican col: Wait! You'll blow us all up!
Con: *goes right*
Mexican pony645: *shoots at Con*
Mexican col: *shoots 645*
Con: *continues walking*
Mexican col: Surrender. What you're doing is pointless.
Con: *jumps on conveyor belt shooting barrels*
Mexican col: Now, shoot him!

But Con shot the barrels killing nearly everypony in that room.

Mexican pony284: *starts airplane*
Con: *runs toward airplane*
Mexicans: *shooting at Con*
Mexican pony123 & 125: *ride motorcycles toward Con*
Con: *steals one of bikes*
Mexican pony123: *shoots tire of bike*
Con: *pulls out pilot*
Mexicans: *still shooting at Con*
Mexican col: WAIT!
Con: *drives off cliff*

The colonel thought that Con would use his magic to reappear on the runway, but he didn't. Instead he got in the airplane after driving off the cliff, and left the nuclear facility right when it blew up.

Hi everypony. In case you forgot this is the 4th Con Mane story, and it is called Golden Iris.

Starring
Doughnut Joe as Con Mane
Carrot Top as Eve Moneybit
Pinkie Pie as P
Spike as S
Mexicans as the bad guys
Everyone else as theirselves
John, or 0006
John, or 0006
added by tinkerbell66799
Source: Original Owners (NOT ME!!)
posted by Seanthehedgehog
The sky was starting to turn dark as Rainbow Dash flew back to the house, where Applejack, and Rarity were waiting for her.

Pierce, and Harry returned. They brought more guns, ammo, water, and food.

Applejack: *Nervously pacing the floor* This is taking forever. She should be back by now.
Harry: I don't know what to tell you A,J, but, I think your friend-
Rainbow Dash: *Opens the door* Has just returned.
Rarity: Rainbow!
Applejack: We were so worried about you!
Pierce: Are you okay?
Rainbow Dash: Fine, fine. I killed Flim, now we just need to kill Flam, and we're back in 2016.
Harry: What is...
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Twilight: If somebody had told me when I was a blank flank that one day I'd give a speech to a class at Celestia's School of Magic, I wouldn't have believed it, but.. I hope that I have been up to the task, because I can tell that all of you are and that the future of Equestrian magic is in good hooves.

Spike: (sarcastically) Wow, hehe. That was even better than the first eleven times.

Twilight: Eh, I don't know, Spike. I'd like to be able to get through the whole speech without looking at the cards.

Spike: Come on, Twilight! You can't be nervous about giving a speech to a bunch of magic students!...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: July 2, 1961
Location: Cheyenne, Wyoming
Time: 3:00 PM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Pete: *Inside the station with everyone* Okay. There's thirteen of us. I will be the referee, and the rest of you must choose your teams. Pierce Hawkins, and Nocturnal Mirage are team captains.
Hawkeye: Okay. *Gets in front of everyone with Mirage* My first pick, Metal Gloss.
Metal Gloss: Yay. *Runs to Hawkeye, and kisses him*
Mirage: Why did I have the feeling you would choose her?
Hawkeye: Because she's my wife.
Mirage: Dan, you're on my team.
Dan: I am very pleased by this. *Walks to Mirage*
Hawkeye: Stylo,...
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: EQD, joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: joyreactor, EQD
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: May 25, 1961
Location: Cheyenne, Wyoming
Time: 9:45 AM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Percy and Jeff returned to the yards in time to see Hawkeye arrive in a freight train with Stylo.

Hawkeye: *Stops next to Snowflake's tower*
Stylo: Well it looks like Percy and Jeff just got back from fixing track.
Hawkeye: Let's ask them how it went.
Stylo: I'll do that, you go uncouple these engines from the freight cars.
Hawkeye: I did that last time. You do it!
Jeff: *Uncouples the engines from the freight cars with his magic*
Hawkeye & Stylo: *Looking at Jeff*
Jeff: Neither of you wanted to do it,...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: May 15, 1961
Location: Cheyenne, Wyoming
Time: 10:32 AM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Pete, and Hawkeye told their friends about the auction. Hawkeye also told the other ponies that worked with him.

By the time it was time to go home, Hawkeye stopped in Pete's office.

Hawkeye: How many ponies did you get to join the auction with us?
Pete: Seven.
Hawkeye: I talked to everyone else. Metal Gloss, Mirage, and Dan have a few items to put up for auction.
Pete: Okay. The auction takes place on the 17th. Remember, we need to make over ten thousand dollars.

And on the day the auction took place, it was...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
(Pilot)

WARRNING : I don't mean to offend anyone and everything is only for jokes. No harash feelings.



Welcome to Dan Rants - place filled with my opinion and useless banter!
There will be some offensive stuff and profanity in really small way.
It also include jokes about Canadians. Just kidding Canadians are great.
For first episode I chose something everyone met : community.

Because I dont really consider myself brony anymore doesn't mean I don't take part in community. Let's thru some of basic community members.

The German Brownies - Rare but seen - they love a guy with name Adolf and surname...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Tim, and Julia interrogate the pony in the Ferrari they chased. When it was over, they spoke to Captain Jefferson in his office.

Captain Jefferson: So he's not part of the Low Riders.
Julia: No sir. He just zoomed past us over 100, and that's how the chase started.
Tim: He said he was heading to a business meeting, but when he saw us chasing him, he tried to lose us on the highway.
Julia: How long is he going to be arrested for?
Captain Jefferson: 8 years. Attempting to kill you two didn't bring him any justice.

The Low Riders met up across the street from the train station around 9 O' Clock....
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Sean and Rainbow Dash stopped their cars outside of the barracks they were going to destroy.

Sean: *Using an MK46, and a Smith & Wesson 500*
Rainbow Dash: *Gets out a Striker Shotgun* Let's do this.
Sean: Okay. There's just one more thing we need. *Opens the trunk of his car, and grabs a backpack* Time bombs.
Rainbow Dash: You must have a lot in there.
Sean: Enough to destroy a building three times the size of this one. Let's go. *Walks towards the door. It's locked, so he breaks it down with his machine gun*

Song: link

Sean: *Goes in with Rainbow Dash*
Nazis: *Coming from the right*
Rainbow...
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posted by Canada24
MEANWHILE:

Diamond: ONE VOTE!?.. Silver Spoon! You didn't vote for me?!

Silver Spoon: No, I didn't.

Diamond Tiara: But you're my best friend!

Silver Spoon: Am I? 'Cause I tried to help by mentioning your 'surprise' statue, and suddenly I wasn't even allowed to speak! You could have actually won this election if you just listened to me. You wanna know how? [whispering] Sorry. I'm not allowed to speak.

Diamond Tiera: (growls and storms off).

AppleBloom: Boy. She seems pretty upset.. We should check on her.

Scootaloo: We don't know that she's upset/. Not to a certainty. All we know for sure, is Diamond lost.

Diamond Tiera: (is heard screaming).

Sweetie Belle: What about now?

Scootaloo: Again, not enough evidence. For all we know, she's being murdered.

Sweetie Belle: (as if this ISN'T a reason a for concern) True enough.

AppleBloom: Yes.. But we should go anyway.
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Didont was standing next to his train. It was 9:15.

Nazi Pony: Engineer!! Start your engine!
Didont: *Climbs into his engine's cab*
German Ponies: *Covering up the artillery guns with tarps*
Didont: *Opens the regulator, and blows the whistle. The train starts moving*

There was wheel spin when the train left, but Didont poured some sand onto the tracks to give his engine more traction.

The train was travelling at 30 miles an hour, and most of the surroundings were brick houses.

Meanwhile with the Colonel that we haven't seen since part 2, he was showing up to the yards where his train was getting...
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: facebook, joyreactor, EQD
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Ass Ass Inn

Starring Rainbow Dash as Marisa Sayers
Double Scoop as Lloyd
Saten Twist as Mercury
Pleiades as Joanna
Master Sword as George
Mortomis as Ranger
Blaze as Richard

At the Ass Ass Inn, everyone was sad. A pony was dead.

Lloyd: Mercury was a good boss, a good friend, and-
Mercury: I'm not the one that died.
Audience: *Laughing*
George: It was Donovan who was killed. He was doing a job, killing a pony for creating counterfeit money, when the police shot him to death from behind.
Marisa: He also had some jobs for me.
Ranger: Really?
Richard: What kind of jobs?
Marisa: Blowjobs.
Audience:...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Theme Song: link

Master Sword: Come on Tom, let's go meet the others.
Tom: Right behind you.
Double Scoop: *Standing on street corner*
Aina: *Runs out of her house*
Sunny: Hey, wait for me. *Flying in the middle of the street*
Saten Twist: *Polishing his chain saw, but stops to go meet the others*
Pleiades: *Arrives at corner*
Mortomis: *Standing next to Double Scoop*
Tom: More ponies!!
Snow Wonder: *Arrives in a brand new Corvette*
Heartsong: *Climbs out of a manhole*
Annie: *Arrives on a bicycle*
Blaze: *Flies out of a house window, and lands next to Tom*
Sophie Shimmer: *Gets off of a slow...
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: facebook, joyreactor
posted by Seanthehedgehog
The pony with Jeff
The pony with Jeff
Date: August 9, 1959
Location: Ponyville, Neigh Jersey
Time: 4:00 PM
Railroad: Lehigh Valley

Jeff drove an inspection cart on the train tracks to where the mainline needed to be repaired. Another stallion was with him.

Jeff: So, how long have you been working on this railroad?
Donovan: Since 1941. Before the line was dieselized, I drove lots of high speed passenger trains to Manehattan.
Jeff: Fascinating. *Stops the cart* Is this where we have to repair the line?
Donovan: Yeah.
Jeff: Alright then, let's get to work.
Donovan: How about you? What year did you start working for your railroad?...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
The Story of Corporal Agarn

Theme song

Though he goes on a rage from time to time
He is a very good friend of mine
And in Fort Courage he is well known as
Corporal Agarn

Starring Master Sword as Corporal Agarn
Tom Foolery as Captain Parmenter
Saten Twist as Sargent O' Rourke
Mortomis as Dobbs, the bugler
Snow Wonder as Wrangler Jane
Cosmic Rainbow as Corporal Vanderbilt
Blaze as Corporal Duffy

And introducing the hedgehogs as the Indians.

Sean as Chief Wild Eagle
and Sonic as Crazy Cat

Corporal Agarn was helping Captain Parmenter put weapons in the supply room when this happened.

Dobbs: *Playing...
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