Tom grabbed a sip of water, and then discussed his last topic.
Tom: Yeah, we all love different animals smaller than us while also having four legs.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: But some ponies also love humans. Many love breeding them, riding them, and racing them. Of course, 90% of the entire population around the world loves racing. It doesn't have to be with humans. It mostly involves cars. Many of you may not know this, but you get into races on several different occasions. It mostly involves time. You're in a race to get to work on time, you're in a race to get something from the grocery store, you're in a race to get a good seat in the movie theater, sometimes, you're also in a race to get a good seat at a sporting event.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: And more races occur out there. Baseball, you race against the ball as it gets thrown from one pony to another as you travel between bases.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: Football, you race against other ponies, and try to knock them down so they don't get the ball into your goal zone. Although some would call that chasing, not racing. Depending on the intent of the defensive pony, you could also call it murder.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: But racing itself is also a sport. You've got Nascar, Indycar, rallycross, the Automobile Racing Club of Equestria, Formula 1, or drag racing. Sounds like you have to tow a heavy load.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: But drag racing is literally two cars in a straight line, mostly for a quarter mile, but the distance can also be longer if you so desire. Now, imagine a two mile dragstrip, that would make things really exciting. A quarter mile is just too short. A quarter mile is boring! You have to be braindead to get pleasure out of driving in a straight line for ten seconds.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: When it comes to autoracing, Nascar, and Formula 1 seem to be the most popular. What is the difference between Formula 1, and Formula 2? Nopony seems to know that.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: I tried asking a few strangers on the street. Excuse me, do you know the difference between formula 1, and 2?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: The cars look exactly the same. The tracks look exactly the same. I bet you even the Formula 1 president himself couldn't explain the difference.
Crowd: *Laughing, and clapping*
Tom: Uh, why did we make a Formula 2 again?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom continued, this time with the Nascar.
Tom: There's also been a lot of complaints about how Nascar only has drivers going around on circular tracks. Recently they've been trying to improve that, but now there's been complaints about too many tracks that aren't round enough!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: They can't make up their fucking mind!
Crowd: *Clapping*
Tom: Next they'll probably complain about how there aren't enough tracks shaped like triangles. They only have one in Pennsylneighnia.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: It'll just be a matter of time. Someone will complain about how there aren't enough triangular tracks like the one in Pocono. Or how about rectangles?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: There's also only one rectangular track in Indianapolis.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Nascar fans might start complaining about that too!
Crowd: *Laughing, and cheering*
Tom: Five years ago, they also purchased this group called the Automobile Racing Club of Equestria, or A.R.C.E for short. When you say those four letters together like an actual word, you get arce. You know what that sounds like?
Crowd: *Laughing, and whistling*
Tom: Well it could be just a hunch, but it would explain why the fans are acting like arses.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: I better get going before I give those fans more bad ideas, but thanks for joining me.
Crowd: *Clapping*
Tom: Thank you for coming here, and seeing me in my hometown. My old stomping ground! *Stomps three times on the stage*
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Hopefully I'll see you wonderful mares, and stallions again during my next performance in St. Foalis. Take care, and happy new year!!
Crowd: *Clapping, cheering, and whistling*
While the crowd was cheering, Tom ran off the stage. The stage lights turned off, and the crowd slowly started to leave after the cheering died down.
The End
SeanTheHedgehog Productions. Copyright, January 2023.
Tom: Yeah, we all love different animals smaller than us while also having four legs.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: But some ponies also love humans. Many love breeding them, riding them, and racing them. Of course, 90% of the entire population around the world loves racing. It doesn't have to be with humans. It mostly involves cars. Many of you may not know this, but you get into races on several different occasions. It mostly involves time. You're in a race to get to work on time, you're in a race to get something from the grocery store, you're in a race to get a good seat in the movie theater, sometimes, you're also in a race to get a good seat at a sporting event.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: And more races occur out there. Baseball, you race against the ball as it gets thrown from one pony to another as you travel between bases.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: Football, you race against other ponies, and try to knock them down so they don't get the ball into your goal zone. Although some would call that chasing, not racing. Depending on the intent of the defensive pony, you could also call it murder.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: But racing itself is also a sport. You've got Nascar, Indycar, rallycross, the Automobile Racing Club of Equestria, Formula 1, or drag racing. Sounds like you have to tow a heavy load.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: But drag racing is literally two cars in a straight line, mostly for a quarter mile, but the distance can also be longer if you so desire. Now, imagine a two mile dragstrip, that would make things really exciting. A quarter mile is just too short. A quarter mile is boring! You have to be braindead to get pleasure out of driving in a straight line for ten seconds.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: When it comes to autoracing, Nascar, and Formula 1 seem to be the most popular. What is the difference between Formula 1, and Formula 2? Nopony seems to know that.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: I tried asking a few strangers on the street. Excuse me, do you know the difference between formula 1, and 2?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: The cars look exactly the same. The tracks look exactly the same. I bet you even the Formula 1 president himself couldn't explain the difference.
Crowd: *Laughing, and clapping*
Tom: Uh, why did we make a Formula 2 again?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom continued, this time with the Nascar.
Tom: There's also been a lot of complaints about how Nascar only has drivers going around on circular tracks. Recently they've been trying to improve that, but now there's been complaints about too many tracks that aren't round enough!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: They can't make up their fucking mind!
Crowd: *Clapping*
Tom: Next they'll probably complain about how there aren't enough tracks shaped like triangles. They only have one in Pennsylneighnia.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: It'll just be a matter of time. Someone will complain about how there aren't enough triangular tracks like the one in Pocono. Or how about rectangles?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: There's also only one rectangular track in Indianapolis.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Nascar fans might start complaining about that too!
Crowd: *Laughing, and cheering*
Tom: Five years ago, they also purchased this group called the Automobile Racing Club of Equestria, or A.R.C.E for short. When you say those four letters together like an actual word, you get arce. You know what that sounds like?
Crowd: *Laughing, and whistling*
Tom: Well it could be just a hunch, but it would explain why the fans are acting like arses.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: I better get going before I give those fans more bad ideas, but thanks for joining me.
Crowd: *Clapping*
Tom: Thank you for coming here, and seeing me in my hometown. My old stomping ground! *Stomps three times on the stage*
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Hopefully I'll see you wonderful mares, and stallions again during my next performance in St. Foalis. Take care, and happy new year!!
Crowd: *Clapping, cheering, and whistling*
While the crowd was cheering, Tom ran off the stage. The stage lights turned off, and the crowd slowly started to leave after the cheering died down.
The End
SeanTheHedgehog Productions. Copyright, January 2023.
"I've ruined their friendship once before. I'd rather give up my own memories than let it happen again!"
"I'm sorry too. I may have stopped being mean, but a Great and Powerful friend helped me realize I still wasn't very nice to you. Everyone matters Wallflower. No matter how insignificant or invisible they feel."
"There's over a million books in here."
"Princess Celestia, the last time we saw each other, I was your snide little pupil who betrayed and abandoned you.... I mean that I come before you a changed pony, humbly asking for forgiveness, guidance, and knowledge."
"...Or I can just go, and you never have to see me again."
"I'm sorry too. I may have stopped being mean, but a Great and Powerful friend helped me realize I still wasn't very nice to you. Everyone matters Wallflower. No matter how insignificant or invisible they feel."
"There's over a million books in here."
"Princess Celestia, the last time we saw each other, I was your snide little pupil who betrayed and abandoned you.... I mean that I come before you a changed pony, humbly asking for forgiveness, guidance, and knowledge."
"...Or I can just go, and you never have to see me again."
HELLO , Everypony I Rainbowdash from Cloudsdale won a My Little Pony stuffed animal toy in a prize crane machine took me 6 chances with 5 dollars got it for 5 dollars of Fluttershy the wings have gold glitter on both sides she's awesome and so are you everypony later ! Oh, almost forgot I bought a 8 inch Rainbowdash figure at Family Dollar
it was the last one they had so what does everypony think of the bigger size pony toys they sell at Family Dollar for ten dollars plus did you find any defects in your figure. I have a slight defect in the paint mess up by the eye nothing too major later!
it was the last one they had so what does everypony think of the bigger size pony toys they sell at Family Dollar for ten dollars plus did you find any defects in your figure. I have a slight defect in the paint mess up by the eye nothing too major later!