Death Row in Women’s Prison
Three women are about to be executed. One’’s a brunette, one’’s a redhead, and one’’s a blonde. The guard brings the brunette forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, “Ready! Aim…”
Suddenly the brunette yells, “EARTHQUAKE!!!”
Everyone is startled and throws themselves on the ground while [...]
A blonde gets on an airplane and sits down in the first class section of the plane. The stewardess rushes over to her and tells her she must move to coach because she doesn’t have a first class ticket. The blonde replies, “I’m blonde, I’m smart, I have a good job, and I’m staying in [...]
Blonde at a strip mall
What did the blonde say after he went to the strip mall?
“I was disappointed. Everybody else had their clothes on.”
Why do blondes keep hangers in their cars?
In case they lock themselves out.
A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer (also a blonde). The cop asked to see the blonde’s driver’s license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated. “What does it look like?” she finally asked. The [...]
Best kept secret
At a dinner party, several of the guests were arguing whether men or women were more trustworthy. ‘No woman,’ said one man, scornfully, ‘can keep a secret.’
‘I don’t know about that,’ answered a blonde woman guest. ‘I have kept my age a secret since I was twenty-one.’
‘You’ll let it out some day,’ the man insisted.
A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.After becoming very frustrated with the “no haggle” attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, “Maybe I’ll [...]
A blonde called in inquiring about a travel package to Hawaii. The agent explained their limited travel range. After going over all the agent’s information, she asked, “Well, could I fly to California, and THEN take your train to Hawaii?”
Game of Intelligence
A blonde chick found herself sitting next to a lawyer on an airplane. Bored, the lawyer kept bugging the blonde wanting her to play a game of intelligence (lawyers like easy prey). Finally, the lawyer offered her 10 to 1 odds, said every time the blonde could not answer one of his questions she owed [...]
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, “I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you.”