Rating - K/K+
Word Count - 1396
Small Summary - This is basically Tony and Ziva's reactions to what happened in Masquerade, and the aftermath. Oh yeah, italics indicate flashbacks from the first part of the story. I got really into this fic, but as the day progressed, I found myself less impressed with my writing ability. XD So here goes.......
Persistence of Memory
He gently grabbed her forearm. "Come on, Ziva, please, don't go", his voice croaked with desperation.
She looked at him, her eyes not masking her fear. Her fear, not of the past, but the here and now. What could be. That fear also encased his own heart, but he was willing to face it head on. He realised what she to do and sighing, let her go. Just for a little while. She smiled at him and simply nodded.
Without words, just the silent scream of her ghosts, she walked away, out of her apartment. Out on him. He stood there in contemplating silence for a moment, just the flickering candlelight left to illuminate his thoughts.
Alone.
"Love, as scarring as it is, is it real, if it ain't hurting?"
It was so refreshing, like all the anxiety she felt thinking of Somalia was washing away. She watched as her anxiety swirled round and round in the sink, until the remnants were left, waiting to be evaporated.
Come on Ziva, pull yourself together. She frequently told herself that in Somalia, to keep herself from breaking. At first. She had a lingering hope that NCIS would find her and everything would return to normal. She would be back with her family. Just when she thought nothing short of a miracle could save her, there he was. Her miracle. Sitting there right in front of her. Thoughts of dark rooms and dirty air were long gone when he smiled that famous DiNozzo grin and muttered those words that only Tony would think appropriate in this type of situation. So how was your summer?
As Tony and McGee carried her out, he gently touched her hand and recalled something she'd said from years before. If you stop forcing things, they will come to you. She'd silently laughed to herself then, weakening the pain that had carved itself onto her face for so long.
He'd wanted her to talk about it. Out of everyone in the world, he was the only person who she'd even think about talking to. But she wasn't ready. Not yet. She knew, deep down, he wanted to ease her pain, because it would ease his pain too. She'd seen it in his eyes. But when she gazed into his emerald eyes, desperately searching for the answer, she realised, there would always be more questions. She couldn't relive her experience again, it was too soon, no
matter what way she had to do it. So she walked away, knowing the questions that she didn't know the answers to, would still be there tomorrow. What's another day anyway?
"Tired of breathing, tired of feeling, tired to looking at the past for meaning. Tired of running, tired of searching, tired of trying, but I'm not tired of you."
Hmmm, refreshing. He took another sip of his beer and berated himself for being so pushy. Even "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?" couldn't cheer him up. It always cheered him up. It was a Coen Brothers film!
Things had pretty much gone back to normal since Ziva returned. But there was always this... this "thing" in the air, threatening to be exposed any minute. He just wanted her to talk to him. He just wanted her to not have this burden on her shoulders anymore. He did it for his own selfish reason too, because if she felt pain, he felt it too. But part of him also knew that what she said might have hurt him more, but he still wanted to find out, so she wouldn't be alone, carrying her thoughts everyday.
He was supposed to be there for her. They were friends, partners and he knew they could be something more. He needed her. He told her he couldn't live without her. He meant it. But what was he supposed to say to let her know? When would it be the right time? What if she didn't want to talk about it? There were always going to be 'what if's?'. He loved her, that he knew for sure. When he looked into her chocolate orbs earlier that day, he saw the pain she'd been hiding so well and he'd felt it, deep in his chest. He ached for her.
He fondly remembered that time she asked him if he ever thought about soulmates. He mentally Gibbs Slapped himself numerous times that day. Of all the things in the world to mention, he mentioned Decker? Decker! She'd walked away from him then too. Seemed to be a recurring thing.
He decided to be spontaneous. Grabbing his keys, he headed to the door, leaving "You are my Sunshine" playing the speakers.
Even if you try to and shut me out, I'm staying here because that's what love's about."
"I hope I didn't interrupt anything." he apologised, stepping into her apartment.
"Oh no, no. I was just having some wine and watching a movie." she explained.
He glanced around the room. Candles, a bottle of wine and an open dvd case of The Big Lebowski. "Ah, classic." he smiled, picking up the article in question.
"Coen Brothers. So, of course." she emphasised the last part. She resumed her previous position on the couch, considering the position of the remote control and wine.
"I'm impressed." he smiled, putting the case down.
"Would you like something to drink?" she enquired, removing herself from her seat, "I have beer?"
"No, thanks." he politely refused. He walked toward her, as she was still rummaging through the refridgerator. She closed the door, and found herself merely inches away from Tony. She smiled lightly.
"Ziva, there's a reason I came here." he breathed, feeling the heat in the room rise. "I didn't have this whole epic speech planned. I just grabbed my keys and came here. But from my personal experience, actions speak louder than anyway."
He lightly touched her waist and she didn't pull back. They both leant in, lips barely touching, but the sparks were unbelievable. She cupped his cheek, bringing him deeper into the kiss. It was soft and tender, nothing too demanding of her.
When the fireworks started, she pulled back. "I'm sorry, but it's too soon." she took a step backward, touching her lips and pulling the front of her hair to the back of her head simultaneously. Tony was speechless, both from the kiss and her reaction.
She headed out the door.
He shouted the only words he could think of to stop her. "Ziva, I love you." She stopped dead in her tracks. "There I said it." he gave that innocent smile. The same one he gave her when she returned to NCIS full time.
She walked up to him, stopping herself when their faces were only inches apart. "I love you too, but we can't do this. Not now."
They stared at each other. Into each others souls. He'd never felt so dizzy. This... thing they had, it was rare and he was willing to do whatever it took to keep it.
"Okay."
She needed air. She turned to walk out the door again.
He gently grabbed her forearm. "Come on, Ziva, please, don't go", his voice croaked with desperation.
She looked at him, her eyes not masking her fear. Her fear, not of the past, but the here and now. What could be. That fear also encased his own heart, but he was willing to face it head on. He realised what she had to do and, sighing, let her go. Just a little while. She smiled at him and simply nodded.
Without words, just the silent scream of her ghosts, she walked away, out of her apartment. Out on him. He stood there in contemplating silence for a moment, just the flickering candlelight left to illuminate his thoughts.
Alone.
He stayed there until she came back, just to know she was safe. He wanted to feel her presence while she gone. She gave him a smile that said Just give me some time.
He silently rose from his seat and gave her a look that said Anything for you. and gently closed the door behind him. He knew she would be ready soon, but he was willing to wait however long it took because that's what they did.
Because if you stop forcing things they will come to you.
FIN.
Tell me what ya think! :D
Word Count - 1396
Small Summary - This is basically Tony and Ziva's reactions to what happened in Masquerade, and the aftermath. Oh yeah, italics indicate flashbacks from the first part of the story. I got really into this fic, but as the day progressed, I found myself less impressed with my writing ability. XD So here goes.......
Persistence of Memory
He gently grabbed her forearm. "Come on, Ziva, please, don't go", his voice croaked with desperation.
She looked at him, her eyes not masking her fear. Her fear, not of the past, but the here and now. What could be. That fear also encased his own heart, but he was willing to face it head on. He realised what she to do and sighing, let her go. Just for a little while. She smiled at him and simply nodded.
Without words, just the silent scream of her ghosts, she walked away, out of her apartment. Out on him. He stood there in contemplating silence for a moment, just the flickering candlelight left to illuminate his thoughts.
Alone.
"Love, as scarring as it is, is it real, if it ain't hurting?"
It was so refreshing, like all the anxiety she felt thinking of Somalia was washing away. She watched as her anxiety swirled round and round in the sink, until the remnants were left, waiting to be evaporated.
Come on Ziva, pull yourself together. She frequently told herself that in Somalia, to keep herself from breaking. At first. She had a lingering hope that NCIS would find her and everything would return to normal. She would be back with her family. Just when she thought nothing short of a miracle could save her, there he was. Her miracle. Sitting there right in front of her. Thoughts of dark rooms and dirty air were long gone when he smiled that famous DiNozzo grin and muttered those words that only Tony would think appropriate in this type of situation. So how was your summer?
As Tony and McGee carried her out, he gently touched her hand and recalled something she'd said from years before. If you stop forcing things, they will come to you. She'd silently laughed to herself then, weakening the pain that had carved itself onto her face for so long.
He'd wanted her to talk about it. Out of everyone in the world, he was the only person who she'd even think about talking to. But she wasn't ready. Not yet. She knew, deep down, he wanted to ease her pain, because it would ease his pain too. She'd seen it in his eyes. But when she gazed into his emerald eyes, desperately searching for the answer, she realised, there would always be more questions. She couldn't relive her experience again, it was too soon, no
matter what way she had to do it. So she walked away, knowing the questions that she didn't know the answers to, would still be there tomorrow. What's another day anyway?
"Tired of breathing, tired of feeling, tired to looking at the past for meaning. Tired of running, tired of searching, tired of trying, but I'm not tired of you."
Hmmm, refreshing. He took another sip of his beer and berated himself for being so pushy. Even "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?" couldn't cheer him up. It always cheered him up. It was a Coen Brothers film!
Things had pretty much gone back to normal since Ziva returned. But there was always this... this "thing" in the air, threatening to be exposed any minute. He just wanted her to talk to him. He just wanted her to not have this burden on her shoulders anymore. He did it for his own selfish reason too, because if she felt pain, he felt it too. But part of him also knew that what she said might have hurt him more, but he still wanted to find out, so she wouldn't be alone, carrying her thoughts everyday.
He was supposed to be there for her. They were friends, partners and he knew they could be something more. He needed her. He told her he couldn't live without her. He meant it. But what was he supposed to say to let her know? When would it be the right time? What if she didn't want to talk about it? There were always going to be 'what if's?'. He loved her, that he knew for sure. When he looked into her chocolate orbs earlier that day, he saw the pain she'd been hiding so well and he'd felt it, deep in his chest. He ached for her.
He fondly remembered that time she asked him if he ever thought about soulmates. He mentally Gibbs Slapped himself numerous times that day. Of all the things in the world to mention, he mentioned Decker? Decker! She'd walked away from him then too. Seemed to be a recurring thing.
He decided to be spontaneous. Grabbing his keys, he headed to the door, leaving "You are my Sunshine" playing the speakers.
Even if you try to and shut me out, I'm staying here because that's what love's about."
"I hope I didn't interrupt anything." he apologised, stepping into her apartment.
"Oh no, no. I was just having some wine and watching a movie." she explained.
He glanced around the room. Candles, a bottle of wine and an open dvd case of The Big Lebowski. "Ah, classic." he smiled, picking up the article in question.
"Coen Brothers. So, of course." she emphasised the last part. She resumed her previous position on the couch, considering the position of the remote control and wine.
"I'm impressed." he smiled, putting the case down.
"Would you like something to drink?" she enquired, removing herself from her seat, "I have beer?"
"No, thanks." he politely refused. He walked toward her, as she was still rummaging through the refridgerator. She closed the door, and found herself merely inches away from Tony. She smiled lightly.
"Ziva, there's a reason I came here." he breathed, feeling the heat in the room rise. "I didn't have this whole epic speech planned. I just grabbed my keys and came here. But from my personal experience, actions speak louder than anyway."
He lightly touched her waist and she didn't pull back. They both leant in, lips barely touching, but the sparks were unbelievable. She cupped his cheek, bringing him deeper into the kiss. It was soft and tender, nothing too demanding of her.
When the fireworks started, she pulled back. "I'm sorry, but it's too soon." she took a step backward, touching her lips and pulling the front of her hair to the back of her head simultaneously. Tony was speechless, both from the kiss and her reaction.
She headed out the door.
He shouted the only words he could think of to stop her. "Ziva, I love you." She stopped dead in her tracks. "There I said it." he gave that innocent smile. The same one he gave her when she returned to NCIS full time.
She walked up to him, stopping herself when their faces were only inches apart. "I love you too, but we can't do this. Not now."
They stared at each other. Into each others souls. He'd never felt so dizzy. This... thing they had, it was rare and he was willing to do whatever it took to keep it.
"Okay."
She needed air. She turned to walk out the door again.
He gently grabbed her forearm. "Come on, Ziva, please, don't go", his voice croaked with desperation.
She looked at him, her eyes not masking her fear. Her fear, not of the past, but the here and now. What could be. That fear also encased his own heart, but he was willing to face it head on. He realised what she had to do and, sighing, let her go. Just a little while. She smiled at him and simply nodded.
Without words, just the silent scream of her ghosts, she walked away, out of her apartment. Out on him. He stood there in contemplating silence for a moment, just the flickering candlelight left to illuminate his thoughts.
Alone.
He stayed there until she came back, just to know she was safe. He wanted to feel her presence while she gone. She gave him a smile that said Just give me some time.
He silently rose from his seat and gave her a look that said Anything for you. and gently closed the door behind him. He knew she would be ready soon, but he was willing to wait however long it took because that's what they did.
Because if you stop forcing things they will come to you.
FIN.
Tell me what ya think! :D
