Wicked: A New Musical
Music & Lyrics: Stephen Schwartz
Book: Winnie Holzman
Cast of Characters:
Elphaba............................................. (Witch of the West)
G(a)linda ........................................... (Witch of the North)
Nessarose .......................................... (Witch of the East)
Fiyero................................................ (Scarecrow/ Winkie Prince)
Mme. Morrible.................................... (Press Secretary/Head of Shiz)
Wizard.............................................. (Leader of Oz)
Dr. Dillamond...................................... (Elphaba's Professor/Goat)
Frex.................................................. (Witch's Father)
Melena............................................... (Witch's Mother)
Shen Shen........................................... (Galinda's Friend)
Chistery............................................. (Winged Monkey)
Head Guard......................................... (Ozian Army Member)
Avaric................................................ (Fiyero's Servant)
Professer............................................. (Dillamond's Replacement)
Ensemble Members Portray Winged Monkeys, Ozians, Munchkins, and Guards.
[Scene 1 - No One Mourns The Wicked]
GOOD NEWS, SHE'S DEAD!
THE WITCH OF THE WEST IS DEAD!
THE WICKEDEST WITCH THERE EVER WAS,
THE ENEMY OF ALL OF US HERE IN OZ,
IS DEAD! GOOD NEWS! GOOD NEWS!
Ozian: Look, it's Glinda!
Glinda floats in on a giant bubble
Glinda: It's good to see me, isn't it? (Ozians Agree) No need to respond that was rhetorical. Fellow Ozians:
LET US BE GLAD,
LET US BE GRATEFUL,
LET US REJOICIFY THAT GOODNESS COULD SUBDUE
THE WICKED WORKINGS OF YOU KNOW WHO!
ISN'T IT NICE TO KNOW
THAT GOOD WILL CONQUER EVIL?
THE TRUTH WE ALL BELIEVE'LL BY AND BY
OUTLIVE A LIE
FOR YOU AND...
Ozian: Glinda! Exactly how dead is she?
Glinda: Well, there has been much rumor and speculation... innuendo, outuendo... but let me set the record straight. According to the Time Dragon Clock, the melting occurred at the 13th hour; a direct result of a bucket of water thrown by a female child. Yes, the Wicked Witch of the West is dead!
NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED!
NO ONE CRIES THEY WON'T RETURN!
NO ONE LAYS A LILY ON THEIR GRAVE!
THE GOOD MAN SCORNS THE WICKED!
THROUGH THEIR LIVES OUR CHILDREN LEARN!
WHAT WE MISS WHEN WE MISBEHAVE!
AND GOODNESS KNOWS
THE WICKEDS' LIVES ARE LONELY
THE WICKED DIE ALONE
IT JUST SHOWS WHEN YOU'RE WICKED
YOU'RE LEFT ONLY
ON YOUR OWN
YES, GOODNESS KNOWS
THE WICKEDS' LIVES ARE LONELY
THE WICKED CRY ALONE
NOTHING GROWS FOR THE WICKED
THEY REAP ONLY
WHAT THEY'VE SEWN
Ozian: Glinda, why does wickedness happen?
Glinda: That's a good question; one that many people find confusifying. Are people born wicked, or do they have wickedness thrust upon them? After all, she had a childhood,; She had a father, who just happed to be the governor of munchlinkland (Witch's Parents Enter.)
Frex: I'm off to the assembly, dear.
Glinda: She had a mother, as so many do...
HOW I HATE TO GO AND LEAVE YOU LONELY
THAT'S ALRIGHT IT'S ONLY JUST ONE NIGHT
BUT KNOW THAT YOU'RE HERE, IN MY HEART
WHILE I'M OUT OF YOUR SIGHT!
(Frex Exits. A Lover Runs Into The Room.)
Glinda: And like all families, they had their secrets.
HAVE ANOTHER DRINK, MY DARK EYED BEAUTY,
I'VE GOT ONE MORE NIGHT LEFT HERE IN TOWN,
SO HAVE ANOTHER DRINK OF GREEN ELIXER
AND WE'LL HAVE OURSELVES A LITTLE MIXER
HAVE ANOTHER LITTLE SWALLOW LITTLE LADY,
AND FOLLOW ME DOWN
Glinda: And of course, from the moment she was born she was... well... different!
Midwife: AHHH!! It's coming!
Midwife: The baby's coming!
Frex: And how!
I SEE A NOSE!
I SEE A CURL!
IT'S A HEALTHY, PERFECT, LOVELY LITTLE...
Melena: What is it? What's wrong?
HOW CAN IT BE?
WHAT DOES IT MEAN?
LIKE A FROGGY, FERNY CABBAGE,
THE BABY IS UNATURALLY
Frex: Take it away... Take it away!!!!
Glinda: So you see, it couldn't have been easy!
NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED!
NOW AT LAST, SHE'S DEAD AND GONE!
NOW AT LAST THERE'S JOY THROUGHOUT THE LAND!
AND GOODNESS KNOWS (GOODNESS KNOWS)
WE KNOW WHAT GOODNESS IS (OOOOHHHH)
GOODNESS KNOWS, THE WICKED DIE ALONE (SHE DIED ALONE)
WOE TO THOSE (WOE TO THOSE)
WHO SPURN WHAT GOODNESSES THEY ARE SHOWN!
NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED (GOOD NEWS)
NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED (GOOD NEWS)
NO ONE MOURNS... THE WICKED...
Glinda: Well, this has been fun! But as you can imagine I have much to attend to, what with the Wizard's unexpected departure. So, if there are no further questions...
Ozian: Glinda, is it true you were her friend?
Glinda: Well, I... you see... um... yes.
Glinda: Well, it depends on what you mean by "friend". (She Motions Her Bubble Downward.) I did know her. That is, our paths did cross... at school. But you must understand, it was a long time ago and we were both very young.
[Scene 2 - Dear Old Shiz]
)Scene Fades As Shiz Students Appear. Elphaba Enters With Them.)
O, HALLOWED HALLS AND VINE DRAPED WALLS
THE PROUDLIEST SITE THERE IS.
WHEN GREY AND SEER OUR HAIR HATH TURNED,
WE SHALL STILL REVERE THE LESSONS LEARNED
IN OUR DAYS AT DEAR OLD SHIZ (DEAR OLD SHIZ)
OUR DAYS AT DEAR OLD...
Galinda: Being Wheeled In On A Big Cart Filled With Luggage.
SHIZZZZZZZZZZZ (DEAR OLD SHIZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ)
Frex Wheels Nessarose On Stage.
Elphaba: What?! What are you looking at? Oh, do I have something in my teeth? Okay, let's get this over with. No, I'm not seasick, yes, I've always been green, no, I didn't chew grass as a child.
Elphaba: Oh, this is my younger sister, Nessarose. As you can see, she is a perfectly normal color.
Frex: Elphaba, stop making a spectacle of yourself! I'm only sending you here for one reason...
Elphaba: Yes, I know, to look after Nessarose.
(Frex Holds Out A Box.)
Frex: My precious little girl: a parting gift.
Nessarose: Now, father... (He Pulls Silver Shoes From The Box.) Jeweled shoes!
Frex: As befits the future governor of Munchkinland. Elphaba, take care of your sister. And try not to talk so much! (He Kisses Nessarose And Exits.)
Elphaba: Well what could he have gotten me? I clash with everything!
(Mme. Morrible Enters)
Morrible: Welcome, new students! I am Madame Morrible, headmistress here, at Shiz University. And whether you're here to study logic, literature, or linguification, I know I speak for my fellow faculty members when I say we have nothing but the highest hopes for some of you. Now, regarding room assignments... (Elphaba & Galinda Raise Their Hands. She Notices Galinda First.) Yes, is this regarding room assignments?
Galinda: Oh, Madame, thank you for asking, but I've already been assigned a private suite... (Noticing Her Followers' Disappointment.) But you can all come visit me whenever you want!
Shen Shen: How good of you!
Pfanee: You are so good!
Galinda: No I'm not!
Both: Yes you are!
Galinda: Now stop! (Swishes Her Hair.)
Morrible: Do you have a question?
Galinda: Yes, you see, I am Galinda Upland of the Upper Uplands... I've applied to your sorcery seminar, and indeed that is my sole purpose of attending Shiz; to study sorcery with you. Perhaps you recall my essay, "Magic Wands, Need They Have A Point".
Morrible: Yes... However, I do not teach my seminar every semester, unless, of course, somebody special were to come along.
Galinda: Well, exactly!
Elphaba: We have not yet received our room assignments.
Morrible: Yes, yes, of course! Oh, You must be Miss Nessarose, the governor's daughter. What a tragically beautiful face you have! (Sees Elphaba, snorts)... And you must be.
Elphaba: I'm the other daughter. Elphaba. I'm beautifully tragic.
Morrible: Yes, yes, I'm sure you're very bright.
Galinda: Bright? She's phosphorescent.
Morrible: I don't seem to have you on my list. Oh, well a slight gulch, but not to fret! We'll find someplace to put you.
Galinda: Y'know, I don't even think she read my essay.
Shen Shen: That's so unfair!
Boq: You should say something!
Galinda: Should I?
Pfanee: Do it!
Morrible: Now, which one of you young ladies would like to volunteer to share with Miss Elphaba?
Galinda: Madame Morrible...
Morrible: Thank you dear. Oh, how very good of you!
Morrible: Miss Elphaba, you may share with Miss Galinda.
Morrible: The governor made his concern for your sister's well being quite clear. So, I thought it would be best if she share my private compartment where I can assist her as needed...
Elphaba: But Madame, I've always looked after my sister.
Morrible: Everyone, to your dormitories.
Elphaba: But Madame...
Elphaba: Let her go!!!
(Nessarose's Wheelchair Is Torn From Morrible's Hands And Begins To Wheel Itself Back To Elphaba.)
Morrible: How did you do that?
Galinda: How did she do that?
Morrible: You mean this has happened before?
Elphaba: Uh... Something just comes over me sometimes... I'm sorry, Madame.
Morrible: What? Never apologize for talent! Talent is a gift! Have you ever considered a career in sorcery?
Morrible: I shall tutor you myself, and take no other students.
All Students But Galinda Exit.
Morrible: Oh, Miss Elphaba...
MANY YEARS I HAVE WAITED
FOR A GIFT LIKE YOURS TO APPEAR
WHY I PREDICT THE WIZARD COULD MAKE YOU HIS
MAGIC, GRAND VIZIER!
MY DEAR, MY DEAR,
I'LL WRITE AT ONCE TO THE WIZARD
TELL HIM OF YOU IN ADVANCE
WITH A TALENT LIKE YOURS, DEAR, THERE IS
A DEFIN-ISH CHANCE
IF YOU WORK AS YOU SHOULD
YOU'LL BE MAKING GOOD
Galinda: Madame Morrible...
Morrible: No, not now dearest. (She Exits.)
Glinda: This will just make me a better person. (She simles.
She Runs Off.)
[Scene 3 - The Wizard & I]
DID THAT REALLY JUST HAPPEN?
HAVE I ACTUALLY UNDERSTOOD?
THIS WEIRD QUIRK I'VE TRIED TO SURPRESS OR HIDE
IS A TALENT THAT COULD HELP ME MEET THE WIZARD
IF I MAKE GOOD
SO I'LL MAKE GOOD.
WHEN I MEET THE WIZARD,
ONCE I PROVE MY WORTH,
AND THEN I MEET THE WIZARD,
WHAT I'VE WAITED FOR SINCE
AND WITH ALL HIS WIZARD WISDOM
BY MY LOOKS HE WON'T BE BLINDED
DO YOU THINK THE WIZARD IS DUMB?
OR LIKE MUNCHKINS SO SMALL-MINDED? NO!
HE'LL SAY TO ME "I SEE WHO YOU TRULY ARE,
A GIRL ON WHOM I CAN RELY"
AND THAT'S HOW WE'LL BEGIN,
THE WIZARD AND I
ONCE I'M WITH THE WIZARD,
MY WHOLE LIFE WILL CHANGE,
'CUZ ONCE YOU'RE WITH THE WIZARD
NO ONE THINKS YOU'RE STRANGE
NO FATHER IS NOT PROUD OF YOU,
NO SISTER ACTS ASHAMED,
AND ALL OF OZ HAS TO LOVE YOU
WHEN BY THE WIZARD YOU'RE ACLAIMED
AND THIS GIFT OR THIS CURSE
THAT I HAVE INSIDE
MAYBE AT LAST I'LL KNOW WHY
WHEN WE ARE HAND IN HAND,
THE WIZARD AND I
AND ONE DAY HE'LL SAY TO ME, "ELPHABA,
A GIRL WHO IS SO SUPERIOR,
SHOULDN'T A GIRL WHO'S SO GOOD INSIDE
HAVE A MATCHING EXTERIOR?
AND SINCE FOLKS HERE TO AN OBSURED DEGREE
SEEM FIXATED ON YOUR VERDEGRIS
WOULD IT BE ALRIGHT BY YOU
IF I DEGREENIFY YOU?"
AND OF COURSE THAT'S NOT IMPORTANT TO ME
"ALRIGHT! WHY NOT?" I'LL REPLY
OH, WHAT A PAIR WE'LL BE
THE WIZARD AND I
YES, WHAT A PAIR WE'LL BE
THE WIZARD AND...
UNLIMITED, MY FUTURE IS UNLIMITED
AND I'VE JUST HAD A VISION ALMOST LIKE A PROPHECY
IT SOUNDS TRULY CRAZY
AND TRUE, THE VISION'S HAZY
BUT I SWEAR SOME DAY THERE'LL BE
A CELEBRATION THROUGHOUT OZ
THAT'S ALL TO DO
AND I'LL STAND THERE WITH THE WIZARD
FEELING THINGS I'VE NEVER FELT
AND THOUGH I'D NEVER SHOW IT
I'D BE SO HAPPY I COULD MELT!
AND SO IT WILL BE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
AND I'LL WANT NOTHING ELSE 'TILL I DIE
HELD IN SUCH HIGH ESTEEM!
WHEN PEOPLE SEE ME THEY WILL SCREAM
FOR HALF OF OZ'S FAVORITE TEAM:
[Scene 4 - What Is This Feeling?]
Galinda: Dearest, Darlingest Momsy and Popsicle...
Elphaba: My dear father...
THERE'S BEEN SOME CONFUSION OVER ROOMING HERE AT SHIZ
BUT, OF COURSE, I'LL CARE FOR NESSA...
BUT, OF COURSE, I'LL RISE ABOVE IT...
FOR I KNOW THAT'S HOW YOU'D WANT ME TO RESPOND
THERE'S BEEN SOME CONFUSION FOR YOU SEE MY ROOMATE IS...
UNUSUALLY, AND EXCEEDLINGLY PECULIAR AND ALTOGETHER QUITE IMPOSSIBLE TO DESCRIBE...
WHAT IS THIS FEELING, SO SUDDEN AND NEW?
I FELT THE MOMENT I LAID EYES ON YOU!
MY PULSE IS RUSHING...
MY HEAD IS REELING...
MY FACE IS FLUSHING...
WHAT IS THIS FEELING?
FERVID AS A FLAME,
DOES IT HAVE A NAME?
FOR YOUR FACE
LET'S JUST SAY...
I LOATHE IT ALL!
EVERY LITTLE TRAIT HOWEVER SMALL
MAKES MY VERY FLESH BEGIN TO CRAWL
WITH SIMPLE, UTTER LOATHING
THERE'S A STRANGE EXHILARTION
IN SUCH TOTAL DETESTATION
IT'S SO PURE, SO STRONG!
THOUGH, I DO ADMIT IT CAME ON FAST,
STILL I DO BELIEVE THAT IT CAN LAST!
AND I WILL BE LOATHING, LOATHING YOU
MY WHOLE LIFE LONG!
DEAR GALINDA, YOU ARE JUST TOO GOOD!
HOW DO YOU STAND IT, I DON'T THINK I COULD!
SHE'S A TERROR! SHE'S A TARTAR!
WE DON'T MEAN TO SHOW A BIAS,
BUT GALINDA, YOU'RE A MARTAR!
THESE THINGS ARE SENT TO TRY US!
POOR GALINDA FORCED TO RESIDE
WITH SOMEONE SO DISGUSTICIFIED
WE JUST WANT TO TELL YOU
WE'RE ALL ON YOUR SIDE!
Students: WE SHARE YOURE LOATHING, UNALDULTERATED LOATHING...
Both: WHAT IS THIS FEELING SO SUDDEN AND NEW?
Students: FOR HER FACE, HER VOICE, HER CLOTHING...
Both: I FELT THE MOMENT I LAID EYES ON YOU...
Students: LET'S JUST SAY...
Both: MY PULSE IS RUSHING, MY HEAD IS REELING...
Students: WE LOATHE IT ALL!
Both: OH WHAT IS THIS FEELING?
Students: EVERY LITTLE TRAIT HOWEVER SMALL...
Both: DOES IT HAVE A NAME?
Students: MAKES OUR VERY FLESH BEGIN TO CRAWL...
Students: ................................................ LOATHING!
Both: THERE'S A STRANGE EXILHARATION
Students: ....................................... LOATHING!
Both: IN SUCH TOTAL DETESTATION
Students: ....................................... SO STRONG!
Both: IT'S SO PURE, IT'S SO STRONG!!!
THOUGH I DO ADMIT IT CAME ON FAST,
STILL I DO BELIEVE THAT IT CAN LAST,
Students: ................. LOATHING
Both: AND I WILL BE LOATHING, FOR-FOREVER
Students: LOATHING................... LOATHING....... LOATHING YOU!
Both: LOATHING, TRULY, DEEPLY LOATHING YOU!
Students: ............................ LOATHING, UNADULTERATED LOATHING!!!
Both: MY WHOLE LIFE LONG!!!!
[Scene 5 - Dr. Dillamond's Class]
(The Students Are In Desks As Dillamond Arrives.)
Dillamond: Settle down, now! I have read your most recent essays. And I am amazed to report the progress! Although, some of us still tend to favor form over content... Ms. Glinda.
Galinda: It's GAlinda.
Dillamond: Excuse me... Glinda.
Galinda: I really don't see what the problem is. Every other professor seems to be able to pronounce my name.
Elphaba: Maybe pronouncing your precious name isn't the sole purpose of Doctor Dillamond's life. Maybe he's not like every other professor. Maybe some of us are different.
Galinda: Oh! It seems the artichoke is steamed.
Dillamond: Class, class! Miss Elphaba has a point! As you know, I am the sole Animal on the faculty. The token Goat, as it were. But it wasn't always this way. Oh, dear students, how I wish you could have seen it as it once was. Where you could walk down the halls and see an antelope explicating a sonnet, a snow leopard solving an equation, a wildebeast waxing philosophic. Don't you see, dear students, how our dear Oz is becoming less and less...(looks at Elphaba)... colorful. Now, who can tell me what sent these events into motion?
Elphaba: (Raises hand) From what I've heard, it all started with the great drought.
Dillamond: Exactly. Food grew scarce, people grew hungrier and angrier. And the question became "Whom can we blame?" Can anyone tell me what is meant by the term "Scapegoat"? (Elphaba Raises Hand.) Someone besides Miss Elphaba? Ah yes, Miss Glinda...
Galinda: It's GAlinda... with a GA. I don't see why you can't just teach us history instead of always harping on the past.
Dillamond: Well, perhaps these questions will enlighten you... (Walks Over To The Chalk Board And Turns It Over. On it is written: ANIMALS SHOULD BE SEEN AND NOT HEARD.) Who is responsible for this? I'm waiting for answer... Very well, that will be all for today... You heard me, class dismissed!!!
(All Students Exit Except Elphaba & Nessarose. Dillamond Has His Back Turned To Her.)
Elphaba: You go on ahead, Nessa.
Elphaba: Reading The Board Aloud. "Animals should be seen and not heard..."
Dillamond: Oh, Miss Elphaba, don't worry about me, go along and enjoy your friends.
Elphaba: Oh that's alright, I have no friends. Would you like to share my lunch?
Dillamond: Oh, thank you! How kind.
(She Pulls Out A Candy Bar And Unwraps It. He Takes The Paper and Begins To Eat It. He Sees The Board.)
Dillamond: I seem to have lost my appetite.
Elphaba: You shouldn't let statements like that bother you. I mean, I always do, but you shouldn't.
Dillamond: Oh Miss Elphaba, if it were only a matter of words on a chalkboard. But the things one hears these days... dreadful things! Miss Elphaba...
[Scene 6 - Something Bad]
I'VE HEARD OF AN OX, A PROFESSOR FROM QUOX
NO LONG PERMITTED TO TEACH,
WHO HAS LOST ALL POWERS OF SPEECH.
AND AN OWL IN MUNCHKIN ROCK
A VICAR WITH A THRIVING FLOCK
FORBIDDEN TO PREACH
NOW HE ONLY CAN SCREECH!
ONLY RUMORS, BUT STILL, ENOUGH TO GIVE PAUSE
TO ANYONE WITH PAWS
SOMETHING BAD IS HAPPENING IN OZ
HAPPENING IN OZ?
UNDER THE SURFACE
BEHIND THE SCENES
Elphaba: Dr. Dillamond, are you alright? Shall I fetch you a glass of water?
Dillamond: No, I don't know what came over me.
Elphaba: So, you're saying that there are animals that have, somehow, forgotten how to speak? But, how is that possible?
Dillamond: Well, with so much pressure not to...
Morrible: I heard there was some sort of disturburance in class. Are you alright, Doctor? Oh, Miss Elphaba, you're still here! I thought you would have been on your way to my seminar by now.
Elphaba: Yes Madame, ordinarily I would be but...
Morrible: But what? I do hope I have not misplaced my trust in you. Magic is a very demanderating mistress, and if one has ambitions of meeting the Wizard. I'm sure Doctor Dillamond sees my point.
Elphaba: I'd better go. Doctor Dillamond, if something bad is happening to the Animals then someone has to tell the Wizard. That's why we have a Wizard!
SO NOTHING BAD
NOTHNG ALL THAT BAD
NOTHING TRULY BAAAAHHH...
IT COULDN'T HAPPEN HERE,
[Scene 7 - Fiyero]
(Fiyero & Avaric Enter.)
Avaric: Here we are, sir! Shiz University!
Fiyero: What? Already?
Avaric: Yes, sir.
Fiyero: What a shame. Well, we'll see you soon, Avaric. Don't worry, I won't last longer at this school than I did at any of the others.
Boq: Uh, miss Galinda, I know I'm just a munchkin, but munchkins have feelings too, and I've been trying to tell you mine, for you. But sometimes it seems like you don't even know I'm there.
Galinda: That's not true, Biq.
Galinda: Biq, do you know who that is? That's Fiyero Tiggular, tha Winkie Prince whose reputation is so scandalacious!
(Boq Looks Disgusted. Fiyero Walks Toward Them. Galinda Swishes Her Hair. Fiyero, Noticing Her Strange Behavior, Does The Same.)
Galinda: To Fiyero. Were you looking for something or someone?
Fiyero: Uhhh yea... history... class? I don't know... somewhere?
Boq: History building is way over there my friend...
Galinda: That class just ended!
Fiyero: Oh! Perfect timing! So, uh, what does one do for fun around here?
Galinda: Nothing really... until now...
Boq: We've been studying!
Fiyero: Well, I see that once again the responsibility to corrupt my fellow students falls to me. Fortunately, I'm up for the task.
[Scene 8 - Dancing Through Life]
THE TROUBLE WITH SCHOOLS IS
THEY ALWAYS TRY TO TEACH THE WRONG LESSON
BELIEVE ME, I'VE BEEN KICKED OUT OF ENOUGH OF THEM TO KNOW!
THEY WANT YOU TO BECOME LESS CALLOW, LESS SHALLOW,
BUT I SAY WHY INVITE STRESS IN?
STOP STUDYING STRIFE
AND LEARN TO LIVE
THE UNEXAMINED LIFE...
DANCIN' THROUGH LIFE
SKIMMING THE SURFACE
GLIDING WHERE TURF IS SMOOTH
LIFE IS PAINLESS FOR THE BRAINLESS
THOSE WHO DON'T TRY, NEVER LOOK FOOLISH
DANCING THROUGH LIFE
NO NEED TO TOUGH IT
WHEN YOU CAN SLUFF IT OFF AS I DO
NOTHING MATTERS, BUT KNOWING NOTHING MATTERS
IT'S JUST LIFE, SO KEEP DANCING THROUGH
DANCING THROUGH LIFE
SWAYING AND SWEEPING
AND ALWAYS KEEPING COOL
LIFE IS FRAUGHTLESS
WHEN YOU'RE THOUGHTLESS
THOSE WHO DON'T TRY
NEVER LOOK FOOLISH
DANCING THROUGH LIFE
MINDLESS AND CARELESS
MAKE SURE YOU'RE WHERE LESS TROUBLE IS RIFE
WHOES ARE FLEETING
BLOWS ARE GLANCING
WHEN YOU'RE DANCING
So! What's the most swankified place in town?
Galinda: That would be the Ozdust Ballroom!
Fiyero: Sounds perfect!
LET'S GO DOWN TO THE OZDUST BALLROOM
WE'LL MEET THERE LATER TONIGHT
WE CAN DANCE 'TIL IT'S LIGHT
FIND THE PRETTIEST GIRL
GIVE HER A WHIRL!
RIGHT ON DOWN TO THE OZDUST BALLROOM
COME ON FOLLOW ME!
YOU'LL BE HAPPY TO BE THERE
DANCIN' THROUGH LIFE, DOWN AT THE OZDUST (LIFE!)
IF ONLY BECAUSE DUST IS WHAT WE COME TO!
NOTHIN' MATTERS, BUT KNOWING NOTHING MATTERS
IT'S JUST LIFE!!!
SO KEEP DANCING THROUGH...
Boq: Miss Galinda? I hope you'll save at least one dance for me. I'll be waiting right there, right by your side, waiting, all night.
Galinda: Oh, how very kind, Biq.
Boq: ... Boq...
Galinda: But, do you know what would be even kinder?
SEE THAT TRAGICALLY BEAUTIFUL GIRL?
THE ONE IN THE CHAIR?
IT SEEMS SO UNFAIR
WE SHOULD GO ON A SPREE
AND NOT SHE, GEE
I KNOW SOMEONE WOULD BE MY HERO
IF THAT SOMEONE WERE
TO GO INVITE HER!
Boq: Well, maybe I could invite her!
OH, BIQ, REALLY?
YOU WOULD DO THAT FOR ME?
Boq: I would do anything for you, Miss Galinda. (Walks Over To Nessarose.) Excuse me, Miss Nessarose? There's something I'd like to ask you...
Fiyero: (To Galinda.) You're good.
Galinda: I don't know what you mean. But I do happen to be free tonight, so...
Fiyero: So, I'll be picking you up around eight?
Galinda: After all...
NOW THAT WE'VE MET ONE ANOTHER,
IT'S CLEAR WE DESERVE EACHOTHER!
Galinda: You're perfect!
Fiyero: You're perfect!
SO WE'RE PERFECT TOGETHER
BORN TO BE FOREVER
DANCING THROUGH LIFE!!!
(The Scene Fades To Elphaba and Nessarose.)
Elphaba: It's absurd! This silly, rich boy appears and everyone's off to worship him and some cultish social gathering!
Nessarose: Even me! I'm going! Isn't it wonderful? Boq was too shy to ask me at first, but once Galinda encouraged him...
Nessarose: Don't you dare say another word against her! I'm about to have the first happy night of my life all thanks to Galinda!
FINALLY FOR THIS ONE NIGHT,
I'M ABOUT TO HAVE A FUN NIGHT
WITH THIS MUNCHKIN BOY GALINDA FOUND FOR ME
AND I ONLY WISH THERE WERE
SOMETHING I COULD DO FOR HER TO REPAY HER
WE DESERVE EACHOTHER AND GALINDA HELPED IT COME TRUE
WE DESERVE EACHOTHER, ME AND BOQ
Please, Elphaba, try to understand.
Elphaba: I do...
(The Scene Changes To Galinda, Shen Shen, & Pfanee. Elphaba Remains On The Other Side Of The Stage.)
Galinda: Now I must accessorize myself for Fiyero.
(Shen Shen Pulls The Witch's Hat Out Of One Of Galinda's Hat Boxes.)
Pfanee: Galinda, what in Oz's name!?
Galinda: Now, just pretend you didn't see that. My granny is always giving me the most hideodeous hats. I'd give it away, but I don't hate anyone that much.
Pfanee & Shen Shen: Yes you do!
(They All Stare At Elphaba. Galinda Walks Forward, Meeting Elphaba Half Way.)
Elphaba: Galinda, listen, Nessa and I were talking about you just now...
Galinda: And I was just talking about you! I thought you might want to wear this hat to the party tonight! (Gives Her The Hat.)
IT'S REALLY... UH... SHARP!
DON'T YOU THINK?
Y'KNOW BLACK, IS THIS YEAR'S PINK!
YOU DESERVE EACHOTHER,
THIS HAT AND YOU,
YOU'RE BOTH SO... SMART!
YOU DESERVE EACHOTHER, SO HERE!
OUT OF THE GOODNESS OF MY HEART!
(Galinda Runs Off. Elphaba Laughs At The Sight Of The Hat. She Exits.. The Students Enter And Dance. When This Is Done, Boq And Nessarose Appear, Awkwardly Holding Hands.)
Nessarose: What's in the punch?
Boq: Lemons, and melons, and pears!
Nessarose: Oh my!
I'VE GOT SOMETHING TO CONFESS A
REASON WHY, WELL, WHY I ASKED YOU HERE TONIGHT...
NOW, I KNOW IT ISN'T FAIR.
Nessarose: Oh, Boq, I know why.
Boq: You do?
IT'S BECAUSE I'M IN THIS CHAIR, AND YOU FELT SORRY FOR ME...
WELL, ISN'T THAT RIGHT?
Boq: No... it's because... uh... because...
BECAUSE YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL!
Nessarose: Oh, Boq!
I THINK YOU'RE WONDERFUL!
AND WE DESERVE EACH OTHER, DON'T YOU SEE THIS IS OUR CHANCE?
WE DESERVE EACH OTHER, DON'T WE BOQ?
Boq: You know what? Let's dance!
(They Dance, As Well As The Others Around Them. Finally, Mme. Morrible Runs Up To Galinda.)
Morrible: Oh, Miss Upland?
Galinda: Madame Morrible... What are you doing here?
Morrible: I have something for you. (She Hands Her A Small Wand.)
Galinda: Gasps. Madame... a training wand... How can I ever express my graditution?
Morrible: Oh, don't thank me! This was your roommate's idea, not mine.
Galinda: What? Elphaba?
Morrible: Miss Elphaba requested that I include you in sorcery class. She insisted I tell you this very night or she would quit the seminar.
Galinda: But... why?
Morrible: I have no idea. My personal opinion is you do not have what it takes. I hope you'll prove me wrong... I doubt you will.
She Leaves. Fiyero Comes Up To Galinda.
Fiyero: What is it?
Galinda: I got what I wanted...
Fiyero: Then what's the matter?
Fiyero: Good. Let's dance...
(They Begin To Dance As Elphaba Walks In. They Stop As All The Students Gasp And Make Comments About The Way She Is Dressed. People Then Start Laughing.)
Fiyero: Who in Oz is this?
Galinda: My roommate... please, don't ... stare!
Fiyero: How can you help it?
(Elphaba Takes Off The Hat, Noticing The Comments. She Waits, Then Puts It Back On And Begins To Dance. She Is Alone. There Is No Music.)
Fiyero: Well I'll say this, she doesn't give a twig about what anyone else thinks.
Galinda: Of course does, she just pretends not to... I feel awful...
Fiyero: Why? It's not like it's your fault.
Galinda: Excuse me... (She Walks Over To Elphaba and Clears Her Throat.) May I cut in?
(Galinda Begins Dancing Just As Horribly. The Students Now Accept It, And Begin To Dance Again As The Music Starts.)
DANCING THROUGH LIFE, DOWN AT THE OZDUST
IF ONLY BECAUSE DUST IS WHAT WE COME TO
AND THE STRANGE THING, YOUR LIFE COULD END UP CHANGING
WHILE YOU'RE DANCING THROUGH
[Scene 9 - Sharing Secrets]
Elphaba & Galinda Barge Into Their Suite... (Galinda Is In Hysterics.)
Galinda: Your very first party ever?!
Elphaba: Do funerals count?
Galinda: Your very first party! Oh I know! Let's tell each other something we've never told anyone... I'll go first: Fiyero and I are going to be married (squeals).
Elphaba: Really? He's asked you already?
Galinda: No, he doesn't know yet... Now, you tell me a secret.
Elphaba: Like what?
Galinda: Like... Why do you always sleep with this funny, little, green bottle under your pillow? (Grabs The Bottle.)
Elphaba: Give that back!
Galinda: C'mon, tell me. Tell me tell me!
Elphaba: It was my mother's! That's all...
Galinda: (Hands Her The Bottle.) It's not fair. I told you a really good one.
Elphaba: My father hates me.
Elphaba: No, that's not the secret. The secert is, that he has a good reason. It's my fault...
Galinda: What is?
Elphaba: ... That my sister is the way she is. . Pause. You see, when my mother was carrying Nessa, my father was worried that the new baby might come out...
Elphaba: So he made my mother chew milk flowers, day and night. But that made Nessa come too soon, with her little legs all tangled. And my mother never woke up. None of which ever would have happened if not for me.
Galinda: But that was the milkflowers fault, not yours. That may be your secret, Elphaba, but that doesn't make it true. Oh look, it's tomorrow! Elphie... do you mind if I call you Elphie?
Elphaba: Well, it's a little perky.
Galinda: And you can call me... Galinda. So... Elphie... now that we're friends, I've decided to make you my new project!
Elphaba: You really don't have to do that.
Galinda: I know, that's what makes me so nice!
[Scene 10 - Popular]
WHENEVER I SEE SOMEONE LESS FORTUNATE THAN I
AND LET'S FACE IT... WHO ISN'T
LESS FORTUNATE THAN I?
MY TENDER HEART TENDS TO START TO BLEED
AND WHEN SOMEONE NEEDS A MAKEOVER
I SIMPLY HAVE TO TAKEOVER
I KNOW I KNOW
EXACTLY WHAT THEY NEED
AND EVEN IN YOUR CASE...
THOUGH IT'S THE TOUGHEST CASE I'VE YET TO FACE!
DON'T WORRY! I'M DETERMINED TO SUCCEED
FOLLOW MY LEAD
AND YES INDEED
YOU'RE GONNA BE POPULAR
I'LL TEACH THE PROPER PLOYS
WHEN YOU TALK TO BOYS
LITTLE WAYS TO FLIRT AND FLOUNCE (SQUEALS)
I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT SHOES TO WEAR
HOW TO FIX YOUR HAIR
EVERYTHING THAT REALLY COUNTS TO BE POPULAR
I KNOW ABOUT POPULAR
AND WITH AN ASSIST FROM ME
TO BE WHO YOU'LL BE
INSTEAD OF DREARY WHO YOU WERE...
THERE'S NOTHING THAT CAN STOP YOU
FROM BECOMING POPULER...
LA LA LA LA
WE'RE GONNA MAKE YOU POPULAR!
WHEN I SEE DEPRESSING CREATURES
WITH UNPREPOSSESSING FEATURES,
I REMIND THEM ON THEIR OWN BEHALF
TO THINK OF
CELEBRATED HEADS OF STATE
OR ESPECIALLY GREAT COMMUNICATORS
DID THEY HAVE BRAINS OR KNOWLEDGE?
DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH!
THEY WERE POPULAR
PLEASE, IT'S ALL ABOUT POPULAR
IT'S NOT ABOUT APTITUDE
IT'S THE WAY YOU'RE VIEWED
SO IT'S VERY SHREWD TO BE
VERY VERY POPULAR
Elphaba: This is never going to work!
Galinda: Oh Elphie, you mustn't think that way anymore! Your whole life is going to change... and all because of me. Okay, stand... I will turn your frock into a beautiful ball gown! Stand up... (She Picks Up Her Wand And Waves It.) Ball gown!!! (Nothing Happens, So She Repeats.) Ball gown!!! (Still Nothing Happens. She Taps Her Wand On The Bed.) Is this thing on?
Elphaba: Do you want me to try?
Galinda: No, I've got it! (She Throws The Wand Down.) Oh, just wear the frock... it's pretty! Now, I'll show you how to flip your hair: Flip flip. Or you could use your hand. (Demonstrates.) Or, you can use your whole body. (Falls onto bed.) Squeals. Now, for the finishing touch. (Takes flower out of her hair, puts it into Elphaba's.) Why, Miss Elphaba, look at you, you're beautiful. Hands her the mirror.
Elphaba: (After Looking In The Mirror.) I... I have to go.
(She Runs Off.)
Galinda: You're Welcome! (She Admires Herself In The Mirror.)
AND THOUGH YOU PROTEST
I KNOW CLANDESTINELY...
YOU'RE GONNA GRIN AND BEAR IT
YOUR NEW FOUND POPULARITY! (SQUEALS)
LA LA LA LA
YOU'LL BE POPULAR!
JUST NOT QUITE AS POPULAR
[Scene 11 - The Lion Cub]
(The Students Are In Dr. Dillamond's Class In Desks. Elphaba Walks In Outrageously Dressed.)
Elphaba: Flips her hair.. Flip Flip! What?
Fiyero: Nothing, it's just... you've been "Galinda-fied". You don't have to do that , you know?
Dillamond: Alright, take your seats, class! I have something to say, and very little time to say it. This is my last day here at Shiz I am no longer permitted to teach. I want to thank you for your sharing your enthusiasm, your essays, no matter how feebly structured, and even, on occasion, your lunch.
(Mme. Morrible Rushes In.)
Morrible: Doctor Dillamond! I'm so dreadfully sorry.
Elphaba: Madame, we've got to do something.
Dillamond: Miss Elphaba, they can take away my job, but I shall continue speaking out.
Scientist: Come on, goat...
(To Men Begin To Carry Him Out Of The Room.)
Dillamond: They are not telling you the whole story! Remember that, class! Remember that.
(He Is Gone.)
Elphaba: Doctor Dillamond! (After A Pause.) Well, are you just going to sit here in silence?
Morrible: Miss Elphaba, there is nothing we can do. Please take your seat.
Professor: Good afternoon, students!
Morrible: Good afternoon.
Professor: Every day, with every tick of the Time Dragon Clock, in every corner of our great Oz, one hears the silence of progress. For example: this is called a cage!
(He Points To A Cage With A Cloth Draped Over It. He Pulls Off The Cloth, Revealing A Lion Cub Inside.)
Professor: Now, we will be seeing more and more of them in the near future. This remarkable innovation is actually for the Animal's own good...
Elphaba: If this is for his own good, then why is he trembling?
Professor: He's just excited to be here, that's all. (Hits the cage.) Now, as I was saying, one of the benefits of caging a Lion cub while he's young is that he never, in fact, will learn how to speak.
(He Motions The Students Forward, Toward The Cage.)
Professor: That's right! Come closer!
Elphaba: To Fiyero. Can you imagine a world where Animals are kept in cages and they never speak?
Professor: Now, he may seem a bit agitated but that's easily remedied.
Elphaba: What should we do?
Elphaba: Well, somebody has to... Do something!!!
(Sparks Begin To Fly Everywhere. All Students & The Professor Are Moving Uncontrollably Except Fiyero and Elphaba.)
Fiyero: What's happening?
Elphaba: I don't know I got mad...and-
Fiyero: Alright just don't move! And don't get mad at me... (He Grabs The Cage.) Well are you coming?
(She Runs With Him After He Snatches The Lion Cub.)
Elphaba: Careful! Don't shake him!
Fiyero: I'm not!
Elphaba: We can't just let him loose anywhere, you know. We have to find someplace safe...
Fiyero: Don't you think that I realize that? You must think I'm really stupid or something!
Elphaba: No, not really stupid.
Fiyero: Why is it that every time I see you you're causing some sort of commotion?
Elphaba: I don't cause commotions, I am one.
Fiyero: That's for sure.
Elphaba: Oh! So you think I should just keep my mouth shut! Is that what you're saying?
Fiyero: No, I'm...
Elphaba: Do you think I want to be this way? Do you think I want to care this much? Don't you know how much easier my life would be if I didn't?
Fiyero: Do you ever let anyone else talk?
Elphaba: Oh, sorry... But can I just say one more thing? You could have just walked away back there.
Elphaba: So, no matter how shallow and self-absorbed you tend to be...
Fiyero: Excuse me, there's no pretense here. I happen to be genuinely self-absorbed and deeply shallow.
Elphaba: No you're not. Or you wouldn't be so unhappy.
Fiyero: Fine, if you don't want my help...
Elphaba: No, I do! Poor little thing, it's heart is trembling... I didn't mean for...
Fiyero: What did you mean to do? Why was I the only one you didn't do it to?
Elphaba: Oh look, you're bleeding... it must have scratched you. (Referring To A Cut On His Face.)
Fiyero: Yeah... or maybe it scratched me. I better get to safety... I mean the cub... get the cub to safety. (He Walks Off.)
[Scene 12 - I'm Not That Girl]
HEARTS LEAP IN A GIDDY WHIRL
HE COULD BE THAT BOY
BUT I'M NOT THAT GIRL
DON'T DREAM TOO FAR
DON'T LOSE SIGHT OF
WHO YOU ARE
DON'T REMEMBER THAT RUSH OF JOY
HE COULD BE THAT BOY
BUT I'M NOT THAT GIRL
EVERY SO OFTEN
WE LONG TO STEAL
TO THE LAND OF "WHAT-MIGHT-HAVE-BEEN"
BUT THAT DOESN'T SOFTEN THE ACHE WE FEEL
WHEN REALITY SETS BACK IN
BLITHE SMILE, LITHE LIMB
SHE WHO'S WINSOME, SHE WINS HIM
GOLD HAIR WITH A GENTLE CURL
THAT'S THE GIRL HE CHOSE
AND HEAVEN KNOWS
I'M NOT THAT GIRL
WISHING ONLY WOUNDS THE HEART
I WASN'T BORN FOR THE ROSE AND PEARL
THERE'S A GIRL I KNOW
HE LOVES HER SO
I'M NOT THAT GIRL...
[Scene 13 - To The Wizard]
(Morrible Enters. She Is Carrying An Umbrella And Holds It Over Elphaba To Protect Her From The Rain.)
Morrible: Miss Elphaba, there you are!
Elphaba: Madame Morrible...
Morrible: Oh Miss Elphaba, I finally heard back from the Wizard!
Elphaba: The Wizard?
Morrible: Yes, he wishes to meet you!
Elphaba: He asked for me?
Morrible: Yes! I know how devastated you were the other day for our poor Doctor Dillamond, but I can assure you my dear, as one door closes, another one opens. (She Hands Her A Green Envelope.)
Elphaba: Madame, I don't know what to say! How can I ever thank you? (She Hugs Her.)
Morrible: Oh careful dear, you musn't get wet (She Places The Umbrella Back Over Elphaba's Head.) Oh, I know! (She Waves Her Hands And The Sun Comes Out.) Didn't I tell you? Weather is my specialty. Oz-speed, my dear! Make me proud.
Elphaba: I will, I'll try.
AND THERE WE'LL FINALLY BE
THE WIZARD AND I...
The Scene Reopens At A Train Station.
Conductor: All aboard!
Galinda: Remember, eye contact. And don't forget to tell him how wonderful he is, Wizards love that! And be yourself... well... within reason.
(Boq Wheels Nessarose Onstage.)
Nessarose: Elphaba, I'm so proud of you and I know father would be too. We're all proud, aren't we?
Elphaba: You'll be alright, won't you?
Galinda: She'll be fine! Biq will take care of her, right?
Boq: ...It's Boq... I... I can't do this anymore.
Galinda: Nessa, maybe he's just not the right one... for you.
Nessarose: No, it's me that's not right. Elphaba, just go, I'll be fine.
(She Wheels Herself Offstage.)
Elphaba: Nessa, wait!
Galinda: Let her go. She'll have to manage without you. We all will.
Elphaba: Please, you'll barely even notice I'm gone. Besides, you have Fiyero. Where is he, anyway? Not that I expected him to say goodbye to me. We barely know each other.
Galinda: I don't know him either. He's distant, and moodified, and he's been thinking, which really worrries me. I never knew how much he cared about that old goat.
Galinda: Oh, there he is! Fiyero, over here dearest!
Fiyero: (He Hands Elphaba Flowers.) Elphaba, I'm happy for you.
Galinda: Yes, we are both so happy...
Fiyero: Uh, listen, I've been thinking...
Elphaba: Yes, I've heard.
Fiyero: About that Lion cub and... everything. I think about that day a lot.
Elphaba: So do I.
Galinda: Me too! Poor Doctor Dillamond. It makes one want to... uh... take a stand. So I've been thinking of... uh... changing my name.
Fiyero: Your name?
Galinda: Well, yes! Since Doctor Dillamond had his own way of pronouncing my name, in solidarity and to express my outrage, I will henceforward be known no longer as Galinda, but as simply, Glinda.
Fiyero: Oh well, that's very admirable of you... Glinda. (To Elphaba.) Elphaba, good luck.
(He Runs Off.)
Glinda: There, see?
Glinda: It's Glinda now. Stupid idea, I don't even know what made me say it.
Elphaba: It doesn't matter what your name is, everyone loves you!
Glinda: I don't care! I want him. I don't even think he's perfect anymore and I still want him. This must be what other people feel like. How do they bear it? (They embrace.)
[Scene 14 - One Short Day]
Elphaba: Come with me.
Elphaba: To the Emerald City.
ONE SHORT DAY, IN THE EMERALD CITY...
Glinda: I've always wanted to see the Emerald City!
ONE SHORT DAY, IN THE EMERALD CITY!
ONE SHORT DAY, IN THE EMERALD CITY
ONE SHORT DAY, FULL OF SO MUCH TO DO
EVER WAY THAT YOU LOOK AT THE CITY
THERE'S SOMETHING EXQUISITE
YOU'LL WANT TO VISIT
BEFORE THE DAY'S THROUGH
THERE ARE BUIDLING TALL AS QUOXWOOD TREES
A HUNDRED STRONG
THERE ARE WONDERS LIKE I'VE NEVER SEEN!
Glinda: It's all grand!
Elphaba: And it's all green!
I THINK WE'VE FOUND THE PLACE WHERE WE BELONG
I WANNA BE IN THIS HOI POLLOI
SO I'LL BE BACK FOR GOOD SOMEDAY
TO MAKE MY LIFE AND MAKE MY WAY
BUT FOR TODAY WE'LL WANDER AND ENJOY!
ONE SHORT DAY
IN THE EMERALD CITY
ONE SHORT DAY
TO HAVE A LIFETIME OF FUN
ONE SHORT DAY...
AND WE'RE WARNING THE CITY
NOW THAT WE'RE IN HERE
YOU'LL KNOW WE'VE BEEN HERE
BEFORE WE ARE DONE!
Glinda: All the hustle and bustle! It's all so Ozmopolitan! Elphie... Elphie? C'mon we'll be late for WizOMania.
Elphaba: I want to remember this moment, always. Nobody's pointing, nobody's staring, for the first time, I'm somewhere that I belong.
Glinda: You look positively, emerald!
(The Stage Lights Dim & Wizomania (The Musical)) Begins.
WHO'S THE MAGE
WHO'S MAJOR ITINERARY IS
MAKING ALL OZ MERRIER
WHO'S THE SAGE
SAILED IN TO SAVE OUR POSTERIORS?
WHO'S ENTHUSE ABOUT AIR BALLOONING
HAS ALL OF US HONEYMOONING?
ISN'T HE WONDERFUL?
OUR WONDERFUL WIZARD?
Both: ONE SHORT DAY IN THE EMERALD CITY
Chorus: WHO'S THE MAGE WHO'S MAJOR ITINERARY IS MAKING ALL OZ MERRIER
Both: ONE SHORT DAY TO HAVE A LIFETIME OF FUN
Chorus: WHO'S THE SAGE WHO SAGELY SAILED INTO SAVE OUR POSTERIORS?
WHAT A WAY TO BE SEEING THE CITY!
WHERE SO MANY ROAM TO...
WE'LL CALL IT HOME TO
AND THEN JUST LIKE NOW WE CAN SAY,
"WE'RE JUST TWO FRIENDS,"
TWO GOOD FRIENDS...
TWO BEST FRIENDS...
SHARING ONE WONDERFUL
Ozian Official: The Wizard will see you now!
[Scene 15 - Sentimental Man]
(A Large Head Is Rolled Onstage... It Speaks To The Two... Voice Booming)
Wizard: I am Oz, the great and terrible! Who are you and why do you seek me?
Glinda: Say something!
Elphaba: Uh... Elphaba Thropp your terribleness!
(His Speaks Normally.)
Wizard: Oh? Is that you Elphaba? I didn't realize!
(He Climbs Out Of The Head.)
Wizard: I hope I didn't startle you, it's so hard to make out peoples' faces all the way back there. So, let's see... which is which? Elphaba! (He grabs her hands.) And you must be.
Glinda: Glinda. The Ga is silent.
(Elphaba touches the Oz mask.)
Wizard: I know. It's a bit much is it? But people expect this sort of thing. You have to give people what they want.
Elphaba: I'm so happy to meet you.
Wizard: Well, that's good. 'Cause that's what I love best: making people happy!
I AM A SENTIMENTAL MAN
WHO ALWAYS LONGED TO BE A FATHER
THAT'S WHY I DO THE BEST I CAN
TO TREAT EACH CITIZEN OF OZ AS SON
SO ELPHABA I'D LIKE TO RAISE YOU HIGH
'CUZ I THINK EVERYONE DESERVES THE CHANCE TO FLY!
AND HELPING YOU WITH YOUR ASCENT
ALLOWS ME TO FEEL SO PARENTAL.
FOR I AM
A SENTIMENTAL MAN!
Elphaba: I'm here... we're here to alert you that something bad is happening...
Wizard: Please, I'm the Wizard of Oz. I already know why you've come.
Elphaba & Glinda: Oooo.
Wizard: Of course, you must prove yourself...
Glinda: Prove yourself, prove yourself.
Elphaba: But how?
Wizard: Madame, the book!
Glinda: Madame Morrible...
Wizard: I believe you're well acquainted with my new Press Secretary.
Elphaba: Press Secretary?
Morrible: Oh, yes dearies, I've risen up in the world. You'll find that the Wizard is a very generous man. If you do something for him, he'll do much for you.
Elphaba: What do yhou want me to do?
Wizard: Well, this is my monkey servent, Chistery. He looks so longingly at the birds every morning....
Morrible: So the Wizard was thinking, perhaps, a levitation spell...
Glinda: (Noticing A Book In Morrible's Hands.) Is that the Grimmerie?
Morrible: Yes, the ancient book of spells and enchantments. (Hands It To Elphaba.)
Glinda: (Whispers.) Can I touch it?
Morrlbe: (Whispers.) No!
Elphaba: What funny writing...
Morrible: Well it's a lost language. The lost language of spells.
Wizard: It's kind of a recipe book for change.
Morrible: Don't be discouraged if you can't decipherate it, dearie. I, myself, can only read a spell or two, and that took years and years
AHVEN, TATEY, AVEN TATEY AVEN...
Wizard: (She Continues Chanting.) Oh, Chistery, what a experience you are about to have!
Elphaba: .................................. AH MAY AH TAY ATUM
Wizard: SINCE ONCE I HAVE MY OWN DAY IN THE SKY...
Elphaba: AH MAY AH TAH TAY MAY TU SE SAY TA!
Wizard: I KNOW EVERYONE DESERVES THE CHANCE TO FLY!
(Chistery Screams & Begins To Twitch.)
Elphaba: What happened? Is something wrong?
Morrible: No just a transition, dearie.
Elphaba: No, stop you're hurting him!
Wizard: She's actually done it!
(Chistery Sprouts Wings. And Begins Running Around The Stage.)
Elphaba: NO! Quick, how do I reverse it?
Morrible: You can't!
Morrible: You can't! Spells are irreversible! I knew she had the power, I told you!
Elphaba: You planned all this?
Morrible: Well, you benefit too, dearie! You benefit, too.
Wizard: And this is only the beginning! Look.
(The Other Monkeys Begin To Grow Wings And Fly.)
Morrible: Won't they make perfect spies?
Wizard: You're right, that's a harsh word... how about scouts? That's what they'll be really. They'll fly around Oz! Report any subversive Animal activity.
Elphaba: You can't read this book at all! Can you? That's why you need enemies, and cages, and spies. You have no real power.
Wizard: Exactly... that's why I need you. Don't you see? The world is your oyster, now! You have so many...opportunites. You both do.
Glinda: Thank you, your Ozness.
SINCE ONCE I HAD MY OWN DAY IN THE SKY
I KNOW EVERYONE DESERVES THE CHANCE TO...
(She Runs Off.)
Glinda: Elphie! I am so sorry, your Wizardship. I'll fetch her back! Elphie wait!
(She Runs After Her.)
Wizard: We must get her back. She knows too much.
Morrible: Don't worry! I will handle it.
(He Gets Back In The Head. Speaking, Again, With A Powerful Voice.)
Wizard: Guards, guards! There is a fugitive loose in the palace! Find her, capture her, and bring her to me!
Guards: Yes your Ozness!
[Scene 17 - Defying Gravity]
Glinda: Elphie, wait! Where are you going?
Elphaba: Oh no! There are no more stairs! This might be the attic...
Glinda: Elphaba, listen to me...
Elphaba: I have to barricade the door! (She Picks Up A Broom And Places It Over A Trap Door.)
Glinda: Elphaba, why couldn't you have stayed calm for once instead of flying off the handle?
I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY
I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY NOW
I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY HOW YOU'VE HURT YOUR CAUSE FOREVER
I HOPE YOU THINK YOU'RE CLEVER
I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY! I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY TOO
I HOPE YOU'RE PROUD HOW YOU WOULD GROVEL IN SUBMISSION
TO FEED YOUR OWN AMBISSION
SO THOUGH I CAN'T IMAGINE HOW
I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY
Morrible: Citizens of Oz, there is an enemy that must be found and captured! Believe nothing she says. She's evil. Responsible for the mutilation of these poor, innocent monkeys! Her green skin is but an outward manifestation of her twisted nature! This distortion... this repulsion... this... Wicked Witch!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(The Scene Fades To Elphaba & Glinda.)
Glinda: Don't be afraid...
Elphaba: I'm not... it's the Wizard who should be afraid... of me!
Glinda: Elphie, just say you're sorry before it's too late.
YOU CAN STILL BE WITH THE WIZARD
WHAT YOU'VE WORKED AND WAITED FOR
YOU CAN HAVE ALL YOU EVER WANTED...
Elphaba: I know...
BUT I DON'T WANT IT
NO, I CAN'T WANT IT
SOMETHING HAS CHANGED WITHIN ME
SOMETHING IS NOT THE SAME
I'M THROUGH WITH PLAYING BY THE RULES
OF SOMEONE ELSE'S GAME!
TOO LATE FOR SECOND GUESSING
TOO LATE TO GO BACK TO SLEEP
IT'S TIME TO TRUST MY INSTINCTS
CLOSE MY EYES...
IT'S TIME TO TRY DEFYING GRAVITY
I THINK I'LL TRY DEFYING GRAVITY
AND YOU CAN'T PULL ME DOWN
CAN'T I MAKE YOU UNDERSTAND
YOU'RE HAVING DELUSIONS OF GRANDURE?
I'M THROUHG EXCEPTING LIMITS
'CUZ SOMEONE SAYS THEY'RE SO
SOME THINGS I CANNOT CHANGE,
BUT 'TIL I TRY I'LL NEVER KNOW!
TOO LONG I'VE BEEN AFRAID OF
LOSING LOVE I GUESS I'D LOST
WELL IF THAT'S LOVE,
IT COMES AT MUCH TOO HIGH A COST!
I'D SOONER BUY DEFYING GRAVITY
KISS ME GOODBYE I'M DEFYING GRAVITY
AND YOU CAN'T PULL ME DOWN!
(The Guards Bang On The Locked Door.)
Guard: Open this door, in the name of his supreme Ozness!
Elphaba: Ah May Ah Tay Ah Tum Ditum...
Glinda: (As Elphaba Continues Chanting.) What are you doing?! Stop it! That's what started all this in the first place... that hideous levitation spell! STOP!!!
(Elphaba Stops Chanting.)
Glinda: Well... Where are your wings? Maybe you're not as powerful as you think you are...
(A Broomstick Floats Across The Room Towards Elphaba.)
Elphaba: I told you, Glinda... I did it, I tell ya!
(The Guards Bang On The Door Once Again.)
Elphaba: Quick! Get on!
Elphaba: Come with me... think of what we could do... together.
UNLIMITED, TOGETHER WE'RE UNLIMITED
TOGETHER WE'LL BE THE GREATEST TEAM THERE'S EVER BEEN, GLINDA
DREAMS THE WAY WE PLANNED 'EM
IF WE WORK IN TANDEM
JUST YOU AND I DEFYING GRAVITY
WITH YOU AND I DEFYING GRAVITY
THEY'LL NEVER BRING US DOWN.
Well, are you coming?
Glinda: Elphie, you're trembling... here, put this around you...
(She Drapes A Black Cape Around Her.)
I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY
NOW THAT YOU'RE CHOOSING THIS
Elphaba: You too.
I HOPE IT BRINGS YOU BLISS
I REALLY HOPE YOU GET IT
AND YOU DON'T LIVE TO REGRET IT
I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY IN THE END!
I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY...
(Elphaba Runs Off. The Guards Break Down The Door.)
Guard: There she is! Don't let her get away!
(They Grab Hold Of Glinda.)
Glinda: What in Oz?! Let go of me! Do you hear me? Let go!
Elphaba: It's not her. She has nothing to do with. I'm the one you want. It's me. It's me! (She Rises Up Center Stage Holding Her Broom.)
SO IF YOU CARE TO FIND ME,
LOOK TO THE WESTERN SKY
AS SOMEONE TOLD ME LATELY,
EVERYONE DESERVES THE CHANCE TO FLY!
AND IF I'M FLYING SOLO,
AT LEAST I'M FLYING FREE!
TO THOSE WHO GROUND ME,
TAKE A MESSAGE BACK FROM ME!
TELL THEM HOW I AM DEFYING GRAVITY!!!
I'M FLYING HIGH DEFYING GRAVITY!!!
AND SOON I'LL MATCH THEM IN RENOWN
IN ALL OF OZ...
NO WIZARD THAT THERE IS OR WAS
IS EVER GONNA BRING
LOOK AT HER, SHE'S WICKED
Elphaba: BRING ME DOWN!!!!
Ozians: NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED! SO WE'VE GOT TO BRING HER...
END ACT I