After finally completing Dark Souls, I can say that it has easily become one of my favorite RPGs, and I can not wait for Dark Souls III to come out. There are quite a lot to enjoy about Dark Souls. The combat, the levels, the characters, even the story (Or what incredibly little of a story there is). But I think the best part of Dark Souls has to be the boss battles….. Sometimes. There are some good bosses and there are some… less than spectacular bosses. So, today, I want to share with you all the bosses from this game that I like and dislike. Now, of course, this is my opinion. You may have a different opinion on these bosses than I do, but just remember. Also, no DLC bosses. No Artorias, no Magnus, and not that one dragon whose name is hard for me to remember. This is my opinion. So, try not to get to angry about this. So, with that said, let’s start the list with the worst bosses (Or at the least, my least favorite)
#5: Chaos Witch Quelaag
Yes, I said it. I do not like the Chaos Witch Quelaag. Everyone online said that Quelaag was a nearly impossible boss that took a lot of time, patience, and determination to beat. Me? I just found the fight boring and took too long. Throughout the fight, Quelaag would constantly spit lava at you, which would stay on the ground for a while before fading, and all you could do was just run around her, while she kept swinging her sword. All this fight made me do was wait for a chance to hit her. It could take just a few seconds, but it could also take five minutes. For me, it was usually the latter. I know that this is a very loved boss on the internet, but I just found it boring and kept asking myself throughout the fight “Are you dead yet”? Granted, it could be worse….. like the other four.
Now, what are this boss’s attacks…….. Honestly, I do not know. All I know is that he can copy himself and shoot some magic at you. Other than that, I have no idea what this guy can do. And why is that? Because this is the easiest boss in the entire game, and let me tell you, I never thought I’d have to use the word easy to describe ANYTHING in Dark Souls. But that’s the only thing I can use to describe Pinwheel. He’s pathetically easy. For me, he died in literally four hits. FOUR HITS! With every other boss, I had to strategize my attacks and wait for the right moment to swing and dodge just to survive. Not with Pinwheel. I just walked right up to him and went with the genius strategy of hitting him until he died… riveting.
#3: The Four Kings
Honestly, I thought after another boss fight where you need to fight more than one boss (Will get to that later), I thought the Four Kings would be a lot of fun… I was wrong. Instead, the Four Kings was all kinds of obnoxious. Throughout the fight, they will fire these magic waves at you, which deal a lot of damage, and the worst part is that they do NOT go away and they are heat seeking, so the best thing to do is to just take that magic wave like a man, because if you don’t, you will never be done with it. And it doesn’t help that the Four Kings constantly comes at you with sword and huge magic blasts to harm you. And you gotta love it when the guys gang up on you and constantly stab you. It’s just SO much fun. And the worst part is how you beat them. You have to circle around them and just stab them when they swing. So basically, you gotta get as close as you can to the enemy in a game that taught you that getting close to the enemy can get you killed. What kind of screwed up logic is that?!
#2: Bed of Chaos
Oh my god…. you seriously can’t screw up a boss as badly as this. The Bed of Chaos required you to do three different things. You need to go and cut off the weak spots on each side of the boss, and then you need to kill the boss from inside. However, that’s easier said than done. Getting to the first weak spot isn’t too hard. But after that, it’s all downhill from here. The Bed of Chaos will then grow arms and a large magic blade. The Bed of Chaos will than begin to swipe at you with it’s hands while at the same time trying to stab you with it’s blade. And while this is happening, the goddamn floor is falling underneath you, and if you fall down that hole, you will be rewarded with an instant death. And if that wasn’t bad enough, when you die, you have to go back to the bonfire that is five minutes away right outside of Lost Izalith. That means that you have to walk through the lave, the tunnel, past the fire breathing goblins, past that big brown thing with the mouth on top of it’s head, and down the slide just to get another shot. And after you destroy the second weak spot, you then have to actually fall down the damn hole. So basically, you now have to jump down a hole, which before this, would result in your death. And it still will if you miss the branch. And once you're finally inside the Bed of Chaos, what is the boss's true form? A larva….. that dies in one hit……. Did I mention that this is the dumbest and most disappointing fight in the game?
#1: Capra Demon
Screw this boss. Screw this goddamn boss. There is no good thing about this boss. He sucks no matter what you do. This could either be an incredibly annoying fight or one of the easiest in the game. It could be annoying because you are given no warning before the Capra Demon rushes at you and kills you. Not to mention, his machetes do a one hit kill. And if you can dodge that attack, you’d better watch out for the two demon dogs he has, which will attack you right after he’s done. So not only do you need to worry about his one hit kill swipe, but you also need to watch for the dogs. And since you are in such a small area, dying is not that hard. But, like I said, this can also be incredibly easy, because if you run up the stairs, the Capra Demon will be too slow to catch up for a bit, giving you enough time to kill the dogs, and if you fall once the Capra Demon is at the top, he will follow and be stunned for a bit, giving you enough time to strike before you repeat the process again. This boss was such a useless pile of crap, that they actually reused this guy again as just an enemy in the Demon Ruins. That’s how much this guy sucks. I had more fun fighting the damn Hydra, and that was a mini-boss. When the mini-boss is more fun than a real boss, you failed miserably.
Okay, now, with that out of the way, it is time for us to move on to the better bosses in this game
#5: Asylum Demon
Sure, some may say that the Asylum Demon is very easy. Sure, he’s not as pathetic as Pinwheel (Thank god), but he is still very easy. However, he is hard enough to give the player a challenge. First time you meet him, you aren’t supposed to fight him. You have to run away and try to avoid dying. This is because you don’t have a weapon. And you NEED one. When you meet him again, that is when the real fight starts. What I like best about this boss is that it sets the player up for bosses in a way that is easy to learn, but still has that Dark Souls challenge to it, letting you know that this is as simple as it gets with this game, so be prepared. Sure, he’s no (Insert later boss on this list here), but hey, I like the challenge…… I just wish they didn’t recycle this boss…… TWICE!
#4: Gaping Dragon
There are two ways that this game tries to instill fear from the bosses to the player. The first and most obvious, difficulty. And trust me, we’ve seen that a lot by this point. And then…. there’s design… And the Gaping Dragon has plenty of those designs. OH MY GOD, look at this thing. A dragon would have been bad enough, but now, this thing has a mouth FILLED with sharp teeth. Jaws would be jealous. Not to mention, the fight is pretty fun. Though… it’s a bit too simple. Just dodge his charge attack, strike, and avoid his slam attack. I heard he had an attack where he vomits and it damages your armor, but in my playthrough, I never experienced this fight. So what makes it so good. Obviously. The design is freaking terrifying. And I can tell they were going with that kind of design. And that’s what I like best about the Gaping Dragon. His design made what was just a usual fight for me so much more fun. I would have been pretty bored if it wasn’t for this boss being so well designed. Even the worst bosses have great designs….. Can’t say that saved their boring, frustrating, and just awful fights, though.
#3: Dragon Slayer Ornstein and Executioner Smough
Throughout the game, you have gotten used to focusing on one-on-one boss fights (Except with the Gargoyles and that crappy Capra Demon fight). You have been learning hard to do your best when fighting bosses and would do you’re hardest to beat them… so naturally, when we all came across Ornstein and Smough, we all got our asses kicked. What makes this so much harder is that you now have to fight two bosses at once. And I mean two full bosses. With the Gargoyles, the second boss didn’t come until later in the fight and their health was halved. And that Capra Demon just used enemies. Not Ornstein and Smough. They are both fully formed bosses with a totally filled health bar, and they do not mess around. They both have different strategies for fighting. Ornstein is not as strong, but is so much faster and uses electricity, whereas Smough is slower, but a much heavier hitter and can reach more distances thanks to his size. So, after you kill one, you’d think that would make the fight easier….. Right? Oh, I wish. No, if you kill one, not only do you greatly piss off the other, but they become even stronger. If Smough dies first, Ornstein will pray to his soul and will grow to the size of Smough, giving him the same strength and reach like Smough. If Ornstein is defeated, Smough will just straight up kill him to take his electricity power. Oh, and if you die, you have to do the whole fight over again. But trust me, the satisfaction you get from beating this boss is so incredible, that it makes this boss fight so incredible.
(WARNING: SPOILERS FOR THE GAME’S FINAL BOSS)
#2: Gwyn, Lord of Cinder
Throughout the entire game, you have been ringing bells, collecting souls, and dying and being revived, you’d think you were in a Happy Tree Friends episode (... Why did I make that reference). But when you make it to the final area, The Kiln of the First Flame, you will see that it is filled with ashes and burned stone. And when you make it to the end, what you will find is Gwyn. Throughout the game, you were made to believe that he was a large god like deity with immense strength. Instead, he is a man the same size as you, who is weakened from giving his soul to the flame. And in the fight, he is easily the most aggressive boss fight in the game, hitting you with his hardest and fastest attacks. You NEED a good shield for this fight, cause he will drain your stamina fast in this fight. However, throughout the fight, the music isn’t some epic music giving off the final battle. Instead, it is a very soft and saddening theme, emphasizing Lord Gwyn himself as a man who used his soul to keep the First Flame lit for a short time, and trying to keep you from putting it out (Which you actually can do in one of the endings, just to make it even more depressing). I have to say, for a final boss, it’s not bad.
Before we get to number one, I should talk about the other bosses from the game. Why? Cause shut up. Let’s do this.
Very threatening and a good challenge. Though, with the Pin Resin you get a few minutes before, he’s kinda easy. Even easier if you kill the archers on the tower behind you first.
Ceaseless Discharge (Gross)
Pretty easy and very interesting on how he attacks you, after stealing the treasure on a dead body (Theorized to be his dead sister), but a bit too slow. Also, running to the exit for him to jump at the ledge, making you stab his arm is very well thought out
Seath the Scaleless
Too dull and boring, and that cursed spike attack can go straight to hell
A lot like the number one boss, only not as cool. I still do like how they made is saddening that you are killing a creature whose home you are invading. Very well done
A pretty interesting fight…. I JUST WISHED THEY WOULDN’T FREAKIN’ JUMP ME!
A very threatening looking fight at first, and very annoying when he keeps knocking you off the ledge…. And then you realize that he can’t stand a stab in the ankle and then he becomes a cry baby and falls on the ground taking a rest… Hey, that should be a new thing. I used to be a threatening boss, until I took a sword to the ankle…. On second thought, that really sucks. Forget about that
I understand how he could have been threatening, what with the lava and the lunging attacks…. But I had a phantom helping me, so it was kind easy. Fun, but easy
If you can look past the annoying skeletons that help, than this is a pretty fun boss fight. I really do enjoy rushing at him and stabbing him… even though he took slightly more hits than the Asylum Demon. Also, Nito’s design belongs on a Metal album cover
Is this a boss? A mini-boss, sure, but a boss? Well…… That hole next to him can go to hell….. and I really hated that water attack he shot at you before you could even see him through the trees…. And the Ice Golem things were really unnecessary- Are you sure this is a boss
Again, is this a boss? Well…. at least killing him was satisfying, what with this guy dominating the bridge most of the game.
As for Gwyndolin and Priscilla, I’m not a heartless monster, so I never tried to attack them. And I don’t want to post anymore pictures because I’m almost at my image limit. So, let’s move on to number one. And for those who have played Dark Souls… you all know who it is.
#1: Great Grey Wolf, Sif
I love this boss… It’s perfect. This boss fight perfectly describes Dark Souls in a way I didn’t think was possible. Where do I start (The fight itself, obviously). Sif jumps around the area as much as possibly, wielding a giant sword in it’s mouth to swing at you with. You’d better have a good shield and lot’s of stamina for this fight, because let me tell you, it’s quite the challenge. And trying not to lose stamina during this fight, timing the right time to strike to avoid a huge sword to the face is very satisfying…. until you get him down to one health box. Once Sif is almost dead, he will begin limping, looking injured as he continues to fight, despite that he swings his sword in a much weaker way and can barely stand. And when you finally kill him, you may notice that, unlike the bosses before, you do not feel satisfied. Instead, you feel empty, like you did something wrong. And indeed, you did. Sif is nothing like most of the bosses in the game. Some of the bosses fight to protect something of theirs because they are not willing to give it to a human, while others attack you just for their own sadistic reasons. Sif is nothing like that. Sif only wishes to protect the grave of Artorias, who died protecting Sif years ago. Now Sif sits by Artorias’s grave to protect it, and seeing as you wish to rob the grave obviously isn’t something Sif wants. He doesn’t want to fight, but since you wish to steal from Artorias’s grave, he has no choice but to stop you. And what makes it more heartbreaking is that killing Sif isn’t an option. You HAVE to do this in order to beat the game. And what I think is the best part about this boss fight is that this shows you that this isn’t just a game where you can be a cool and powerful knight, killing everything in your way. This shows that their are consequences for killing something. Sure, the Moonlight Butterfly did it first, but Sif did it better. It shows that Dark Souls isn’t a game that is happy in the slightest. This is a game about the world ending, people dying, and when the endings themselves are bittersweet, no matter which you choose, it’s amazing that out of all of this, Sif is the saddest it gets. And that is what I think makes this the best boss fight in Dark Souls. Can they top it in Dark Souls III? Who knows?
well, there you have it. Did you enjoy the list? Tell me what you thought of it. With that said, I will see you all next time