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posted by Windwakerguy430
It’s that time again. Time for me to talk about a Suda game. Suda games are usually a hit or a miss between audiences. They can become cult classics like No More Heroes and Killer7, or they can be completely forgotten like Diabolical Pitch. His games are only really considered by people who enjoy his style of storytelling and over-the-top gameplay. So it’s no surprise that I enjoy a good portion of his games. And one that I will be talking about today is the overly colorful and bubbly zombie hack n’ slash game, Lollipop Chainsaw



~Story~

Lollipop Chainsaw is a game that follows the young, attractive, and thankfully eighteen-years-old Juliet Starling, captain of the cheerleading squad and also from a family of zombie killers. Equipped with her chainsaw and the living decapitated-head of her boyfriend Nick, Juliet is on a mission to stop the schools outcast, Swan, from destroying the world with the help of the five Dark Purveyors, punk rock, loudmouth Zed, death metal viking Vikke, the hyperdelic hippie Mariska, the funk rock, auto-tuned Josey, and the classic rock-and-roll zombie with an elephant motorcycle, Lewis Legend, all representing a sort of genre of rock music. Along the way, Juliet gets help from her two sister, Cordelia, a take-no-shit sniper, and Rosalind, a hyper teenager, and even gets help from her father, Gideon, who is just every action movie hero you can think of. With the help of her family, her cynical boyfriend, and perverted sensei Morikawa, she has to stop Swan’s plan for destruction. And let me just throw this out there, this game is dumb. This game is really, really, REALLY dumb. And I love it!



~Gameplay~

Lollipop Chainsaw is a game that is filled with really dumb moments. After all, this is a game that has a cheerleader cutting apart zombies with a chainsaw while sucking on lollipops as she cuts their heads off with rainbows and sparkles shooting out while Hey Mickey plays. And yet I love that. Granted, the tutorial level isn’t too great with it’s combat. You have a stun attack and a kill attack. And that’s it. But let me tell you, once you buy the first set of upgrades in the first level, that is when the game starts to pick up, and get real good, in that classic Suda51 fashion. New combos, styles of attacking zombies, and methods of dodging out of an attack and delivering a follow up attack just feel so satisfying once you start to get the hang of it. Having to clear hordes and hordes of zombies with these moves can prove to be real satisfying, as you manage to stun a whole army of them and then cut their heads off, granting you a ton of points and medals. Oh, also, this game is just as much a highscore racking game as it is a normal hack n’ slash game. Sure, points may seem like a whole nothing thing for this game, but when you see that there are points, and you take yourself out of the hack n’ slash mindset and put yourself in an arcade kind of mindset, you’ll see just how much fun it is. Not to mention, Beating Dad’s Score (That’s what it’s called in the game) will grant you a ton of medals that you can use to buy new upgrades, trait boosts, uniforms, and music that you can listen to when playing through the game.



Other things you can do in the combat is enter a sparkle mode where you just start cutting apart zombies like crazy, one hit killing them, and getting more points for it. It’s fun, but only for a limited time. Another thing is the Nick Roulette, where you use a ticket to use any ability of Nick, from Nick Toss, where you swing his head around to kill zombies, Nick Shake where you shake his head to get more money, Nick Popper, where you shoot Nicks head to stun the enemies for multi-kills, and Nick Throw, where you roll his head to kill groups of zombies. While the combat is certainly good, there are some sequences that mix up the combat, with some mini-games. Some of them are okay, like driving around in a tractor while slicing apart zombies while listening to You Spin Me Around by Dead or Alive. Other ones, like Zombie Basketball or the Chainsaw Dash sequences are okay, nothing spectacular. Zombie Basketball leaves as soon as it came, and Chainsaw Dash has a very odd, almost stiff feel to it that keeps it from being perfect. And that scaffolding mini-game and Zombie Baseball can go rot in hell. The scaffolding mini-game throws constant, almost hard to spot crap at you, and if you get hit by one thing, it’s an instant kill and you have to restart the whole thing. Zombie Baseball has a terrible auto-lock with the Chainsaw Blaster, a gun for the Chainsaw, that only sticks on the zombie to aim at, but never stays on them when they move, so it starts to make you feel like everything’s out of control. It doesn’t help that Nick has to cheer every time he passes a base, making more zombies rush at him. Thankfully, most of these are one and done, unlike most games that would have these awful sequences and make you do them several times.



Other things that this game does well is the style of humor. Let me tell you, this game had no right to be super serious and dramatic like No More Heroes 2 or Killer 7, so naturally, it took all serious situations and threw them out the window. This game is full blown insanity and it just goes along with it. This game gives me a similar feeling that Saints Row IV did. Constant banters between Juliet and Nick about fetishes and music references. And the hilarious descriptions of the zombies you find. This is not a game you should play if you are not used to vulgar slang. The characters swear every minute, and zombies will say vulgar trash just for fun. This game feels like a huge parody filled with sex jokes and references. Shit, this game gives me some Panty and Stocking feeling. Shame they didn’t have a PSG costume in the game. The costumes in this game are pretty good. Sure, you have the typical sexy uniforms, but then you get ones like a full bunny costume, a Japanese maid, and some based on anime. There is one from Deadman Wonderland, the edgiest anime of the 2000s. Not one, but two Highschool of the Dead uniforms, proof that it truly is the best anime. And a uniform from this shit anime called Is This a Zombie, a series that people want me to review when they realize that I will never review that trash. The different things you can buy really give this game more replay value, just so you can see what else you can buy if you put the time into it.



A lot of people say that this game is far too short for the price it has on it, and while I would agree, especially at full retail price, I don’t see the short gameplay being a factor. Hell, I see it as being a benefit to this game. The short campaign that is about five to six hours works in the favor of replay. You wanna get to a section because you screwed up on saving one survivor, just skip to that section and save him. Wanna beat Dad’s Score in one area, done. This works in the favor of frequent playthroughs and I don’t have a problem with it. I do have a problem with this game being charged with more than what it’s really worth. Seriously, thirty bucks, at the least! But one thing that is always a staple in Suda games is the boss fights. The boss fights with the Dark Purveyors is some of the best I’ve seen in video games, as is common for Suda games. Having to deal with Zed throwing slang at you that can actually physically harm you to having to fight off Lewis as his motorcycle always changes no matter how much damage is done to it. These bosses add so much creativity to them and just make them stand out more than most hack and slash bosses. No one will remember shit boss #5 from Devil May Cry 2, but I think everyone will remember the first boss of Lollipop Chainsaw… assuming people bought the game in the first place.



~Ending~

~SPOILERS AHEAD~

After Juliet manages to kill off the last of the Dark Purveyors, it’s found out that this was all part of Swan’s plan, as the Dark Purveyors were actually a sacrifice to a much more evil creature. Swan then blows his head off and thus, transforms into the Zombie of All Zombies, Killabilly, a fat, bloated Elvis-looking giant that can shoot lasers, attack you with his long tongue, create a whirlwind to send zombies at you, control cars to run you over, and just in general, make you feel sick just by looking at him. I mean, this is one of the most disgusting bosses I’ve seen, but not too bad. I heard a lot of people say that Lewis was a much more fun boss fight than Killabilly, and I do agree, but I thought that this boss was fine. There’s probably some symbolic bullshit in here somewhere. Suda’s good at doing that. After Gideon sacrifices himself in an explosion from a motorcycle covered in dynamite and grenades to open a hole in Killabilly, Juliet makes her way to the heart of Killabilly to destroy him, but the only way to destroy the heart is for Nick to sacrifice himself and destroy the heart. With a tearful goodbye, Juliet escapes the body of Killabilly, and Nick sacrifices himself to destroy him. But because of his nobel sacrifice, Nick is given a chance to return to earth, but with a new body. I could spoil this, but it’s too funny for me to do that, so you’ll just have to play the game for yourself to find the joke. After that, Nick and Juliet are reunited, and Gideon is also still alive, and the family go home. Now, depending on if you saved all the classmates, you’ll either get the good ending or the bad ending. Knowing me… I got the bad ending. But details.



~Legacy~

Despite the fact that Lollipop Chainsaw was a game that had mixed reception, it still, somehow, became Grasshopper Manufacturer’s highest selling game of all time. Yes, more than No More Heroes, which everyone claims is Suda’s magnum opus (Well, that or Killer 7, but nobody bought Killer 7). Despite falling into obscurity, Lollipop Chainsaw still lives on, with the cosplay community dressing as Juliet in conventions worldwide. Truly a great way to remember a franchise.

~Ranking~

I don’t care what anyone says, I love this game so much. It’s dumb, it’s stupid, it’s borderline retarded, but it’s great. It has fun combat, funny writing, and just an enjoyable game all around. It’s a quick game that you can pick up and play, really giving it that arcade feel, and it’s just a game that I can’t help but come back to time and time again. It may not be Suda’s best game, but it sure as hell is a good game. The minigames may be bad, and it may be short, but it’s still good to me. With that, I give this game the rank of Excavation Worthy.
Yet another fanfic about a show I never had the chance to watch. Now, from what I know, this fanfic is based off of the hit anime, Sailor Moon... A show in which I never got around to watching because I'm an idiot that never looks at popular stuff. Anyway, this fanfic here, named Rini's Horrible Death, is a huge piece of shit that I'm surprised I actually got through it without wanting to find the actul sorce for this fanfic and burn every bit of it. Lets begin, shall we?
So, the whole fanfic is about a character from the show named Serena is getting fed up with Rini always getting in the way...
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So the Shin Megami Tensei franchise is a pretty well known series of games. And I’m not just saying that because it’s really Persona that people care about and Shin Megami Tensei has flown under the radar completely, no I’m not bitter, you’re bitter. Shut up. But this is not about me gushing over how great SMT Nocturne is. There are some people who don’t know about it, or absolute heathens, some of them known as sundaes that are of the plastic variety, that say it’s just bad, which is fine, one is entitled to their opinion no matter how wrong they are. Regardless, Nocturne was a...
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-Chapter 1: An Unforgettable Luncheon

Ring ring.
The doorbell rang. Superintendent Chalmers stood outside, champagne in hand, as he waited patiently. Seymour opened the door, greeted by his employer, who greeted him with a monotone voice
“Well, Seymour, I made it”, Superintendent Chalmers said, “Despite your directions”
“Ah, Superintendent Chalmers! Welcome!” Seymour exclaimed with a smile. “I hope you’re prepared for an unforgettable luncheon”
“Eh”, Chalmers exclaimed in a rather bored tone. He invited himself in, taking a seat at the table, placing the champagne into the...
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So yes, I have had the name for five years. I have always talked about Wind Waker and it being my favorite game ever. And I have talked about it endlessly and why I loved it so much. And even with all the games I have ever played, with all of the games I have experienced and loved, they still never compare. I am aware that they are all better games, technically. Dark Souls has better combat, Resident Evil 4 has more polish, and Metal Gear Solid 3 has a better story. But Wind Waker is different, cause it was the game that came at the right time.
Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker follows Link...
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posted by Windwakerguy430


So, Final Fantasy VI was a good RPG on the SNES. I hear a lot of people say that it is the best. But that can’t be true. Undertale was based on Earthbound, not Final Fantasy VI, so how can it possibly be the best when the best game ever wasn’t inspired by it. Okay, but seriously, this joke is terrible. Here’s Chrono Trigger.
Chrono Trigger takes place in the modern day… of 1999, following Crono, a bright eyed little Akira Toriyama drawn boy who, along with his friends, are send through an adventure across time to stop a space parasite known as Lavos from destroying the world in...
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So I was never too big into sports, and in short, I was never too big into sports games. I have minor understanding of basketball, but only cause my brothers are fans, I never understood the appeal of football, and I think I won’t offend anyone when I say soccer is boring. But I was really interested in the art of skateboarding… until it died and no one cared anymore… The game is Tony Hawk’s Underground.
Tony Hawk’s Underground starts in good ol’ Shithole, New Jersey, where you play as a skater with huge ambitions to be a pro skater, not for money, not for fame, but for the...
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posted by Windwakerguy430


I like Bayonetta better than Devil May Cry… Fuck you, fight me. Let’s not waste another second and let’s talk about it.
Bayonetta follows, well, Bayonetta, an Umbra Witch who was sealed in a coffin five hundred years ago before she resurfaced, with no memory of her passed and a legion of Heaven’s angels hunting her down. So, with the help of bar tender and badass Rodin, scumbag Enzo, and totally not Yuri Lowenthal, Luca, she travels to a far off city in hopes of getting answers, while also killing as many angels as she can. So like I said before, Bayonetta is fucking awesome. You...
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So when it comes to talking about the best Zelda game out there, two of them usually come to mind. The majority think of Ocarina of Time, and while that is a usual pick, some would say that Link to the Past is the best. And while I like both games, but also like other Zelda games more, it’s clear which one I prefer over the two
Link to the Past follows, who else, Link, as he is called upon by Zelda to go on a quest to save Hyrule from being turned into the Dark World where Ganon rules, and must gain the help of the Seven Sages to do so. Being one of the few SNES games that I have played,...
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So Devil May Cry 3. Yeah, I bet you all were expecting it to be high on the list. After the disappointment that was 2, we needed a real good one. And a damn good one we got, so let's talk about it right no-

Smooth Criminal has already stolen this review



Today I'm taking over to review what is probably my favorite Devil May Cry game, Devil May Cry 3 Dante's Awakening.
For those not aware, Devil May Cry is a character action series developed by Capcom, created by the director of Resident Evil 2 and who would later go on to create the Bayonetta series, Hideki Kamiya. The original title,...
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posted by Windwakerguy430


Okay, I’m gonna stop talking about the stupid sock puppet, I swear to god… Okay, I lied, but not right now. So Tim Schaffer, a well respected game designer (At the time), who made may games like the Monkey Island franchise, Day of the Tentacle, and Grim Fandango. But it was clear he had the ambition to do more than just that. And more, he did do. An open world game with a-list actors and a huge soundtrack of licensed music. And that game was Brutal Legend.
The game follows Not-Jack Black, Eddie Riggs as he enters a mythical world of heavy metal torn by war, and now joins a resistance...
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So let’s talk about Grand Theft Auto… Okay, this is not gonna be easy to discuss. I never really enjoyed the gameplay of IV or even V. I think it was too real, if that makes any sense. It felt weighted down, and just kinda dull for me. I like the characters, I like the story, and I like the witty humor and satire of the modern world, but man, was the gameplay not doing it for me. But then I went back and tired out some older GTA games from the past, and yeah, this is definitely what I prefered. And let’s start with one of my favorites, Vice City.
The story is simple if you watched...
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In 2014, I decided to sink into many different fandoms that I thought were pretty neat at the time. I found myself in many of them

Anime



Creepypasta



And, as shameful as it is to admit, MLP



Each and every time, I crawled my way out and managed to find myself out of the cringe pit that was some of those things. It was a hard struggle to find my way out of the cancer, I was able to find the light of reality and bask in the sweet release. And while I don’t blame the creations themselves, I could never return to those things. I left, never to return to them, never to find myself...
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Well, looks like I'm late to the party again. After the latest Nintendo Direct that ended things off with an incredibly hype trailer for Smash 5, showing off Mario and Breath of the Wild Link staring down the Inklings from Splatoon, and with nothing else after that, it drove people insane. So, with Smash 5 coming out this year, we all know what our thoughts are. Who are they gonna bring into the game this time? When Brawl introduced Sonic, we all were kinda happy. Heck, despite how much our minds were blown that Snake was in Brawl, we could see it being possible. But with Smash 4 introducing...
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posted by Windwakerguy430
Hello, everyone, and welcome to another edition to Whatever Happened To... , where we look at gaming’s biggest flops, failures, and flub ups. And today, we’re all bitches! According to gaming’s biggest burnout, John Romero. And anyone who knows about worst games ever, knows exactly what we’re gonna be talking about. The N64 hype disaster, 2000s Daikatana.



Daikatana is an infamous game, for many reasons, and follows the story of feudal Japan in the future, rival clans, and the evil sword that is way lamer than Soul Edge, Daikatana. Before we talk about what a steaming pile of cow...
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Video games sure do have a lot of great female protagonists, don’t they? From the classic Jill Valentine to the fun Bayonetta, video games are more than capable than having female characters do just as much as males… But I’m tired of people praising great female protagonist. So let’s talk about some really bad ones. I’m talking about ones that are poorly written, make dumb decisions, and are just the worst kinds of characters around. Maybe one day, I’ll do a top five best female protagonists… One day. But today, let’s just talk about the bad ones. Before I continue, let’s...
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added by Seanthehedgehog
Muck helps Travis by causing an explosion.
video
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music
comedy
I have talked about The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker a lot on this website. I consider it to be my number one favorite game of all time, and I don't think that is ever going to change. I'm just so attached to this game, that I don't think I could feel attached to any other game the same way I am to Wind Waker. From the massive world that you can sail across and find little islands to explore, to the wonderful dungeons to come across, to having, arguably, the best Zelda, to the colorful and cartoon-like celshading, to the crazy and interesting characters. And speaking of characters, Link, in...
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Hello, everyone, and welcome to Nikpicks, where I talk about little tidbits of some of my favorite games out there, weather they be lore and stories of the world, little thoughts that run through my mind, or just things that I either really love or... for lack of a better word, dislike, little pieces of it. And what better way to start this new series off than with immediate negativity... Now you all know that this is clearly an article created by me. Now, before I get into the subject, let us discuss the game. Persona 3. Or rather, the FES version that I played. Now, Persona 3 is easily one...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Song: link

Tom Kenny: Sugar. Spice, and everything nice. These were the ingredients chosen to create the perfect little girls, but Professor Utonium accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction. Chemical X!
Professor: *Gets moved backwards by an explosion, but smiles when he sees what he created*
Tom Kenny: Thus the Powerpuff Girls were born! Using their ultra super powers, Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup have dedicated their lives to fighting crime, and the forces of evil.
Blossom: *Flies through the sky*
Bubbles: *Flying to the right of Blossom*
Buttercup: *Flying to the left...
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Oh, Sega. When will you ever care about other properties that aren’t Sonic already. Well, with a new Shenmue game being announced… Behind a wall of Sonic games, I think now is a good time to talk about a classic Sega game. And not just any Sega game, but a horror Sega game that fell into obscurity after some time ago. Yes, everyone. Today, we will be taking a look at the psychological horror game known as Condemned: Criminal Origins. Also, since this is an underrated game, I think that this will also be a Hidden Gems article. So, today, you will get both a Corner of Horror and a Hidden...
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