This is a poem I wrote today, 7 May 2008. Feedback/analysis is welcome.
********************
My eyes have been thirsting for you
These long lonely years
My ears have strained to hear your voice
The boy's enthusiasm for his lover
Has not sagged but rather swelled
With deprivation
Memory paints you
Perfect in wit, charm
Desire
Today I saw you briefly, from afar
I had to avert my eyes
Lest I be consumed
My ears heard your distant laughter
Through all the other noise
In that crowded place
I know that memory lies
But still I shivered
With longing and remorse
Today I also heard of the other man
Now in your life
Somewhere inside, a door slammed shut
A portcullis came crashing down
Putting an end to the questions
Could there be a place for us in our lives?
Might we ever talk again of big things and small
(Not wrapped in each other's arms, but still)?
Would I ever again hear stories about your cats,
Equal parts condescension and affection?
Would you want to talk? Could we be friends, or
Would you want to claw out my eyes?
The door slammed shut, and all I could feel
Was a tremendous, crushing weight
Miraculously lifted from my shoulders
Free - free at last!
********************
My eyes have been thirsting for you
These long lonely years
My ears have strained to hear your voice
The boy's enthusiasm for his lover
Has not sagged but rather swelled
With deprivation
Memory paints you
Perfect in wit, charm
Desire
Today I saw you briefly, from afar
I had to avert my eyes
Lest I be consumed
My ears heard your distant laughter
Through all the other noise
In that crowded place
I know that memory lies
But still I shivered
With longing and remorse
Today I also heard of the other man
Now in your life
Somewhere inside, a door slammed shut
A portcullis came crashing down
Putting an end to the questions
Could there be a place for us in our lives?
Might we ever talk again of big things and small
(Not wrapped in each other's arms, but still)?
Would I ever again hear stories about your cats,
Equal parts condescension and affection?
Would you want to talk? Could we be friends, or
Would you want to claw out my eyes?
The door slammed shut, and all I could feel
Was a tremendous, crushing weight
Miraculously lifted from my shoulders
Free - free at last!
Drip Drop, Drip Drop,
I can hear his tears Hitting the Floor,
A love that was once strong,
Has Fallen apart,Has been Ripped apart from its Core,
I knew this relationship wouldn't last long,
But for a moment, i thought that i still had love for him in store,
but i was wrong,Maybe im just somewhat of a hoare
i picked up his heart,and tore,
now hes suffering, he feels so torn,
now i dont know what to do,
is it time for us to go
Ive torn someone in two and dont know what to do
Would you know what to do,
would you know what to say,
would you know how hed feel,
would you see how hes sad,
would you understand his pain,
and let the tears rain,
does what you do fix things
or make them worse,
for the better or for the worst,
this love must have been cursed
I can hear his tears Hitting the Floor,
A love that was once strong,
Has Fallen apart,Has been Ripped apart from its Core,
I knew this relationship wouldn't last long,
But for a moment, i thought that i still had love for him in store,
but i was wrong,Maybe im just somewhat of a hoare
i picked up his heart,and tore,
now hes suffering, he feels so torn,
now i dont know what to do,
is it time for us to go
Ive torn someone in two and dont know what to do
Would you know what to do,
would you know what to say,
would you know how hed feel,
would you see how hes sad,
would you understand his pain,
and let the tears rain,
does what you do fix things
or make them worse,
for the better or for the worst,
this love must have been cursed
Quietly, he waits. She laughs. He feels no trace of doubt. At the strike of the clock, he shoots. She falls. Her blood blossoms on her forehead like a blood red rose. His revenge is complete. He stalks away....
Yes, I am insane.
What about you?
Yes, I'm insane.
Aren't you, too?
Yes, I have issues.
Don't you?
No, I'm not stupid.
Because, yes, you are, too.
No, I'm not an idiot.
Because that's who you are.
You are retarded.
I really hate you.
Yes, I'm insane.
And you are, too.
Yes, I am insane.
What about you?
Yes, I'm insane.
Aren't you, too?
Yes, I have issues.
Don't you?
No, I'm not stupid.
Because, yes, you are, too.
No, I'm not an idiot.
Because that's who you are.
You are retarded.
I really hate you.
Yes, I'm insane.
And you are, too.