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Newest Poem for my favorite artist <3 I love you Marshall!! Enjoy!!

Why are you mad?
Because I have a big mouth?
Don't like the back talk?
Can't stand the backlash?
Too bad!!
I'm gonna be crass!
Better put a visor on...
Because I'm gonna back-splash all over your ass!

Did you remember to bring a towel?
I wouldn't want you to get a rash.
I know I already done gave you whiplash, with all my back and forth.
Now be a good sport, shut your mouth!
I don't need any retort.
I get enough bullshit recourse from people's revenge.

I'm a smart ass you said?
What? You think that's gonna get to me?
Gonna get in my head?
Ha! Have you heard the new shit from Eminem?
Damn what an honor! And he's not even my baby's father (yet)....
It's like every single is about me and my plight with life!!
Fuck!! Makes me even hotter with wanting to be his wife!!!

I'm trying to contain myself, I mean, I'm not at all after his wealth.
I am more concerned with him staying in good health.
Because baby I'm in my prime at 35, I only have 5 left to shine while I ride....
Oh Marshall.... Shhhh....
There goes my big mouth again!
But hurry Eminem! Let's go to bed!!!
Give me a chance to repay your head game.

Ok... Sorry, I'm lame.
Really I'm a pretty awkward dame.
In a man's would just trying to stay sane, let alone sober...
which by the way, is the case.
Aside from the pills my Dr prescribed.

Don't worry love, I forgive you. I must!
I got so wet watching You-Tube.
I know I said I'd wait for you to view the new videos but...
I just couldn't hold it back anymore.
You'd think I'd be sore at some of the things you said to me!
Fuck it! I guess it makes for good TV.
Now get your ass here to meet me!

Really I just need a job.
Will you be the boss of me?
Oh Marshall, pretty please!
I'll even scrub toilets at one of your estates...
If it means having a position on my knees working for you!

Yes!! that's right baby I'll clean up the shit you spew!!
Until you're too old to chew.
But I get to insert the feeding tube. You boob!
God I'm so rude. Anywho....

About that job, I need a new passport like today.
Screw travel-slash-fuck buddy!
You're gonna have a travel bidet.
I'll provide the refreshing spray for your boo-tay!

You see, you see, you see!? How much I love you!
Fucking fool!
Although the aforementioned activities don't explain the drool.
Well some do. Jesus let me be your tool!
However those clips are not going on You-Tube.
You asshole! I hate you! I love you!
Do you find this funny? I do!

Ooooohhhhh!! I would give anything to say those 2 words to Eminem!
Well, I guess I just did but I demand that it include him, simultaneously, standing next to me!
Shit this is so funny! I can't believe I haven't peed!
Probably because I have to shit.
I'm holding it in because Marshall's in here again!
Look at what he makes me do with a pen!
Narcissistic bastard! It's all about him!

I wouldn't want it any other way though.
I mean how many people get so close they literally share an asshole?
I mean except maybe conjoined twins.
Oh God! Hold me down!
What I wouldn't give to be conjoined with Eminem!

I'm a pig!
Actually the Chinese say I'm a boar.
No, not whore! Just cause I write this way.
A boar like a wild pig...
and you better not be thinking I'm big!
Also not to be confused with a bore, you know like snore.
I'm anything but.

Oh yes let's talk about Marshall's butt some more.
It looks more tasty to me than s'mores!
And those are hot!
Somebody help me!
He's got me avatared again!
He's holding me hostage with a pen!
When I asked for a straight jacket!

You just wait Mr. Mathers until we're strapped up in that padded room.
It's no holds barred with hands behind our backs.
Marshall stop making me laugh...
And think about you in the sack!
I'm trying to show you more respect than that!
But oh yeah I'm the wacko!
You asshole!
Cum here!

I'm primed and ready to get all sweaty. You already experienced one of my workouts through Austin city!
Oh love we've made a name for ourselves all over town! Aren't you proud? You should hear me now! We're laughing so loud!

I bet you already know.
It's all part of the show!
Is it wireless and mobile?

What's that car doing behind me?
Checking out my scenery?
Baby! Aren't you gonna stand up for me?
Oh wait! Let's not go there again!
We have to start as friends!

Whatever nobody listens to me.
Marshall you better not deny me when asked by MTV!
You know you love me!
Asshole!
God! This shit is comedy gold!

Great I'll probably never get laid!
I'm posting this on your fan page!

Em! The car is still there! For real I swear!
Get out of me and come see!
By the way if I ever get laid, get out of me is a phrase you'll never hear me say!

Ok...ok... I'm trying to be proper and this poem has completely gone the right, I mean wrong way!

I swear I'm not just trying to get laid.
Maybe paid but for a legitimate job well done and I'd like an appropriate wage!
What do ya say Marsh?
What am I worth to ya!?

Truly yours, I'm you're biggest fan
This is Cheyanne ;)
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