Will: Hold on a second, Sue.
Sue: I resent being told to hold on to anything.
Will: My father always said you'd become a man when you bought your first house. I'm not sure what he meant though because he burned ours down during a drunken fight with mom.
Will: Being a boy band did wonders for my love life... we started doing it once a week.
Will [to April]: We'll get you sobered up... find you some underwear. It's not too late for you.
Terri: I'm the new school nurse.
Will: But you don't have any training.
Terri: Please, Will, it's a public school.
Principal Figgins: Let's hug it out.
Will: I'd rather...
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