Chapter 17: Why Does It Always Have To Be Him?
{Brad's POV}
No....God no....why? Why Randy, why now? This can't be happening. Not to him, not to our family. God please, don't do this....please! I never understood fully why people were religious, we went to church on holidays, but we weren't exactly religious. I never doubted you existed though. I never doubted you knew best. Until now that is. Why are you doing this to us? Why him, why does it always have to be him? Don't make me hate you God, don't take him from us. Not after we went through so much. Not after he suffered so much.
"Brad?" I glance down and see Randy looking up at me. His eyes tried and sad.
"Hey." I try and smile.
"I'm dying, aren't I." He knows, how did he know?
"Randy-"
"No, it's okay." He breaks in offering me a slight smile. "I'm not scared." My mind screams I'm scared. I'm more scared than I've ever been. Randy coughs then and draws my fully attention back to him.
"Your not scared?" Is the only thing I can say.
"No." He almost looks serene. I don't like this, not at all. I can't just sit by and watch my brother die. It can't work like that. This isn't fair, god please don't make him go! He looks so tired.
"Go back to sleep Randy." He smiles and obeys the request. I watch as he drops off almost immediately. Don't go Randy, please fight just a little longer, please. God, don't do this....please don't take him. Not now, damn it, not after so much. Mom and Dad left a little while ago, I think their in the waiting room, and as for Mark, well I don't know where he went. Mark has his own way of dealing with things and right now I guess he just needs to be alone. I myself could use some time alone, and stand, glancing back at Randy once before fleeing out the double doors.
*****
I round the corner, and find Mark facing the soda machine.
"Mark?"
"I can't be in there Brad....I just can't." His voice breaks and I move forward.
"I can't either." I say, by way of understanding. "This can't be happening."
"But it is." Mark replies turning to look at me. "He's going to die....wasn't this suppose to be treatable?"
"He woke up for a little bit." I tell him.
"Did you tell him?"
"He already knew. He woke up and said I'm dying, aren't I."
"This isn't fair."
"I know." He turns to me, his eyes bright with anger and tears.
"This wasn't suppose to happen! He was suppose to be okay! He was suppose to be stronger because of this experience, he was suppose to live!" Mark's voice breaks off and he stares at me.
"Mark..."
"It shouldn't have to be Randy." He turns his back on me then, to try and shield his tears I imagine. Quickly I step forward and put my hand on his shoulder.
"Mark, I know how you feel. Really I do." He's quiet before he suddenly turns to look at me.
"How is he taking it?" I bite my lip
"He says he's not scared."
"I'm scared." Mark says softly.
"I am too." I admit. Mark wipes a shaking hand across his eyes and sets his gaze on me once more.
"I don't understand why it has to be our family. What did we do to deserve this?" He asks softly.
"Mark....sometimes these things just happen."
"But why?"
"I don't know....sometimes people just die."
"Why Randy? Why our brother?"
"I can't answer that for you, I don't know." Mark stared at me for a moment.
"Wasn't he suppose to get a happy ending?"
End of Ch17
{Brad's POV}
No....God no....why? Why Randy, why now? This can't be happening. Not to him, not to our family. God please, don't do this....please! I never understood fully why people were religious, we went to church on holidays, but we weren't exactly religious. I never doubted you existed though. I never doubted you knew best. Until now that is. Why are you doing this to us? Why him, why does it always have to be him? Don't make me hate you God, don't take him from us. Not after we went through so much. Not after he suffered so much.
"Brad?" I glance down and see Randy looking up at me. His eyes tried and sad.
"Hey." I try and smile.
"I'm dying, aren't I." He knows, how did he know?
"Randy-"
"No, it's okay." He breaks in offering me a slight smile. "I'm not scared." My mind screams I'm scared. I'm more scared than I've ever been. Randy coughs then and draws my fully attention back to him.
"Your not scared?" Is the only thing I can say.
"No." He almost looks serene. I don't like this, not at all. I can't just sit by and watch my brother die. It can't work like that. This isn't fair, god please don't make him go! He looks so tired.
"Go back to sleep Randy." He smiles and obeys the request. I watch as he drops off almost immediately. Don't go Randy, please fight just a little longer, please. God, don't do this....please don't take him. Not now, damn it, not after so much. Mom and Dad left a little while ago, I think their in the waiting room, and as for Mark, well I don't know where he went. Mark has his own way of dealing with things and right now I guess he just needs to be alone. I myself could use some time alone, and stand, glancing back at Randy once before fleeing out the double doors.
*****
I round the corner, and find Mark facing the soda machine.
"Mark?"
"I can't be in there Brad....I just can't." His voice breaks and I move forward.
"I can't either." I say, by way of understanding. "This can't be happening."
"But it is." Mark replies turning to look at me. "He's going to die....wasn't this suppose to be treatable?"
"He woke up for a little bit." I tell him.
"Did you tell him?"
"He already knew. He woke up and said I'm dying, aren't I."
"This isn't fair."
"I know." He turns to me, his eyes bright with anger and tears.
"This wasn't suppose to happen! He was suppose to be okay! He was suppose to be stronger because of this experience, he was suppose to live!" Mark's voice breaks off and he stares at me.
"Mark..."
"It shouldn't have to be Randy." He turns his back on me then, to try and shield his tears I imagine. Quickly I step forward and put my hand on his shoulder.
"Mark, I know how you feel. Really I do." He's quiet before he suddenly turns to look at me.
"How is he taking it?" I bite my lip
"He says he's not scared."
"I'm scared." Mark says softly.
"I am too." I admit. Mark wipes a shaking hand across his eyes and sets his gaze on me once more.
"I don't understand why it has to be our family. What did we do to deserve this?" He asks softly.
"Mark....sometimes these things just happen."
"But why?"
"I don't know....sometimes people just die."
"Why Randy? Why our brother?"
"I can't answer that for you, I don't know." Mark stared at me for a moment.
"Wasn't he suppose to get a happy ending?"
End of Ch17
