Chapter 37: Sacrifices of the Heart (Jacob’s POV)
“Renesmee!” I tried to break free of the power that the little Volturi vampire had over me but it was no use. I watched in horror as Seth lay crumpled on the ground, and Renesmee and Amore were out of my reach. I closed my eyes and in my mind I shouted, “Edward where the hell are you!” I wished that I was in wolf form so that I could call for Leah and Sam’s pack. Yet part of me was secretly glad that I couldn’t involve them, it would have been a senseless massacre. We couldn’t beat them alone not with Jane and Alec’s powers. I watched in disbelief as Amore sped off with the two massive cloaked figures and Alec in hot pursuit. Something inside Nessie snapped and she walked towards Jane shaking in anger. “I told you to leave my friends alone.” Jane didn’t even look threatened she smiled smugly and within seconds Nessie was on the ground at her feet writhing in pain. I growled fiercely and wished I was free so that I could rip the little vampire’s head off. I would never forgive myself for this. Renesmee screamed in pain and anger, she shrieked for me to help her; and I couldn’t. It was the worst sound that I had ever heard. Moments later Alec and the two other vampires returned carrying a struggling Amore. They were struggling to hold onto her, she was so strong…but not strong enough given the two monstrous vampires who held her plus the powers of Jane and Alec. Something was wrong with her she swung blindly. It was as if she couldn’t see. Alec stormed up to Jane, “What are you doing to Renesmee? We had specific orders.” Jane rolled her eyes and looked at her nails in boredom, “She is perfectly fine Alec, I was just having a little fun.” Alec shook his head, “Enough.” Jane sighed in disappointment and released her hold on Renesmee. I was thankful for that, but the relief was short lived. Jane let up her invisible torture on Nahuel and Alec grabbed him, and brought him over to Renesmee and Amore. Renesmee growled, “Let Jacob go!” Alec looked at her, “My aren’t we being difficult, I though that you had realized by this point we are the ones calling the shots.” His eyes narrowed as he stared at all three of them. Their eyes became bright red and Nessie stopped arguing, Amore stopped struggling. “We will be on our way now,” Jane instructed. “Yes master,” Nahuel, Renesmee and Amore echoed at the same time. Thy disappeared into the night, I was finally able to stand up just as I was about to tear after them I felt a hand on my shoulder I jumped and growled ready to kill somebody. “Jacob, it’s me.” I looked into Edward’s eyes they flashed with hatred and grief. Seconds later, I was surrounded by every member of the Cullen family, Leah, and Sam and his pack. I spoke, my voce shaking, “It was the Volturi all along, Renesmee was right.” My voice broke and Edward put his hand on my shoulder, “I know, Jacob, its ok. I heard the whole thing.” I turned to him fiercely, “Where were you? I was calling for you.” He looked down grief-stricken. “We were all the way past Seattle, we came as fast as we could.” I kind of felt bad for him but I was still pissed. “Well it’s a little late isn’t it?” I said coldly. He looked at me his eyes empty he didn’t contest me. “I am sorry that I let you all down.” He said quietly. Bella and Alice came up to us, “Edward, Alice saw it. We were too late.” She sobbed, “My baby…” He took her in his arms. I looked over and saw Rosalie sobbing into Emmett who had never looked more furious than he did now. Leah wailed, “Nooooo” in terror as she saw her brother for the first time, “Seth!” she screamed as she ran to his side. I looked around wildly as I shouted out orders and explained to those who didn’t already know what had transpired. I turned to Sam, “keep your pack on patrol around the boundary line in case they come back or change plans.” I turned back to Leah and the Cullen’s, “Take care of Seth get him back to the house so that Carlisle can look at him, he was hurt badly. Nahuel did this, he is the one who attacked Sienna and changed her. The Volturi have him under their control, I will explain more after, I have to go after her. I ran into the woods and phased so that I could stay on their trail. I heard footsteps coming towards me from my side I froze and hunched down so that I would be ready to attack, growling. Edward, Emmett and Alice came tearing through the woods. “Jacob, come back to the house, we aren’t going to find them here they are long gone.” Edward said his voice breaking. I looked at him doubtfully. Alice spoke up, “Seriously Jake, I just saw them boarding the plane.” I grudgingly went along with him. I phased back and followed after them. As soon as I got into the house I noticed that everyone was upstairs in the hall waiting to hear what was going on with Seth. I walked into Carlisle’s study and saw him taping Seth’s ribs. He looked up, ‘He will be alright Jake, he has a concussion and some broken ribs, but he will be fine. Seth opened his eyes and looked around. I walked p to him, “Seth, are you alright” He looked at me frantically, “Where is Amore?” I looked down, “they have her and Nessie they are taking them to Volterra.” Carlisle’s head snapped up, I had never seen him angry before but his eyes had turned the color of molten lava, “Jake you need to tell us everything, we all need to know the details so that we can formulate a plan.” I helped Seth down from the table and we all filed downstairs. Everyone sat watching me, I tried not to look at Bella she was hunched over against Edward and looked catatonic, and it was heartbreaking. “Nahuel came up to us and wanted to warn us that the Volturi were after Renesmee and Amore.” Alice who had been staring off in a daze spoke up, “They originally only wanted Renesmee but they saw Amore tonight and Aro became interested in her because she is a Cullen newborn. He fully expected her to have gifts.” I waited until she was finished and then I continued with my story, “The Volturi forced Nahuel to work for them. They have his family and threatened to kill them if he didn’t kidnap Renesmee and now Amore as well, and bring them back to them. He tried to warn us, he claimed that he didn’t hurt Sienna on purpose.” Emmett snorted, and Carlisle looked at him gravely, “Emmett I believe him, Alec is able to control people.” I kept going ignoring the interruptions, “Seth snapped and attacked him. Nahuel didn’t even fight back. As Nahuel and Seth were fighting Jane and Alec appeared with members of their guard. After he was under Alec’s control, Nahuel became very violent and hurt Seth. Then Jane used some kind of power over me, I couldn’t move…” I stopped talking as my voice gave out at the memory. I leaned against the wall squeezing my eyes shut willing the memory of Renesmee screaming for me help her and me not being able to do anything to fade away, but of course it didn’t. I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up to see Edward his eyes pained with the memory that he had overhead in my mind. “You did what you could, Jake thank you. We will go and get her don’t worry.” I turned to him, “I am coming with you.” He looked at me and shook his head sadly, “Jacob, you can’t do that.” “Like hell I can’t,” I snarled. Carlisle walked up to me and looked at me solemnly, “Jacob I appreciate everything that you have done for my granddaughters, but you are going to have to let us handle this. You can’t set foot in Volterra; Caius will have you killed on the spot. He has tried to wipe out your kind for centuries.” I looked at him with determination set in my face, “Carlisle there has to be a way. I would rather die than know that I didn’t do everything I could to save her, I failed her.” He shook his head, “Jacob, only humans and vampires can walk the streets of Volterra.” I thought it through for a split second. That is all it took for me to realize what I needed to do to save Renesmee. I had to walk away from everything that I believed in, everything that my life stood for. I had no choice; as my life would be meaningless without her. I looked at him solemnly, “Then change me. NOW.” The room fell silent Bella snapped out of her catatonic reverie, “Jake!” she gasped. Carlisle looked at me; his lips were pressed together tightly. “Jacob, I can’t do that.” I growled, “Why not?” He paced the floor, “Jacob if you are truly a werewolf, the venom alone will kill you it is poisonous to werewolves.” I thought for a moment, “Didn’t you tell me that you thought that we were shape shifters? The fact that we shift into wolves was purely coincidental, you said that it could have been any other animal. If that’s the case then we don’t fall into the werewolf category.” He thought for a moment, and scratched his chin, “There is a possibility. It is a chance I am not willing to take, though. There is at least a 50% chance
that you will die.” I walked up to him and looked at him gravely, “Carlisle, if I don’t try to save her and something happens to her there is a 100% chance that I will die. What are the odds you would prefer to work with?” Bella walked up to me slowly her eyes wide, “Jake you cannot do this,” I looked at her sadly, “Bells I promised you and Edward I would keep her safe and I let you all down. I love her more than life itself. Nothing makes sense for me if she isn’t here. I am doing this and that’s final.” She looked into my eyes for what seemed like an eternity, it seemed as though she actually understood what I was feeling. She swallowed and then her look of refusal turned to one of acquiescence as she said timidly, “If that is what you want, I will change you myself.” Carlisle closed his eyes, “I don’t think it’s…” she looked at him austerely, “Carlisle, I can do this, I owe Jacob.” She started to lead me upstairs when Seth hobbled to his feet, “I’m going too.” I looked at him and shook my head. Seth was a little brother to me, I wouldn’t allow this. “No Seth. I cannot lead you into something that I am not sure of. I can’t have it on my conscience that I may be leading you to your death. Besides you aren’t in good shape right now. ” He winced in pain, “I will be fine in a couple of hours, plus the venom will heal it,” Esme helped him to sit down. I shook my head resolutely; the answer is no. hat is a command.” I growled using my Alpha power over him for the first time that I can remember. My tone softened and I place my hand on his shoulder, “It will be alright, I will bring Amore home to you.” I turned to walk away and Leah grabbed my hand, I looked at her, tears were streaming down her face, she opened her mouth to say something and I closed my eyes, “Leah please don’t…” She ignored me, “Jake, I don’t like it but I understand. Please be careful.” I hugged her, “If this doesn’t go right look after your brother for me, ok?” She nodded as the tears continued to fall. Edward was waiting at the foot of the stairs. I couldn’t describe the look on his face I hadn’t seen him look this disturbed since Bella’s pregnancy. He came up to me and put his arms around me, “I know I can’t stop you. No one would have stopped me from fighting for Bella no matter the cost. Good luck, my son. Thank you.” I looked into his eyes as I said firmly, “when I bring her home, I am going to marry her.” He looked at me and a tiny smile played at corners of his lips and he nodded, “there is no one else that we would want her with.” He turned away from me and Bella started to lead me up the stairs as Carlisle followed us.
When we entered Carlisle’s study, he looked at me doubtfully, “Are you sure about this Jacob?” I nodded and he gestured towards the table. I sat down, and Bella sat quietly on the side. “Carlisle can you give us a moment?” she asked in her velvety voice. He nodded and stepped out of the room closing the door behind him. She turned to me and smiled sadly, “Jake…” her voice faltered. I reached for her hand, “it’s going to be fine, I will be fine we will get her back I promise.” She squeezed her eyes shut and looked down, “I just can’t help but wonder if your life would have been better if I wouldn’t have involved you in all of this.” I looked at her seriously, “Bella you are my best friend, if it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t have met the love of my life. I owe you. I will bring her home to you, I promise.” She looked at me her eyes were dull; “Jake I have put you through so much over the years. I will never forgive myself if I kill you.” I held her hand tighter, “Bells, you are saving me by doing this. If I don’t have a chance to go save her I am as good as dead anyway.” She smiled at me, “Renesmee is a lucky girl; she loves you so much. If she new that you were doing this…” her voice broke, “Jake she wouldn’t want you to do this…” I sat up and looked at her firmly, “Bella this is no longer up for discussion; we are running out of time. Do it or I will find someone else,” I smiled wickedly, “I’m sure Blondie wouldn’t mind.” She laughed and smacked my arm. She gave me one more serious look and hugged me, “I love you Jake, thank you for always protecting my daughter thank you for everything you have ever done for me…” I laid myself back down and as she leaned over to do the job my mind raced. I thought back to when I first saw Bella and how I thought that she was the one…if only I knew how things would turn out. Then again I probably wouldn’t have believed it. My thoughts returned to Renesmee, and then I felt a sharp pain in my neck that began to burn. Gradually my entire body was on fire. I had never felt anything so painful it was as if she had injected acid into me. Jane’s powers over me were a nothing in comparison. As the venom coursed through my veins I forced myself to focus on Renesmee, her beautiful eyes, her voice. I forbade myself to remember when she was stolen from me and to torture myself with the fact that I couldn’t do anything about it. Through the pain I heard Carlisle speaking firmly, “Bella, STOP, that’s enough.” My eyes stayed open long enough to see her step back with a horrified look on her face, and then everything went black.
“Renesmee!” I tried to break free of the power that the little Volturi vampire had over me but it was no use. I watched in horror as Seth lay crumpled on the ground, and Renesmee and Amore were out of my reach. I closed my eyes and in my mind I shouted, “Edward where the hell are you!” I wished that I was in wolf form so that I could call for Leah and Sam’s pack. Yet part of me was secretly glad that I couldn’t involve them, it would have been a senseless massacre. We couldn’t beat them alone not with Jane and Alec’s powers. I watched in disbelief as Amore sped off with the two massive cloaked figures and Alec in hot pursuit. Something inside Nessie snapped and she walked towards Jane shaking in anger. “I told you to leave my friends alone.” Jane didn’t even look threatened she smiled smugly and within seconds Nessie was on the ground at her feet writhing in pain. I growled fiercely and wished I was free so that I could rip the little vampire’s head off. I would never forgive myself for this. Renesmee screamed in pain and anger, she shrieked for me to help her; and I couldn’t. It was the worst sound that I had ever heard. Moments later Alec and the two other vampires returned carrying a struggling Amore. They were struggling to hold onto her, she was so strong…but not strong enough given the two monstrous vampires who held her plus the powers of Jane and Alec. Something was wrong with her she swung blindly. It was as if she couldn’t see. Alec stormed up to Jane, “What are you doing to Renesmee? We had specific orders.” Jane rolled her eyes and looked at her nails in boredom, “She is perfectly fine Alec, I was just having a little fun.” Alec shook his head, “Enough.” Jane sighed in disappointment and released her hold on Renesmee. I was thankful for that, but the relief was short lived. Jane let up her invisible torture on Nahuel and Alec grabbed him, and brought him over to Renesmee and Amore. Renesmee growled, “Let Jacob go!” Alec looked at her, “My aren’t we being difficult, I though that you had realized by this point we are the ones calling the shots.” His eyes narrowed as he stared at all three of them. Their eyes became bright red and Nessie stopped arguing, Amore stopped struggling. “We will be on our way now,” Jane instructed. “Yes master,” Nahuel, Renesmee and Amore echoed at the same time. Thy disappeared into the night, I was finally able to stand up just as I was about to tear after them I felt a hand on my shoulder I jumped and growled ready to kill somebody. “Jacob, it’s me.” I looked into Edward’s eyes they flashed with hatred and grief. Seconds later, I was surrounded by every member of the Cullen family, Leah, and Sam and his pack. I spoke, my voce shaking, “It was the Volturi all along, Renesmee was right.” My voice broke and Edward put his hand on my shoulder, “I know, Jacob, its ok. I heard the whole thing.” I turned to him fiercely, “Where were you? I was calling for you.” He looked down grief-stricken. “We were all the way past Seattle, we came as fast as we could.” I kind of felt bad for him but I was still pissed. “Well it’s a little late isn’t it?” I said coldly. He looked at me his eyes empty he didn’t contest me. “I am sorry that I let you all down.” He said quietly. Bella and Alice came up to us, “Edward, Alice saw it. We were too late.” She sobbed, “My baby…” He took her in his arms. I looked over and saw Rosalie sobbing into Emmett who had never looked more furious than he did now. Leah wailed, “Nooooo” in terror as she saw her brother for the first time, “Seth!” she screamed as she ran to his side. I looked around wildly as I shouted out orders and explained to those who didn’t already know what had transpired. I turned to Sam, “keep your pack on patrol around the boundary line in case they come back or change plans.” I turned back to Leah and the Cullen’s, “Take care of Seth get him back to the house so that Carlisle can look at him, he was hurt badly. Nahuel did this, he is the one who attacked Sienna and changed her. The Volturi have him under their control, I will explain more after, I have to go after her. I ran into the woods and phased so that I could stay on their trail. I heard footsteps coming towards me from my side I froze and hunched down so that I would be ready to attack, growling. Edward, Emmett and Alice came tearing through the woods. “Jacob, come back to the house, we aren’t going to find them here they are long gone.” Edward said his voice breaking. I looked at him doubtfully. Alice spoke up, “Seriously Jake, I just saw them boarding the plane.” I grudgingly went along with him. I phased back and followed after them. As soon as I got into the house I noticed that everyone was upstairs in the hall waiting to hear what was going on with Seth. I walked into Carlisle’s study and saw him taping Seth’s ribs. He looked up, ‘He will be alright Jake, he has a concussion and some broken ribs, but he will be fine. Seth opened his eyes and looked around. I walked p to him, “Seth, are you alright” He looked at me frantically, “Where is Amore?” I looked down, “they have her and Nessie they are taking them to Volterra.” Carlisle’s head snapped up, I had never seen him angry before but his eyes had turned the color of molten lava, “Jake you need to tell us everything, we all need to know the details so that we can formulate a plan.” I helped Seth down from the table and we all filed downstairs. Everyone sat watching me, I tried not to look at Bella she was hunched over against Edward and looked catatonic, and it was heartbreaking. “Nahuel came up to us and wanted to warn us that the Volturi were after Renesmee and Amore.” Alice who had been staring off in a daze spoke up, “They originally only wanted Renesmee but they saw Amore tonight and Aro became interested in her because she is a Cullen newborn. He fully expected her to have gifts.” I waited until she was finished and then I continued with my story, “The Volturi forced Nahuel to work for them. They have his family and threatened to kill them if he didn’t kidnap Renesmee and now Amore as well, and bring them back to them. He tried to warn us, he claimed that he didn’t hurt Sienna on purpose.” Emmett snorted, and Carlisle looked at him gravely, “Emmett I believe him, Alec is able to control people.” I kept going ignoring the interruptions, “Seth snapped and attacked him. Nahuel didn’t even fight back. As Nahuel and Seth were fighting Jane and Alec appeared with members of their guard. After he was under Alec’s control, Nahuel became very violent and hurt Seth. Then Jane used some kind of power over me, I couldn’t move…” I stopped talking as my voice gave out at the memory. I leaned against the wall squeezing my eyes shut willing the memory of Renesmee screaming for me help her and me not being able to do anything to fade away, but of course it didn’t. I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up to see Edward his eyes pained with the memory that he had overhead in my mind. “You did what you could, Jake thank you. We will go and get her don’t worry.” I turned to him, “I am coming with you.” He looked at me and shook his head sadly, “Jacob, you can’t do that.” “Like hell I can’t,” I snarled. Carlisle walked up to me and looked at me solemnly, “Jacob I appreciate everything that you have done for my granddaughters, but you are going to have to let us handle this. You can’t set foot in Volterra; Caius will have you killed on the spot. He has tried to wipe out your kind for centuries.” I looked at him with determination set in my face, “Carlisle there has to be a way. I would rather die than know that I didn’t do everything I could to save her, I failed her.” He shook his head, “Jacob, only humans and vampires can walk the streets of Volterra.” I thought it through for a split second. That is all it took for me to realize what I needed to do to save Renesmee. I had to walk away from everything that I believed in, everything that my life stood for. I had no choice; as my life would be meaningless without her. I looked at him solemnly, “Then change me. NOW.” The room fell silent Bella snapped out of her catatonic reverie, “Jake!” she gasped. Carlisle looked at me; his lips were pressed together tightly. “Jacob, I can’t do that.” I growled, “Why not?” He paced the floor, “Jacob if you are truly a werewolf, the venom alone will kill you it is poisonous to werewolves.” I thought for a moment, “Didn’t you tell me that you thought that we were shape shifters? The fact that we shift into wolves was purely coincidental, you said that it could have been any other animal. If that’s the case then we don’t fall into the werewolf category.” He thought for a moment, and scratched his chin, “There is a possibility. It is a chance I am not willing to take, though. There is at least a 50% chance
that you will die.” I walked up to him and looked at him gravely, “Carlisle, if I don’t try to save her and something happens to her there is a 100% chance that I will die. What are the odds you would prefer to work with?” Bella walked up to me slowly her eyes wide, “Jake you cannot do this,” I looked at her sadly, “Bells I promised you and Edward I would keep her safe and I let you all down. I love her more than life itself. Nothing makes sense for me if she isn’t here. I am doing this and that’s final.” She looked into my eyes for what seemed like an eternity, it seemed as though she actually understood what I was feeling. She swallowed and then her look of refusal turned to one of acquiescence as she said timidly, “If that is what you want, I will change you myself.” Carlisle closed his eyes, “I don’t think it’s…” she looked at him austerely, “Carlisle, I can do this, I owe Jacob.” She started to lead me upstairs when Seth hobbled to his feet, “I’m going too.” I looked at him and shook my head. Seth was a little brother to me, I wouldn’t allow this. “No Seth. I cannot lead you into something that I am not sure of. I can’t have it on my conscience that I may be leading you to your death. Besides you aren’t in good shape right now. ” He winced in pain, “I will be fine in a couple of hours, plus the venom will heal it,” Esme helped him to sit down. I shook my head resolutely; the answer is no. hat is a command.” I growled using my Alpha power over him for the first time that I can remember. My tone softened and I place my hand on his shoulder, “It will be alright, I will bring Amore home to you.” I turned to walk away and Leah grabbed my hand, I looked at her, tears were streaming down her face, she opened her mouth to say something and I closed my eyes, “Leah please don’t…” She ignored me, “Jake, I don’t like it but I understand. Please be careful.” I hugged her, “If this doesn’t go right look after your brother for me, ok?” She nodded as the tears continued to fall. Edward was waiting at the foot of the stairs. I couldn’t describe the look on his face I hadn’t seen him look this disturbed since Bella’s pregnancy. He came up to me and put his arms around me, “I know I can’t stop you. No one would have stopped me from fighting for Bella no matter the cost. Good luck, my son. Thank you.” I looked into his eyes as I said firmly, “when I bring her home, I am going to marry her.” He looked at me and a tiny smile played at corners of his lips and he nodded, “there is no one else that we would want her with.” He turned away from me and Bella started to lead me up the stairs as Carlisle followed us.
When we entered Carlisle’s study, he looked at me doubtfully, “Are you sure about this Jacob?” I nodded and he gestured towards the table. I sat down, and Bella sat quietly on the side. “Carlisle can you give us a moment?” she asked in her velvety voice. He nodded and stepped out of the room closing the door behind him. She turned to me and smiled sadly, “Jake…” her voice faltered. I reached for her hand, “it’s going to be fine, I will be fine we will get her back I promise.” She squeezed her eyes shut and looked down, “I just can’t help but wonder if your life would have been better if I wouldn’t have involved you in all of this.” I looked at her seriously, “Bella you are my best friend, if it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t have met the love of my life. I owe you. I will bring her home to you, I promise.” She looked at me her eyes were dull; “Jake I have put you through so much over the years. I will never forgive myself if I kill you.” I held her hand tighter, “Bells, you are saving me by doing this. If I don’t have a chance to go save her I am as good as dead anyway.” She smiled at me, “Renesmee is a lucky girl; she loves you so much. If she new that you were doing this…” her voice broke, “Jake she wouldn’t want you to do this…” I sat up and looked at her firmly, “Bella this is no longer up for discussion; we are running out of time. Do it or I will find someone else,” I smiled wickedly, “I’m sure Blondie wouldn’t mind.” She laughed and smacked my arm. She gave me one more serious look and hugged me, “I love you Jake, thank you for always protecting my daughter thank you for everything you have ever done for me…” I laid myself back down and as she leaned over to do the job my mind raced. I thought back to when I first saw Bella and how I thought that she was the one…if only I knew how things would turn out. Then again I probably wouldn’t have believed it. My thoughts returned to Renesmee, and then I felt a sharp pain in my neck that began to burn. Gradually my entire body was on fire. I had never felt anything so painful it was as if she had injected acid into me. Jane’s powers over me were a nothing in comparison. As the venom coursed through my veins I forced myself to focus on Renesmee, her beautiful eyes, her voice. I forbade myself to remember when she was stolen from me and to torture myself with the fact that I couldn’t do anything about it. Through the pain I heard Carlisle speaking firmly, “Bella, STOP, that’s enough.” My eyes stayed open long enough to see her step back with a horrified look on her face, and then everything went black.
