Disclaimer: I don’t own the characters, but you all know that by now. But I don’t want to get in any trouble so there. :0)
A/N: If you like the chapter please tell me. It is so nice to hear. I know that it has been a very long time since I got this chapter up, but please let me know if you like this or not. I really am having a difficult time with things lately and need the encouragement.
Chapter 17
“I’ll do it,” Edward said. Did I hear that right? Edward was going to change me? I was going to belong to him. “And I wanted you to know that you are going to take the last remaining part of me that feels human, but I don’t want anyone else to do this to you. I just hope that I am strong enough to not kill you, Bella.”
“You won’t hurt her. You will find the strength to stop. I know that you don’t believe that Edward, but it is true,” Carlisle said.
I don’t think I took a breath at all. I couldn’t take my eyes off of him and before I knew what I was doing I launched myself into his arms and kissed him passionately. I didn’t even think about Esme or Carlisle being right there next to me. But Edward wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me closer to him. He deepened the kiss by tilting my head back ever so gently. His hands were in my hair and a soft sigh escaped my lips. But my lips weren’t idle for long and his found mine again. Before I knew it, he lifted me up in his arms and carried me outside.
I hadn’t known that Esme and Carlisle left before Edward picked me up but when I looked back into the house they were gone. I looked back up at Edward and I had my arms wrapped around his neck. He looked back at me and smiled. By now it was dark out and the stars were out and shining brightly. He looked spectacular in the moonlight, like a marble statue of a god, only much better. How did I luck out to be with him?
He set me on the ground in Esme’s garden and eased himself next to me. He leaned back on his elbows and gestured for me to lean against him. I did and looked upon the stars. Were my parents able to see me right now? Were they able to see how happy I was in this very moment? I just realized that I hadn’t said anything to Edward since he said that he would take away my mortality.
“Edward, I-“
“Sh, don’t say anything. I know,” he said. He just pressed my head against his stone chest and I relaxed into him. We sat there staring into the stars as if they had some kind of meaning to us. I don’t know if they did or not. I don’t know how long we sat there not talking but soon we heard a noise in the trees just to the right of us. I tensed and looked to Edward. He didn’t really react, only looked in the general direction of the disturbance.
Out from the trees popped Rosalie and Emmett, no wonder Edward didn’t react. “Hey, you two. What are you doing out here?” asked Emmett. With that he pounced at Edward and gave him a quick jab to the arm. Rosalie just rolled her eyes and shook her head.
“Boys,” she said, looking to me to see if I agreed. I just smiled at her as Edward hugged me closer.
“Hey Emmett, Rosalie. We are just watching the night go by,” I said. I looked back to Edward and realized that he wasn’t watching Emmett or Rosalie, just looking at me. I blushed and looked back down.
“Awe, Edward, stop embarrassing her. That’s not nice,” Rosalie said, teasing him.
“Oh let him. I like the way she blushes,” Emmett said. Rosalie jabbed him in the ribs and he laughed. “Sorry Bella, but we can’t do that and I happen to think it is endearing. No matter what Rosalie says.”
“It’s okay Rosalie. I know that he is teasing me. I can handle it.” I laughed and Edward gave a small chuckle.
“You never cease to amaze me at all that you tolerate Bella,” Edward said. “We do need to have time to talk, but right now is not the time.” I just nodded. I was scared of what he was going to say to me and what that was going to do to me emotionally.
“Well, Rose, honey let’s leave the two lovebirds together,” Emmett, said with a smile. “But don’t keep her out too much longer Edward, she is going to get cold soon.”
“Yes father,” Edward replied with a scowl.
Emmett and Rosalie went into the house arm and arm without looking back at us. I felt Edward relax a bit after they left. I looked at him trying to read his face. It didn’t work.
“Edward? Are you okay?” I asked him timidly. I don’t know why I was scared to ask him how he was. I didn’t want to hear that I hurt him by asking to be changed. I feel that I was asking something of him that was the worst thing possible.
“Bella,” he said slowly. “I don’t know how to really react to this. Everything is happening really fast here with you. I don’t feel like you’ve had time to adjust to losing your parents, having Holly come into the picture, and now you wanting to become a monster.”
“I would not become a monster. You and your family are not monsters. How can you think that, Edward?”
“We are the perfect predators Bella. We don’t need any help to kill but we have every quality that humans like and are drawn to. Just look at you. You are sitting here with me in the open with no one here to protect and I could kill you in a heartbeat. You wouldn’t even know that you were dying.”
I sat there and let everything he just said soak in. I didn’t feel the same way he did and I don’t know if I ever would. I didn’t see the monster that he was describing. Maybe I was just grasping at life and what possibilities there were for me. I only saw that I would die if it was up to Holly and it would happen too easily. The Cullen’s couldn’t be with me all of the time. Sooner or later somehow something would get messed up and I would be alone and then she would have her opportunity. I didn’t want to put any of them at risk either. This was the only option that seemed like it would work.
I had no other family left. I only had the people that were in this house right now. They were the only family I had and the only people that matter to me now. I had to let Edward know that. Right now I wished that he would be able to see into my thoughts and see that this change will really be for the best. We only had such a small window left and we needed to make the move soon.
“Edward, I don’t see you or your family as monsters. You are all very caring and you love each other very much. And I wish that I didn’t have to put your family at risk.” I held up my hand since he started to interrupt me. “And I am going to do everything that I can to help you out. I know what I am asking is big and I know you don’t like it, but I am happy that you are going to be the one to change me. I will feel like I… um… I will feel like I belong to you.” I looked down.
He put his hand under my chin and lifted my face up so he could look into my eyes. He studied them for what seemed like forever and I felt myself getting redder as he stared. “Are you completely sure about this Bella? Do you really want this?”
“Edward, I want you and only you for the rest of eternity. And to be with your family too. I am more sure of this than I am about anything I’ve ever decided. Yes, I want to do this.” At this point I shivered without wanting to. Aside from the night turning colder, Edward was cold too, which made it worse.
“Come on. Let’s get you inside. I’ll make you a fire; get you warmed up.” He practically lifted me up without any help from me. We went into the house. I didn’t let go of him. I was sure of what I was doing but I felt the need to hang onto reality. Everything was going by fast just like Edward said. But I didn’t care anymore. I knew what I wanted.
We walked in and Edward went to the fireplace in the living room and started a fire right away. He looked back at me and shook his head. “What are we going to do with you Bella?” I laughed a small laugh and sat in front of the fireplace. Edward stood for a moment longer then he joined me on the floor.
“So. What’s the plan? How is this change going to happen? I’m sorry for bringing it up again but I just have to know what I am going to have happen.” I noticed that his eyes closed briefly and that his shoulders slumped a little with me asking.
“The plan. I guess the plan for right now is to bring you to Isle Esme and the change will take place there. Are you sure that this is what you really want to do Bella?”
“I am completely sure Edward. I don’t ever want to lose you or any of your family. I have nowhere else to go. I have nothing else to look forward to and nothing that I could ever want more in my life. As long as I have you, I will be where I need to be.”
With a sigh he replied, “Okay Bella. We will leave in a little bit. Just let me go hunting first. I don’t want to go overboard and kill you.”
I laughed at him but said, “Okay. I will wait here.” He got up without me seeing him and was gone before I could blink. A few breaths later Alice walked in the room. She must have known that Edward was gone, tricky little vampire.
“Bella, how are you doing? Getting nervous yet?” She sat down in the same spot that Edward just vacated next to me.
I shook my head. “Not yet. But I am sure that when Edward gets back and he and I start to leave that I will be.”
Alice smiled at me and wrapped her arms around my shoulders. “You are going to be fine, you know? I don’t see anything bad happening to you. I’ve been watching out for any changes, any negative changes, and I don’t see anything. It’s all going to work out for the best.”
“Thank you, Alice. Thank you for everything. You are a great friend and I can’t wait to be your sister.” As I said that a single tear rolled down my cheek. She caught it before it fell.
“Save your tears Bella. I have been waiting for this for a long time. I knew that this was going to happen. I didn’t see everything else but I knew that you were going to be a part of my family.”
I just stared at her with my mouth slightly gapping. I didn’t know what to say to her. She just told me that she knew that I was going to be a vampire. Wow.
Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper came in just then and saved me from having to say anything. Emmett came to jab me in the shoulder playfully while Jasper just shook his head at him. Rosalie sat down next to me and laid her head on my shoulder.
“I am going to miss you Bella. I am going to miss the human Bella,” she said sadly.
“Rosalie, I don’t plan on losing myself,” I replied.
“You won’t have a choice on what happens after you are bitten Bella. You just become,” Jasper said. He did know the most after all.
“I know that, but I am going to control myself as much as I can. I don’t want to be more of a problem to your family. I want to help.”
“We know that Bella. And personally, I think you are going to be a kick-ass vampire!” Emmett exclaimed enthusiastically.
Of course he would think that. He never sees anything bad ever happening, but then again, if you are built to take on bears what could scare you? Just then Edward returned and I noticed Alice get up.
“Bella, I have some things packed for you that you may need when you are gone.” With that she all but flew up the stairs and was back in no time. “Here is your stuff and Edward, here is yours as well. Good luck.”
I hadn’t seen Esme and Carlisle join the group, but I heard Esme speak first. “Bella, we will be waiting for you when you come back to us as my new daughter. I can’t wait to see you in your new life.”
“Good luck to both of you,” said Carlisle. “Stay safe. Edward, watch out for anything while she is out and make sure you find that safety line to keep her safe with you, okay?”
“Yes, I will. Thank you,” Edward replied. Everyone came one by one to hug us goodbye. And then out into the night we went. We walked to the garage and got into Edward’s silver Volvo. He pulled out and then we were flying down the road.
Within a few hours we were at an airport and aboard a flight that was a direct flight to Isle Esme… a private airplane I learned while on the plane. I had no clue that the Cullen’s had their own plane. What else am I going to learn about them? A few hours after that, we had landed on the eastern side of the island. It was daylight and I glanced over to Edward and saw that he was sparkling brightly as he said goodbye to the pilot. He grabbed our bags from the plane and guided me towards the house. The pilot had to be an employee of the Cullen’s. No one would have not cared about a man standing in front of them sparkling like there were diamonds fastened all over his skin.
After the pilot and Edward’s brief exchange, he guided me to the house that is on the island. The only house that is there. It was beautiful. Mostly windows, the Cullen’s were fond of not hiding who they really were when they were at home. The outside was nothing compared to the inside, which Esme had decorated beautifully. There was not one room that could have outdone the next. Each one was as gorgeous as the previous one. The living room done in light green and darker green accents all over, it made you feel as if you were in a forest. The kitchen looked like old Hollywood, all black and white with a few red accents all over, absolutely gorgeous. Then we made it to one of the five bedrooms in the house. It was white. Everything in the room was white and it had a spectacular view of the beach and the ocean. A palm tree was just outside the bedroom door leading out to the beach. This is the room that Edward dropped our stuff off in.
“Wow. Edward this house is amazing! Simply breathtaking.”
“Esme would be pleased to hear that you like it so much. She has spent a long time decorating this house. This island was a present from Carlisle when the two of them got married. She spent a long time making it her dream house.” He looked around the place as he spoke. I could see the admiration that he had for Esme and her design.
“It is a beautiful house. I can tell that she put a lot of love into it.” I looked around once more before sitting on the bed. Edward came to sit next to me. He took my hand and turned me so that I was facing him.
“Are you nervous Bella? Are you worried about changing?” He stared into my eyes as if trying to read my soul. It made me blush, so I looked down. Of course him staring at me like that made me blush. I couldn’t wait to get rid of that trait of mine.
“I am nervous,” I started. Of course I was nervous, but it is what I needed to do and what I wanted to do. “But I am more anxious to have it done. What should I expect?”
He looked at me and lifted my chin so that I was forced to look him in the eyes. “It is going to be hard for you Bella. It is going to be painful, I will not lie to you. You are going to have three days where your body is going to be on fire and you will wish for death instead of what you are going to be going through. When you wake up from this burning, you are going to be thirsty and that is all that you are going to want. You will want to hunt. You will be incredibly strong, stronger than even Emmett. And you are going to be fast. We haven’t a clue on what you are going to be like as a vampire Bella. It is different with each one of us. But I will be prepared for you. I will not leave you when you are going through your change, I want you to know that. You will not be alone, I will be there with you the whole time.”
I exhaled loudly. “That is a lot to take in. I am ready. When are we going to do this?”
“How about now? Are you ready Bella?” He never took his eyes off my face and I couldn’t tear my eyes from him the whole time he was explaining my change.
“I am ready. Are we going to do it in here?”
“Yes. I want you to be comfortable. Close your eyes Bella. I don’t want you to see this. I don’t want you to see me do this to you,” Edward pleaded. I couldn’t help but oblige him. I closed my eyes. A second later I felt Edward lift my face to his. He gave me one last tender kiss and said to me. “I am sorry Bella.” And then he bit me. That is the last thing I remember.
The burning took over then and I didn’t know anything but the pain. It spread throughout my body before I knew what was going on. In seconds my whole body was burning and I felt like I was screaming out loud but I didn’t hear anything other than Edward’s constant apologies. That was the one thing I heard. I didn’t dare open my eyes. I didn’t even know if I could open my eyes.
I lost track of time… endless breaths I heard from Edward, I heard birds outside the window, I heard the waves crash on the beach, but time was lost on me. I didn’t know how long I have been out with a burning body. I just knew that Edward was right. I wanted to die and I didn’t want to continue to burn like this anymore. I begged and begged for death to come to me, but it wouldn’t. I was getting what I asked for and I was being made to pay for it.
And then all of a sudden the pain was more intense and I thought for sure that I was going to die for sure. This was worse than anything I thought was possible. I didn’t know how much more of this I could handle. Please! Just let me die! I can’t go through this anymore. Let me die… let me see my parents again. Nothing is worth this pain! I felt my heart race faster and faster until I thought it was going to burst through my chest. Just when I thought it couldn’t go any faster, it just stopped. Just like that, my heart stopped and it would never beat again. What an odd feeling. Wait, shouldn’t I be dead? Why am I still thinking about my heart not beating? I started to hear Edward again…
“Bella? Are you okay? Can you hear me? Please Bella. Open your eyes. Let me know you are okay. Please. It has been three days now. I need to know that you are okay. Open your eyes.”
I couldn’t open my mouth to answer him. I couldn’t move. What was going on? Why couldn’t I move? Why couldn’t I talk? Why couldn’t I do anything? Edward never said anything about this. Did something go wrong? Am I going to be stuck this way?
“Bella! Answer me! Please!”
A/N: If you like the chapter please tell me. It is so nice to hear. I know that it has been a very long time since I got this chapter up, but please let me know if you like this or not. I really am having a difficult time with things lately and need the encouragement.
Chapter 17
“I’ll do it,” Edward said. Did I hear that right? Edward was going to change me? I was going to belong to him. “And I wanted you to know that you are going to take the last remaining part of me that feels human, but I don’t want anyone else to do this to you. I just hope that I am strong enough to not kill you, Bella.”
“You won’t hurt her. You will find the strength to stop. I know that you don’t believe that Edward, but it is true,” Carlisle said.
I don’t think I took a breath at all. I couldn’t take my eyes off of him and before I knew what I was doing I launched myself into his arms and kissed him passionately. I didn’t even think about Esme or Carlisle being right there next to me. But Edward wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me closer to him. He deepened the kiss by tilting my head back ever so gently. His hands were in my hair and a soft sigh escaped my lips. But my lips weren’t idle for long and his found mine again. Before I knew it, he lifted me up in his arms and carried me outside.
I hadn’t known that Esme and Carlisle left before Edward picked me up but when I looked back into the house they were gone. I looked back up at Edward and I had my arms wrapped around his neck. He looked back at me and smiled. By now it was dark out and the stars were out and shining brightly. He looked spectacular in the moonlight, like a marble statue of a god, only much better. How did I luck out to be with him?
He set me on the ground in Esme’s garden and eased himself next to me. He leaned back on his elbows and gestured for me to lean against him. I did and looked upon the stars. Were my parents able to see me right now? Were they able to see how happy I was in this very moment? I just realized that I hadn’t said anything to Edward since he said that he would take away my mortality.
“Edward, I-“
“Sh, don’t say anything. I know,” he said. He just pressed my head against his stone chest and I relaxed into him. We sat there staring into the stars as if they had some kind of meaning to us. I don’t know if they did or not. I don’t know how long we sat there not talking but soon we heard a noise in the trees just to the right of us. I tensed and looked to Edward. He didn’t really react, only looked in the general direction of the disturbance.
Out from the trees popped Rosalie and Emmett, no wonder Edward didn’t react. “Hey, you two. What are you doing out here?” asked Emmett. With that he pounced at Edward and gave him a quick jab to the arm. Rosalie just rolled her eyes and shook her head.
“Boys,” she said, looking to me to see if I agreed. I just smiled at her as Edward hugged me closer.
“Hey Emmett, Rosalie. We are just watching the night go by,” I said. I looked back to Edward and realized that he wasn’t watching Emmett or Rosalie, just looking at me. I blushed and looked back down.
“Awe, Edward, stop embarrassing her. That’s not nice,” Rosalie said, teasing him.
“Oh let him. I like the way she blushes,” Emmett said. Rosalie jabbed him in the ribs and he laughed. “Sorry Bella, but we can’t do that and I happen to think it is endearing. No matter what Rosalie says.”
“It’s okay Rosalie. I know that he is teasing me. I can handle it.” I laughed and Edward gave a small chuckle.
“You never cease to amaze me at all that you tolerate Bella,” Edward said. “We do need to have time to talk, but right now is not the time.” I just nodded. I was scared of what he was going to say to me and what that was going to do to me emotionally.
“Well, Rose, honey let’s leave the two lovebirds together,” Emmett, said with a smile. “But don’t keep her out too much longer Edward, she is going to get cold soon.”
“Yes father,” Edward replied with a scowl.
Emmett and Rosalie went into the house arm and arm without looking back at us. I felt Edward relax a bit after they left. I looked at him trying to read his face. It didn’t work.
“Edward? Are you okay?” I asked him timidly. I don’t know why I was scared to ask him how he was. I didn’t want to hear that I hurt him by asking to be changed. I feel that I was asking something of him that was the worst thing possible.
“Bella,” he said slowly. “I don’t know how to really react to this. Everything is happening really fast here with you. I don’t feel like you’ve had time to adjust to losing your parents, having Holly come into the picture, and now you wanting to become a monster.”
“I would not become a monster. You and your family are not monsters. How can you think that, Edward?”
“We are the perfect predators Bella. We don’t need any help to kill but we have every quality that humans like and are drawn to. Just look at you. You are sitting here with me in the open with no one here to protect and I could kill you in a heartbeat. You wouldn’t even know that you were dying.”
I sat there and let everything he just said soak in. I didn’t feel the same way he did and I don’t know if I ever would. I didn’t see the monster that he was describing. Maybe I was just grasping at life and what possibilities there were for me. I only saw that I would die if it was up to Holly and it would happen too easily. The Cullen’s couldn’t be with me all of the time. Sooner or later somehow something would get messed up and I would be alone and then she would have her opportunity. I didn’t want to put any of them at risk either. This was the only option that seemed like it would work.
I had no other family left. I only had the people that were in this house right now. They were the only family I had and the only people that matter to me now. I had to let Edward know that. Right now I wished that he would be able to see into my thoughts and see that this change will really be for the best. We only had such a small window left and we needed to make the move soon.
“Edward, I don’t see you or your family as monsters. You are all very caring and you love each other very much. And I wish that I didn’t have to put your family at risk.” I held up my hand since he started to interrupt me. “And I am going to do everything that I can to help you out. I know what I am asking is big and I know you don’t like it, but I am happy that you are going to be the one to change me. I will feel like I… um… I will feel like I belong to you.” I looked down.
He put his hand under my chin and lifted my face up so he could look into my eyes. He studied them for what seemed like forever and I felt myself getting redder as he stared. “Are you completely sure about this Bella? Do you really want this?”
“Edward, I want you and only you for the rest of eternity. And to be with your family too. I am more sure of this than I am about anything I’ve ever decided. Yes, I want to do this.” At this point I shivered without wanting to. Aside from the night turning colder, Edward was cold too, which made it worse.
“Come on. Let’s get you inside. I’ll make you a fire; get you warmed up.” He practically lifted me up without any help from me. We went into the house. I didn’t let go of him. I was sure of what I was doing but I felt the need to hang onto reality. Everything was going by fast just like Edward said. But I didn’t care anymore. I knew what I wanted.
We walked in and Edward went to the fireplace in the living room and started a fire right away. He looked back at me and shook his head. “What are we going to do with you Bella?” I laughed a small laugh and sat in front of the fireplace. Edward stood for a moment longer then he joined me on the floor.
“So. What’s the plan? How is this change going to happen? I’m sorry for bringing it up again but I just have to know what I am going to have happen.” I noticed that his eyes closed briefly and that his shoulders slumped a little with me asking.
“The plan. I guess the plan for right now is to bring you to Isle Esme and the change will take place there. Are you sure that this is what you really want to do Bella?”
“I am completely sure Edward. I don’t ever want to lose you or any of your family. I have nowhere else to go. I have nothing else to look forward to and nothing that I could ever want more in my life. As long as I have you, I will be where I need to be.”
With a sigh he replied, “Okay Bella. We will leave in a little bit. Just let me go hunting first. I don’t want to go overboard and kill you.”
I laughed at him but said, “Okay. I will wait here.” He got up without me seeing him and was gone before I could blink. A few breaths later Alice walked in the room. She must have known that Edward was gone, tricky little vampire.
“Bella, how are you doing? Getting nervous yet?” She sat down in the same spot that Edward just vacated next to me.
I shook my head. “Not yet. But I am sure that when Edward gets back and he and I start to leave that I will be.”
Alice smiled at me and wrapped her arms around my shoulders. “You are going to be fine, you know? I don’t see anything bad happening to you. I’ve been watching out for any changes, any negative changes, and I don’t see anything. It’s all going to work out for the best.”
“Thank you, Alice. Thank you for everything. You are a great friend and I can’t wait to be your sister.” As I said that a single tear rolled down my cheek. She caught it before it fell.
“Save your tears Bella. I have been waiting for this for a long time. I knew that this was going to happen. I didn’t see everything else but I knew that you were going to be a part of my family.”
I just stared at her with my mouth slightly gapping. I didn’t know what to say to her. She just told me that she knew that I was going to be a vampire. Wow.
Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper came in just then and saved me from having to say anything. Emmett came to jab me in the shoulder playfully while Jasper just shook his head at him. Rosalie sat down next to me and laid her head on my shoulder.
“I am going to miss you Bella. I am going to miss the human Bella,” she said sadly.
“Rosalie, I don’t plan on losing myself,” I replied.
“You won’t have a choice on what happens after you are bitten Bella. You just become,” Jasper said. He did know the most after all.
“I know that, but I am going to control myself as much as I can. I don’t want to be more of a problem to your family. I want to help.”
“We know that Bella. And personally, I think you are going to be a kick-ass vampire!” Emmett exclaimed enthusiastically.
Of course he would think that. He never sees anything bad ever happening, but then again, if you are built to take on bears what could scare you? Just then Edward returned and I noticed Alice get up.
“Bella, I have some things packed for you that you may need when you are gone.” With that she all but flew up the stairs and was back in no time. “Here is your stuff and Edward, here is yours as well. Good luck.”
I hadn’t seen Esme and Carlisle join the group, but I heard Esme speak first. “Bella, we will be waiting for you when you come back to us as my new daughter. I can’t wait to see you in your new life.”
“Good luck to both of you,” said Carlisle. “Stay safe. Edward, watch out for anything while she is out and make sure you find that safety line to keep her safe with you, okay?”
“Yes, I will. Thank you,” Edward replied. Everyone came one by one to hug us goodbye. And then out into the night we went. We walked to the garage and got into Edward’s silver Volvo. He pulled out and then we were flying down the road.
Within a few hours we were at an airport and aboard a flight that was a direct flight to Isle Esme… a private airplane I learned while on the plane. I had no clue that the Cullen’s had their own plane. What else am I going to learn about them? A few hours after that, we had landed on the eastern side of the island. It was daylight and I glanced over to Edward and saw that he was sparkling brightly as he said goodbye to the pilot. He grabbed our bags from the plane and guided me towards the house. The pilot had to be an employee of the Cullen’s. No one would have not cared about a man standing in front of them sparkling like there were diamonds fastened all over his skin.
After the pilot and Edward’s brief exchange, he guided me to the house that is on the island. The only house that is there. It was beautiful. Mostly windows, the Cullen’s were fond of not hiding who they really were when they were at home. The outside was nothing compared to the inside, which Esme had decorated beautifully. There was not one room that could have outdone the next. Each one was as gorgeous as the previous one. The living room done in light green and darker green accents all over, it made you feel as if you were in a forest. The kitchen looked like old Hollywood, all black and white with a few red accents all over, absolutely gorgeous. Then we made it to one of the five bedrooms in the house. It was white. Everything in the room was white and it had a spectacular view of the beach and the ocean. A palm tree was just outside the bedroom door leading out to the beach. This is the room that Edward dropped our stuff off in.
“Wow. Edward this house is amazing! Simply breathtaking.”
“Esme would be pleased to hear that you like it so much. She has spent a long time decorating this house. This island was a present from Carlisle when the two of them got married. She spent a long time making it her dream house.” He looked around the place as he spoke. I could see the admiration that he had for Esme and her design.
“It is a beautiful house. I can tell that she put a lot of love into it.” I looked around once more before sitting on the bed. Edward came to sit next to me. He took my hand and turned me so that I was facing him.
“Are you nervous Bella? Are you worried about changing?” He stared into my eyes as if trying to read my soul. It made me blush, so I looked down. Of course him staring at me like that made me blush. I couldn’t wait to get rid of that trait of mine.
“I am nervous,” I started. Of course I was nervous, but it is what I needed to do and what I wanted to do. “But I am more anxious to have it done. What should I expect?”
He looked at me and lifted my chin so that I was forced to look him in the eyes. “It is going to be hard for you Bella. It is going to be painful, I will not lie to you. You are going to have three days where your body is going to be on fire and you will wish for death instead of what you are going to be going through. When you wake up from this burning, you are going to be thirsty and that is all that you are going to want. You will want to hunt. You will be incredibly strong, stronger than even Emmett. And you are going to be fast. We haven’t a clue on what you are going to be like as a vampire Bella. It is different with each one of us. But I will be prepared for you. I will not leave you when you are going through your change, I want you to know that. You will not be alone, I will be there with you the whole time.”
I exhaled loudly. “That is a lot to take in. I am ready. When are we going to do this?”
“How about now? Are you ready Bella?” He never took his eyes off my face and I couldn’t tear my eyes from him the whole time he was explaining my change.
“I am ready. Are we going to do it in here?”
“Yes. I want you to be comfortable. Close your eyes Bella. I don’t want you to see this. I don’t want you to see me do this to you,” Edward pleaded. I couldn’t help but oblige him. I closed my eyes. A second later I felt Edward lift my face to his. He gave me one last tender kiss and said to me. “I am sorry Bella.” And then he bit me. That is the last thing I remember.
The burning took over then and I didn’t know anything but the pain. It spread throughout my body before I knew what was going on. In seconds my whole body was burning and I felt like I was screaming out loud but I didn’t hear anything other than Edward’s constant apologies. That was the one thing I heard. I didn’t dare open my eyes. I didn’t even know if I could open my eyes.
I lost track of time… endless breaths I heard from Edward, I heard birds outside the window, I heard the waves crash on the beach, but time was lost on me. I didn’t know how long I have been out with a burning body. I just knew that Edward was right. I wanted to die and I didn’t want to continue to burn like this anymore. I begged and begged for death to come to me, but it wouldn’t. I was getting what I asked for and I was being made to pay for it.
And then all of a sudden the pain was more intense and I thought for sure that I was going to die for sure. This was worse than anything I thought was possible. I didn’t know how much more of this I could handle. Please! Just let me die! I can’t go through this anymore. Let me die… let me see my parents again. Nothing is worth this pain! I felt my heart race faster and faster until I thought it was going to burst through my chest. Just when I thought it couldn’t go any faster, it just stopped. Just like that, my heart stopped and it would never beat again. What an odd feeling. Wait, shouldn’t I be dead? Why am I still thinking about my heart not beating? I started to hear Edward again…
“Bella? Are you okay? Can you hear me? Please Bella. Open your eyes. Let me know you are okay. Please. It has been three days now. I need to know that you are okay. Open your eyes.”
I couldn’t open my mouth to answer him. I couldn’t move. What was going on? Why couldn’t I move? Why couldn’t I talk? Why couldn’t I do anything? Edward never said anything about this. Did something go wrong? Am I going to be stuck this way?
“Bella! Answer me! Please!”
