I can't see anything. I feel like I'm falling in purgatory and about to throw up. Finally, I stop falling and I open my eyes. I'm laying down on the ground outside. It looks like I'm at the same spot where Haruhi and Itsuki changed clothes before sneaking into North High with Kyon. I realize I'm starting to sweat. It's like in the middle of summer. This feels familiar. But this can't be a dream. Everything here feels so realistic. I guess I'm really in the Haruhi universe. Now I'm sure before it wasn't a dream either. I still have a chance. Anyway, I need to know "when" I am. So I run to the convenience store and pick up a newspaper to check the date. It's Tanabata, 1996. I better hurry to Yuki's apartment.
On the way, I check over at the park where Kyon should be sitting and talking with adult Mikuru. Sure enough, I see them there. I can't hear what they're saying. Doesn't matter. Yuki is waiting for me...or is she?
I stand in front of Yuki's apartment front gates. I was just about to pick up the phone standing right next to me - but suddenly, Yuki opens the gate for me. She's standing right in front of me, with that expression that makes me feel safe.
"Hey, Yuki.", I say with a smile on my face.
"Hi."
"Should we go up to your apartment?"
"Yes. Follow me.", she says as she turns around and starts walking to the elevator.
I follow her. We're standing in the elevator in complete silence. I turn over to look at her. She's so cute. She's wearing glasses. I still hope I can get back to human Yuki.
Eventually, the elevator stops and we walk to her apartment. She opens the door and we take off our shoes. Yuki goes to the kitchen and makes tea. I enter the living room and I see how different it is from before I was there. It's way more empty.
Yuki comes back from the kitchen with two cups of green tea. We both start drinking. I think it's delicious. I put the cup down and look at Yuki.
"Yuki, I need some answers."
She looks at me in silence.
"Tell me - What's going on here? How did I get here? What's my role in all of this?"
She puts down her cup and looks at me.
"Please, at least tell me this: Why me?"
"What do you mean?"
"What I mean is, why am I, the one out of billions of people, living and breathing on my planet, to be transported to this world? What's so special about me?"
"Let's cover all of this, Kevin. The events that have been happening in my world were created by me in your world as a popular anime franchise to be a proxy that would help you gain vital information of the incoming events."
I jump out in surprise.
"Wait, what?! So you mean, me being here – this being an animated movie in my world – all of it is actually happening and you're perfectly aware of it?!"
"That's correct.", she answers calm and calculated as always.
"Once you've done your research, and when the time was right, I would send you to our world so that you could prevent Kyon from turning the human me that changes the world in 1999 back to the regular alien me."
"Okay, now hold on, let me get this straight. If I heard you correctly, you're saying that you need someone to prevent Kyon from turning the human you that changes the world in 1999, right?"
"Yes."
"It's kind of weird, because… YOU are the one, who left the clue that would lead Kyon to the emergency escape route to begin with."
She stares at me without answering.
"I mean, sure, I remember the reason for it: you were…. how should I say it… sympathetic towards him? And as a result of this, rightfully so, you decided to leave him an emergency exit for him. Because you trusted him, but then it makes no sense as to why you would have someone like me not only try to prevent him from turning you back to your normal alien self, but also letting Kyon use the escape route to begin with, if you wanted to stay a human. Please explain."
"You're correct. I left Kyon the emergency exit as a back-up route in case he doesn't like the alternate-esc normal world, and would like to come back to the regular world. However, once I left the clue to it in one time period – there's no going back. I can relive past and looped events, but I don't have a whole lot of direct or indirect influence on their actions. So I needed someone from the outside to help me change the outcome of the picture."
"But wait, why wouldn't you want Kyon to discover the bookmark if you already did it once, are you saying that you regret leaving that bookmark for Kyon? I mean, what happened?"
"You."
"I don't get it – what did I do?"
"It's complicated."
"Don't worry – all ears."
She pauses for a bit, before continuing.
"The Data Integration Thought Entity was doing research on various social, physical and mental skills of humans of your world."
"Alright, proceed."
"I was tasked with observing the social, physical and mental skills of Swedish students. To be more precise: Skiljebo School - your compound."
"I...see. And then you found me somehow, but... still, it's a bit odd that you would choose me for this. I mean, for what purpose?"
"I want you to do the following: as you're probably aware, both Kyon and Mikuru Asahina are soon about to appear in this area in order for me to send them forward back into 1999, in order for them to change the human me back into the regular me, after I change the world. You know how it goes: I tell them I changed the world, I give them the nanomachines, the gun, and Kyon goes travelling in time with Ms. Asahina, but this time, you go travelling with them. After that, you—"
"Hold up, this just doesn't add up. I understand why you would need to send Kyon back to 1999, because that's where he belongs at this point, but if you don't want them to turn you back into an alien – then why give them these instructions?"
"Simple - like I said before, I can't influence the events that have already happened before – Kyon has already used the emergency escape route, consequentially, it'd be a waste of his time coming here, therefore I'm obligated in giving him these instructions."
"Then how can we prevent this?"
"This is where you come in. After you, Kyon and Ms. Asahina teleport to the year 1999, with the help of Ms. Asahina, you'll need to go back in time right to the very beginning of your journey."
"You mean… when I found myself inexplicably in Kyon's house?"
"Correct."
"So what was the point of all this?"
"Same point as me, creating the franchise in your world – gaining information."
"About what, the…the bookmark? What do you want me to do with it? Hide it from Kyon or something?"
"Exactly just that"
"But why"?
"If Kyon doesn't discover the clue for the escape route, then he won't start searching for the former members of the SOS brigade. And it's all over. He'll live his normal life like he always wanted, and I'll remain human. Everyone wins."
I sarcastically smile and nod.
"Everyone?"
"Why do you ask?"
"What about me? Once everything's over, what do I do? I got back to my world the first time using the same escape route you left for Kyon, but once everything's done, then what happens next? I'm stuck here – that's what."
"Incorrect. I left a completely separate emergency exit route specifically made for you in advance, the first time you started your journey."
"Really? And what is it?"
She's silent for a moment.
"Just as with Kyon, I'll give you a hint: it's something that at one point in your life, you found to be unusual."
"Alright, fair enough, just… why?"
"What do you mean?"
"What made you change your mind since the first time all of this had happened? It must've been something huge, I'm sure. And more importantly… why me? I honestly hope that I wasn't just a random choice or I don't know… something weird like you creating a franchise to see… who would obsess over you more."
There's a moment of silence.
"You don't understand.", Yuki states.
"I chose you for this long before I created the proxy."
I turn to her.
"Then why? What's so special about me?"
There's a pause before she starts.
"You and I… we aren't so different, after all."
"What do you mean?"
"I'm not given the opportunity of expressing emotions in this vessel, and after discovering you, I realized, that therefore, changing the world was my only option, but every time I would become normal, I would be changed back to my original form, due to the events already sent in motion, therefore, I--"
"Wait, hold on a second, what did you just say? Did I hear you correctly? Did you just say that you're doing this after discovering me?"
She's silent. I start to pace about in the room.
"No no no no no, no way, there's just no way.", I think to myself. It's too good to be true. I'm literally crying inside from joy right now due to the realization I've come to.
"You… You mean you actually…", I try to talk, but I either stutter or chuckle.
I sit in front of her and spit it out.
"God, you have no idea how much this means to me. I've been thinking of you, dreaming of meeting you – a fictional 2D animated character for Christ's sakes, for such a long time, but to actually know that you exist, to meet you, to…to hear this from you - is just...just...amazing, really. I mean, freaking hell, it's insane! If only you'd know what it feels like! It's wonderful!"
"I don't, but if you can help me, soon I may able to."
"Right… Right.", I try to catch my breath.
"Man, alright… but, there's a problem. Once you finally become human – you'll lose all memories of your original self, meaning that… you won't remember me, or any of this. And not only that, but I've also got nowhere to go – it's more than likely that my family doesn't exist in this universe, so I've got no contacts, no finances, no ways to Sweden, or education. I mean, I know you've prepared an escape route for me and all back to my original world, but damn it, I want to stay with you, I—"
"Another reason I needed you to close the loop, is because every time I would change the world, another version of me would be created in your world."
"… What?"
"However, your world's version of me wouldn't last long, and would get annulated every time I would get restored to my original self, but this time we have the opportunity to prolong its existence."
I'm stunned by this. Somewhere in my world…. There was a real Yuki after all?
"Your worlds' version of me, however...just like my human counterpart, will have no memory of this past life. I've arranged her creation so that she would eventually meet you upon your return, the downside of the situation being, however, is that it's not likely that you will realize her being that version of me, for obvious reasons: different appearance, personality traits, etc."
"Doesn't matter, I'm sure I'll figure it out."
She looks down.
"I hope so."
I put my hand on her shoulder.
"Look, you have no idea how well I know you, I'm sure that if I meet my world's version of you, then rest assured, I'll realize that—"
Suddenly there's a knock on the door. It's Kyon and Mikuru. I remove my hand from her shoulder and stand up.
"Well, time to set things up in motion, eh?"
She nods, gets up and heads for the door as I watch in anticipation of what's to come.
On the way, I check over at the park where Kyon should be sitting and talking with adult Mikuru. Sure enough, I see them there. I can't hear what they're saying. Doesn't matter. Yuki is waiting for me...or is she?
I stand in front of Yuki's apartment front gates. I was just about to pick up the phone standing right next to me - but suddenly, Yuki opens the gate for me. She's standing right in front of me, with that expression that makes me feel safe.
"Hey, Yuki.", I say with a smile on my face.
"Hi."
"Should we go up to your apartment?"
"Yes. Follow me.", she says as she turns around and starts walking to the elevator.
I follow her. We're standing in the elevator in complete silence. I turn over to look at her. She's so cute. She's wearing glasses. I still hope I can get back to human Yuki.
Eventually, the elevator stops and we walk to her apartment. She opens the door and we take off our shoes. Yuki goes to the kitchen and makes tea. I enter the living room and I see how different it is from before I was there. It's way more empty.
Yuki comes back from the kitchen with two cups of green tea. We both start drinking. I think it's delicious. I put the cup down and look at Yuki.
"Yuki, I need some answers."
She looks at me in silence.
"Tell me - What's going on here? How did I get here? What's my role in all of this?"
She puts down her cup and looks at me.
"Please, at least tell me this: Why me?"
"What do you mean?"
"What I mean is, why am I, the one out of billions of people, living and breathing on my planet, to be transported to this world? What's so special about me?"
"Let's cover all of this, Kevin. The events that have been happening in my world were created by me in your world as a popular anime franchise to be a proxy that would help you gain vital information of the incoming events."
I jump out in surprise.
"Wait, what?! So you mean, me being here – this being an animated movie in my world – all of it is actually happening and you're perfectly aware of it?!"
"That's correct.", she answers calm and calculated as always.
"Once you've done your research, and when the time was right, I would send you to our world so that you could prevent Kyon from turning the human me that changes the world in 1999 back to the regular alien me."
"Okay, now hold on, let me get this straight. If I heard you correctly, you're saying that you need someone to prevent Kyon from turning the human you that changes the world in 1999, right?"
"Yes."
"It's kind of weird, because… YOU are the one, who left the clue that would lead Kyon to the emergency escape route to begin with."
She stares at me without answering.
"I mean, sure, I remember the reason for it: you were…. how should I say it… sympathetic towards him? And as a result of this, rightfully so, you decided to leave him an emergency exit for him. Because you trusted him, but then it makes no sense as to why you would have someone like me not only try to prevent him from turning you back to your normal alien self, but also letting Kyon use the escape route to begin with, if you wanted to stay a human. Please explain."
"You're correct. I left Kyon the emergency exit as a back-up route in case he doesn't like the alternate-esc normal world, and would like to come back to the regular world. However, once I left the clue to it in one time period – there's no going back. I can relive past and looped events, but I don't have a whole lot of direct or indirect influence on their actions. So I needed someone from the outside to help me change the outcome of the picture."
"But wait, why wouldn't you want Kyon to discover the bookmark if you already did it once, are you saying that you regret leaving that bookmark for Kyon? I mean, what happened?"
"You."
"I don't get it – what did I do?"
"It's complicated."
"Don't worry – all ears."
She pauses for a bit, before continuing.
"The Data Integration Thought Entity was doing research on various social, physical and mental skills of humans of your world."
"Alright, proceed."
"I was tasked with observing the social, physical and mental skills of Swedish students. To be more precise: Skiljebo School - your compound."
"I...see. And then you found me somehow, but... still, it's a bit odd that you would choose me for this. I mean, for what purpose?"
"I want you to do the following: as you're probably aware, both Kyon and Mikuru Asahina are soon about to appear in this area in order for me to send them forward back into 1999, in order for them to change the human me back into the regular me, after I change the world. You know how it goes: I tell them I changed the world, I give them the nanomachines, the gun, and Kyon goes travelling in time with Ms. Asahina, but this time, you go travelling with them. After that, you—"
"Hold up, this just doesn't add up. I understand why you would need to send Kyon back to 1999, because that's where he belongs at this point, but if you don't want them to turn you back into an alien – then why give them these instructions?"
"Simple - like I said before, I can't influence the events that have already happened before – Kyon has already used the emergency escape route, consequentially, it'd be a waste of his time coming here, therefore I'm obligated in giving him these instructions."
"Then how can we prevent this?"
"This is where you come in. After you, Kyon and Ms. Asahina teleport to the year 1999, with the help of Ms. Asahina, you'll need to go back in time right to the very beginning of your journey."
"You mean… when I found myself inexplicably in Kyon's house?"
"Correct."
"So what was the point of all this?"
"Same point as me, creating the franchise in your world – gaining information."
"About what, the…the bookmark? What do you want me to do with it? Hide it from Kyon or something?"
"Exactly just that"
"But why"?
"If Kyon doesn't discover the clue for the escape route, then he won't start searching for the former members of the SOS brigade. And it's all over. He'll live his normal life like he always wanted, and I'll remain human. Everyone wins."
I sarcastically smile and nod.
"Everyone?"
"Why do you ask?"
"What about me? Once everything's over, what do I do? I got back to my world the first time using the same escape route you left for Kyon, but once everything's done, then what happens next? I'm stuck here – that's what."
"Incorrect. I left a completely separate emergency exit route specifically made for you in advance, the first time you started your journey."
"Really? And what is it?"
She's silent for a moment.
"Just as with Kyon, I'll give you a hint: it's something that at one point in your life, you found to be unusual."
"Alright, fair enough, just… why?"
"What do you mean?"
"What made you change your mind since the first time all of this had happened? It must've been something huge, I'm sure. And more importantly… why me? I honestly hope that I wasn't just a random choice or I don't know… something weird like you creating a franchise to see… who would obsess over you more."
There's a moment of silence.
"You don't understand.", Yuki states.
"I chose you for this long before I created the proxy."
I turn to her.
"Then why? What's so special about me?"
There's a pause before she starts.
"You and I… we aren't so different, after all."
"What do you mean?"
"I'm not given the opportunity of expressing emotions in this vessel, and after discovering you, I realized, that therefore, changing the world was my only option, but every time I would become normal, I would be changed back to my original form, due to the events already sent in motion, therefore, I--"
"Wait, hold on a second, what did you just say? Did I hear you correctly? Did you just say that you're doing this after discovering me?"
She's silent. I start to pace about in the room.
"No no no no no, no way, there's just no way.", I think to myself. It's too good to be true. I'm literally crying inside from joy right now due to the realization I've come to.
"You… You mean you actually…", I try to talk, but I either stutter or chuckle.
I sit in front of her and spit it out.
"God, you have no idea how much this means to me. I've been thinking of you, dreaming of meeting you – a fictional 2D animated character for Christ's sakes, for such a long time, but to actually know that you exist, to meet you, to…to hear this from you - is just...just...amazing, really. I mean, freaking hell, it's insane! If only you'd know what it feels like! It's wonderful!"
"I don't, but if you can help me, soon I may able to."
"Right… Right.", I try to catch my breath.
"Man, alright… but, there's a problem. Once you finally become human – you'll lose all memories of your original self, meaning that… you won't remember me, or any of this. And not only that, but I've also got nowhere to go – it's more than likely that my family doesn't exist in this universe, so I've got no contacts, no finances, no ways to Sweden, or education. I mean, I know you've prepared an escape route for me and all back to my original world, but damn it, I want to stay with you, I—"
"Another reason I needed you to close the loop, is because every time I would change the world, another version of me would be created in your world."
"… What?"
"However, your world's version of me wouldn't last long, and would get annulated every time I would get restored to my original self, but this time we have the opportunity to prolong its existence."
I'm stunned by this. Somewhere in my world…. There was a real Yuki after all?
"Your worlds' version of me, however...just like my human counterpart, will have no memory of this past life. I've arranged her creation so that she would eventually meet you upon your return, the downside of the situation being, however, is that it's not likely that you will realize her being that version of me, for obvious reasons: different appearance, personality traits, etc."
"Doesn't matter, I'm sure I'll figure it out."
She looks down.
"I hope so."
I put my hand on her shoulder.
"Look, you have no idea how well I know you, I'm sure that if I meet my world's version of you, then rest assured, I'll realize that—"
Suddenly there's a knock on the door. It's Kyon and Mikuru. I remove my hand from her shoulder and stand up.
"Well, time to set things up in motion, eh?"
She nods, gets up and heads for the door as I watch in anticipation of what's to come.
